Coronavirus VII: Sports: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)

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tonight

concerns

sports

. I think OJ Simpson used to be famous because the corona virus has taken its toll on all kinds of industries, but the world of

sports

was one of the hardest hit from the beginning and perhaps most visibly, because just think about the day when That The first time you realized that our lives were going to fundamentally change for a while for many was when this happened two days before I tested positive for

coronavirus

. Utah Jazz star Rudy Gobert did this before reporters' microphones in an interview and this morning the NBA suspended the rest. of his season, the unprecedented move surprised everyone, including Dallas Mavs owner Mark Cuban, just think about how surprising something has to be to surprise Mark Cuban, keep in mind that he is one of the Sharks in Shark Tank, they have offered him business deals such as renting a goat, a service he rents. take out goats to eat overgrown bushes squirrel boss a bird feeder that gives electric shocks to squirrels and elephants chat a literal stuffed elephant that you place in the room to indicate that there is something uncomfortable to talk about Mark Cuban has already seen the most amazing inconceivable things this world has to offer and it wasn't just that basketball suddenly disappeared since then, the NHL suspended its season.

Major League Baseball delayed its opening day until an unknown day. The international soccer league suspended the games and the Olympics were moved to next summer and as shocking as these cancellations seemed at the time, the truth is that there really was no other option. Sporting events with large crowds are the exact opposite of social distancing and there is a nightmare scenario during a pandemic. This Champions League match in Milan in February was later compared to a biological bomb after it was linked to one of the deadliest outbreaks, but shutting down those sports was emphatically the right thing to do.

People have been asking more and more when they can return and few have a better defense than this guy. I hope football can start and me. I told them: I think you could do it. It is very possible that they can. I hope they can start and I hope they can start with the people in the stands. The fans want to come back. They know they want to watch basketball, baseball and football. and hockey they want to watch their sports we have to get our sports back I'm tired of watching baseball games when I was 14 but I haven't really had much time to watch them I would say maybe I watch a hitter and then I get back to work okay, but This is what we actually asked some experts about it and it turns out that when countries are in the midst of a pandemic that is killing thousands of Americans every

week

, the correct number of 2006 hitters for the president to be looking at is actually zero, but look, he's not entirely wrong, the lack of sports is an emotional blow for many people and it's not just emotional but also financial, according to one estimate the sudden disappearance of sports will erase at least 12 billion dollars in revenue and hundreds of thousands of jobs in this country alone and those jobs are not just those of the well-paid athletes who play in the games, but they also include many people who depend on sporting events for jobs like these for Philadelphia Stadium workers.

Marvin's Spratly earned $14 an hour. As a part-time cook for almost two years at Sixers Flyers and Eagles games, it's a lot of stress for me. A lot of stress is how that baby needs cuddles. Nyesha Johnson is a maintenance worker at Phillies games. I have food on the table. Now I'm doing okay right now but I don't know what a little Merlot can bring, yeah that's really tough and it's worth remembering that even though Philly sports fans are a horde of inhuman monsters who don't deserve neither sympathy nor understanding, people pay them. Those monsters tend to really rely on their monstrous money, so since the absence of sport has caused so much pain, we thought

tonight

we'll take a look at what sports have become in the age of

coronavirus

and what it could be a way back for them, and first Let me tell you that the world of sports has been doing some really wonderful things during this pandemic, teams and athletes have been donating and raising money for charities and some have even sold branded face masks for causes related to the coronavirus and, despite not being able to play, the teams have found ways. to stay engaged with their fans online while modeling social distancing in the Pittsburgh Pirates Parrot posted a home workout video, Chicago Blackhawks mascot Tommy Hawk vacuumed his apartment, and Gritti once again blew them away without even trying, okay, I don't know what it is.

