Seth and Julia Louis-Dreyfus Go Day Drinking

-Hello everyone. I'm here at Dawson's Restaurant and Bar in midtown Manhattan with comedy legend Julia Louis-Dreyfus. -Hello. -Julia stars in a movie called "Tuesday." It's new. And because it's called Tuesday. We decided to get drunk on a weekday. Our first drink is a Julia Louis Dry Martini. -Yeah. -Health. -Health. A little dirty too, I might add. -A tad dirty. That's what they say about our friend. -Oh, no, I'm not going to do that. You're crazy? Guys, this show is a terrible idea. -It's time for "Day of Drinking with Seth and...'Hoolia'..." Is it "Hoolia"? -Yeah. -...Louis-Dreyfus.

Julia, you were on a show called "Veep." -Was. -It never took off. -Good. -But we wanted to honor him. -Oooh! -And then we are going to prepare you some vice president-themed cocktails. -Well? -Well. UH Huh. -Then the first one is called Nelson Rockefeller. Alright. Diamond Vodka. He was a rich man. -Yeah. -That's the issue here. Port Ruby. Ruby. -I don't understand the "ruby" of all this. -Well, Ruby is... Rich people have rubies. -Oh. -This is based on... -Like this? - Exactly. Gold Schlager. -UH Huh. -And then we're going to put some chocolate gold coins. -Mm-hmm. Oh Lord. -No...

It sounds like jewelry! -Oh! - -Health. -Health. -Tell him... Be honest. ♪♪ -That's disgusting. -Do you know who was the oldest vice president we had? -Tell me. -Alben W. Barkley. He was the oldest. So we'll start with Old Forester. -Nice. -Yeah. -What's that? -It's like a whiskey. -Well. -And then we will have an old grandfather. -A whiskey too. -Yes, a couple of whiskeys. We're going to serve an old fashioned, which, of course, is made with, you know, bourbon, and then some Werther's Originals. Now can I be honest with you? -Is this show the worst idea you have ever done in your life? ♪♪ -Are you spitting? -Save it. -Well.

This is called Harry Truman. He was vice president. -Yeah. -Let's throw two Jager bombs in a beer. -Yeah. What are Jager bombs? -Well, a Jager bomb is dropping Jager into a beer and then

drinking

it. -I understand. But what is a Jager? -It's what the kings and queens of France did... - -And then it is a very fine alcohol. -No no. Oh, I will absolutely drink it. -You've probably never been anywhere fancy enough for it. -Yeah. Oh what? Damn. No. I'm telling you, man, you're going to be very sick. Oh, this man. This is a terrible show, guys. -I didn't...

I spilled more than I wanted when I dropped it, and I'm sorry. -Yes, that was bad. I will send you the invoice for this jacket. -Please tell me it is one of your cheapest jackets. - It's not. -Oh -It's very expensive. Well, guys... -Well, try it... take a sip and tell me what you think. -I took a sip. -And you liked it? -I did not. -You didn't like any of them! -No, they are all terrible. These are all horrible drinks. Come on. -Live your life. Take chances! Do new things! -Alright. -Let's go back to the martini. -The last one is your favorite vice president.

His name is Dick Cheney. Why do you think a Dick Cheney is a shot of whiskey? -Because he shot someone in the face. - He did. -Yeah. -And then we look back and think, "Do you remember those simple times?" Remember when our vice presidents just shot people in the face? -Oh! Health. ♪♪ That I like. -You like that? -Not precisely. -Julia. -Yeah. -You may be my favorite member of the three-name club. -Oh thanks. -Our celebrities with three names. And now we are going to question you about your brothers and sisters. I'm going to show a three-name celebrity with only one of the three names.

You'll guess... You'll fill it out. -Oh God. Very well, go. -And if you do it right, I'll drink. And if you do it right, you, my friend, will drink. -Well. -Although it is increasingly clear that you don't care. -No, I mean, I like to have a drink. I just don't like it, you know... -My drinks? -Correct. That? - -Um... -Come on, you can do this. -Oh, wait, I do. I know. Salma Jessica Smith. -That? I really thought you knew. He was so...he was so proud of you. -Thank you. I'm a good actor. -Forward. -I'm going to...

