Podcast #83 - Honest Company Slogans

I also laughed because every time we watched Shark Tank we always left because Robert always manages to top every episode he likes. He tries really hard to develop a relationship with the pitcher and is very nice and always ends up trying to make a deal but then they outbid him or they join in and it's like poor Robert none of the participants chose, yeah , never get picked even when you have a great deal they like to pick other people with the same deal, like if one of the Sharks took your deal and then made it their deal, yeah the person would be like done deal and then it's like but it is and then it cuts in his face and he is always alone.

Like he's God, Michael Jordan's face likes to perpetuate it because he's a little petulant, he likes to get offended by things when people ask him questions or when one of the other sharks takes a little jab at him. He's really going to like being sad and it's like, wait, dude, you've got it like you've got thicker skin, you're a shark, like he's so sweet, John, a bit of a slut. Julian will start to have a good laugh because it happens in every episode as in all of them. one time so funny ah well you know at least Daymond created FUBU that's what I'm saying it's cool 15 years ago what happened sounds like Sean John yeah it's exactly like Sean John it's like I feel so bad for people that Judy ever time you burned Von Dutch so fashion changes is what you asked for a couple of these really popular brands they like really popular and then all of a sudden everyone's like, yeah, we don't win anymore, remember those trucker caps, you work so well Yes I had a Von Dutch.

I had a pair of Von Dutch jeans that were thin like a giant patch embroidered on the back when it said Von Dutch, but they were beautiful jeans and I had them for years and they were amazing. I loved them. I'm not sure, I have to check this with my mom or something or in my diary and you keep a diary, but I'm pretty sure I had a fake Von Dutch hat, they say it's cute, you sleep, yeah, like somewhere moment you had to stop using it. because people are allowed to make sugata tendencies just go away and it seems crazy for it to happen that way, but that's like it's so cool and now it's not so ruthless, ruthless, wild, wild, wild, a mean girl where you got a next girl okay KFC chicken we think we question the odds brutal brutal man from Mars brutal Mars Wow if you don't like my puns get out of the pun kitchen Wow

podcast

er only B's name is Wow, oh by the way, I have in one of my taglines there a quote from the office and you have to guess what it is, but I know I can't even believe that someone watched or listened to our

podcast

last week, like this that I'm talking about Pham, that's ridiculous, that was just me, like I'm frustrated because you live.

I was living I was living like a fool Oleg is amazing Oh goal almost as fun as Disneyland at a third of the price oh that's actually true. I think I had a goal too. Do you want to hear my goal? A goal, oh we can. I don't go to Walmart, okay, but Target is a fun place to be, I just like it, I don't like it when we want to embarrass ourselves, just go kill time, go look around, yeah, sing some music, walk when I was dating him before making a video and we went to Toys R Us and Targeter.

I think we went to a lot of places where he went to Toys R Us, uh, yeah, and he was like, "Let's go get a PP" and I was like, it's a PP, it's like a pointless purchase, so you're like, oh Oh my god, something stupid and then you'll be inspired like it's me just by being in an environment with a lot of things you've never seen before, yeah, the goal is great for patients with mindless anxieties. Do you know which chain I am? I'm Shan Shan is the lyrics leave me well, so next time I don't want anyone to be offended.

I get offended, okay, if you attend this specific institution, don't be offended by this because I joke and I have many friends who go there, but it is well known that this is how it is, so here is Planet Fitness, no dead lives allowed, but we do have pizza parties every Friday because they don't allow deadlifts and that's my favorite lift of all. Once they don't allow it, they literally don't allow deadlifting if they see you deadlifting. I've seen a lot of stories everywhere, mostly on the fitness subreddit, but in many places indoors you can't deadlift at Planet Fitness, even if you're not hitting the weight hard on the floor.

Why it is a judgment-free zone. It's too noisy. I don't know, they have their reasons, but yeah, I mean, once you don't allow deadlifts, you're not a gym, oh oh oh, yeah. That's why I'm making that joke because I mean, maybe they do now, but I know they are. I say it with the barbell, if you did it with free weights, you would deadlift like dumbbells, yes, after not touching. the floor but they don't want the weight to touch the floor I don't know I don't know the reasoning I don't know the exact rules and I also know they have pizza parties at Planet Fitness that doesn't make sense Yeah I mean like I said I'm not judging if you go there, that's great.

