I'm Funny Because of Grandma | Bill Engvall

Normally when I do shows like this, you know, I interview newspapers or radio stations or whatever and they always ask me the same question, they say well, Bill is your family,

funny

, we say no, no, my family is crazy and that makes me

funny

and The Inbal clan has had crazy coverage for several decades. My grandparents when they were alive. God bless you. My grandmother was crazy as a crazy woman. A wonderful woman you've never met in your life, but she loved to talk. She talked to all of you. I could stand the stool of these walls and they all live in a small town in Texas, a small town called Georgetown Texas and my parents lived there, my sister lived there and my grandparents lived there when they lived and Gail, my wife and I, we both went to college in that little town, so when I was in college, you know, I would go to

grandma

, grandpa's house

because

it was a good free meal and that was the only thing I learned in college and I would go there and it would be the same scenario every day, my grandpa would be sitting in his favorite chair with the newspaper in his hand, my

grandma

would just be walking around the house talking and dare I go on, I'd tell her how you're doing Grandma, well Billy I'm fine.

Okay, I guess they're not throwing dirt on me, yeah, it's a good day. I said what do you do the dishes, well, Bill. I also went to the salon and she said, “Oh really, she says, oh yeah, and I saw Betsey there and Betsey was.” getting a bouffant, man, now Bill, I don't know why you would get a bouffant

because

you have a fat face, well, yeah, you'd think the woman with a fat face and would want that hair hanging all over her forehead. face, but no, now she puts it all on her heads, if you have a big fat bun of hair with those big fat cheeks, I think she has lost her mind, oh, did I tell you this?

They bought a new car, they got it. She won two Chevys but was talked into a Ford. She wanted a black Chevy, but the dealership wants to say that the old black one looks too dirty. You need a brown car, so now instead of a nice black Chevy, he has an ugly brown Ford with a bulging face. hairstyle I think he's lost his mind and my grandfather would just say mm-hmm I'll tell you a story about them when they were getting ready to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary my grandmother told my grandfather she said Rhea I want you to leave Go to Macy's and get yourself a suit because it's a big anniversary.

I want you to dress me like I'm my grandpa like I don't wear a damn suit. I never used an angle, use one now because you should know who my grandfather was. They were boots, overalls and no shirt. true, yes, and that was the church, yes, but you know grandma ruled the house, so she asked him to go get a suit and they celebrated her anniversary. Well, everything was great, unfortunately, nine months later, Grandpa passed away and we were sitting in the funeral home. my grandmother and the funeral director said to my grandmother, she said ma'am, what would you like to bury Ray in? and my grandmother looked at me and said, well, we shopped in that suit.

Oh, guess who I just buried with that and I remember thinking this. The poor guy can't rest, so we buried grandpa and after the funeral we had coffee with my grandma and I said how grandma said listen to me, I said people aren't going to start calling the house now and they're going to ask about grandpa. but they don't really want him, I said ace, we'll make sure he's gone, they'll try to sell you some kind of scam to get your shares or your savings, I said, so do me a favor when they call you. Tell them that Grandpa is in the garden or that he has gone to town or that he will be back later and that they can call him again and talk to him.

So I told him, "Trust me, they won't call me again." I went home about a year later. I was back in town visiting my parents. I stopped by to see grandma and we were sitting there having coffee and she said, "Well, honey, you were right. I said about what she said. Those people called all the time. I said. I told you they would." This guy called once a week for six weeks. I said, "Well, what did he want?" weeks I can ask what this is about and he said oh yes ma'am he said sorry he said I'm from Macy's and I'll just call CL rays and joy in this suit and I started laughing and said what did you say grandma, is she doing okay?

I didn't want to lie to him because the Lord doesn't like liars, so I just said, well, young man, we can't take him and the lion Ji Won away.