Every Morning Routine Ever

It's all good because this virtue is the store, yes, merchandise in the store, we're all stuck inside and we missed the outdoors, wait, don't think about that, stop reading about it, yes, there's a lot of the company of the store, cute and great in the shower. I mean what I am, miss human size, rich in the storm, you stagger in the store, oh, I'm late, okay, look, who decided to show up? You're late for the cafe, sorry guys, what's up man? Ah, there it is. Oh my dad actually asked about you the other day um he wants to know if he can have his ugly 70's button up shirt yeah did you get that shirt from ugly shirts for quiet idiots take this off your body take it off it's embarrassing I miss them guys, do I miss you?

I miss you too friend, now take off that shirt

ever

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morning

routine

, always good

morning

, dusk, not dawn, organize your bedtime, well time is just an illusion, Frank and you were just my jealous neighbor, now eat your dinner and let me sing you good morning. Look what you did Frank, you ruined me, old, angry, divorced, I'm sorry, I miss my wife, oh no, I accidentally hit snooze twelve times, why are there so many songs with woke lyrics today? Okay, dear Satan, please give me the power to win. my enemies amen good morning today is a normal day that cowards no police before the hour and a half of waking up grab a brush and I put on some perfect makeup

ever

y morning when I wake up I salute the sun for 30 minutes straight it's a joke, I don't I believe in Satan, dear Instagram, please make my followers like it enough so I don't have to drown in all the weird milk I bought at Trader Joe's.

Well first I chase my coffee with an espresso and then I drink a cold drink with a straw made of coffee beans to our neighbor bill you've been putting beer in my water Benny dog ​​- you're sober that's not right yeah - pay the bill No water, but I'm flirting with Dylan I'm drinking a beer Thank you very much for the suggestion that you don't need to do that Oh, I'm not going to leave Bill on Oh no, no, yes, yes, I'm right, King, to flirt with you, a message to the early risers from the night owls, enough, just enough, good morning halfway. city ​​commuters here's your traffic update for your morning commute there's a small backup right outside the bathroom a Sigalert in the kitchen expect delays while you try to find a clean spoon so you don't eat cereal and even more delays when you realize you don't Did it charge your laptop last night expect a five minute delay in your commute while your computer completely reboots Hi Danny, can you stop narrating everything I'm doing?

Is very annoying. I can not do this. I'm sorry, I was fired from work. season this week and this is the only thing keeping me safe now sit back and relax and enjoy some me me me me no no no you haven't ruined the perfect bowl of cereal okay, thanks, it's just powdered milk okay, just know it's going to rehydrate back into the milk or it's going to be crunchy my cereals crunchy my milk can be crunchy okay, okay, yeah, that's good. I can't start the day without showering, drinking my coffee, exercising every day. Just kidding I deleted my Instagram dear internet please give me some news that doesn't make me want to stay in bed all day just kidding I'm not religious can you hear me?

I said maybe I'm not religious have you ever tried a coffee enema it wakes you up good I set my alarm and I'm going to make sure I can't hit the snooze button while I'm sleeping. Yes, it is not possible to press the snooze button from there. Curse my incredible archery skills. I have to greet all the neighbors every morning. exactly the same order and if not, someone is being bitten, the world is still on fire, everything is wrong. I'll be honest, I'm not entirely sure what smooth jazz is, so here's a new genre of music I just invented, it's called center trumpet, she microdosed me.

If they were dosing me, that's legal in most states, probably not Virginia, although dear people of the world, please stop asking how tall I am and if I'm taller than 6 feet and if I play basketball, I played center once and I shot at the wrong hoop during a game my mom watched she didn't talk to me the whole way home well I mean this watercress like I'm missing breathing a liquid yeah better than Christmas dinner this bed with a knife getting dinner session this is better than st. St. Patrick's Day dinner, damn, you won't even know she made a st.

St. Patrick's Day, I'm Irish, no I'm NOT, do you want something, yes I do, look you made it to the end of the video. I just want to give your cheeks a good pinch because you made it to the end. I'm going to give you a little gift of that video right there, oh my gosh, you should click on it right now and if you don't want to click on it, if you've already seen it, have you seen our new merch? We have some interesting things, this is not new. but I think it's still in stock if you want to check it out other than that good night.