I heard a lot of people, you meet a lot of friends, go there and keep playing for everyone. Yes, I need to do my deadlifts and I like it too. It's a strange principle to ban a certain lift because I feel like it's directly related to your judgment-free zone, like you just assume that everyone who deadlifts is just a troglodyte throwing weights around when in reality it's like he's a great work out, yeah, with the barbell and the weights touch the floor and you can do it quietly without offending anyone, yeah, oh, you know what I bet, if I went there and did some deadlifts quietly, maybe someone who wouldn't He would tell me nothing, but yes I went in there and put five plates on both sides and started deadlifting.

They'd kick you out so fast. I mean, do you feel intimidated? It doesn't mean that just because you deadlift heavier you'd get in trouble and I wouldn't, that's stronger. Strength, this is totally strength, Astone Lee, because you're lifting too much weight to be a plant, yeah, that's a judgement, yeah, it's time to judge, you're supposed to be the judgment-free zone, we're supposed to be able to walk. in underwear all over Planet Fitness and not be judged, especially if it's from Mandy. I'm supposed to be able to get in, that's me. Any penis and immortal what I want, penis without shoes Ditka, I will go but and I will eat mousse on Friday.

Most of all I should be dead, oh my underwear and no, like you missed it, you missed it, you missed it. I totally make that transition and you were busy saying penis knees. I know they understood that I don't have a penis, but yes. I did it, I'd be on my self Andes, oh you don't know Wow, don't you ever make that comment and that noise in a row again, the guys bought me Andy's sexiest underwear in the game right now, everyone has, seriously , they come up with new designs every Every month they have different designers that come in and design these really cool pieces for all of their underwear and you can go online and ask me about these calm down and see the selection, it's really cool and once you use your first Dude, you understand what it is.

It means that when they say it's a micro model fabric, literally twice as soft as cotton, you don't understand what that means until you put them on and you feel exceptional, you're missing everything you're missing, there it is, keep it up. I can hear you okay yeah so guys look at me and he walks up to me and it's M e undies calm / Jana Julian get 20% off your first order and then take a picture of your underwear no take a photo on your cell phone or maybe just a photo on the table and tweet us because we love when you guys do that, that's awesome too guys.

I can't stress enough how amazing this

company

as a whole is, they really put a lot of time and effort and their profits into fighting human trafficking, which is something that is an issue that a lot of people just don't like. think why it's so horrible, right, but sorry, the Borland branch really focuses on that, they are mother. -Y-pop, they treat their workers amazingly and have products that give you high quality at affordable prices and in my opinion, when you buy things from a

company

, half the time I buy something from them and "I'm thinking about what represents the company, so if the company is great customer service, I'm proud to buy things from them if they have a good image or if they donate to a good charity.

I'm proud to buy things from For them it's not just about the products. by experience and the Boleyn branch has you completely covered. I have a conscience, they have a conscience and they cut out the middlemen. I don't know if you still want to go to the store to buy sheets but that's old news, send it directly to your house eliminate. go to the middle man with Bowl and Branch check it out right now see their selection go to Bowl and Branch comm enter product code Jenna Julian and you'll get 20% off and by the way those sheets are so soft next level butter net they are butter you sleep in butter and maybe you wake up all greasy just kidding okay but thanks to our sponsors sorry I missed the transition because I wasn't expecting I wasn't I'm done letting Jenna you're done telling her this anyway mmm de who's my term I'm talking about, but not our bowl and branch sheets that they're always saying in bed, but the sheets we got at the next place Bath and Beyond, not beyond, I paid a penny for those and they're not agents, you know your buds are supposed to get softer when you wash them and you know what golem branch, yeah, but they're the ones I like, I paid a lot. of money because they are high thread count or whatever I feel like not getting softer they are only getting Tanner so Bed Bath & Beyond should have gone to the balloon brand is that they are slow yeah yeah Alright.

Bed Bath & Beyond for all your needs and non-needs, but once you're here, what is this, oh my god, what is that? Also Christopher Walken once worked here, remember that and click, yes you have the click log. I'm doing a good office. references don't give me a high five with that little finger look little friend fing go touch it I'm going to take them and I'm just going to squeeze them until you feel it you're going to hurt my hurt thing give it to me I'm going to bring my finger, oh she loves it take your arms like a dog's and he does this thing where you pretend, then he says this is not like that.

