Comedians on Morning TV = Awkward & HILARIOUS

You and I should watch a movie during rush hour, so I'm glad you're here in Texas for the brief time when the weather will be a perfect 70. This is like the Golden Age of global warming right before the polar ice caps melt. and we all drown, you have to enjoy these January days at 70 degrees. Why can you go out? It's true, you know she was reading a little bit about you and she says you have a tendency to go with your first thought, yeah. because reading makes you sleepy, that's right, my first thought is that this is the best week to be here the week before the Super Bowl, that's so true for all the horrors that fly, you know, yeah, I just want to get up, I want to get out from here. before that, which is true, this is like the Oscars for prostitutes, okay, all week, let's remember Rick, you provoked here, so we'll go back to his favorite topic because what am I saying, what am I talking about ?, don't think about what I'm wearing, these things are official, okay, I'm distracted, what do you think that gesture means? blacks fool me and say you can't say that.

I was like why don't I know his name and then I choose Wendell's name. I'm doing fine, hey Wendell, the gay guy says I can't call you the black guy. but you're not doing all your burpees, I'm sure we can say no, but I was you, you're the only person here in my career that got this close to my face. He really liked that car, you're very nice. I know, does that mean it doesn't matter? Well, yeah, we're all figuring that stuff out, it doesn't feel like that, no, yeah, your energy is like it's too strong.

I have a relationship that is going very well, really, yes, for how long? They've been together four years and it's strong, it's very clear, yes, and she's much better than you, so your Christian background is part of the shower, yes, and I wanted to talk to you about Jesus later, well, the only reason why that I mention it. Like some people thought maybe you went too far, you know, they thought maybe you were being disrespectful to the Christian religion, so I'm telling you to go, oh my gosh, did you feel respectful? just you were having fun with some of the crucifixes and stuff I don't even know what, yeah, I mean, maybe we made two jokes about it, yeah, exactly, don't you think the Catholic Church went too far?

I am more so than my cartoons and I listen to a couple of jokes. I know this is a

morning

show. You can't mention all those crimes. You know what technologists just kept moving them? You know, like those orcas at SeaWorld that kill a trainer, then transfer him to Seattle, they don't give him his background. I don't totally follow it, but I don't know what I'm talking about. It's a

morning

show. I understand. I know there's a writers' strike. I was wardrobe and makeup people I dated a girl who was so dumb at one point she was literally the dumbest girl she was scared to eat pizza alone she was scared she would choke and I wouldn't be there that's not what made her dumb she literally I asked her what time she goes, she will be a flight attendant, she goes, the Concorde, that will be the sound of this, it feels like when they try, they can't hear anything.

I was like, yeah, yeah, that's right, all boards prefer to ask. I, please relax because they are very nice. Wow, bumpy, yeah, you're on TV, please don't, Larry, you look good, baby, you look good, you know, that was right during the commercials, someone told me that Larry loves Duran Duran, this It is another fact. about Larry, that's boring, boring. I heard you work hard to lose that Boston act. Too bad, you can't lose face, huh, so I want to give you a little test, okay, because you can't look at my script, but it's okay, there are some very famous cereal box icons and I want you to be able to look at some of these characters and see if you can determine what cereal it is associated with, if you understand it right, you will hear this if you understand it. wrong, you'll hear this, oh geez, okay, let's see the first one, you'll see the monitor down here, let's see the first one, okay, oh, he's behind us, sorry, I was behind, yeah, who's that guy?

No, it is not. you look like him, that's for redheads, that's a racist symbol right there, he's like the quaker mix guy, yeah, lucky charms, BAM, look at that, good for you, okay, one drink, one, okay, new, this guy, that's him, yeah, that's the good one, that's one of the founding fathers who said all men are created equal as long as they're white, right? He's one of those guys that's not all there is to do in the world. I've had a wish list that I've made. everything jumped out of a plane with Rachael Ray I fought a bear I was the first person to jump out of the stratosphere I jumped off the highest stadium in the world in Africa whatever you call it Travel Channel yeah farting disabled was the dumbest thing I've ever done fact I would never do it that again you can't now what can I say you make traffic sexy you really do in fact I think I feel a rubber collar in my pants speaker Val traffic I think I see an accident above Robin's head no I look well it's for perimenopausal women I think they look at me and say oh that guy wouldn't deceive me he has a life insurance policy he will die in 10 years I can live my dreams as a young Spanish boy, here something of real conscience happened, no, yes, It's called conversational because you're a professional fun-seeker, why respond to someone who is being negative to you on Twitter?

Because it's funny, someone told me that if a bear ever attacks you, all you have to do is pinch. His nipples are that true or didn't you know? The first thing you know is that it's the brightest thing in the world. Sorry, it's great. You have softer skin. Thank you. This is the first time we've met. I can't imagine the next time you do it. I can escape by sitting on my head I love this morning's shows, my favorites I apologize, I apologize, what do you think anyway? I like to connect something. I'm fine, just look at me right now.

Okay, we're on a TV show. I'm into full American comedy. I'm at the American comedy troupe all weekend, okay, and I know you'll be there. And number two, I like to promote my podcast, it's called Tiger Belly and number three, I'm talking about a show called Love That. Judd Apatow produces There's a Lot of Drugs and I play a guy named Truman and we did the second season, so it's going to be great whenever he plays in San Diego just to do this show. I received a kiss on the ankle. Bob Bobby Lee, why are you looking?

Yo, why are you staring at me, why are you staring at me, oh my God, in all the years I've done interviews, you smell so good?