Extras Bloopers (Ricky Gervais, Stephen Merchant, Samuel L. Jackson, Ben Stiller, Kate Winslet)

I'd like to see him come at me with that whole "I'm a tough bastard" thing. I'd say, "Put down the baseball bat and send the caregivers home. It's just you and me, skin to skin." Naked to the waist. He starts with me, I will destroy him. Bright. And, again, This time I won't laugh. Exactly the same, I won't laugh. Alright? - Start with me... - I've spoken to real SAS people. He told me what it means. Army Super Soldiers. Well, in "action." Director: Okay. Well, this time, this time. Sorry, Jude, Carl. What does it mean then?

I'm screwed. ! RICKY: Fuck you! (RICKY LAUGHING) First of all, I drank too much. - I think I'm a little screwed. - All ready! - RICKY: Fuck! ) RICKY: Do you know what I laughed at? - Oh, give him another cup. -It's because I don't want to keep drinking it. I can not do this. - What are you talking about? - I can't... Get another cup. I'm not going to allow that. - That? - Fucking disgusting. But otherwise... - Damn recycled tea and gob. - I have to keep drinking the tea. - Take a sip of tea and drink it. - But I've been...

I've been drinking about three cups so far. I was dressed as a genie for a day. DIRECTOR: Yes. Actually, come to your right first, Ricky. Are you okay, John? It's too much for me, Martin. Come on love, you're like a dead horse. Put some minge around it. (TEAM LAUGHING) - That hit me right in the eye. - I'm sorry. And action! - Ready? - Yes, good. The last one to arrive. And action! - It's action. Don't say action. - I won't say action. - Well. Which is a problem. - When you are ready. Good. Ready? Ready?

Attractive. Good. God! Okay, look. Good. Ready? Look. - Come then. - For. Good. Well, here we go. You could be on top of her like a rat in a drain. So that's when... I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry it was so long. Very sorry. - I was... - Having too much fun, huh? - You play in the markets, right? - Oh yeah. - How are you? Any advice? - There is always high interest. - Great interest? - Yes always. Great interest. Bad interest, that's low. That's bad. Low, bad, low interest is bad, yes. Erm... high interest, expensive purchase...

A Midsummer Night's Dream. Downstairs... - Oh, how's your diarrhea? -It's good. Good. There's nothing moving down there anymore. And action! - I once head-butted a horse. - I'm sorry. Why do I hear all this shit about how you think you're tougher than me? Where have you heard this? A guy I've been making a scene with. He thinks you're far away... That screwed him up. Jesus Christ! - Brilliant. - This is nonsense, but men think about it more often. JON: Is it the fact that I have one leg shorter than the other? I had not noticed. - JON: Hadn't you noticed? - Sorry Sorry.

JON: Is it the leg? Is it the fact that I have one leg shorter than the other? - I had not noticed. - Have not you noticed? - What are you doing, Ricky? - I'm just trying not to laugh. There's that thing they teach you in school. - No. - Cha...oh-un...do... That's actually a Cantonese word that means "free spirit." Chan-do. WOMAN: Are we supposed to do that? Action! (thud) Oh fucking hell! LISA: Guide us, Heavenly Father, guide us, over the stormy sea of ​​the world. Guard us, guide us, guard us, feed us because we have no help but You.

I saw Steve laugh, I'm sorry. Don't make a face. - What a face? - You were like that... That's because I'm really trying to see. God! He wasn't even making a face! Wait, friend. Alright. Check this out, you'll love it. Kind of like you... Write 58,008 on a calculator. Put it backwards... - It's funny. - Put it backwards, BOOBS. It is worth taking note. Alright, buddy, come and look at this. I wrote 58,008... Alright, buddy, look at this. I just wrote 58... Fuck me. Sorry this is absolutely scandalous guys, we are two absolute professionals. (RICKY LAUGHS) Cut! Very good, friend.

