the office actually needing michael scott for 20 minutes 46 seconds | The Office US | Comedy Bites

I am a hero? I can't really say it, but yeah, from David Wallace to all the Dunder mithin woohoo. Greetings to all. I'm sure you've seen the article in the newspaper. I just want to emphasize that it's all guesswork. Rumor has it they will. recommend declaring bankruptcy no, no, that doesn't make any sense, oh Lord, we are all going to lose our jobs, what, my God, what happened, there is news that there has been a murder, what M, what has happened a murder at the Savannah games. It has the power to distract people from stressful situations.

Battleship helped me get through my parents' divorce surgery, helped me get through my vasectomy, that is, my operation. I don't think I would have been able to handle my breakup with Holly if it hadn't been for her throwing him away. Bells Bourbon and Bullets, a Murder Mystery Dinner Party game, is a lot of fun. Everyone plays a character. We walk around the room. We're trying to find out who did it. Hey, I wonder if this is a terrible idea. This is my decision. Picture stuff is about murder, okay, I'm going to skip the what and go with the why because this is a recreation of a crime scene.

I am the corpse and these are the fragments of my brain. Hey, shut up, dad, Michael, can I? I'm talking to you in Michael here my name today of all days you shut up they need this game Jim let us have this stupid little game okay I think today was a good day to have two managers because if you're a family stuck in a lifeboat in the middle of the ocean one parent might want to keep rolling, but if the other parent wants to play a game it's not because they're crazy, it's because they're doing it for the kids, Jim, we have to order a cake. for Creed's birthday, oh, wasn't it just someone's birthday?

Yes, Kelly's was last week. Remember, yes, I remember, yes, it's her birthday month. Creed is today. The Oscars are next week. Meredith is at the end of the month. Michael usually uses red and white current. I have an idea, why don't we have a big shared party? There are 13 people working in this

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, so 13 times a year, Michael gets a cake, balloons, and some kind of gag gift, he makes a toast, and there are two types of toasts. one is a joke about how old you are look at those wrinkles black people crack no crack dope and the other is something inappropriate or horrible or both what else just sings high harmony for happy birthday and is a big believer in surprise parties maybe even you could say it's probably a mistake happy birthday happy birthday so I think yes I think getting them out of the way could be productive we can have a big fun party and everyone is happy and no one is waiting for their moment.

I don't like. What is Jim thinking about it being a birthday and what if there are too many of them? Yes, I work hard all day. I like knowing there will be a break most days. I just sit and wait for the break. I took an extra shot of insulin in preparation. for this cake today if I don't have some cakes I might die soon why don't you just eat an apple why don't you mind your business listen I realized this Jimmy had a birthday 3 weeks ago so don't be careful, be careful, I think he missed it power up to the head, yeah, hey, Jim, hey guys, what are we talking about, nothing, nothing's wrong, we're not talking about nothing, come on gang, hey, Jim, Toby, hey, I just found out of community birthdays, great idea, oh thank you. man yeah is there anything my birthday was two months ago?

Oh, okay, there was a party, whatever there was, but Michael scheduled it for Friday 458, you know, people sing in the parking lot. I remember I don't know, I just thought maybe. You could seriously include me. I just thought you could add me. I don't know what's wrong with that. Toby is great, he is great, but sometimes he can be a little excessive. I don't see any harm in that. Well, it's a cake. Toby, come on, okay, yeah, you know what we're going to get you into because the longer the marriage, no way, I'm not a machine, Jim, you can't just change plans whether you want to or not and wait for these magical little elves. from the party. to carry out your orders we already have devil's food sweet peach cobbler whale mushroom caps I'm allergic to mushrooms that's a pain okay so we have to say hi to everyone hello how are you could I have your attention please because we have to talk about this birthday? thing conference room yes conference room 5

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no no we're going to figure it out right here we're going to talk about it here so who has problems with birthday? thing one two three all are fine, so shouldn't we do it, what am I supposed to do with two cakes and one cake?

Oh, I'll take them, no one will touch my shoe rack, hey Michael, I mean Jim, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy bird, dear Creed, happy birthday to you, yeah, okay, jump. across the room jump across the room we won't be okay okay don't do that you're going to break something sure I'm glad I'm back you're relieved you have no idea so what did I miss? Well, I tried to put everything. birthdays together at the same time oh what a terrible idea, yeah okay, I made that rookie mistake, you did it, uhhuh, yeah, let it wait 10 years, you'll figure it out fine.

I don't think I'll be here in 10 years, but that's what he said that's what he said that's what he said I never know I just say it I say things like that you know to lighten the tension when things get tough that's what she said hey nice very good Bravo my young Ward to Oscar Martínez is the Money Sh Me Award Michael has recorded all the Dundy awards and now he makes me watch hours of footage to find the highlights of Ladi, a little bit of Pam throughout the night, a little bit about Angela, this is the part where Kevin sat in front of the camera. all night the Dundy award for longest engagement goes to Pam Beasley Pam everyone, when are you all getting married?

That's what I have to say. Ah, Royy, I accept. Thank you. Are there any words you would like to say on Pam's behalf? We'll see. you next year, yes, I hope not, I hope not. I'm not going to change, that's the best one, no, it's funny, you're right, I just think the longest engagement in the world, uh, we're all waiting for it, you know, that's why it's funny every year that Roy and Pam, don't you cases, it gets funnier, well I guess if you use the same jokes it just seems lazy, oh, lazy, uhhuh and the next award will go to our little Pam Beasley.

