UNHhhh Ep. 115: Walking Children in Nature Part 1

we're both given two different outdoor styles: Pajama jeans, this is what I'd wear on my second date with a guy when he says, you know you're not going fishing. I'd be like Cher and show up, bring this. with a rod and I would catch a fish pulling that fish out to catch it has tits we can talk about that hello I'm the toxic lube that left you looking like an irritated old Trixie Mattel and I run a specialty hotel and telephone service that provides gentlemen the company of a young woman for a moment Katja and welcome to the show we talk about whatever we want it's our lord not yours I think love hello everyone I'm Miss Darienne Lake from the sixth season of RuPaul's Drag Race make sure you welcome RuPaul's Drag with the that's the May 1, 2 and 3 May 2 is Pandora's birthday and she will be turning 87, so bring a gift or our card.

See you there. A big kiss from a big girl. I feel like this is the first time we're talking. about something I have an advantage in, yeah, I wouldn't go so far as to say outdoors, wood, when you raise your voice, I'll say maybe I'm biased, I don't think it really gets prettier or better. that like the rural midwest like northeast wisconsin is beautiful if you go somewhere where there are actually seasons and there are actually trees it's lit new england falls in love with the foley i think the boilers for the foliage toilet toilet toilet store mess it up boil It's Bob Lewis I'm obsessed with you I can't say boilers, folders, their foliage, I say boy, well, something about the outdoors, the look, I love flannel and straight jeans and I like booties, yeah, and I I like a father a lot, yes, but I worry that people don't think I'm fashionable but it's okay to be from the country while dressing like you from the country I think you're in danger with anyone anything you're fashionable I've never worn jeans and drag so far it's hot I'll say something great about living in the country was nothing more than an odyssey of privacy.

I spent many of my days alone in the woods all day. Now, what do you do a lot in the woods? Had a swing, you know, climb trees, build forts, cut, yeah you know we did it, we did a me and friend of mine, we made a huge satanic ritual space in the woods, something fun to do, we did it and we walked around it, did you think you were doing it like you were ever a kid and you're like, yeah, we thought we were doing rituals? my magic, yes, yes, we thought we were doing rituals, mom, yes, we finished, which one was it that you were turning it off?

We were turning it off. We turned to crafts once. Yes, totally, totally, were you a boy scout? Absolutely. I was a boy scout and I. I'm from a rural area so we would go to Boy Scout camp which was in a bigger city than ours so it would be like we had to rough it somewhere closer to something like Walgreens land. I mean, yeah, this isn't my house, yeah, we don't eat interns. Great, oh yeah, we're so broke we had to treat the cat and beat the dog. Yes, sometimes you like to look at the stars.

You know, look at the sky like oh, there's. a o Cassiopeia, yes, Cassiopeia, what are the big ones? It has to be the Big Dipper, the Big Dipper, yeah, that's a little easy. Hercules, shut up, no, seriously, Cassiopeia, have you ever done that poor thing? We look at the clouds and make shapes. We made a better center with this, take a picture, take a piece of black construction paper, catch snowflakes and look at it with a magnifying glass, that's poor, it's just that we went to a Catholic school in the, you know what the moral of the story, everyone is different, sure, every snowflake with that.

Could you see all the details? Gods, mom, God, God, yes, it's incredible, it's God's work, she said: I love God, right? stays on the trampoline, yeah, even on the trampoline, yeah, you wake up wet, we do what's up with that, I don't know, I thought I heard when I peed, oh, you know, it was, it was God being like, you know, I know funny, I'll say this look. I look like a boy from behind I hate fishing I hate it Have you done me fishing? Yes, of course, danger never has. It's so strange and boring. Who is ice fishing?

You can drill a hole this size in the ice and wait. The ice is thick enough to hold you, I'll do it, it's just an excuse to get drunk, you think that's it, yeah, all the fishing is just an excuse to enjoy yourself and then people have ice like a shack, yeah, and they It stays there on the ice and you I just hope it never falls and people continue driving on the ice. Live fish also stand out on their way there, but they are cold-blooded. I get it, but if the water is frozen, how come the fish aren't frozen?

