5 Keys to Controlling Anger

Hello, I'm Dr. Christian Conte and in this video I will give you five

keys

on how to control your

anger

. I run a website called dr. Christian Conte calms, which has to do with emotional management because at the end of the day we all experience emotions and certainly we all at some point in our lives experience

anger

and for me anger management is something that we could all benefit from and the management Anger is much more than just dealing with anger, it's about the emotions surrounding anger. I've posted a few videos on YouTube before, but I've never done it consistently.

This video is the first in a series of videos I'm about to make. regularly, so if you want any of the information in this video, I will ask you to subscribe to this channel. If you have questions, put them in the comments section. I'll go through them and try to answer them every week in different videos, so let's look at these five

keys

to

controlling

your anger, okay, because let's face the facts, we all have anger and there are ways to deal with it more effectively when you think about the world. today you think about how many people are exploding with anger how many people are losing control and hurting other people it is unacceptable that all of us are challenged to have the discipline to manage our anger well so I want to give you that look I say we all have problems , if you are alive right now you have problems, but that's okay because I like it too, I look like a person who has never been angry, of course I have been angry, I don't know how to deal with it.

I still get angry, but the difference is knowing how to handle that anger well, so anger will surely arise for you, but follow these five keys and I tell you that you will handle it in a much more effective way, so here are the first key is this don't get attached now think about this our egos have us wanting to be right in every situation think about the last time you were in an argument with someone or in a disagreement you instead of being open to learning we would all say we all say hey look oh, I'm open to learning oh yes, now I have a lot more to learn in my life.

I can learn a lot more. Most people would say that, but when it comes to an argument or disagreement suddenly it's like hey, I'm not my egos, my egos, right? I'm defending myself to the end and we get very attached so I've talked about attachment this way before I talk about it like this let's say these are all my ideas and I put my ideas here and I hold on to my ideas if you don't agree with my ideas and I am attached to my ideas I get very angry and think wow, you dare, how dare you disagree? with who I am, but if I take my ideas and put them here and you disagree with my ideas, I can recognize that, hey, you're not disagreeing with the essence of who I am, you're just disagreeing with some of my ideas, so Not being attached helps us, it helps us in a more than significant way because I realize that it leads us to the second key of what I want to tell you, which is not taking things personally, look how many times you have allowed your anger to simply swell. and grow because you have taken things personally.

One fact, as I said at the beginning, is that we all have problems, we all have things going on in our lives and the problem occurs when we start taking other people's problems personally. A lot of times people will say well, what if I'm saying something directly? What if someone tells me directly? So I say it's about me, it's personal. I say no, it's not personal. Look in the comments section below this video. You'll see a lot of questions come up, there will be positive things that people will say, you know they'll say appreciative things, but there will definitely be people that will just lash out and say bad things.

I won't take it personally, it's not. about me, if you don't even know me, how can it be about me? It's about you, right? and when it comes to people saying bad things and lashing out at you, it's not about you, it's about them, and when you learn that, when you really understand that because I get the feeling that a lot of people understand that here, but understand it here It is very different, but when you can learn to not take things personally, it is one of the best gifts you can give yourself and that is why it is, for me, one of the five most practical keys to managing anger well, so The third key to managing anger well and

controlling

it is learning when to let things go, too often people find it very difficult to let things go.

And why is it so difficult for us? Why is so difficult? Because again I think it's about our egos. So we want things to go our way, so we say, "Well, I'm going to get through it," and when I do. Myself, this is what's going to happen and we stick to our vision and until we learn to stop needing things to be our way, then we fall apart when things don't go our way, so stop needing things to go our way. things are to go our way. way is a really important key to managing your anger well and you say well, I never get anything to go the way I want, things never go the way I want and that is important to understand so as not to use extreme language because too often we say never, you always know that can.

I can't stand it and those words increase the anger even more, so learning to let things go your way is huge. Letting go is a powerful and empowering step. The fourth key is to be aware of what is happening in your body. being aware of what is happening in your body, in other words, if I tell you how many times in your life you have yelled at someone when you were actually hungry, almost everyone watching will say, "Okay, it was me, I did it." ". If I tell you how many of you have been angry at someone else because you were actually too tired, I'm the same authority as the people watching this video, I'm going to plead.

I guess I can remember a time when I was arguing but actually I was just too tired if I tell you what if you think about it you are in a situation where you were stressed and you yelled at someone all these things happen to us hunger fatigue being stressed even something as simple as being too hot can agitate us and when we are not aware of what is happening in our body we start making up a story then we get hungry and now we start saying "I feel agitated" so why do I feel agitated? agitated, I must be upset about this. and then we make up some story and then we get really angry, whereas if we were well fed at that time we probably wouldn't have gotten so angry about the same thing, so it's very important to be aware of what's going on inside your body, the more aware you are , the more aware you are, then you can get to the fifth key and for me the fifth key is simple but it is simple to understand but it is very difficult to practice and that is learning to say what is really happening. stay with you listen to that learning to say what's really going on with you in other words if I'm hungry I can say instead of yelling at my wife I can say you know what honey I'm really hungry right now It's not a good time to have that conversation because I'm so hungry hunger that let me eat something here real quick and then we can sit down and talk about it or you know, I've written a lot about this on my website. website dr.

Christian Conte comm check it out. I've written a lot about this and there's an old adage that says never go to bed angry and I think that's nonsense and I think it's outdated because if the only reason you're arguing with your loved one is because you're both too tired or one of you is too tired then of course go to sleep go to bed angry when you wake up in the morning and are well rested chances are and listen if you want to keep fighting keep fighting but chances are you don't want to do it so be aware of what's going on in your body and then express it accurately and with so many people across the country I could go and speak across the country I can reach. interact with thousands of people and many people will say you know it sounds so simple but why is it so difficult?

And I think it's so difficult for most people because we've gotten into these behavioral patterns of just not learning to express what's going on. with us so once you start doing it and believe me, all the techniques I talk about are these five keys to anger management, as soon as you're done with this video, you can turn it off and then start practicing it and see what happens. In other words, if you're feeling a certain way, let's say you're feeling anxious instead of lashing out in anger, say that, try it, just try saying it, you know I'm really sorry, but I'm feeling really anxious right now. and I think it makes me feel a little agitated and a little angry.

I don't think it's about you, I think it's about me and then let me deal with that for a moment and see the more you learn to express that accurately. The more effective, the more effectively you will control your anger, these five keys to controlling your anger management, believe me, I'm telling you, these are really important things, so try them. I'm going to start posting videos more regularly, so any questions you have. I have to leave a question in the comments section. I appreciate you if you like this video. I really appreciate it if you like it and go ahead and subscribe to the channel, then you will get updates and know when there will be new videos. posted listen, we all have problems, we all have anger and that's okay, sometimes we need to be kind to ourselves as we learn what I taught you today or what I expressed today, whether it was a review for you or not, what I expressed today in This video maybe you have it here but we have to work to practice it here.

I wish you all much peace in learning more about me or the emotional management I teach. Visit Dr. Christian Conte calmly