I'm going to make it easier. -Oh, of course. -If there is a Salma Jessica Smith in the universe and they call me, I will drink a bottle of tequila until I die. -Andrew Says Clay! - Oh! The strange thing... You know what? I feel like... -Am I wrong? -You are not right. I'm Andrew Lloyd Webber, but... -What do you care? -I feel like you're right. -Bam. -Good job choosing one that had two! lazy ass -Make another one. -I know how this works. -Well, I'm just trying to get the show moving for a change. Haley...Bieber Smith? -No. -I do not know who is he. -See dead people.

A new version of it. -Haley Jones Johnson. -Who is that? -Haley Joel Osment, but pretty close. -Oh, I would never have gotten that. -Why am I

drinking

? -Because you're drunk. You have no idea what you're doing. Oh, John Wayne Gacy. -Oh, suddenly, that sounded familiar to me. -It turns out that I know all the murderers. -Go to the Dreyfus house, they are all paintings of clowns. ♪♪ -Martin... George McGillicuddy. Thank you. -Are you ready for your heart to drop? -Do you know why it is particularly horrible? -Please inform us. -Because I just went on the civil rights tour last week.

I did it, I swear. I was in Birmingham and Montgomery. -Did you arrive 10 hours late? -I'm so angry with myself. María Luisa Parker. -Oh, well, you got another one right. By the way, you just have to give credit to how quickly you got the white lady. And I know... -Thank you again. Do you want me to understand that now? -No, i do not do it. -Guys, that was amazing. And if you don't mind me telling you, with the exception of one moment, I think I killed that game. -You were a true John Wicks –Wilkes Booth.

I still feel bad about the Jager bomb and how he splashed you, so do you want to try your best to take one of those shots at me? -Sure. -You did better than I thought you would. -Because? Why don't you think I'm an athlete? I am an athlete. off. -You were in a great movie called "Enough Said", so let's play a drinking game Truth or Dare. -I love that. -I'm going to ask you a question. You can respond or say, "I've said enough" and shoot. -Alright. -What is your worst movie? -That is easy. "Troll." -I love "Troll." -Be quiet. ♪♪ It's okay. -We both went to Northwestern.

Sing the fight song of the Northwest. -♪ Go, Northwest ♪ ♪ Fi fa, ba ba, baa ♪ -♪ Keep those colors flying ♪ ♪ We... ♪ -♪ Cha pan, fla bla time ♪ U, rah, rah! ♪ Go, U Northwestern ♪ ♪ Fight for the victory ♪ ♪ Ga bud da day may ♪ ♪ Du ray de may ya ♪ ♪ I'm going to win that game ♪ Whoa! -Wow, wow! -Did you know? Nobody takes a shot for that. - Am I asking you or you? -I'm going to... Who is better? Who is your favorite "Weekend Update" host of all time? -Hey, Tina and Amy. -Her husband presented "Update". - -That's what I'm saying. -Me too! -I know darling. -Damn. -Greetings to Brad. -I love you darling.

I'm sorry. -Tell me a joke from "Late Night" or "Weekend Update" that you loved but couldn't do because it was too offensive. You can remember? Yes, I guess you can. -There's a couple. -Yeah. -A couple in Washington state... ♪♪ -This is an incredible delivery. -A man in Washington state was recently arrested for animal cruelty after he was caught having sex with the family dog. Worse yet, it was make-up sex. -Yes I like that. -Did you know? -Do you know that... you look like Ray Bolger? -From "The Wizard of Oz"? -Yeah. You know? -Scarecrow? -Mm-hmm. I mean this in the best way possible, because... -Oh, yeah, because he was so hot... and you're like...-"You've got that Scarecrow bounce, bro!" Throw in a photo of Ray Bolger.

What are you talking about? Are you saying it in the best way possible? -Yeah. I love Ray Bolger. -The best possible way is 3 out of 10. The best possible Ray Bolger. Very good, we asked everyone. -UH oh. -Oprah or Beyoncé? -Beyonce. I'm sorry. -Excellent. You are the first person to receive a response. -Oh, no one answers? -Yeah. Everyone is too scared and you did it. Are you afraid now? -Terrified. -Alright. Ready? It's the lightning round. I'm going to ask you a question. You have to answer to Jerry Seinfeld or Larry David. -Go! -Who would you like to go to the prom with? -Is there a third option? -No. -Hey, Larry. -Actually?

