What Everyone Struggling Needs to Know Right Now | Ed Mylett on Impact Theory

when I'm training I always do an extra rep an extra set because it's a promise that I kept to myself and here's the most important thing is a pattern it's a pattern that I keep I always do a little more I always do a little more inches and the place more Quick and easy to do it is the gym because I can always grab one more weight, one more set and read

what

it does, it changes its identity. Everyone is welcome to

impact

, be on target with this program and the company presents them. to the people and ideas that will help you execute your dreams.

Today's guest went from bankruptcy and having to shower in a public pool to building his own business and a net worth in the hundreds of millions of dollars. Today he is recognized as one of the world's greatest business leaders, but initially his dream was to be a professional baseball player and he was well on his way when a career-ending injury crushed his dreams in an instant. He lost all motivation and drive, but luckily his father is a recovering alcoholic. who understands the power of effort refused to let him give up on his life and got him a job at a group home for disadvantaged and abused children.

Seeing the positive

impact

he was able to have on the lives of these children, a light went on in his Mind you, he discovered that being useful fueled him far more than success in baseball, so when an opportunity with World Financial Group presented itself, he approached it with an attitude of service rather than greed, and this change in perspective ended up making everything The difference was a journey full of incredible and absolutely desperate ups and downs, but because he had the powerful desire to help and serve, as well as provide for his own family, he persevered and eventually turned his business into a huge success, becoming one of the youngest CEOs.

MDS in the company's history and from there continued to grow, building one of the most successful and inspiring national teams of associates in wfg's history, a track record of success that led him to be named president of the agency, in addition to being recognized around the world as a top acting expert who has equal parts love and incredibly high standards, so please help me welcome the man who has a child pointing to a beautiful cliff overlooking the sea and said one day I'm going to live there and now he's heading into my lap. I am so happy to be here.

It's amazing to have you here. I've been a fan of yours for a long time, so the honors matter a lot to me. Yeah, researching you was a lot of fun and that's really why I'm here. Bring a guest or not, it's really amazing

what

you've done to your way of thinking and it gives us chills just thinking about asking this question, okay, there's a Malcolm X quote that you really like, tell me what it is and why what you don't hate is so powerful, eventually you will tolerate it and I think that identifies most people's lives;

In other words, the average becomes like this slow suffocation, it's almost like an anesthetic and over time you would become immune and dull. to the average we are becoming, I

know

this is true, at least for me, you have probably experienced it too and therefore over time we minimize where we are, in other words I am a little chubby instead of

know

you. Fat, you know? You don't magnify the degree to which the pain should affect you, so really what he means by that is listen, you're going to get out of your life what you're going to accept, that's really hard for people.

I think understanding is looking at what you think you're worth and what you're going to tolerate is absolutely what you're going to bring into your life and what the outside of your life is going to be like and so I live by that. I allowed myself to feel the pain and difficulty of not being where I want to be in whatever area that may be, this would be my spirituality, my relationships, my money. I allowed myself to feel that pain because, as you know, there are two motivators, there is the gain. of pleasure, of course, wanting to achieve something by chasing the dream, but then there is avoiding pain and for many champions that is a pretty big driving force for them and, at least for me, I took advantage of both things to achieve it. take action so that's what it means to me you've got the whole concept of happily dissatisfied which I think is brilliant thank you explain to people what that is but what I really want to know is how do you stop that I break you, mmm.

What is that, no one asked me before, it's actually along the same lines as getting what you tolerate, so there is this misnomer and you've seen it even in your own life or in successful people you've interviewed, so there is this thing. People think that I will be happy when once I have this big amazing house or once I have this car or once I have this relationship or this amount of money, then I will allow myself some happiness, the problem is always the line of goal. moves, you never get there, the other part is that people think well, if I enjoy it now, I will lose my drive, in other words, if I could connect with enough pain all the time, I won't lose my driving ambition, really. there is no correlation between the two at all there is no relationship between feeling total pain all the time and losing Drive and that's why I talked about living in a state of happy dissatisfaction and really the best example of that would be if you had ever I love it a good meal, you know?

