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Calculate your pet's HP with my 100% legitimate formula | Unraveled

May 29, 2021
is life quantifiable each breath each heartbeat count as beads tirelessly etched into the stone of our existence until one day that stone is returned to dust there is a number an algorithm underlying the spark of life and if given the chance to learn the arcane secrets of that algorithm would you use that power forever or would you use it to

calculate

your

pet's hp because that's what i would do hit points what are they and how do they become the standard unit of life in almost all games all started with war games Board games involving a large number of small miniature military forces fighting on a battlefield in the 1920s.
calculate your pet s hp with my 100 legitimate formula unraveled
An early form of this was created by the naval war school to help assess the battles before fighting. They had a stat called life that was determined by how many 14 inch shells a vessel could take so that's what a hit point is how many 14 inch shells it would take to kill you each living creature is a hit point in the end but that's not our current understanding of hp which came about when wargaming shrank and scope and started to become more fantasy oriented in the older games you rolled dice and then

your

troops would survive or die you had big swaths of nameless troops so you could do this without feeling any remorse for their deaths or when these games stopped playing with hundreds of troops and instead focused on just a few main characters, players realized they didn't want their characters died, so your character's hit point was born. could survive a number of bad roles before throwing them away, so hit point really wasn't made to quantify how easy something is to kill, it was born out of compassion and wanting to see your characters grow and prosper and then also find out how easy it was to kill them.
calculate your pet s hp with my 100 legitimate formula unraveled

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calculate your pet s hp with my 100 legitimate formula unraveled...

We've had something resembling hp for almost a century, but we haven't updated our real-world understanding of what a hit point looks like, so I'll do that specifically. so you can quantify your pet's hp a little disclaimer up front i'm not giving you this algorithm so you can fight your pets animal abuse is wrong and if you need me to tell you i'm glad i told you too I am. I'm not teaching you how to