How come the water is only frozen at the top? Mother Nature then God said we once had sex in the forest, that's so sad. I don't know why we had makeup content, not makeup content. Kissing contestant who dated in high school. We did this as if we were dancing and then we read. Do you know how to kiss girls? Yes, we were kissing the girls. The owners. I didn't get an erection because we lasted so long. It was a makeup. It was a kissing contest. So who could last the longest? But I really don't know. Anyway, what was the point, Mark and whoever the dead man was, he murdered, they drool hanging, well, they had rules hanging, they couldn't keep it together, they drool hanging before, how did you break up in the woods?

We had roommates and one day we wanted to just kiss or be alone or whatever and we were on campus and the campus in Milwaukee had a lot of bushes and trees and we just found a bunch of bushes, yeah no one understands us it's just us doing outside out of the frying pan uncircumcised people are an uncircumcised heritage people need to grow up people need to grow up discrimination is disgusting what are you talking about people hate people with foreskins why are gay people rotten are you serious? I use this as a thing, I mean, I know about this I don't know about that I thought they liked the foreskin A lot of people are grossed out by the intact foreskin, like how your son's name is Devon listen to how they call like an anteater, whatever be it the disgusting people you're used to.

It looks like this, yeah, before some weird rabbi cut it up and sucked the blood out, there was a hepatitis-like outbreak in the Hasidic community once because, for that reason, crazy mom, I love me. I also like the way people's heads smell. unpleasant when they come in from the cold look at her like a furry huh no like you know how you get into your head so it's a little unpleasant no it's because of a hat oh yeah oh okay thank you so it has sense. Funny people take off their hats and have their hair close to their heads, so if a man comes from chopping wood, his cheeks are already there.

I think it's beautiful, you ride a sled. I used to go sledding with the homeschooled kids, oh, because, by the way, every day. their life is a snow day, they were very religious homeschooled kids, they went sledding in floor-length skirts and I think this is crazy, you are Sarah, simple and tall, it's December, can we get some leggings for Mary Sue and Phineas no, wait, wait, wait, wait, excuse me, I didn't see the game, well, don't start. I have to say that I walked in the desert 50 miles and then slept in a tent with no outdoor plumbing. the store made enough pipes so it was pouring rain we were

walking

I'm talking about the moment we wake up to the moment we go to bed we're

walking

but gore-tex hiking boots mom at the end of the day I took those boots off gore dry abyss -tex covered in blood blood was this before the phone didn't work cell phone no I didn't bring a cell phone oh I sprained my ankle no dead phone wait wait oh okay then the court reviews the rumor of the gore-tex walking to the coast 50 miles away, didn't we say forget it, so we got on it anyway? um, now quick, there's a Russian-themed gay bar called Kremlin.

This was at the height of my Russian obsessions. It was like I had to go. I went there, this guy. He got me so drunk I was like a builder, here we go, construction, Mandy, he brought me home and he wanted me to eat him, but I wouldn't take my boots off, so he had his pants down to his ankles and his boots on his bed, as if he were straddling. I'll hold onto the headboard and sit on his face. My dick wouldn't get hard because I'm so drunk and he kept saying what's your king, what should be a tank?

I don't know and then I went home. I never took my boots off I never took my boots off the outdoors can be very clean outdoors it's not alyssum what the outdoors is but the back there are no walls there you go look and an indoor outhouse there's a place called Kentucky Kingdom in Kentucky is known to be a biblical themed theme park and there was a girl that was on one of those rides oh my legs decapitated legs cut off you're writing a god riding theme your legs were cut off take the hint no one is looking. out for you no one kicked no one is taking care of you from the knee down legs cut then cut she she has the legs she has bangs let's go