If I bought a big piece of steak, if you're a steak eater like me, you take that first bite, it's like complete bliss,

right

? There is no correlation between how good it tasted and your lack of desire. for the next bite, in fact, that joy makes you want more and, therefore, the more we can reward ourselves with joy, we are not going to lose our dissatisfaction, we are not going to lose that, etc. To me, our brain gets a hit of dopamine that you get when you do something successful, if you constantly trick yourself into avoiding it, biomechanically, in your body, less and less in the future, where you want to reach the next level, the next dream. , the next step and that is. why do so many people stagnate in life, they didn't, they reached a certain point and tricked themselves into losing the joy of a celebration, it is important that we celebrate our victories, we celebrate our lives because that makes us want the next bite .

It keeps us hungrier, not the other way around, and that's why, for me, I want to live in a state of gratitude and happiness, not waiting for some future place or date that may never come up, so that's what it means to me, yeah, now that concept for me. It's really powerful and I talk about it a lot. 8020 Reisman. 80% of my time I think about the things that are amazing in my life and I'm grateful for the beautiful things I want to build and create, but I also dedicate 20% of my time. my time kicking my butt, yeah, because otherwise you get very stagnant, but the response I get from people is that they end up going down a dark path like, how do you help people not start eroding their confidence in themselves? mm-hmm and and maybe the

right

place to start is where self-confidence comes from, which is important because there is no relationship between that and eroding self-confidence;

In other words, self-confidence is really self-confidence, so the first thing is the people who I know are really happy with are very self-aware, in fact the best entrepreneurs I know are very self-aware. themselves, they are aware of their flaws, they want to improve them, they want to reach the next version of themselves all the time, etc. For me, self-confidence comes because I didn't have it and I think every time you meet someone like you or me who now seems confident in themselves it's because I really had to find tools and resources because I was very insecure, shy and introverted.

I had to find techniques and resources to develop that in myself and for me it is very simple: they are the promises that I keep to myself if I have the habit over and over again of piling one on top of the other to fulfill the promises I make to myself. Me, not other people, in other words, the moment you start being external in your life, worrying about what other people think of you, right, you have lost all control over yourself and that never fulfills you and the admiration of the people, the gratitude of the people towards you. it will never fill you it's yours it's yours inside and that's why, for me, self-confidence comes from keeping the promises that I make to myself and the other part is being aware that I'm doing it, in other words, the Most people don't do it.

They give themselves enough credit all the time, they're very aware of this 20 percent stuff and they're not aware of the 80 percent right and that's why dosage is so important: you guessed it right, it should be 80/20 right because people get it. get addicted to this I'm not good at this people don't like this about me I don't feel good instead of focusing on the 80s and building up wow I ate what I said I was going to do today I got up when I said I was going to do the number of phone calls I treated people in such a way that I promised myself that it's not just doing those things, it's rewarding, it's being aware of it and building it up when I work with athletes, the successful athletes that I work with when they are In a losing streak, it's never that they can no longer hit a ball or hit a shot or swing a golf club.

They have lost confidence in themselves somewhere along the way. They have lost the ability to concentrate on things. They are great and they accumulate those promises that they make to themselves and the way I get them to break their slump is not to correct their swing or make them positive, but to get them to recognize the little promises that show up in batting practice early, hitting that extra bucket of The balls that begin to reward themselves for the extra promises they keep to themselves return them to a state of self-confidence, suddenly they are hitting the ball very well again.

Okay this is so important man and I really hope people are listening and your story is so incredible and if we had more time we could go down all the avenues when you were starting out you're broke it's you your wife's car was embargoed because they cut off your water at one point, I mean, it's literally a good raisi, yeah. How do you start to develop that real taste, not in the abstract, but how do you start to develop your self-confidence when you're teaching people how to do something that you've never actually done in your life?

Life, like that moment, is where most people get caught up, now they see you successful and they just write you off a little bit because that's how you've done it, but if they can see you in that moment and understand what you are. saying to yourself mm-hmm and you start to like the reality of putting Velcro on your car to make it look like a Mercedes, so there's something really strange like you don't fully accept where you are, but you still really manage it, yeah. Wow, that's a good question, that's another question that I've never been asked that way before, so if we really go back and look at it, a couple of good things happened to me or me, one was at that time my wife did. be honest with me this is not who you are this is not who you are I don't recognize this person this is who you are and I had another person on my side pointing out the things that were great about me This is going to sound silly, but you I am going to say the most important thing and that is why life gives you these great tests.