Just look at this. I just typed 58,008 and surprisingly... Alright buddy, just look at this. Just... Alright, buddy, just look at this. I just wrote... RICKY: This script is hell! Turn it upside down. I just typed 58,008... Alright buddy, just look at this. I can hear you go! Alright, buddy, check this out. I just wrote 58,008, turn it around. TITS. Let's continue from there. Action! The thing is, I don't really think about him. I was eight... What? Are you putting me off? - I can see you out of the corner of my eye. - RICKY: What? Should I get off?

Not well. Not well. RICKY: I can go anywhere, it's not an important scene. Alright? It's okay, I can deal with it. Can you see that? Because I'm going to give the signal... - Okay, we're running. -It's okay, really. Six fucking BAFTAs. (RICKY LAUGHS) - Right. - RICKY: Three for acting, -the other three for... - Yes, of course. Shut up. Sit back and act! RICKY: It wasn't my fault. Nobody looks at me. At any moment a little phlegm will come out. - For! - Does not continue. Hack it. I can't laugh anymore, my head is getting too tense.

Do what you do in Scotland. Continue. Just turn it off. - Well. - I can not do it. No, she has a great...-No, she is not. -It's a hairball. -It's just a cold. - Have you been licking your wig? Just cut there for a moment. I know a woman who would be perfect for you and she is desperate. One more time. Hey! Listen. I know a woman who would be perfect for you and she is... Look at my little hands. What's wrong with her? I keep seeing her there. She has cerebral palsy. Oh, that's another guaranteed Oscar.

Oh really. - Oh really. - Cut, that's all. Then you just pretend you're having sex with her. - I couldn't do that. - Of course you could. Are you an actress. - Did you hear the...? - Yes. - Okay, I'd like to know... - I'm sorry. I'm hungry. That's why I like to take a lunch break around a quarter to ten. If I blew your mom's head off, who would know, your mom's head, and it would just fly off of her, and all that would be left would be... if it blew off... (RICKY LAUGHING) - 20 million? -40, double.

That's how it is. Plus six, 46, three days. 75 days. The greatest Christmas day of all time. ANDY: Bye, nerd. - Am I a nerd? - I'm just bothering you. I'm a nerd. I've kissed Cameron Diaz, Drew Barrymore, I'm a nerd! I slapped Jennifer Aniston on the butt. - Who are you? - Nobody. - WHO? - Nobody. Nobody. - Nobody. - Nobody. - Who are you? - Well. Who are you? - Applause board. - Well. 3-46, take four. Cameras A and B. Get out of the way, because you shouldn't be in this, it'll look weird. IAIN: Are you aware that I am gay?

Not that... And you don't sing or dance. You're not going... I'm not... No, I'm not... It didn't matter. Well, no, you didn't... And you don't sing or dance. You don't say, "Ooh, hello! I'm..." No, it's not relevant. Are you aware that I am gay? No, because you don't sing or dance. You're not all like... Because you don't make a song and dance about it. You're not everything... (Wheezing) Damn hell. Why don't you make a song and dance. You're not all... "Hi, I'm gay." Well, you don't make a song and dance about it. You're not all... (Wheezing) Oh, come on!

Well. Well, wait a minute, wait a minute. Well. Are you aware that I am gay? Oh God! - Are you aware that I am gay? - No. Because you don't make a song and dance about it. Not everyone is... (STRANGLED) "Hello everyone, look at me." Sorry, I don't know what I'm doing. This time. This time. Well. Come on. Are you aware that I am gay? It is not a problem. Are you aware that I am gay? - Are you aware that I am gay? - No. No, because you don't use... It's not like you're saying, "Oh, everyone, oh, look.

Can you guess?" No, i do not do it. - LES: I can't marry her. - Because? What do you know? - Nothing. What do you mean? - No, what did you say? It's just that I've been thinking a little bit and I just don't think... Just wait a second. Oh, I've been in that lamp so long I'm beyond recognition. - Who are you? - Well, I'll be whoever you want me to be, but you can call me Genius. How does someone as big as you fit into this small lamp? Don't worry, I'm used to getting into tight holes.

