GIRL CHAT VAULT: Should Your Man or Mom Come First?

Hello beautiful people I was ready for some

girl

talk that's what I thought that's what I thought very good

first

ashley darby from bravo's the real housewives of potomac has been dealing with a really big problem ashley who helps financially support her mother recently gave her an ultimatum from her fed up husband Michael. Now Michael said he has to make a decision: cut off his mother or end his marriage. I know this is difficult. Ashley, of course, is very torn because she, for one, made vows. Michael for better or worse and wants to make their marriage work but on the other hand, Ashley loves her mother like everyone does the right thing and agreeing to Michael's demand could set an unhealthy precedent of using ultimatums in the relationship to get what you want.

Ladies in a marriage, who do you think

should

come

first

?

your

man or

your

mother, your man all day long, that's why you married him, it even says in the Bible, therefore your man will leave his mother and father and join himself to his wife so that two can be

come

one. meat, it's the word of God because you know my ex is very close to his mother, I'm very close in the eyes, but it's really annoying when you have that third person, that third person in your group, you know when you guys are trying to do it.

I know we are very close, but I cannot allow this woman to be an obstacle, this right now is an obstacle to my marriage and a real mother

should

not feel that she is standing in my way and a real man should feel the need to do so. . Take care of your parents so they can have their own time together. You know what I mean. I was having a hard time relating because I'm like I said before. My mom raised me to be super independent and the reason why. I am like that because she is an example of that in my life.

My mother works to this day. She goes to work every day. I've been working since she was 14 years old. She could have said, “Oh

girl

, you got this, yeah, no.” I don't have to work, as many parents have, but that's not the case. She will still go to where she will retire next year. She's really excited about it, okay, but my thing is, if you're a bombshell mom, you're going to want to see your kid. happy, you want to see their marriage flourish, so I think if the mother knew something like this, she could step back and say, "Let me not even get involved in this, honey, you will have a successful marriage.

I will be fine unless What Lonnie, I know that you will be unless there is some kind of problem where the mom can't work or is physically sick or ill, then the boy has to have a heart Come on, where are you The facial expressions are killing me I need to know what you are. thinking. I mean, I feel like someone pushed me out of their womb. I'm going to help them. Yeah, that's my mom. So, are you saying that between your man or your mom, your mom comes first? and they come. but your mom is just a mom and um, if you can't understand that, you know because they just broadcast that to me, no, don't come between me and my mom, me and my mom are tight, you know she was As a single mother, I feel very different because she was a single mother, she worked very hard and if a man came to me and said no, I mean, I would try to work it out between them, but I don't know if I'm choosing my mom over a guy, that's just me okay I mean if I'm honest this was something that I really had to meditate and study on the word because the Bible says it says in Genesis 2 24 that's why a man lets you meet his father and his mother and he is united with his wife and they become one flesh.

I am very close to my mother. I really appreciate my mother's opinion so I think it's situational and I think both parties should be respectful and empathetic now when I got married um adam and I had to tell ourselves now listen look our family is our priority and you are my priority you know when it comes to my mom because I want to be a good steward of the word but like I said, if I'm honest and this is real, I have to work on it every day, um, but yeah, I'm something that I love, that's the situation, so yes, if it is going to be like that, if my mother needed it. my help financially I'm going to help my mother no matter what she needs that's why I say it's situational now if she had an opinion on something in our marriage about what we were doing and my husband, you know, didn't agree and Maybe I was hesitant and that's when I'm really going to have to like have a conversation with my mom and have a conversation with my husband.

One thing I love about my mother, she is a woman of God, so she understands that verse and that is why. Why do I say yes, but it's usually about respect? I think if we can all do it respectfully, we'll be fine. I'm trying to understand why this man I don't know this case, it seems like it must be like that. extreme where you feel like you have been put second, if we can, there are some people who take advantage of situations and I am just guessing because I don't really know this case either, but in the case where the mother needs help, maybe Maybe she needs food, maybe she needs help, maybe she is sick.

Hello, help your mom. Yes, but if this is now, I need a chinchilla and a carrot, a diamond necklace and she will get all these things. Oh, I want to redo my kitchen. I want an elevator in my house. Well, come on, I really have a lot to do. I have a very close friend whose mother likes to be very involved in her marriage and it is her opinions that she doesn't really know, like her choice. husband, but it's not because she is immoral, she just has a problem that her daughter left her and she doesn't go to her, you all know the advice now, her husband is that person she goes to now in that situation that they literally had . go to therapy and she had to say mom listen to me to survive in this marriage and for this marriage to work you have to say yes and it worked, she and her husband are now happily married, although it was like what is that?

To me, that shows that maybe you don't care about me as much as I thought, saying it's her or me, and that's what I mean, people also say the most important thing in marriage is that my brain doesn't work. that's the word that the other thing people say about marriage that's super important is commitment, marriage is about commitment, so maybe let's not cut out the mom completely, but let's find a financial situation that works for the two and say yes, we can. help your mom, but it's not extreme, it's not that we feel like she's taking advantage or I feel like you are because this woman works well, this is the right thing to do, okay, if my mom needed extra help I would suggest that will take it. an extra job just to help my mom, that's what I would do.

