Obama's Anger Management Translator Speaks the Truth

Honestly, what they say doesn't bother me. I understand that we have an adversarial system. I'm a gentle guy and that's why I invited Luther, my

anger

translator

, to join me here tonight. Grab your Lily white butts on our fast. Changing global traditions, like the White House Correspondence Dinner, matter. I mean, what is this dinner really and why should I attend it? Jeff Bush, do you really want to do this? Because despite our differences we count on the press to shed light on the situation. Today's biggest issues and we can count on Fox News to terrify old white men with some nonsense.

Shere L is coming to Cleveland Run for the damn hills. You all are ridiculous, we won't always see you, oh, and we will see there, thank you very much. For the wall, all the Ebola coverage for two whole weeks, we were one step away from Walking Dead and then everyone got up and moved on to the next day, that was incredible. Oh, and by the way, if you haven't noticed it, don't do it. I don't have Ebola, but I still deeply appreciate the work you do. Everyone remembers when I had that big hole in the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico and then I covered it up.

Remember what Obama's Katrina was, that was 19. It's 20 because I can't, I don't remember, protecting our democracy is more important than ever, for example, the Supreme Court ruled that the donor who gave Ted Cruz $6 million alone I was exercising freedom of speech, yes, it's the kind of speech like this. she wasted $6 million and it's not just the republicans Hillary will also have to spend huge sums of money oh yes she will get that money she will get all the money kisi will come to Westeros watch out the continued focus on billionaire donors creates real problems for our democracy and that's why we're running for a third term no, no, no, no, no, no, no, who the hell said that, but we need to stay focused on some big challenges like climate change.

Hey, listen up everyone. They haven't realized that California is completely dry. It looked like a trailer for Matt Max's new movie. Everyone thought Bradley Cooper came here because he wanted to talk to Chuck Todd. He needed a glass of water. Come on, science. It's clear, the science is clear. Nine of the 10 warmest years on record occurred in the last decade. Now I'm not a scientist, but I do know how to count up to 10 rising seas. More violent storms, mosquitoes, sweaty people on the train, sinking it. above, it's just disgusting, I mean, look at us, look at what's happening right now.

All serious scientists say we must act. The Pentagon says it is a national security risk. Miami floods on a sunny day and to do something about it we have elected officials. Throwing snowballs in the Senate is okay, okay sir, okay, I think they got it, brother, it's crazy, what's wrong with our kids? What kind of stupid, short-sighted, irresponsible bull? an

anger

translator

, you need a counselor. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm out of here, man, I'm trying to get into all this.