I had a very good friend. I went to lunch and he said, I don't know who this guy is here. in front of me and he goes, let me ask you a question honestly right now why are you grateful and at lunch I said jack, nothing brother, there is nothing good in my life right now and I'm not exaggerating when I tell you this and this It's an objective story as I'm saying these words two people walked in with an older man both were clearly battling cancer somehow both had lost their hair one of the women had a cap on and were barely moving They both passed by our table and gave me the warmest green, the warmest smile like a stranger and he said, "It's pretty pathetic, you can't find anything in your life to be grateful for right now and on the way home, I'm not kidding." I began to accumulate gratitude.

I started taking inventory because if you can find things to be grateful for in that space, man, your life will be rich when there are actually external things to be grateful for, so my first mechanism outside of that space. Honestly, it was accumulating the things that I was grateful for and I started reinforcing them over and over again and what happens is there's a reticular activation system in our brains and all of a sudden, because that's the message it was giving me. same all the time. Suddenly, all of these things start coming into my consciousness that I'm grateful for.

I began to magnetize towards me some people that I needed to find in my life and that was the next layer. I started to see things to be grateful for for my health. fitness people who loved me and when they did it changed my state when I accumulated gratitude I changed what I did in the morning and I changed what I did at night and so I somehow took control of my morning and I took control of my afternoon I got certain control in the middle of the day. In those days I was an out of control person, which means I woke up worried,stressed, fearful and immediately start thinking about a bill.

I had to pay for something that was wrong and I'm in a state of reaction to start talking to every sound within six minutes of waking up, six seconds, most people hear this, that's what they do. I said I have to take control of my morning and establish routines in my morning, maybe they will help me. maybe they didn't but they were things that I could do for myself and that not only gave me control over the day but I also started to build up confidence in myself and what were some of those things that you grabbed hugely and that I have about the launch. this, but I also have audios on these things that people can get for free, but by the way, they are amazing, thanks man, thanks 100%.

I really hope people dive in like they would. Your content is amazing, thank you, so is yours. That's why I wanted to find you and that's why I've wanted to be in your presence for a long time, which is why my morning routines are very detailed. I get up and hydrate. The second thing I do every morning is something cold. so whether I jump into the ocean because I live in the ocean now, but in those days it was taking a cold shower or splashing some cold water on my face or going out when it was cold, that impacts our nervous system, our flight hits us. .

I am in a state of cellular electrical connection. Obviously I do some prayer and meditation every morning. I haven't touched my phone yet, so there is a rule: there are 30 minutes where I can't touch my phone when I wake up. That's the hardest thing in the world to do and the thing that could benefit you the most because you have to react to what's on that phone and usually it's stuff that's not good, so I don't touch that, I do my meditation on my prayer and do some stretches. some breathing exercises and then at that point I allow myself to enter the world after I have my state under control and I exercise every morning except Sunday, so I exercise every morning, talk to me about exercising, that's something that completely changed my life, obviously, and every time someone asks me a question about you know how I'm lost, I feel like you know you're completely out of control, I have no confidence, my answer is to figure me out too, so why?

Well I believe that everything in our body everything in our lives begins with our body if you are a person of faith you believe that that is where your soul is properly housed and that is why you make emotions you don't just feel them you make them in other words and You know this from things you have learned in your life, but joy is a real action, not just an emotion, we feel a certain joy, a certain breathing, a certain movement in our body, depression and sadness, it is something we do. We were more hunched over our breathing.

Superficial, so there is a correlation between the way you move your body and your emotions directly, this is before we even get to the hits of dopamine and our nervous system. I'm just telling you that the way you move your body is an emotion that makes emotions and then when you move your body you can't be in full workout mode moving your body running walking jumping rope and being depressed don't go together that much because your body doesn't. receive the connection I'm in. I move like I'm happy. I move like I'm having sex. I move like I'm happy.