WISHY: Can you help us? We are in danger. - We heard him say that he wants to get Aladdin. - Don't we all do it? That's mental! That's mental! We asked 100 people: "Will Les Dennis ever hold on to a bird?" Our survey said... We asked... We asked 100 people: "Will Les Dennis ever hang from a bird?" Our survey said... We asked 100 people: "Do you want to go out tonight and see Les Dennis in panto?" Our survey said... How crazy is that? Oh, look at this website about... Would that have been funny, him going through customs, "I have nothing to declare except my temper?" "Oh!

And this vibrating tongue to please..." "Oh! And this vibrating tongue to please bottoms! Oh!" Is that funny? Well, again, there's something special about it when you do it, but it's Sunday, so let's keep the butts to a minimum. Do it. # All you want to do is walk around Sally # - Sing it with me now! -#Ride, Sally, ride# -What are you doing? - Just singing a song. # Ride, Sally, ride # - What are you doing? - We just sing a little. # All you want to do is walk around Sally # - Sing it with me now! -#Ride, Sally, ride# -What are you doing? - We just sing a little.

He looked like Beaker from the Muppets. - Sing it with me now! -#Ride, Sally, ride# -What are you doing? - We just sing a little. No, you can't do that. # All you want to do is walk around Sally # - Sing it with me now! - #Riding... # - Are all your clothes falling off? - Yes. They fall to the floor and she struggles to put it back on. But before she can put her panties on... She... They fall off completely. She's struggling to put them back on, but before she can put her panties on... What are yours about, if you don't mind me asking?

Well, it's... What's the best way to explain it? Have you seen me in X-Men? I'm so sorry, Patrick, I expected that. Very sorry. She's struggling to put them back on, but before she can put the panties on, I... I'm walking down the street and I see this beautiful girl, and I think I'd like to see her naked... I'm so sorry, Patrick, no I know what I'm going to do. I don't know what to do other than leave the scene and let you talk to a teddy bear. No, you see, I can do other things too. For example, I'm riding my bike in the park and this policewoman says...

And she says, "Ah!" and she is covering herself. And she kept trying to cover herself, but anyway I've seen it all and I get on my bike and go. On the grass. Okay, so that's you hanging around, looking at tits and stuff? - Ask me again, ask me again. - Well. And he scored the winning goal. They take me to the dressing room and there are Rooney and Beckham - and then Posh Spice comes in and... - Are your clothes falling off? Instantly. I thought I got away with it. I tried to look there. Well, what's up with this?

I'm kind of a James Bond figure. And I have to go to Iraq to rescue some hostages. And I get there and they're all women. And they are naked because all their clothes have rotted. Sure. Well, what's up with this? I'm kind of a James Bond figure. And I have to go to Iraq to rescue these hostages. And I get there and they're all women. And they were naked because their clothes had rotted. And I rescue them anyway and put them on the helicopter. I rescue them anyway and put them on the helicopter. And even though I'm flying the helicopter, I can sneak a look in the mirror and I can see them, you know?

And one of them is leaning... - You see... - Ridiculous. What about Jono Coleman? I thought he was up for it. Yeah, but since he got into Celebrity Fit Club... Well, he's just not fat enough. I'm sorry. What about Jono Coleman? I thought he was up for it. Yeah, but since he got into Celebrity Fit Club... Well, he's just not fat enough. What about Jono Coleman? I thought it was... What's up with Jono Coleman? I thought he was up for it. Yeah, but since he got into Celebrity Fit Club he's... Well, he's not fat enough. Keep going.

What about Jono Coleman? I thought he was up for it. Yeah, but since he got into Celebrity Fit Club he's... Oh, God. Wait. Well, this is it. Well. Do you know where I can find a quiet place? Now you know what I'm thinking? How fat fucking Jono Coleman is. Every time I see him in that pool like a little baby hippo. One for the DVD?