I have to go mmm and I pretend I'm going to make that noise because I'm sick. I'm too aesthetic, I like what you do, it took me because you just stand there like that's going to cut it, put a little lock on the wrist in mm-hm, push the water still for some reason, oh my God, how Is it the company that does that? I think it's Gatorade, there's a gay day, oh no, I've seen it on the shelf recently and I'm wondering how this is still a thing, yeah, it's disgusting and if I'm going to like it, if I'm really going to like it, take the dive in and sacrifice sugar and carbs for a drink that I will have at some point, so there are a lot of times that I love Gatorade like intense workout types, hangovers, I love Gator, but why would I go that far and then try something ? like a propeller, it's just so yeah, if you're hungover and then you drink like a hickey, oh my god, it brings you back to life, yeah, it makes you feel alive again and live again and then love, commit and so, That's why you committed to me, committed.

For me, that's great in English, are you ready for the next one? Don't aim at me. Okay, Home Depot, we're open late because we know you underestimated your project. That's good. It's super real. I feel so real. I mean, you always run. I came back for two nuts and bolts, yes Hammer Home Depot, we're open late because we know you didn't get any of the things you were supposed to get the first time. Also, we have cold baths, that should be part of what I was in. I thought we had minutes, please don't do it in Florida, my God, that's talking about hot pockets.

Wow, it tears the palate, yes, right, the diarrhea pocket is dead. The package is Jim Gaffigan, yes, did you notice that he became a colonel and KFC, just? They changed it, yeah, they just changed it again, it was the other community, yeah, yeah, normal, okay, so I don't know, yeah, so I think it's Norma Donald and they would like it to be new, but then they don't they felt, they got Jim. Gaffigan, so the place they made was Jim Gaffigan, you know, it's Norma Donald, right? and then it cuts, Jim Gaffigan has the colonel waking up and I say I had a bad dream, there was another colonel pretending to be me, so meta, so meta, but yeah, I loved Gavin lounge in his part Hot Pockets it's so funny, you should watch it on YouTube ever, guys, dad, David Packard, yeah, he's the best, okay, I bought a supermarket chop from Whole Foods like there was no tomorrow because you definitely won't have any money left when you leave mmm they put, they call a full paycheck people have your limp a jacket no turkish yeah it's so real surreal okay we've talked about this on a podcast before though about how on the west coast because people don't No I have to deal with it orplay with her so she's eating so she wants to eat her, yeah oh my gosh that just reminded me.

You loved the snake of her, although oh, I know she hides better. My sister, a boa constrictor. I loved her, she was so. Sweet, they are so sweet. I reminded myself of this subreddit I recently discovered and it's tough, but if you're in the tough world, go to it. It's called nature is metal. There was a video of this piranha eating this mouse. oh my gosh, like they're basically animals to each other, that's probably not for me, it is for me, but sometimes I literally have to turn it off because it's like sacred nature is metal, it's called nature metal, why what can you imagine?

Yeah, okay, Sherman, we use cute bears for advertising. paper for your anus oh that's right, their ads are cute, although I like what they want you to think at the end of the day, you're buying paper for your bubble, yes, but since when do bears use toilet paper, I don't. age, they just like rubbing their butt against a tree, they don't feel it much, they should love that when they are standing against something it's a lady,

honest

ly it's a great way to slap your back if you stand against something and just rub it the back. it feels so good oh I get you bears, I get you, dude, that's why every time I see a bear doing that, I just rub myself a little real quick.

I think, dude, you get that advantage mmm Kleenex, oh, nasty Kleenex, you nasty, that's funny, uh, yeah, you lose the Kleenex. Make fun of my room, oh my god. oh nasty hmm-hmm achoo oh nasty it's cool everywhere except at a funeral no I'm just going to say that like you're crying janessa oh nasty we're here to remember oh nasty omg , oh, where, and Now you're being insensitive, disgusting insensitive. I'm sorry, how was I in? I was at a funeral sponsored by Kleenex and I didn't like it. Sorry, Figueroa sponsored by Kleenex. Hey, someone has to cover those costs.

Murals are not cheap. right, right, let's not talk about pianos, I mean, yeah, that was really dark, nice, sorry Nike, just do it and unless you like it, you don't really want to do it, in which case just post a picture of yourself doing it and then, like, hug and watch Netflix or something, but get your mom's password, don't pay for it, those shoes cost you too much now they cost you, they cost you because they harassed you, they harassed you. Wow, I have a Wow, what's not funny, no, it's so true, although I'm not going to sleep tonight.