These are all joyful states. You can't be depressed simultaneously, so the quickest way to change our behavior, our emotions is our state. It's with our body, now let's talk about the outfits that really burn and hurt. One thing I've discovered is that you've talked about this with entrepreneurship and generally you've said it's the best thing, like self-awareness. mechanism, you will find out who you are, what you are capable of, how hard you are willing to push most people, although when you get to that position, it seems right, that is kind of a bridge too far, yes, but when you start in the gym and it's like whether I do this extra set or not, I push myself, I do an extra exercise, you come back to confidence and self-belief, it's like you start to learn something about yourself, I'm stealing it from you, no, Please, I meant that.

It legitimately changed my life and when I see guys who are successful entrepreneurs and they are deluded, yeah, that doesn't surprise me either, so I play these very strange games with myself when I'm at the gym when I work out. I always do an extra rep, an extra set because it's a promise that I kept to myself and here's the most important thing, it's a pattern, it's a pattern that I keep I always do a little more, I always go an inch further and it's the most quick and easy. The place to do it is the gym because I can always grab one more weight in one more set and that's what it does: it changes your identity.

I talked to myself about identity because that's how I first heard that from Tony, Tony Robbins, the notion that Identity drives behavior and it was one of those lightning rod moments. I thought, "That's the hook." If I want to change my behaviors, I need to think about myself in a different way. Right, you've leveraged identity in a very powerful way. How did you do it? You have done it and you like some specific moments when identity came to your rescue, so identity is the ruler of our lives, it is the invisible force that no one understands and once you understand it and master it, your life can change and So not only if you fail to control this, these external conditions of your life will remain exactly the same, but you might behave differently, you might do all the work now, you might have great thoughts, but you're going to get out. of your life you are going to be the most powerful force in the world, I think it is being consistent with the concepts, ideas and values ​​that you have for yourself, you will get that out of your life, what you will tolerate, okay, the deepest part of that .

It is identity and therefore identity is very much like a thermostat placed on a wall, right, this is important once the temperature is set to a certain degree, everything in the external world can reach it and you will find a way to get that temperature even in this. Let's say the house is set at 80 degrees, if we open all the doors and the cold air, the worst things in life, blizzard or life, came in, the thermostat will turn on the heater and regulate this room to 80 degrees at reverse. It is also true that it is a super hot day.

Great things are happening in your life. It's getting hotter and hotter and hotter if you're at 80 degrees, that internal thermostat will find a way over a period of time to cool your life back down to 80 degrees again, so the key, the secret key, is to be able to change that identity 90 120, so some of the ways that the strategies to do it are very simple, one is if let's say financially you're a 200 degree or and I'm an 80 degree, if I'm around you over and over again, you're going to warm my identity somewhere between mine and yours at 150 degrees the same and the same physical condition and everything, so the more you can overlap multiple people, the more Stronger and stronger, those forces change our thermostat through Association.

It's a huge, huge, huge thing. People say you are who the five people you hang out with are. That's why they adjust your thermostat. That's the second number one way you can change your identity. short bursts of something in a period of time that you haven't done before and changed the thermostat temperature permanently almost like a water line in the pool, so whether it's a certain amount at the gym or a certain amount of phone calls on your business or a certain amount of dating you earn a certain amount of money many times you are never the same again have you seen this when your own net worth I have seen it in mind that became a point where I made a jump and a short window , I was never the same again.

You could go back a little bit, but not to where you were before, so it's about activity or successful achievements in short periods of time and then obviously our self-confidence also affects identity and We've covered that those are three quick ways , that's incredible, so explain to me how your baseball career ends. I know you and your dad now said he's your best friend, Meru, growing up, alcoholic dad, you said, so I think it was 14 or 15 the real ones and then you're constantly portrayed as the shy kid who plays baseball falls down and now It's like how do you get out from under?

Well, I'm the son of someone who fought against a drug. and alcohol I'm the kid who was supposed to be great at baseball and now that's gone, like how do you free yourself from the weight of that? Yeah, it is too when I was little, mom, I was really little too, so that's probably the reason I lift weights I was always there in every baseball photo I'm the kid holding a sign in the front right, so I was small and skinny, these two made fun of me Eddie Spaghetti, you know, they bullied me at school and I never retaliated.