calculate

human hp because that power is too great to wield and could easily be used for evil by some of the most evil forces on earth, like health insurance companies.
calculate your pet s hp with my 100 legitimate formula unraveled
No, I'm teaching you how to calculate your pet's hp for fun. bonding exercise between you and your animal or in case you are at a house party where you don't know anyone but the hosts have a dog and instead of just sitting in the corner pretending to text people, you can spend your time calculating that dog's hp which is a much more normal thing to do in a social situation now it's time to investigate how we are going to effectively calculate any pet's hp luckily there are plenty of games covering almost all the types of pets you could. possibly have but i'll be using pokemon as the main pet analogous to hp because it's literally about having lots and lots of pets that you can love and care for and i'm ignoring all the other stuff and that brings us to our first kind of criteria according to the national pet owner survey These are the most common types of pets found in US homes.
calculate your pet s hp with my 100 legitimate formula unraveled
I appreciate they included a category called small animals as if that meant anything, so we're changing a few things. The standards are still there. Dog, cat, fish and all aquatic creatures. small animals are becoming small mammals for things like ferrets and rabbits. We also include bugs because I love bugs and if you have bugs in your house and you make a conscious decision to want those bugs in your house, they are not pests. re pets amphibians for frog people farm animals covers any livestock that don't immediately fit into the other categories I originally thought I'd classify these four legged animals as different kinds of dogs chu nky dog ​​milky dog ​​horny dog ​​but farm animal encompasses them a bit better I still keep those names although we also have a category that I call exotic that covers all the animals that you see in the influencers selections on instagram that make you say that I don't know if you should have that thing, this can range from monkeys to bats and hyenas that, According to this incredibly reliable website, you could technically have in New York due to a legal loophole, also millennials and Gen Z often live in small apartments without pets and don't. they are paid enough to maintain a decent standard of living for themselves let alone a pet, so they often turn to plants to feel the joy that comes from nurturing a living thing in our rapidly decaying ecosystem, so im extending pet status to plants that way you too can do this hp calculation because gosh we all need a distraction sometimes when building a set of pet types we can assign hp ranges to each of them by finding lowest base hp and highest max hp of each type the absolute extremes of this scale are shedinja with a base hp of one and lord of whales with a max hp of 544 now both would be pretty wild to keep as pets considering that one is the shell left after a cicada mulc and the other is a whale but that is why they are the extremes and that is why we are not done with our equation but we can still know er the full hp range of a dog, but what is your dog's hp range?
I thought for a moment about having size. be the following criteria because you might think that the bigger the animal, the more hp it would have, that's actually not true, in fact the pokemon with the highest base hp is blissey, this strange little woman egg and onyx, a huge snake of rock has one of the lowest. base hp of all pokemon this confused me so i had to go back to the original popularizer of hp dungeons and dragons and that's where i realized what really affects your hp value your value is not defined by size or shape of your body is about what you do with the body you are given has to do with class as what standard game class your pet falls into each class has different ranges of hp depending on what the barbarians are expected to do. frontline, so they tend to have a lot more hp than a rogue that sneaks out the back.
I've decided that the classes that make the most sense for pets are Barbarian, Ranger, Paladin, Cleric, and Rogue. I haven't included any classes like sorcerer because if you have a magical pet what are they? are you doing here go cast spells with your turtle these class distinctions separate your pet's hp range into 10 equal portions if your pet is a rogue you get the first six if your pet is a barbarian you are between five and ten the personality of your pet will determine what class they fall into your pet is a rogue if they are mischievous rakes and nimble cats tend to come to mind for the rogue category simply because they are always on top in the sense that they shouldn't be on top in your pet he's a cleric if they are kind reserved and healing a rabbit that jumps into your lap after a hard day's work and makes you forget all your worries lots of zucchini aka any number of zucchini he's a paladin your pet is a rangers if they are self reliant, aloof and do their own thing, ask yourself, am i holding my pet rat back from his true ambitions?
The answer is always yes and your rat is a ranger and ultimately your pet is a barbarian if they are rude, cheeky and brave to the extreme your dog digs under the fence so he can jump into your neighbor's pool your dog is marmaduke is too a barbarian your pet can have a combination of many of these traits, but it's up to you to decide which traits are most dominant now that we've designated your pet's type and class, we need to get into the nitty-gritty of their exact hp, what means to find the level of your pet to be able to do this, you have to observe your pet in a scientific way, so I contacted a field biologist.
Hi, I'm Olivia, I'm a wildlife biologist. If anyone knew how to calculate an animal's hit points, it would be someone who held a huge bird like a torch. Have you ever found the hit points of any of the animals you've been researching? I have never been involved in any. kind of a study where that was something we looked at so it's not cool but there are probably a lot of studies on hit points with anna probably even though she had no experience with my specific question she knew she would have some helpful advice to observe animals in their natural habitat when you are observing an animal how much interaction should you have with it none none at all none do you have to sit like a blind man or a tent of some kind where you are hidden or appear to be part of the environment you co Should use a Ghillie suit, people have also made how long are you watching that animal because it depends on how much time and resources you have.
Obviously, there have been scientists who have been watching the same hawk for 20 years straight. So if I'm trying to get a perfect understanding of my pet's hp, I should be watching it for several years. Looking for Olivia sent me an animal behavior data sheet that I could use as a template to observe and record a pet's behavior, but some of these behaviors wouldn't make sense when observing your pet on a random day, we ended up developing a new sheet that had standard behaviors and class-specific behaviors that had different weights associated with them you observe your pet for x number of hours you add up all the behaviors it did over the course of those hours and then divide the total ed weight by x to give it the level of its pet the logic behind this is that a higher level pet is more likely to have more intense and class specific behaviors then plug that level into this algorithm and get your pet's hp may seem like a challenge but the science doesn't it should be easy it should be right this is probably the hardest scientific job you've ever had to do really you is yes with these tips in mind i welcome you to my home to test these calculations i need proof subject so i am using my roommate's cat zuko he lives in my apartment but he doesn't pay rent and eats my bagels if I leave them unattended as I mentioned above finding their pet's hp can be a fun bonding exercise and in this case I've been dealing with this little bastard's antics for so long that I need to remind myself why he's here by quantifying his value.
The first step is easy. As I mentioned earlier, cats are often mischievous, but I don't think it would suit Zuko well considering he's the least stealthy of creatures. I know his meow sounds like he's been smoking two packs a day for the last 40 years and every time he manages to sneak into his food cabinet he dumps me. I know right away, I just wanted to see what's going on here in the cat closet where we keep all the cat food. ok, but now it's time to watch zuko to find his level as per olivia's instructions. I have to watch him for several years without any interaction after explaining why he needed it.
I'm sick and I took a sick day this is the hard part because it will require me to watch zuko go about his daily activities without him noticing I'm here I assumed my position and waited for the interesting behaviors to begin with it wasn't just terribly boring but i was starting to fear that zuko wasn't as strong as i expected please do something but then i realized there was an exploit in my system though olivia a scientist said you should keep your jamming for at least , I'm not a scientist, I'm a gamer, and I started what's known as power leveling.
I had to get as many experience points as I could for Zuko before my roommate came home and asked me what I was doing during the day that zuko averaged 63 behavior experience points per hour, even though those behaviors were somewhat coerced by me. , i know i broke my system by interacting with zuko but if it makes my pet happier and makes him less weak then why not? i played with the system i also noticed that zuko and i had grown closer our support level had risen to at least b i no longer saw him as a freeloader who sometimes vomits on my bed i saw him as a partner who sometimes vomits on my bed My bed when I felt lonely in my empty apartment, it was there for me when my stomach ached from the sushi in the bodega.
He purred just enough to ease my pain. this time i spent trying to calculate his hp, i hadn't realized he was replenishing mine, so here is zuko barbarian, level 63, i love him with all my heart and he loves me just the same, yes,ok ok beautiful remember when i said i really wanted to play cyberpunk rpg finally we did come watch me play as a totally obnoxious forum moderator named van gogh bango guys dont say other things we should just have one person in it you're making it look like there's more than one person there's only one person in the bathroom mud bango

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