Most surprising is the Gritties' incredible hand-eye coordination, the fact that it appears to live in a completely empty apartment, or the discovery that its body occasionally squeaks when it moves, presumably because, evolutionarily, the relative Gritties' closest is a used dog toy and it's not just pets that athletes have. have been showing how they are trying to work from home, which hasn't always been easy for them, for example, reigning NBA MVP Yanni, and Entercom Poo told reporters

last

month that he hasn't been able to practice because he can't He has a hoop in his house. have had to be quite creative to continue their training, whether it's an Olympic swimmer training in a kiddie pool with a bungee cord, an Olympic runner creating makeshift treadmills in a bathtub with Palmolive, an Olympic climber using his home as a fitness gym. climbing or Brandon Coin of the Orioles squatting with his dog, who seems completely delighted with the situation, but not all training sessions at home go smoothly, as Dodgers pitcher Joe Kelly recently discovered, wondering how things are going. quarantines.

Joe is working on a change, yes, honestly, if I were Joe Kelly's wife, I would. I never fixed that window and just made him explain what happened every time someone came over. Oh, that window Joe, do you want to tell that story? Because I forget some of the details, like how many millions of dollars they paid you. your ability to throw a baseball accurately, how big the net was and how many feet you missed, just go ahead and tell the story while I watch the video, as broadcasters that rely on live events are now in a situation Truly desperate. situation as ESPN progressed its 10-part documentary on Michael Jordan, otherwise they had been limited by content airing versions of baseball and basketball video games with SportsCenter at one point tweeting this, now you might be wondering what I just watched well apparently . that came from a Russian show called Stoned Faces where the contestants slap each other as hard as they can and this particular guy is a renowned competitive slapper whose real name doesn't matter because his nickname is dumpling, which is just an exceptional name for that man and At this point I don't need to know anything else.

I'm all in on competitive slapping, just tell me which channels to subscribe to to watch it and where to order my Dumpling Jersey, so if we're all getting to the point of desperation where we're sincerely willing to watch big men slap each other in a windowless room, there is clearly a desire to restart sporting events, although the question is not why sports should return, but how that can happen safely, because doing it responsibly would be a mammoth task to do it irresponsibly, without It's pretty easy, though: the state of Florida designated professional sports and media production with a national audience as an essential service from the beginning, as long as it's closed to the general public, so WWE has continued on the scene. shows in Florida holding matches in front of empty chairs, but that requires a lot more people than just those two wrestlers, you need production teams working together Inc proximity and although the WWE maintains that its security measures are as comprehensive as possible, one employee wrote a Anonymous letter to a Florida county commissioner asking them to stop filming because despite health precautions we can't maintain social distancing and have to touch other people, but it's easy to see why CEO Vince McMahon doesn't care that take that risk, as he told investors.

On a recent earnings call, viewers want to see new matches. I think new content is always a factor in terms of stimulation. Something interesting will happen, obviously everyone is hungry for new content. It is very possible that you are tired of watching Netflix. and what if they don't know, well first I would say the risks of creating content the way you seem to outweigh the benefits right now and secondly no one on that call registered your point because you just said stimulating strong. male underwear and, crucially, driver, all in the same sentence, at which point everyone's minds immediately went to being completely crushed by Adam, the driver chokeslam me to hell, nasty shed, stick your jaw down my throat, inevitably, you drive fast. side note here, many of you might wonder where I'm going with this if you're similar to my stuff, you're asking questions like is this sexual or is this violent and then you're dissatisfied when the answer is yes, if you like my wife, I might ask you: should I be worried about this?

Your concern only grows when the answer is only if you want to be and what if Adam Driver himself is upset by this continued sexualization? He seems like a pretty private guy who is generally uncomfortable with attention. making what I'm doing possibly some form of harassment, he might actually have very good reasons to have me legally reprimanded, to which I tell him to put a long term restraining order on him begging me to stop his threatening hindrance and it's not It's just that WWE, its competitor Aew, is also taping shows in Florida and that the UFC just

last

week

began hosting fights in Jacksonville and, although they couldn't bring in international fighters for that, its president Dana White has come up with a crazy solution.

Fight Island is a real fight island. something real, it's really happening, the infrastructure is being built right now on the island. I'm ready to go. Yes, apparently the UFC is building a facility on a private island they are now calling Fight Island. It's a clever name. Perfect name, yes, because it's the first thought an idiot would have if they wanted to name a private island where fights happen. Now we could have called it Hamas Fight or Raucous Port or We Are Maui or Slam Miguel, but it didn't. do that and didn't even choose the obvious name for an island where you held UFC fights, which is just UFC, look at me Dana, why didn't you just call it UFC?

