Clarkson Making Fun of Americans Compilation #1

If this were America, it would be full of people doing whatever they do, incest, mostly God, Florida is horrible, nasty bugs, old people, fat people, a lot of people offering you cheese, you want cheese with that black cheese and then you shoot. He also says he has a completely flat stomach, the only thing in America that has good news for rural inbreds this week, hum the people who make those huge pseudo-military SUVs, you know, this sort of thing, they've come out with a new range. of aftershave and smelly things there it is hammer is the first name that is brilliant look at that there you go good well you open the top you listen to the sound guaranteed it will not repel your sister yes well you say it was a holiday but in reality it was a fly by car on vacation so it wasn't a vacation at all because of course you get to the car rental counter and there's the dumb man with the spiky hair and he types war and peace on his computer for 16 hours and then he doesn't know where England is and steals your driving license and then directs you to a parking lot where your car is not.

The problem is that Americans aren't good with colors, so they get you, basically, you pay a fortune for the damn thing and they say you can have it in red, white, black, yellow or blue, what do we think? stable, it's just very fast, good news from the United States, land of the free, and they have announced in Florida that it is now legal, that is legal. Letting motorcyclists ride their motorcycles without helmets as long as they can prove they have ten thousand dollars worth of health insurance, well that's just stupid, apart from anything else, what's the point of insuring Americans?

There's nothing in it, yeah, Miami, home to all of this year's most successful drug dealers, Mr Big Mac and Silicon Valley, all very glamorous. I was in the United States a couple of years ago filming at this place in Texas, which is the largest car dealership in the world. The storefront is a mile long and I told the guy I owned what you sell here and it was, we sell a lot and he mispronounced every one of the auger hundy mitsubushi toyota nissan jaguar bmw every one of them was wrong and you call it I'd rather be I agree with you Americans are very bad.

In some things they can't say aluminum and they can't win a war without our help, but the delinquent motorsports park is unusual in the United States because it has left turns and some right turns too. , perhaps that is why it also remained deserted. complicated for the colonials or maybe they had all been killed some say it's a CIA experiment gone wrong and he only eats cheese all we know is that he's not the stick but he's Stig's American cousin. The corvette enthusiast in the United States is pretty heavy, yes. They are, they are bigger gentlemen, well, one of them visited the museum this week and this happened like a mania and we said a couple of years ago that this is the best road in the world, yet many Americans say and tend to know everything what it is. good case down here an m16 and a republican vote american steering wheel you are american oh you can't be you know when they are fat enough peter hemi v8 and it will be rubbish how can you know you haven't driven it?

They still built it because it's American. All American cars are obvious. I was there the other day and drove that Chrysler 300c srt8. He really threw that thing. Yes, horrible in every way. Remind me who the last four teams in the world cup were. female european finalists at wimbledon both male european finalists both europeans everything anyone does in any walk of life is done better by europeans and the same goes for the cars awarded, except for american muscle cars, which only

americans

, why What would you want an American muscle? If you're thinking about coming to America, this is what it is, you console yourself, you have your best western, you have your red lobster where you eat, everyone is very fat, everyone is very stupid and everyone is very rude, it's not. the holiday show is the truth I have been filming in America I'm right yes I went to America a lot and I had a lot of things to tell you about America and then I got there and everyone backstage is American well that's a enchanting place.

Well, no, no, see, I'm going to see if you've done it when you meet Americans because you're not a fan of America, are you, or of American culture? No, I don't know, I don't really know because, as you well know, and I'm sure anyone who's been to the United States knows, it's when you get to that Mr. Big Mac who runs the immigration desk and you know you can't be funny, you can't be cheeky, you have to do it because you know he's going to send you to the back of the line, well this changes, yeah, so we have in America, this is very literal in America, well, they don't have them there to anyone who speaks other languages, which is why American cars always have the words for what is written. on the switches it says cigarette lighter horn lights, while everywhere else in the world where there are other languages ​​they are symbols, yes, that's how stupid they are, they are very literal, it's like they call glasses, glasses, glasses they have to specify. where they go in your face no, but any other word is wrong, I mean vest no, no pants, no, and then it gets to the cars, sedan hood, fender, interstate highway, sidewalk, trunk, trunk, trunk is on the front of an elephant, not the back of a saloon, but They have no idea about gas, gas, they call it liquid gas.

There are other examples of this American character too, for example in most cars all the buttons have symbols so you know what everything does, but in this everything is written in English because of course everyone speaks English , It is not like this? Someone at Cadillac came across what in America is a very rare book called an atlas. In it they found many strange and exotic places that were not America and one of these places was a continent called Europe and in Europe they found a country called Germany and in Germany they found something called the Nurburgring and it is also not the fact that if you buy an American car you will to having to commit acts of love with your cousin and the entire space frame is made of aluminum, whatever it is, the system shows the fast food icons.

The first thing that goes to the default setting is fast food. How American he is, he can't find London, he can't find France, but he will find you an Iraqi hamburger restaurant. Well that. shut up, from south to south, it's Christian's short hair, they don't like communists, they really have an iron in efficiency. Honestly, I think in certain parts of the United States now people have started to mate with vegetables, what they will do is they will remove all the indoor carpets radio that saves 40 pounds or that in the United States is lunch, isn't that who said hungry?

TRUE? You're thinking no, they are consistently ugly across their range of cars and are designed by Americans who have the aesthetic ability of giraffes, which means that zero to 60 will be less than four seconds and the best thing is that it makes you 27 more attractive to your sister. Why would the South Koreans use Hammersmith nuclear weapons? I use American guidance systems again. It's basically below. It's a mercedes slk it was designed by a british person and it's been built in germany so it's a car that america can be proud of can you really save the car if you crash it apparently not?

Uh, here's one that crashed and you can't see it. I stumbled upon an American's butt burger. He dropped his styrofoam charcoal and, oh, hell, I went and met my wife. One of her cheeks did that. Can you play rugby in it? Yeah, no, rugby, it is if you're watching in the United States. Rugby is a bit like American football, only it's played by men, so we really have two best pieces of advice for you tonight, one yes, you can buy it instead of renting it and two, don't go to America.