I have one. It looks something like this yeah, no, no, I said I have one, yeah, nothing, all set, I said next one, okay, turn on New Balance, hey, you know, we do good things too, just because we don't have celebrities and We don't have outfits like we need clothes. you make fantastic shoes, hey, we exist, that's good, you should know about it, really, you should know about science, it should be New Balance worn by dads everywhere New Balance, hey, we exist to new limits, if you need a review of our shoes, just ask your dad, dad, if you have wide feet, it's okay, I got it, New Balance dad, Nessie, Utah, I have one more, okay Joey, you make a pair, do you have one? , do you have more than me?

Duff primary key alert, why doesn't Duff like printing boxes with just keys? on it, some key soap would be great, it's great and it's Crate and Barrel, congratulations, when is the wedding good? Who really goes to Crate & Barrel and just shops? No, it's the registration place, yeah, okay, I'll do my lesson and then Bank of America. I'm sorry, but I'm not sorry, oh don't get me started on them, they make me mad, they'll be like we're like, hey, we actually saw this purchase at a gas station like 20 feet from your house, but you haven't . gone there in 30 minutes cancel monocle you get a new one in five to seven business days if you're lucky if you're lucky until then good luck that's my worst thing I like member the time we went to the supermarket and it was just I canceled on the spot and then I called them and they asked me: did you still try to go to Ralph's?

Human, you bought, you thought it was fraud anyway and the worst part is I heard my who have other banks and they say oh yeah, when I get a suspicious purchase they literally call me or text me like, "Okay , great, you didn't trust that the US boom was cancelled." you first and then they charge you if you want your card sent faster, yes I remember, I don't think they do that anymore but overdraft fees make you a member, no no they do, oh yeah I thought someone I had won a class action law, so I grew up.

They refunded me some money because what they were doing was: it was wrong. They may have put you on different feet, but they still do it with traffic. It's like you spend a dollar because when I was younger I used to overdraw sometimes and then it was because you spent a dollar more than here and you could charge like 15 on your current checking account and then they would charge you which is crazy . crazy and it wouldn't stop you from overspending or saying "hey we're overcharging right now" it just lets you go you know so if you say no I know I know you don't have a coffee and then you went and I got a sandwich that would then be like Oh almost okay $6,100 well I don't know about a hundred dollars for two purchases but it depends on everything except the two cafes where we know yeah but yeah it's up it's criminal oh Did you have anything else? yeah Snickers we basically own the copyright to Hangry, oh are you sad because you're hanging?

No, I was making a joke, but now you don't even laugh at my jokes, what joke was an office job, Jonna, you know, you know I win, I. I'm not going to read them all, what does the tagline say? Yeah, okay, it's the Snickers one, no, is it Nike? Okay, I won't let you go on the list, it was Pinkberry. I can't believe there are no calories in this. Wow. They're walking through the mall, frozen yogurt, and Michael says, I can't believe this has no calories, and as it goes, no one said it had no calories, right, oh wait, no, it was Pam, I'm sorry, it was Pam. live she loves it thank you for putting up with this podcast like Jenna did.

I think she's done putting up with it, but um, oh, sorry, I should go check her box, folks. I fell asleep from laughing so much at that. nice reference yeah go see me ideas go meet nice calm / Jenna Julian to get 20% off your order of the softest and best underwear in the game and go to Bull and Branch Comm enter the code of Jenna Julian product to get 20% off the best. sheets, bedding and everything else you can get and ship directly to your home at affordable prices thanks to our sponsors, yes, thank you all, thank you for stopping by another week, yes, you believe that we appreciate you and we always make sure to know it.

Well, if you have an idea, tweet us, yes, Jenna Julian Potter on Twitter, because if we're anything like this week, we'll find your idea and make a pocket. I'll find it, I'll read it, and we'll laugh about it. That's exactly right, oh you. the boys made me ink Oh, I can't wait to find ink, see Dory find ink, ink, ink inside her. I know, I hope we still look alike. Never a new door photo of me next to Dory, we lose that, yeah, you're dressed like a blue. t-shirt yes I want to be Dory when I grow up be dory 42 Wallaby waits t-shirt yes it's okay anyway thank you all for watching and we don't know anymore oh I know right have a great week thanks for watching yeah, bye guys, you