I had that mix of shyness mixed with chaos in my house that a lot of people can relate to and I have to tell you that the change of sports for me was good for me because it gave me an outlet that I finally found something that I was pretty good at. I think the biggest change in our lives, what makes us happiest is that when someone helps us identify our natural talents and when I was a little kid, when I got a little older, they pointed out my speed, so it wasn't like that. . my lack of size was fast, I was good at the basket, I always wanted to be a fast kid and I gained confidence in baseball by doing so, when I got into the business I said you know you're intense when someone points out a gift about you that you too Intuitively I know it's true, they are linked to it, if you are intense, your passion, you will not leave work, you are relentless, I want, I am those things and when someone linked those gifts to me, winning, now I believed that I could win, that It's the other way to change your identity, it's when someone can link your talent to victory, you'll believe it, it's not that you're great, that's general, but it's something you know specific, for you right now, you wouldn't brag about it. there are some things that you know, you know what I'm good at at these things, I've always been good at these things, it's natural to me and when someone relates that to you winning, like you, for example, you're an amazing interviewer.

In general, you don't need to be the smartest person in the room because you probably are most of the time, so there's a confidence that allows you to be present when you interview me and just listen, that's different than anyone who's interviewed me. before and that's a natural gift for you, that's why there's a part of you that knows I'm pretty, wouldn't you say that if I'm pretty good at this, this is a good program, and that's why the way we Change our identity the same way I changed mine was by getting in touch with some of my natural gifts and then using them in my career using them and in my life, that took the weight off my shoulders because the weight was that I suck. shy I'm small I have a fucked up family that's just the right weight to take off the way they are these are some gifts that God gave me or the universe gave me or that at least I know I have and I can spend my life using these gifts now I have hope now my identity is changing now my life is going in a different direction that's amazing one thing you've talked about and that is I think what I find really amazing about your notions about identity is that in the In the early days of building your business, you said and I quote I was an idiot, yes, but you were open to hearing that most people can't hear that, so that's a moment where you accept that your identity is something that you you are not proud.

How is that change made? How do you go in a new direction where someone, instead of pointing out something beautiful, is pointing out something ugly? Yes, aren't most of you the friends you revere the most and the ones you are most willing to receive advice from? You 100 wasn't me either, so I can't tell you why I'm like that, but I do think it was baseball. I never took it personally when a coach said you're dropping your shoulder to others because of athleticism when I. he said open your right leg your legs are too close together I never thought I stink I can't hit I wanted to know how to hit better I wanted to know how to throw better and that's why I personally am constantly in a crisis. to get to the next version of me is not how I would like I wish I would just like to probably have a little more peace in my life I am in a crisis to get to the next version of myself and that's why the guy sitting in front of me in front of you now Even if I come back in a year and I'm exactly the same person with the same thoughts, the same ideas, the same ways of expressing them, this was a wasted year of my life, so I want to know how to get to that next version of me and to those of you who struggle to accept criticism, ask me how important it is for you to grow because you were put on earth to grow, contribute, serve, help, you were on your path and on your current path.

The version of you is perfect as it is now, but it will be inferior next year, you are perfect as you are now, especially you ladies,excellent at it, so yes, I do it. I love it that way. I love it. This is a little different, but something you were saying a minute ago reminded me. I, from your whole notion that you have a step towards the dream, you have to touch the dream. I love it, I think that's so powerful and so friend. I was very touched that you pointed to the cliff with you and then girlfriend.

Now wife, yes, someday we will live there because my wife and I used to drive through this neighborhood and say someday and man, I get chills again when you said your obsessions become your possessions, that's literally how it is. you really think and focus on what you mean by entering the dream and how it can serve people. That's wonderful the way you picked a really good place to go into. Thank you. I must tell you that your mind gravitates towards whoever is most familiar with it, if you are really familiar with what you are worried about and what your problems are and what your fears are, that becomes your dominant thought.