It's perfect, but clearly hosting events is risky right now. The day before last weekend's UFC event, a fighter had to withdraw after he and two of his corner men tested positive, underscoring the fact that if you want to make a completely risk-free return, that's just not It's possible right now, and yet it feels real to many sports organizations. pressure to ignore that risk, especially college sports where some schools' sports programs rely heavily on football revenue, and one would expect coaches to talk about the trade-offs between risk and safety with some tact. Oklahoma State football coach Mike Gundy seemed completely comfortable saying the quiet parts are loud in my opinion, if we have to bring our players back, give them a try, they're in good shape, they're all 18 19 20 21 22 years old, They are healthy, many of them can fight it with their natural body, their antibodies and the bill they have, we must continue to budget and execute money in the state of Oklahoma.

Jesus Christ, I don't know who's worth medical advice in the middle of a pandemic, but who doesn't care. on the page, college students contracting a life-threatening disease so everyone else can make millions is near the end along with the advice of the funeral home magnate and the coronavirus wearing a fake mustache, not now. I later apologized for those comments, but there was a Honestly, their profits are a powerful motive here, especially for some team owners who won't be the ones taking the risks and that's why major sports like baseball and football They are so enthusiastically pursuing comeback plans, but assuming it can be done.

Not just hosting all the events in Jacksonville or on some island with a stupid name somewhere, how do you do it in the safest way possible? Well, for what it's worth, Anthony Fell Chee has explained how that could happen. There is a way todo it. Nobody comes to the stadium. them in big hotels, you know, wherever you want to play, keep them very well watched and mainly under surveillance, but test them like every week and make sure they don't end up infecting each other or their family and just let them play all season. Yes, you just isolate everyone involved and test them thoroughly, which intuitively seems like it might work.

After all, we already have a program where a group of people with incredible bodies are monitored around the clock to make sure they don't touch each other. Yeah. It's said to be too hot to handle and it's perfect. One of the attractive idiots proposed to one of the other attractive idiots with a Ring Pop and if you haven't seen this show and you're still complaining that you're lacking content, you're out of his mind and ideas along the lines of what that he felt he just proposed, the so-called bubble leagues, have been raised for multiple sports in Major League Baseball, for example, at one point it was reported that he was discussing plans to play all of his games in Arizona and in his Face that seemed simple , you just isolate teams and have them play without fans, but when you think about that for more than a second, everything becomes much more complicated.

Selectors, of course, you wouldn't just be isolating players. do that for the coaching staff, team doctors, trainers, referees, clubhouse attendants, bus drivers, camera crews and hotel staff, to name just a few, according to one estimate, even in a league it would take almost 10,000 people, all of whom would need constant testing and there is a key distinction here because, while professional wrestlers are UFC fighters and college athletes do not have a union, those in major professional sports do and, Therefore, they have significant bargaining power, so if you want them to isolate themselves from their families and put their lives at risk, you need their agreement and some big names like the Angels, Mike Trout, still have some major concerns, What are you doing, family members, my wife is pregnant, what am I going to do and you know she goes into labor, will I have to quarantine? for two weeks after my return because obviously I can't miss the birth of their first child, yes you are right, the league should not ask anyone to miss the birth of their first child, that is a magical moment, now the second son is negotiable same day different a third child I'm not even sure the mother has to be there, but that first child is simply unmissable and after rejection from several players, Major League Baseball backed away from the Arizona idea and one official even said as much earlier this month.

I'd be lying if we said we had a good idea, they're all degrees of bad and that's true for so many current proposals for sports to return, the moment you start reading the details of any plan it automatically becomes ridiculous. MLB's new idea is to play a shortened season in as many empty stadiums as possible, but teams would still have to travel to those locations, which means they are not being quarantined and to get an idea of ​​how easy it is. that something goes wrong. Germany, that country, has handled this pandemic much better and is in a very different situation than we are in the US and that allowed their soccer league to return this weekend employing a sort of bubble league approach without fans and with the entire team.

