Public Speaking

Guys, there are so many great videos on the Internet and we can't react to all of them, but there are so many great videos that I want to talk about, so we thought we'd, you know, address some of them. Watch some videos. Hmm. Do you want to see some videos? Let's watch a video. Do you want to see a video? Let's watch a video. I feel like we're making a sketch. I just want to watch a fucking video, it's not that serious. Let's watch this video. This one is called Trash, Trash, Chuck. How did I get trash from Chuck? "Chuck Giampa flops in his shoebox debut".

Ugh...ooh! Poor Chuck. Also joining our broadcast team tonight is a man who had a long and distinguished career as a ring judge... The guy on the left has a bit of a boring face, doesn't he? Is that the guy who forgets? Or is it someone else? Hmm, I think he's someone else. You hope so because that guy seems like the light never turns on in his head. Two of them were world championship matches. And Chuck Giampa will be joining us tonight to give a special... Doesn't he look fucking bored? I mean, he looks at that face, just get closer.

Oh my god, what happened buddy? You can see trouble brewing when it's his turn to speak. It looks like it's going to be him. I can see that guy saying: And Chuck Giampa is joining us tonight to give us some special information. And Chuck, tell our viewers a little bit about what you're going to do on this broadcast tonight. Thanks, Al. No, that's the guy. Alright, let's take a look here. Let's leave this moment before the game here. Good. He seems like he has a lot of confidence. He looks presentable, I hope for a good report.

He looks like he's going to give a speech now. Yeah, he seems ready to go, to be honest with you. Tonight I'll take you inside the mind of a judge, okay. Tonight I will take you inside the mind of a judge. Yeah. Shit, Oh God, he's fucking around, he just had a complete abortion. Oh shit. That moment when you just like him, you see it happening in his eyes. Did you see that? I-I empathize with him. Oh yeah. I know that feeling of... I mean, maybe I haven't been in that exact moment, but I'm very sensitive to his emotions right now.

Yes. Yuck. Me too. All right, Chuck will join us tonight to add his thoughts on judging. Damn dude, that was it! The beginning and end of Chuck's career. The worst shame is when you like to empathize with them. You may like to feel the chill of it. Not like, "Fuck, this guy is an idiot." I don't care that he made a fool of himself. But it's like "oh god." You're in front of the camera, sweating, it's your big moment, this is a great job opportunity, it all comes down to this. *impersonating Chuck* "Let's get into the mind of a judge today..." Hila: "Looking around, maybe something..." Ethan: Looking for help Hila: go up Hila: A fire will start in the building and everyone will have to run away.

Ethan: Did you want to read something from your book? Both: Yes Woman: Did you want to try reading something from your book? Yes Has something like this ever happened to you? Hila: Yes Man: Yes, really? Do I know this story? Hila: Well... Ethan: Am I learning something about you? It's not just one story, it's like... Do you have a whole catalog of shit that you ruined, Hila? Open it buddy, I'm all ears No, but when I was in school, when we had to do artwork or exhibitions, and when you present it, you have to present it, you have to present it to the whole class and to some teachers.

The Dreaded Classroom Presentation And, God, it was like, I don't know what happened but every time it was my turn, I just couldn't speak Man: Years ago they tried... Hila is very shy Hila definitely has a lot of trouble

speaking

in class.

public

. Yes. She's working on it. I think at least with the camera it's like Both: it's not a real person, it's just the lens and maybe there's someone behind it, but and with you I feel comfortable, so I guess... *laughs* It works. A lot of people have been telling me that. to make a move on you Hila People have given me the green light, they think you might like me No, I see you as my best friend I see you more as my sister, honestly Yes People still ask: "Is Hila your sister or your wife ?" Yes, to be honest, we are married, but I have always thought of you as a sister.

Both: *laughs* That's so weird. Hila, by the way guys, she's my wife in case you didn't know. She is my lovely wife. People also ask about my wedding ring. Hila: I have one, Ethan has one, but he's so fucking awkward and I tried. I tried using it for six full months, but I like it. It's so fucked up that I dare one of you to use it, it's like you use it. I can't stop playing with it I don't know why I don't care at all oh it drives me crazy I don't even take it off I forget I have it You're a lady, you wear jewelry, it's in your genes okay? you're knowing your role, so just kidding, no, but I think growing up wearing rings because I never wear my games, maybe those kind of games, it surprised me and I'm doing this all day, fucking crazy, I'm lucky to still have it. my finger on.

Take it out of my hand, man. You didn't ask if that ever happened to me, Hila. I was going to... Were you? --Did it ever happen to you? No. It never happened. You are so perfect. -No, it happened. In fact, I think everyone is terrified of

public

speaking

. He makes me so fucking anxious, but I've never fucked him up this much. I remember one time at summer camp, I think he was 13 or 14 years old. We had...we were doing a play, I had one fucking line and I remember it to this day. I heard a lark flying through the park.