I think we all know what award Pam will receive. to receive this year is the award for the whitest sneakers because she always has a white, her sneakers on, get on here P surprisingly, ladies and gentlemen, oh here we go, I have a lot of people to thank for this award, okay, first of all , my kids because I couldn't have done it without them thank you let's give a round of applause to Michael for mcing tonight because this is a lot harder than it looks and also for Dwight so finally I want to thank God because God gave me this Dundy. and I feel God in these chiles tonight, ladies and gentlemen, oh, so what is this presentation about?

Ah I see, this is of general interest, it is about priorities and decision making using the ship as an analogy, what is important to you if the ship is sinking, what should you do? you save women and children, no no, salespeople and profit centers, that's a stupid analogy, oh okay, you obviously don't know anything about leadership. Well, I was the captain of a Coastal Patrol boat on Cyclone PC1 during Desert Storm. Wow, you should be his motivational speaker. oh, okay, yeah, he gives me real responsibility. Michael Captain Jack delegates, he let me steer the ship for the last hour.

I would like to be engaged, how did you manage to achieve that? um uh, I've been engaged for 3 years and there's no end in sight, so you don't want to ask me for advice. Let's say your

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building is on fire. Jim, who would you save? Look, the client, because the client may not be what he was looking for, but it's a good idea, you know what he would do. save the receptionist just wanted to clear that up hello everyone can I get her attention for a second? Listen to me for a second. We were up front and we were talking about what's really important and Pam, I think.

It's enough. I think we should set a day for our wedding. Like June 10th. Come on, let's do it. Someone there. What happened? Captain Jack has a problem with authority. Oh, right, because you announced that his boat was thinking. Yeah, he just completely lost it. If you ask me, he caused Panic M Night, well, good for you. Your friend got engaged. I was committed. Roy said the first one didn't count. That's great. I am telling you the truth. I used to have a big thing for Pam, so really you. You're kidding, you and Pam, wow, I never would have put you two together, you really nailed it, you did it right.

God usually has a radar for things like that. You know, I made out with Jan, yes, I know, yes, well, Pam is cute, yes, she is very funny. she's warm and anyway she's good if you like it so much don't give up she's engaged BFD engaged she's not married eh never ever give up excuse me all sex now that I have your attention you don't have our attention money I'm listening to you, you had me in sex pervert, you have our full attention just by shouting, anything that's good, know what you mean, Michael wow, okay, I've warmed them up for you, you got the R word, how's everyone?

Well, now many of you have staked out your corner of the Wolf Empire. Raise your hand if I'm describing you. Great for my current investors. Things are going very well. We already have a buyer. Who really is the University of Washington? Is there any particular branch of Washington? University, University of Washington Public Health Fund Wu PF oh god they just want it for the initials the domain name yes they do I move we sell what yes we sell get us out have some faith In this idea, if everyone wants to sell, we sell. right, I'm not selling and you know that Ryan and I have the majority of the shares, right?

Yes, only you do it. Actually, yes, we won't sell. I won't sell. There are a lot of other people in this office that you have money on the line other people that you care about maybe you're right maybe I'm crazy right? I'm just saying that. I think I agree with your point, yes, but in a joking way, where you're going to start singing. I thought so. It might make me feel better, okay, go ahead, but it might be crazy, no, you have nine days to save everyone's money, uh, that's a lot of pressure. I'm going to need more time, you can't have it, okay, I won't do it. let you down the world send people your way Ryan came to me through a temp agency and was transferred here I have no idea where Creed came from the point is you just have to play with the cards you're dealt Jim that guy is a ace Dwight is my king in my sleeve Phyllis is my spinster Oscar is my queen that's easy give me a hard one that's what Oscar said Toby is the instruction card you pull Pam is a solid seven and yeah you know what Ryan is probably like two but sometimes they both can be wild so be careful and obviously I'm the Joker so that's uh wol from Ryan Howard decided to sell the company thanks bro what a trip thank god oh by the way you should Come to my art show, oh art show.

I mean, it's not a big deal, but I think a lot of people from the office will be there, oh yeah, I'll definitely be there, sure, hey babe, how are you? Hey bro, bro, hey, hey, Kenny, hey, Pam, hey, how about this? Hey, I show it with my brother and there's no one from work here, that's cool. Hey, you're the one who said we needed more culture, this is culture for you, it's his first attempt, yes, in Van Go's first attempt, he drew the hands of the peasants. I mean, what a meaning, real art takes courage, okay, and honestly, well, those aren't Pam's strong points, yeah, exactly, that's why it's Motel art, thanks for coming, Pam Caso, sorry, I got here late, I had to run around town, oh Michael, wow, you did this by show of hands. yeah omg these could be rubbings oh look at this one wow you nailed it how much do you mean?

I don't see the price, do you want to buy it, well, yes, yes, we have to have it for the office, I mean, there is my window and there is my car is that your car aha that is our building and we sell paper I am very proud of you Thank you, you have something in your pocket, husky, I love it, no, thank you, um, I don't know how to tell you this, but we have a little problem, you know what the minister just told me, that it is tradition that the best man is older than the groom, oh Come on, I've never heard of anything like that. obviously, but I'm out because I'm significantly younger than you, not an important word, I think it's okay, either way, anyway, Dwight, I can't be there for you, I'm sorry Jim, I really wish I could. had. something I could do Michael, I can't believe you came, that's what she said, best joke in the world.