"Guptas In Jacob Zuma's Ear The Whole Time" - Trevor Noah - (There's A Gupta On My Stoep)

You know, the worst thing for me about the Guptas, apart from the blatant corruption and state capture, would have to be the fact that I felt betrayed by my presidents. I will tell you why I felt betrayed because I am not naïve enough to believe that there will ever be no corruption in a society. Very good, and as South Africans we must also recognize that corruption and governance go hand in hand. I know it seems like a pessimistic view, but it is true all over the world. Don't be fooled by first world countries, where they go as if they had no corruption.

I don't care if it's Australia, I don't care if it's Canada, there is corruption. They just found ways to legalize it. They have found ways to obscure, there is corruption, but the difference is that we need to get better at functional corruption. Our corruption is extreme guys. We received a tender for 10 bridges and we didn't build anything. No guys. Build nine, steal one. At least make some progress. Now there is no bridge. "Man, what happened to the bridge?" "It was supposed to be there, imagine. Imagine it was there." "What are you talking about?" "No, it's the thought that counts, don't worry." You are robbing yourselves when you are that corrupt man.

We have to work to be better, that's what broke my heart. Because I don't know to what extent it is true or not. What I do know is that if Jacob Zuma was allowing the Guptas to control our country and elect our ministers, then it wasn't my president who was corrupt to me, it was the Guptas who told him what to do. It's like Julius said: "The Guptas were in his ear all the

time

. They were in his ear all the

time

." And you know the way Julius sounded, it sounded incredible because I understand the phrase when they say, "They were in his ear," but he said, "They were in his ear." It sounded like the Guptas were really within Jacob Zuma's ear, which actually would have made sense if you think about it.

What if they were in his ear all the time? How do we know that every time Jacob Zuma spoke to us as a nation, he was actually telling us what the Guptas were telling him? Like he had one of those headphones they have on those hidden camera shows, you know? As if he was there in the parliament, outside the parliament, there was a van with a Gupta sitting inside. "Hello, Jacob. Jacob? Jacob? I activated your headset. You're going to repeat everything I say, okay? Jacob, Jacob? Can you hear me, Jacob? Can you hear me?" "Received, received, received." "No, no, it's Atul.

This is Atul, Jacob." "I know who it is, guys. I got it. I know who it is." "Okay, let's make sure all the levels are correct, Jacob. One, two, one, two, one, two." "Okay, what do you want to do?" "No, no, one, two like three. One, two like three. One, two like three." "Oh, okay, okay. I have you guys. So I have to repeat everything you say?" "Yes, you're going to repeat everything, Jacob." "Okay, this is going to be really complicated. Me, trying to listen to you while I talk." "We understand Jacob but we, you know, we've already made a plan, you and us, so repeat everything I say, okay?" "Okay, I'll repeat everything." And that's probably why things went wrong, because I don't know if you've ever tried to listen to someone while they're talking to someone else.

Your mind gets stuck. Yes, that is why Jacob Zuma never got to make a speech. It's not that he didn't know how to read, he didn't know how to listen. He couldn't listen and speak at the same time. I used to look at it and say, "What's going on, Jacob? Your YouTube is buffering. What's going on here? That's why the data must be dropping." But it turns out he was listening the

whole

time. There he was in parliament, the praise singer pronounced his name as he arrived, (singing in a foreign language) Jacob Zuma took the podium.

His headset was ready. "Good afternoon everyone." "Good afternoon everyone." "Proud South Africans", "Proud South Africans", "and especially the Indians". "And the Indians, especially." "We are doing well in this country." "We are doing well in this country." "And don't listen to the new either--" "Don't listen to "the newspaper." "the newspapers." "Although what they say," "Although what they say, "is correct." "he's right", "sometimes". "sometimes." "Also, there is no problem with the ANC." "Also, there are no problems with the ANC." "Membership is growing." "Membership is growing." "Currently we have 939 million, 360 thousand--" "939 thousand", "no, no, 39 million, 39", "39 million", "63", "and 62", "No, no 39, 390 million" . , 600", "390", "No, I said nine hundred... "900 million", "62,000, sixty", "62,000", "No, Jacob, you're missing the point." One hundred", "Millions". "Millions". "No, Jacob, Jacob, come on man, listen well." "Listen well." "Listen, listen well.

Listen well." "No, Jacob, listen, listen." "Listen, listen well." "900 million." "900 million." "Give me a pen there, give me a pen there." "No, Jacob, Jacob, 100 million, 39, 39." "39 million", "63 thousand--" "63,000." (cough) "What are you doing? Jacob, no man, that was just a tickle and a cough." hehe hehe... hehe hehe "Okay, this is going bad Jacob. Abort, abort Jacob, abort." "I bought." They were in his ear the

whole

time.