My Traumatizing Haunted House Experience

I wanted to make this video about six months ago, but then I was like, "NO! I'll save it for Halloween, for 'THEME' or..." whatever, I don't know. SHUT UP! I don't have to explain myself! I'm excited to tell you this story! WOW!!! (Laughs) So,

haunted

house

s. I think Haunted Houses are cool... But I don't want to brag or anything, but since I was 16, I've never been in a Haunted House that scared me. Of course, all the Haunted Houses I've ever been to were free and didn't have any signs of waiver, and when I was little, of course, I was TERRIFIED by Haunted Houses.

It's just... I don't know... I think I was telling myself that none of it was real. And then as I grew up, I always knew that none of it was real. When you can see that the severed hand is made of plastic, all the tension you had previously is lost a little. And sure, I'm still surprised by the jumpscares, but since they don't stab you or anything, it's always UNCOMFORTABLE afterwards. Uh... Hello? Uh... I'm going to walk here now. Or maybe I'm not afraid anymore because I don't feel emotions anymore... WHO KNOWS!? But there is one

experience

at the Haunted House during my senior year of high school that I will never forget, because it was probably one of the most

traumatizing

things I have ever seen in my life.

I haven't seen so many

traumatizing

things. And also, I won't forget it, because I'm about to immortalize the

experience

by making a YouTube video about it. Alright, in my senior year, I was part of my school's Drama Club. I was a theater kid. And the school clubs helped run some of the school fair activities. The whole school is organizing a fair, probably to raise money or something. It seems like schools always need some extra money, have you ever noticed that? So did the football team have to do the dunk tank, did the band kids paint their faces or something?

I don't remember, it's not important. And the theater children, since the fair is in October and that is the month of Halloween, we have to set up a

haunted

house

. Cool! The Drama Club was divided into groups, and each of us would be a "Scary Part" in the Haunted House. And we got to make the Haunted House inside the school. So we had a lot of space to work with and there was a lot of space between each scary thing. My group, what we did was we dressed up as vampires, but scary vampires, and we sat at this table and decorated it with fake organs, cups full of blood (Red Kool-Aid), and we had this freshman. girl who was lying on the table and we put fake organs coming out of her, you know, to make it look like we were eating her because vampires eat... people.

Okay, saying that out loud, I realize it doesn't make any sense, why would a group of Vampires be eating... someone? They...they...they don't do that. We put a yellow sheet over the light above to create a good WIFE atmosphere. We had a smoke machine, some background Halloween music playing... ♫ SCARY AND SCARY SKELETONS SEND SCALLIES UP YOUR SPINE ♫ Our group was pretty LEGITIMATE. Every time a group of people passed by, we would just stare at them in silence, and then the freshman at the table would scream at the top of her lungs... She was very good at screaming, by the way.

And because we had so much space between each of the scary parts, when they walked past us, we would get up and chase them! YEAH! It was fun. Okay, so you have to understand that theater kids are VERY LOUD and outgoing people. I need to tell you about this kid who was in my vampire group, Um... we'll just call him... Balake. Yes, Balake. Balake and I were part of the school's Improv Club, so we were both pretty funny people, except Balake was just OUTSIDE. He was LOUD. It seemed like she was always screaming. I didn't have any classes with him, but he was obviously the high self-esteem type of clown kid.

So Balake, being the loudest and most popular boy, sat at the head of our table. We had already done the Haunted House for about two hours and I want you to think about what it's like to walk into a Haunted House. Just walking in for 5 minutes will already make me feel uncomfortable and sweaty. All the strobe lights, the smoke, and the freshman who has to constantly be yelling "BLOODY MURDER"... Again, you did a good job, freshman. And we were supposed to have a break sometime halfway through, but because the haunted house was so popular, we didn't get a single break.

So I'm a little crazy after doing all this for so long, right? I was NOT fully prepared for what was about to happen. This group of people come in and we do the normal thing, we get up and chase them. But Balake got quite physical with this little boy, like he shook him a little. And I didn't see exactly what happened, but apparently this kid was holding a fish in a plastic bag, you know? Those tiny little fish that are actually supposed to be food for bigger fish that you can win as prizes at fairs? And 99% of the time fish die within two weeks because you don't have the right aquarium equipment.

So you just put them in water and watch them slowly die. Do you know those fish? I didn't think people were allowed to bring their new pet fish into the Haunted House, but I guess he smuggled it in or something. I didn't see the boy drop the fish, maybe Balake took it out of his hands; that could have happened, I just heard a scream and saw a fish, falling into a puddle on the ground. Fish seem to be in a lot of PAIN when they are out of the water. I don't flail around uncontrollably when I go swimming.

Calm down, fish! I'm quietly panicking, because it looks like the fish is going to die in 3 seconds if we don't do something. I'm starting to think about places where we can put the fish. Uh... Uh... THE BATHROOM! But Balake, without saying anything, immediately leaned over, took the little fish in his hands, ran back to the table, put the fish in an empty cup, and then POURED RED KOOL-AID INTO THE CUP. NO! I'm kidding! He pulled out a bottle of water from under the table because they gave us bottles of water, and the fish was good, ladies and gentlemen!

It all happened very quickly and thanks to Balake's quick thinking, he saved this little boy's fish. The boy was still a couple of feet from the hallway, Balake took the cup in his hands, brought it to the boy, reached out to give him his fish... AND THEN HE JUST DRINK THE DRINK! !!!!!!!!!!!! BALAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE! DRINK! HE! FISH! And this little boy let out the most bloodcurdling scream. It sounded like this kid had just watched his pet get swallowed by a complete stranger. It was honestly THE loudest scream I heard that night. I bet the next group of people behind these guys were thinking, "Oh, man.

Whatever comes next must be really scary for that kid to scream like that." The boy started trying to attack Balake, and I'm sure if he had the right tools he would have killed him, Balake finally spit out the fish. (Spitting sound) He didn't swallow it, THANK YOU! He just kept it swimming in his mouth, but that's what you have to do when you work in a haunted house. You have to scare people however you can. I was just a spectator and I still wake up in a cold sweat thinking about it. Turns out this kid was actually Balake's little brother, so at least he didn't do this to a complete stranger.

Man, you really come to appreciate the lengths to which older brothers will go to torment the little brother. Balake's little brother, you may be watching, but I was there, buddy! I know the pain you go through. I also have an older brother. I know what it's like to be Luigi. I mean, he never swallowed any of my pets, he just stole my food. He also never let me win at Super Smash Bros. Every time I was about to win, he turned off the Nintendo. But I mean, I'm fine! Look how I turned out. I shouldn't be so hard on my older brother.

After all, he SUPPOSEDLY watches my videos. No one sends you a link to this video, I want to see if you actually watch them. Hey bro, you probably forgot all the times you turned off the Nintendo 64, but I'll never forget the first time I beat you at Super Smash Brothers fair and square. We were on the stage of Link, your favorite character, and ironically, I was Luigi. Then, changing the subject, someone asked me if I said "Wear your seat belt," because some of my acquaintances died in a car accident or something. No. No one I have ever known has died in a car accident.

I know some people who have been in car accidents, but they all lived because they wore their seat belts.