Well. Excellent. -Hmm. Who would most like to choose an outfit to wear to the Emmys? -German. -Fascinating. -Yeah. -You are in labor. Who do you want to hold your hand while you give birth? -Myself. I'm going to go like this. -Yeah. Fair. -You're in prison. You can make a phone call. -German. -The three of them are having dinner. -It's going to get bad. I can feel it. -The bill arrives. Who picks it up? -Me. -For you. ♪♪ Do they fight with you? -No. Hey, historically, bartenders are known for giving good advice, making you feel better about your problems.

Well? So I will come to you as a bartender and tell you my problem. You are going to read the answer for the first time, for the first time in history, outside of the cards. -Well. - ♪♪ My wife left me. -Boy, I hate to hear that. What was the problem? Did she finally decide...? Have you finally decided to start dating men? -Alright. I forgot to mention who's laughing: if Julia doesn't laugh, I take a drink, and if she laughs, she takes a drink. -Mm-hmm. -Go. -My wife left me. -What happened? Oh no. Don't tell me... he had Lasik, huh? - Okay, I'll give you that one. -Next. -Oh, stop saying "next" like you run this place. -Yes indeed. -I just lost my job. -Oh, the economy is difficult.

Where was your work? -Say it again. -I just lost my job. -Oh. The economy out there is difficult. What was your job? Say it one more time. Guys, it will be good when you hear it. -Oh, I just lost my job. -Oh. Hey buddy. Wow. Well, that's a tough economy. Where was your work? The pathetic factory? I like this character. -I know a few things about you. -Well. -You are an improviser. -Yeah. -You are in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. -Am. -So I'm going to ask you some questions about the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and if you don't know the answer, I would ask you to improvise the answer. -Sure. -Bruce Banner contaminated his blood with that of his cousin, attorney Jessica Walters, during a car accident.

Why wouldn't he take him to court for turning her into She-Hulk? -Why would anyone take someone to court for turning you into She-Hulk? If they turned you into She-Hulk, I love it. -Be a She-Hulk. -Be a She-Hulk. Yeah! -I know, you know, it's a very difficult time. -Do you mind? Min... Do you find it offensive if I shout "preach" while saying this? -Hey, we can try. -Go. -But, I mean, I feel like... -Preach! -Off-screen, between films, Bruce Banner transforms into the Smart Hulk, a combination of his brains and his strength in one body. How does he do it?

How did he do it? -Easily. -Mm-hmm. -He is also gamma radioactive. -Then why does that make it easier? -Well, because you have gamma rays, and they... and it's like... they pick you up and give you a kind of r-r-r-r-r! And then you will be able to transform much more easily. -Do it again. Because? -D-r-r-r-r-r-r-r! -Br-br-br-br-br-br! -Here I think less, more a br-dr-dr-dr. -Dr-zh. Drl-drl-drl-drl. -That's actually not bad. - This was Julia Louis-Dreyfus improvising on Marvel stuff. -Have you been drinking during the break? -Hello everyone, this is one of my favorite people in the world. Her name is Julia Louis-Dreyfus.

I have established it. Anyway, I want to honor her by playing a game called Shotzee. You're going to roll two dice and then whatever comes up, I'm going to pour both drinks into a glass and drink it. And I hope you know that's because I love you. -Sure. I roll him towards the wall. -Just turn it towards... -I am! -And she yells "Shotzee!" when she rolls. Like "Yahtzee." -Shotzee! -And both. -Ah, at the same time. -Okay, we have... -We have... -Red Bull and Manischewitz. -Oh Lord. Poor soul. Health. -You're acting scared. -No, I'm a little worried about your belly. -Because? -Well, I feel like diarrhea is on the way. -Did you know?

I would be happy if my kids had to deal with my diarrhea for once and not the other way around. -Oh, you're a good father. Oh no. - -Shotzee! -What we have? -We have... -White Claw and Mexican Coca-Cola. I think everything will be fine. -What is Mexican Coca-Cola? Can I try some of that? Only up? -Just throw it away- Pour it into a glass for me. -Oh, Christ. That's as flat as Yeah, you take a little diaper. -Just... If you bring it... -Yes, I'll bring it to you. Don't worry. Are you going to go to bed now?

What is your problem? - I have to have my chance. What was it? -Oh yeah. It's Mexican Coca-Cola and White Claw. Let's see if it's good. ♪♪ -Okay? -Yeah. -Well. Do you want to wear a nice diaper? -Yeah. Can I say something before I do it? -Please. This was "A Day Drinking with Seth and Julia Louis-Dreyfus." -Yeah. -Yeah. ♪♪