I know you've all heard this, but this is why your mind loves. what's familiar, yeah, okay, so if you don't touch the dreams, for example, just experience them for a second, for example, we would go down. Once every eight weeks, if I was doing well in business, we would really get over it, we could find a deal. I had 200 dollars, we would go to the Ritz-Carlton or some Ocean hotel and for a day, facing the ocean, I felt like I was a valet. your car walk straight into the lobby mr. mile in welcome back, she would go get a massage.

I play a little golf and just for that day I play the dream and then we do it again in a month or two and again in a month, just a little taste. My mind began to familiarize itself with it and became crazier. I started tricking myself into thinking it was there because we never end up in a place that we don't think we don't belong in and then we're not familiar with it, so there are these things that you would like to do in your life, whether it's seeing them visually a and again and repeating those images to yourself, that is powerful, but a double whammy is not only repeating them and seeing them, but going to see that there is a thing that is visual stimulus in your brain that makes you want to do something, triple hit is if you can see it, touch it, feel it and smell it, if you allow all your senses to experience something, it becomes much more familiar to your brain and that's why I'm a big proponent of touching a dream in any form, you can get it, the best of which is really go and experience it short term, you start to believe that you belong there, you're a little bit better off, so you probably won't produce it.

There are many things in your life that you haven't visited mentally or literally thousands of times, so if you want to end up somewhere you better visit them. Those might be dream visions, but the most important thing is that if you could do it, it would be more powerful. you're going to touch them, short term, huge difference, you drive around the neighborhood, you see the cars, if you want to spend your life serving your church or your community, take one day off every month and actually do it, you know how It feels like spending an afternoon. feeding the homeless or what to do and you start to love it and feel it and believe that you belong there, the chances are getting more and more that one day you can do that full time, buddy, that's awesome before I ask my last question, tell him to these guys. where they can find your amazing content thanks to any edmy let comm, which is my le TT comm.

I have a YouTube channel and Instagram and Facebook and all that too, but you're any of the normal platforms if you Google my name. You'll see my stuff out there, so yes, you actually will, thanks. Ok, my last question: what impact do you want to have on the world? Hmm, the impact they want to have on the world sounds very general, but it's something that I'm obsessed with is inspiring as many people as I physically can in their lives to pursue the ultimate version of themselves in their own way, in their place and in your space, so I think I have a little number written down.

I can reach a hundred million people before I leave here with just that message of chasing the version of you that you were born to be that version of you or me it has nothing to do with it could have to do with money but it could have to do with people the ones you come in with, the people you touch, the one person's life you change, the only thing people miss in business is that someone hired me for the business I met, so even though I'm a story of Pretty good business, what about The person who gave me the opportunity, what about that door that opened?

How many people did he reach and no one even knows their name? That's why I want to be that person who gives people their platform, their opportunity in life, their ability to join the community. rows of people who know the highest version of themselves and that is the impact I want to make in the world. That's amazing man, thanks so much for them, so who is it? I loved it, thanks guys, when I say you're going to want to do it. Go watch this man's content when I think about becoming that idealized version of myself, the next thing I think about is how can I become that better version of myself and that's my obsession, that's what I want to bring to the world and looking at your content and seeing how much of that gives, how often you can get past the similar high level title and really get into what you really need to do.

In fact, I recommend you watch this episode again because it breaks it down right there. There were several times where I went through doing this and this is deadly simple and it's incredibly powerful you know me if you watch these shows you know me. I'm telling you right now. As much as I was shocked by his stuff, it's very rare that while I'm researching someone I do a social acknowledgment because I'm so shocked by what I'm seeing that I couldn't help it, it's absolutely unbelievable that someone like that has gone through this that isn't trying to seem cool. but they really are great, that's the best part.

He's done extraordinary things, extraordinary things, but he didn't start anywhere extraordinary and that's what makes him so fascinating and he's killing himself with every second of every video to tell you exactly what he did, what he thinks, what he does, how he made those changes. and if you do, you can make those changes too. I believe that deep down, so go check it out. I'll trade you if you leave it right, my friends, if you haven't already, be sure to subscribe and until next time, be legendary. Thank you all so much for watching and being a part of this community, if you haven't already, make sure to subscribe.

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