I would do my best if she had done it. She doesn't use her money correctly. Use your money to help or do what I did. Put your mom on Instagram. Let her start. own business and take care of your own account make some good money, speaking of moms, the kardashians mother, kris jenner is currently looking for a personal assistant and it could be you, kris jenner, chris recently partnered with bumble to find a assistant through the the new bumblebiz network feature of the app and all you have to do is apply, all you have to do to apply is swipe right but of course many people on social media immediately began mocking the list, like the Instagram user at Norris Blackbook who reposted Chris' post with the caption Qualified candidates should know how to make a martini, find work for Courtney Coordinate and keep a calendar of the dates of the Rob cut and they must be experts at ignoring the media.

I know questions about pregnancy. Well, Kim even saw that post and jokingly responded with a hands-up emoji. to volunteer for the job, so ladies, I'm curious if you were to hire a personal assistant, what kind of tasks would you have for a personal assistant? What do you need? What would you ask if you had a personal assistant? What are the things? What would you require them to do, girl, I have a list, yeah, I really need help with time management and scheduling, I think it's so that people who can do administrative tasks very well and do them perfectly is very important, it's a big deal.

I would need in my life you know because I can't keep my dates straight and can you guys remember what they are, what you're supposed to do tomorrow or the day before yesterday? You don't remember things anymore, is it just me? Is it my ? age forgets everything that's why they have the notes section on your iPhone everything yeah I'm the only one who can't put my panties on on my own it sounds crazy where are you going with this? I love body spanx, but I promise you it's You, I look like a crazy person in the bathroom alone.

You know when you are alone and you can't understand it and you say I need help, so sometimes I ask my friends to help me if my husband is around. He'll help me, yeah, but I'd put that on the list, girl, that's part of your job description. I need you to help me put on my face. Thank you so much. What else, Adrian? Okay, actually I've been trying to expand my vocabulary so wouldn't it be nice if you could come up with a word of the day you need a teacher a stylist okay, I need to be taught a word today so I can sound smart you know what I'm saying okay, I need them.

Light the candles in the dressing room before I get here. You always like that. I like my candles lit so I need to do that because yes, they should have the scent and the ambience. Okay, I need them to wake up before me to make sure I'm actually awake when I need to be awake oh my gosh alarm clock okay oh they don't have to be available to take you home when you're drunk that would be fun that's over okay I need I need to someone help me I take my photos on social media so they aren't all selfies.

Catch my angles. Your husband is for that. He does it very well. He is discreet. Yes, so far you don't need an assistant. And then I need. someone to make excuses for me when I don't want to go somewhere ah I need a lot you'll ask them to do it okay I'm trying to think oh what I'd like is the moment I get home from work have a glass of wine for me, choose it for me. How are you? I love to cook, but sometimes food preparation is more than the cooking process itself, so I would love for him or her to go to the grocery store and get all the ingredients. a sous chef yeah, the sous chef the food preparation I would also love someone to run me a bath you know like you have the bubbles ready you know uh oh you're not all water no, you're out there thinking I'm thinking, oh, this is it well I always like to take a nap at noon so maybe I have the bed that you know is already open and I like the pillow, like the turn down service in hotels, you can't cover yourself with the blankets, she wants to try to think about my.

I'm just trying to know that we're out of order and the assistant is supposed to help you because you're working so much all day that you haven't worked one bit, I know, but I'm just saying what I would do. so yeah, there you have it, if I manage my time and do my things well, I saved my money, I don't have money for anything, someone else was a Californian, yeah, someone else, yeah, hello, I want to hear what you would have liked you. your help like I wonder what you guys would do, just shout out one thing, what would you like your assistant to do the laundry, walk the dog, yes, do the laundry, can you go to the dry cleaners for that?

Okay guys, to free up your time so you don't have to, you can do other things like you absolutely know or drink something, take care of yourself, yeah, or drink some more, yeah, no, I just don't think we don't know. , okay, amazing, yes, I do it too if you. balance your time, you can figure it out yourself, it's not if you can do it, if you want to, yes, there are many things I could do, but many things I don't want to do, yes, I don't want to get up alone. because then I almost lost my neck doing things like this and you know it's a lie, that's what your husband is for, that's what I thought, you know how unattractive he is, I feel so ugly when I always do it also when you come. and then I have it there like this and I think, oh, when I was single, you know, when you wore really nice outfits and then you came home alone, single, and you couldn't take off the outfit because it required the help of someone else, well, I learned from that one. hanger, you just use a wire hanger, there's a little thing and then just yeah, yeah, it works, I closed it, yeah, yeah, you only told me about it when I was single, I was going to sleep in the dress