Staff were quarantined in a hotel, but two players have already tested positive, forcing the entire team to isolate for 14 days and a top coach missed the first game after leaving the hotel to buy toothpaste and now You cannot rejoin your team until you have two negatives. tests and that shows how difficult it is to do any of this effectively and look I will own the fact that I really want sports to come back there is no doubt that they have the ability to inspire one of the things that sport does best is bringing people together in times of crisis like when the Yankees resumed play after 9/11, unfortunately not bringing people together is exactly what we shouldn't be doing right now and what sport was really helpful at the beginning of this crisis for Showing us how serious this virus was if it comes back too soon and irresponsibly won't be an inspiration, it will be a warning, so as hard as it is to hear, we may need a little more time to make sure we're doing the right phases. in sports. slowly coming back with tailored approaches that take into account every level of sporting contact and robust test and trace systems, and I know there's an absence in people's lives right now, so ideally what you'd want is something that could fill that gap for a while you know, until sports can return somewhat with an existing infrastructure, a fast-paced event calendar, a passionate fan base and no human contact, something I'm obviously building on, if you've been on Twitter lately, it's possible that you have seen this viral video. in the box and there is often a head to head race up there in the front the whole comet hits the divider the dimmer slows it down and it falls back to third place now under the clutches of the deep ocean so the reflector is outside. from the net, the tarantula takes the lead, oh yes, let me introduce you to the Marble Bronze yellers, they are based in the Netherlands and are a competitive marble racing league that, to put it mildly, is absolutely fantastic.

They upload races to this YouTube channel regularly. and no one we've shown this to, including non-sports fans, hasn't ended up wanting to see more. There are entire race tracks with marbles as fans, plus a marble tournament with 16 different events with relays, water courses and obstacles, and there are also backstories for the marbles involved and some really passionate fans 20,000 people from all over the world tuned in live to watch last week's race and the yellow marble races The YouTube channel has millions of views there are large fan bases created not only for the teams but also for the individual marbles and when one is not performing very okay in the season, you'll hear it there and you'll know, let Marvel know that they have to up their game a little bit now, on the one hand, that's awesome on the other.

By the way, the marbles don't really need the fans to tell them when they're out, take a look at the midnight fireworks, they came fourth in their debut season and just missed the podium, but they made do with that, no no they did it. They came back the following year and won everything, they use their flaws as motivation to come back even stronger or more rounded. I don't know which adjective is better for marbles. The point is that this is not just a YouTube distraction, it is a beautiful competitive event and the world needs them more than ever right now, this is the Marple league tournament, it will actually start next month, unfortunately, as the Times are tough, the league was fighting for money, he even tweeted to convert the Mafia League, we need sponsors as main sponsors and some smaller sponsors, so This Beautiful Thing is in danger of disappearing just when we need it most.

Rather, I was in danger because it turns out that they are no longer looking for a sponsor and the reason I know is that you are looking for the new sole sponsor. of the upcoming Marvel League tournaments, that's right, we are proud to sponsor all 16 events over the next few months, but it weighs because here is a twist, in addition to our sponsorship, the winner of each event will receive $5,000 donated to a food bank in your name. whether they're called the Raspberry Racers, the Green Ducks, the Haze or even the Oceanics, though frankly they're going to need a lot of locker room reorganization because they were a disaster last year and what's more, at the end of it all The overall winner will receive a $20,000 donation made on behalf of his or her marble team to the International Rescue Committee.

It's the only way we can think of to make what these guys are doing even better, so please check this out and tonight last week Preserve, Hazers are coming. to the leading green ducks in the water, now they have a lot of trouble moving through those fast chicanes to start and the wild sliders keep their momentum, fall in the final, other rasberry racers trying to fight for gold in the sporting event del Summer has arrived, we were down, dogfighting section, raspberry runners, they take the lead, neck and neck, Marble League Twenty20, premiering on June 21, this one is for all the marbles you can handle.