Well. That was my only sentence and I can say it 20 years later! I must have said it in my head like a hundred thousand times. I heard a lark flying through the park. In that scenario I can't do it well and it was very humiliating. Because I was with my friends and my classmates were together all summer as if we all knew each other. How old were you? 13 or 14 years old. I was an impressionable young man. And every social misstep counted for quite a bit. And I was there, Sean was there by the way. -Oh. -He was there, she got his fucking line right.

Of course. And I was the fucking retarded fool that I was: fucking Sean. So perfect...except he smells pretty bad, but that's neither here nor there. Rest in peace, Sean. Rest in dad. Rest in dad. But why are our brains programmed to screw us? What happened there friend? I'm a- god- why? I don't know. Stinks. -Our bodies stink. Well. Hey! Hey, out there, Mother Nature, God, whoever wants to listen, you fucked up, buddy. I'm here trying to give a speech and I'm stumbling like an idiot. You're probably up there laughing, you little trash, you little wrench.

Oh my god, my gears. Oh, and you also know what the worst thing about that situation is. The moment when everyone starts feeling bad for you and then starts asking you questions like they're out of pity. Did you want to try reading something from your book? Yes... And you are aware of it. It's like I can't talk, but I don't. I didn't like suddenly becoming autistic and I'm not fucking drunk. And the same person, yes, exactly, I didn't like him, he just had a complete mental breakdown and couldn't speak. So Hila, tell me do you know where you are?

Do you remember your name? Hello? Is that sound familiar to you? And it's like you can't say "hey, fuck you buddy, I know what's going on here, I know this is a-" oh my god, I just remembered the most awkward moment of my life, it was a real humiliation to the highest level. What is it? This is something I still reflect on from time to time and feel very ashamed of myself. It was in college, I was having really severe anxiety in college, like generalized anxiety disorder that really affected my function. It's mostly okay now I still have a lot of anxiety, but they used to be like when I was really bad in college.

I couldn't function properly and I didn't like having a normal conversation with someone. I felt like I was a rock or something. So I walked in, my housemates' friend was sitting in the kitchen and she was eating like Burger King - I don't know what the fuck - and I walked in and they said, "Hey Ethan, what's up?" And at that moment, I had like deja vu, just random, so I said hello, and I looked at her and I said, "Has this happened before?" Look at her with the craziest eyes like "has this happened before?" What I wanted to say is like "oh, weird, I had deja vu," but she looks at me like "no, I don't think so..." and in my mind I know exactly what's going on.

I'm crazy, she thinks I'm crazy, I just didn't communicate, that's all that happened. -It just scared her. And now, because he was so anxious, she left, and I said, "Okay, bye." I just left and from that day on I'm sure I saw that girl many times. -Yeah? While she was still living in Santa Cruz, she thought I was crazy and I never had a chance to explain it to her. Because what are you going to do? Hey, remember that day I know you remember I just said something really weird and you thought I was crazy? Yes, well I just want to explain it to you.

I just want to explain it to you. Look, it's even crazier. Has this happened before? That? Guys, remember this the next time you choke. Have I been here before? Has this happened before? Just say that and go. Ethan, stand up and tell us about yourself. "Has this happened before?" and then just leave. What a classy outing, everyone is going to be riding your cock all year round. So, as promised, let's give that dunnie away, folks. We've been working on a big batch of dunnies for the holiday season and realized we could sell them, but we could make something even cooler and maybe you guys are familiar with the beers, did I say that right?

The diamond beer company. Well, apparently diamonds aren't that rare, but they control their release, which makes them more valuable. Do you know where I want to go with Hila? She is like diamonds. Dunney Diamond Boys. We have 50 Dunneys. 50 of them that Hila has been making for Christmas and we said that she has more prize value per month, one month and she gives away a Dunney and no one will be able to buy them, man. This is the only place that now has a special award, right? You can't buy it anymore. Before, I mean, you can get it. -You can get it but you can't buy it, guys.

And I really find a lot of charm in that. -I like it too. I thought because... -It makes the award that much more special. You're going to eat, we're going to post, you're going to be great, you're going to get a Dunney type. Have you ever felt alone? Have you ever been sad? Have you ever been depressed? You want to stick your cock in a fleshy pink hole. Well, we've got you covered. Well, who is the winner? Alright guys! We have our first golden Dunney rubble style winner. Cassandra Cell Wow! Yeah! Thanks for sharing and supporting.

We love you so much. Thank you. Please appreciate this Dunney. I really appreciate it. And we have 50 more to give away one a month, guys. It's going to be crazy, maybe at Christmas we can do something special like giving away three. Christmas show. Anyway, guys, this is also the time of the month when we should give a big thank you to everyone who supported us on Patreon and who made such a huge impact on our lives. It's really amazing. It makes a big difference. People are really generous. The generosity of the people is amazing. Honestly, I can't believe it.

Yes, I think it will inspire me to be a more generous person because it makes me feel like a fucking idiot. I never help people much. What the fuck friend. Guys, thanks for watching. Thanks for being with us. We love you so much. Thanks for your support. And I'm going to fuck Dunney, so I don't know what Hila is going to do. Peace guys. Thank you, I love you, until next time. Bye bye.