Hot Chocolate 3 Ways - You Suck at Cooking (episode 82)

♪ You

suck

at

cooking

, yes, you totally

suck

♪ It's a myth that hot

chocolate

is called 'hot

chocolate

' because it involves bringing the chocolate to a high temperature. The truth is that hot chocolate means using 'chocolate hawt'. That's why it's important to start with the chocolate that seems spiciest to you. For this first cocoa powder-based hot chocolate, you might consider a tattooed barista hot cocoa powder or a can of lumbersexual hot cocoa powder. I'll use a scoop (15ml, about 5g) of each to combine the best of the coffee brewing experience with the ability to look rugged without having any idea how to operate a chainsaw.

First I'm heating up a cup of milk but making sure not to boil it... ...not exactly like that. Once it's hot, mixing the cocoa will be a breeze. If the milk is cold, you'll be in hell trying to mix it, which is ironic because hell isn't cold, it's hot. It's full of fire, brimstone and shit, so you'll want to try to avoid it. The whisk is a great tool for maximum disintegration. I'm adding a pinch of salt to reduce the bitterness and enhance the flavor of everything all the time. I'm adding 3 teaspoons (15 ml; 20 g) of honey to sweeten it.

Check it out for W.A.B.S. then adjust the sweetness and chocolate to your taste. Don't let MAN tell you how sweet or chocolatey you should have your hot chocolate. Let me tell you instead. 3 teaspoons of honey. mmm... That's a really good cup of hot chocolate/cocoa. For hot chocolate number two, I have some artistic hot semi-sweet baking chocolate and some hot intellectual semi-sweet baking chocolate that allows us to infuse the drink with beautiful ideas, stimulating thoughts, and the ability to speak with an aggressively abstract and obnoxious confidence. We will put 4 to 6 squares of that semisweet chocolate.

We'll just heat that milk... Let's ignore that boiling again... For me this is now complete. It's pretty sweet. Tastes good. You may want a little brown sugar, half to a full teaspoon (3-5 ml or grams). Then, I'm going to dazzle this with 1/8 teaspoon (0.6 ml; 200 mg) of ginger powder. If you don't like amazing things, I recommend not adding ginger because this is very good. Mmmmmmmmmm... It's a very fine hot chocolate. If you're not interested in making homemade hot chocolate, you can get a package at the store. Simply mix it with boiling water. Then pour it into your bottle, get into your crib and read a nice story. :) "Once upon a time there was a boy who wanted to make hot chocolate", "But he was too afraid to prepare the ingredients himself." "So he made it from a package." "And instead of growing up," "he spent his entire life being a very, very big baby." "And then he realized that he just had a fetish for adult babies." "And he found a couple who totally liked him and they lived happily ever after, free from society's judgment." The end.

For the third hot chocolate, which is a deep, mysterious and complex hot chocolate, we have hawt surfer 85% dark chocolate and hawt raver 85% dark chocolate. This combines two of the best athletes in the world: the surfer is more of an explosive energy athlete, while the raver is an endurance athlete. But what's better than these two hawt chocolates? The most delicious chocolate of all: chocolate that is simply being itself. The chocolate whose identity is not based on how big a wave it can surf, what subgenre of minimalist technology it can identify, how many ideas of Nietzsche it can articulate, how resilient it looks.

It's just chocolate, it doesn't have to be anything other than chocolate. Just kidding, lazy, develop a style and be cool like the rest of the uhh, other people who have figured out how to do that... without trying too hard. Or not... I'm not sure. We take 3 squares of 85%, 1 cup (240 ml) of milk, 2 or 3 teaspoons (10-15 ml; 15-20 g) of maple syrup, a couple of drops of vanilla, and salt again. This is a good hot chocolate if you want to tell other people that they probably don't have the palate to enjoy something so sophisticated. Mmmm, what good hot chocolate.

And now you have to make an important decision. Should you put marshmallows in your hot chocolate? The answer is simple. Look inside your heart, think about what you like and then say NO, you shouldn't do it. The reason is that marshmallows are objectively bad. They're actually just a trick because the marshmallows float. It's like bubble tea in reverse. And if you think marshmallows are good, let's do a quick comparison with other sweet things. Marshmallows versus jujubes Marshmallows versus Sour Keys Marshmallows versus chocolate covered almonds Marshmallows versus Stroopwafel Marshmallows versus Old Man Mints Marshmallows versus a shot of molasses Marshmallows versus pizza dough Marshmallows versus honey-dipped Powerstone marshmallows versus a sponge with sugar sprinkled on top I think I get my point. period, but just to be a good sport I'm going to- Yeah, no, totally wrong.

Marshmallows are great with a classic hot chocolate. But keep them away from the other two hot chocolates. Have some dignity, will you? Or not. Just put marshmallows on everything, why not? In any case, this hot chocolate will help you get through the winter. Or if you live in a hot place, it can also help you overcome the winter of your discontent. Make the most of those negative feelings and resolve them with the delicious taste of homemade hot chocolate. Mmmmm... MMmmm... Mmm... MMMMMMM ♪ It's getting a little freezing outside as I feel the grip of the cold ♪ ♪ I have to keep everything warm here as winter begins to take hold ♪ ♪ Winter draws closer as the temperature plummets and you know the snow is coming ♪ ♪ I can wrap up all I want but there's only one thing to warm my insides ♪ ♪ Well, hot chocolate, I want it ♪ ♪ I pick up a bug and put it in my pocket ♪ ♪ I have to be careful when I'm not walking ♪ ♪ Because that's how you burn your pants ♪ ♪ Walking with a chocolate stain on my crisp white pants and it's not even spring ♪ ♪ The seasons pass and my cravings increase because winter is coming Quick, I have to warm my insides ♪ ♪ Fight the cold, take a big sip, put it on your lips, hot chocolate, I can't stop it ♪ ♪ A force to be reckoned with, the best of drinks ♪ ♪ Open your throat and throw away the contents ♪ ♪ Warm up everything inside you with that melted chocolate ♪ ♪ Yes ♪ Mmm.

Hmm. HMM.