Why some of us are addicts | Robert Lefever | TEDxWarwickSalon

Thank you for inviting me, it is a privilege to be here to share my ideas with yours. I know I may not look like an addict but I've been totally paid probably since I was born. I have an addictive nature. I do not use addictive substances or processes. Nowadays, not for 31 years, but I'm still an addict. I know that any day I start using any mood-altering substance or process and I don't know how to stop, I crave more, wait, wait, wait, more my In my family we don't deal with heart disease, or cancer , nor diabetes, we mainly dedicate ourselves to addictions, we are very good at that.

My mother's mother died of alcoholism. My father's father died of alcoholism. My mother had a little disorder. My wife's father committed suicide due to his addiction. My father died because of his my wife and I, when we got married and raised together, we did our part to keep this gene pool running. Our oldest son has addiction problems. He now runs rehab. He is very well trained for that. There are six people who have an addiction. nature the rest of the population not the non-

addicts

may be stupid and may do harmful things but those of us were

addicts

by nature and not by transients the young are born are not made behind cancer diabetes heart disease those of us who edit and use nicotine alcohol drugs sugar are the main troublemakers we bring down the health care and welfare systems, our families, our society at large, each addict of any kind is considered to significantly affect the lives of five other people and no amount of determination and stubbornness by ourselves or other people or the government can change our nature, therefore most of us, addicts and addicts, need a profoundly different perception about the nature of addiction and its treatment for the part Non-addictive population in their behavior, good luck having fun, but be careful, I've done it myself. lots of addictive tendencies my weight varies so much by 50 pounds up and down year after year I had three different sizes of colors because I never knew from one month to the next what shape and size I used to be I smoked 30 cigarettes a day when I was a junior doctor in Hart Ward and there were people around me dying of smoking-related illnesses.

I used to take jobs I didn't even want to do. I rarely saw my children through my compulsive help. obsessively doing too much for other people, patronizing them and belittling them in the process, and not doing enough to protect myself. I caused a lot of pain, self-righteous pain, I lost three months of income by turning a card in a game of poker, the wives didn't. It wasn't like that when my wife ended up in front of a divorce lawyer, I went straight to our GP and asked him what It happens to Meg and he said the problem was me and I told him it can't be, I haven't had an affair I pay the mortgage I raise the children I just didn't see my minor addictive nature Oh transmitted disease how do they want us I'm going to do to the Regarding I try to help the illness that I can't even see or even recognize.

I needed to take responsibility for myself. I didn't learn about neurotransmitter disease in college or medical school. Eventually I recognized it in other addicts and they recognized it in me. We are responsible for our behavior if not our genes and we learn how to do it. to be the people we want to be instead of the destructive idiots we were born to be, so I do a few simple things daily that allow me to put into remission my neurotransmitter disease that caused more than enough problems for the first 47 years of my life. life I don't want this to cause more as a family doctor for 45 years I was familiar with the functioning of the normal brain and

some

extraordinary at the same time for 23 years running my own rehabilitation I cared for a total of more than 5,000 hospitalized patients, addicts of a kind or another like me.

I still do that work today on an outpatient basis. I have received ideal training for the work I do. I like Harry Potter, he speaks Parseltongue. I speak addict, my neurotransmission idea or disease is in one of us the mood centers in our brain don't work very well there is a defect in the way one brain cell communicates with another if we put six mood units on this side of a pair of neurons only five make it to the other side maybe one didn't release properly or wasn't picked up properly or maybe it looked out in either direction the end result is we are left in a situation as to the state of mood, so we will look at four plus one for anything to lift the innate feeling of inner emptiness and discover that alcohol works, cocaine works, cannabis works, sugar works, nicotine works, rhubarb, right?

It has other effects so we don't bother with it or the bananas, they don't hit the mark, but my idea. It's just that we have to find a way to investigate this because you know without the investigation we're not going to get anywhere. Traditionally, research involves collecting hypothesis data, carefully longer observation, and usually concluding that more research is needed, so I think that's the most important thing is intuition and ideas. At my rehab we looked at this and I had a lot of questionnaires that specifically looked for 12 addictive characteristics in any behavior and we found that addictive outlets commonly go in groups like a hedonistic group: alcohol, recreational drugs, mood disturbance. prescription drugs, nicotine, caffeine, gambling and risks, sex and love addiction, and there is nursing parenting for oneself, food group that uses sugar and refined flour, binge eating, vomiting, hunger, purging, they are all the same, using food to change mood, and in this group, shopping, spending work and exercising, and then there is the compound relationship group, helping to use ourselves as drugs for other people and relationship addiction, using other people like drugs on Johnson sex, no thanks, would you mind getting laid?

Well, I have

some

that are extreme, but there are Many are relationship addicts in a business world who use their staff or clients as drugs for themselves. I think each of these groups is mediated by a gene because we found that some people had just one group, some people had - some people had all three. I have all three myself, as I say, I believe I am ideally suited for the work I do to help other people end their neurotransmitter disease. I understand these people instinctively. I see that neurotransmission disease has three causes: first, the antecedent cause, genetics, second, the contributory cause, trauma. and third, the precipitating cause, exposure to something that works to change the mood, the treatment has to be done in three phases in reverse order, first abstinence, there is no point in trying sensible use, we don't have the gift for it, second emotional therapy, whatever works. specifically on feelings rather than primarily on thoughts and thirdly control genetic inheritance a daily commitment to the 12 step program first formulated by Alcoholics Anonymous the most effective therapy for addicts is group therapy which helps addicts to help each other what happens as a complete disaster is when an addict of any kind is treated by someone who is not an addict, it doesn't work.

The annex needs people who understand them specifically because any idea can totally outwit any individual counselor, doctor, or psychiatrist, but it won't be able to outwit a whole. group of addicts have made the same excuses and told the same lies because individualized therapy is completely ineffective unless the counselor is also an addict and unless that counselor has had extensive experience in other therapies and knows all the games they play For addicts the most effective group therapy I know is psychodrama which works on thoughts, feelings and behaviors all at the same time and looks at the past, present and future so they can trust in the only form of individual therapy, in instead of staying stagnant.

What I value is EMDR eye movement desensitization and reprocessing this form of bilateral mirror stimulation helps the thinking brain talk to the feeling brain. I use sound touch and muscle movement in addition to ila, but I find it to be much more effective in helping people heal. Instead of accepting something, it's like treating appendicitis instead of diabetes. I am often asked to talk about really rich people or really poor people. I don't make neurotransmission disease an equal opportunity disease. What I want at the end of all this for myself and my patients is much more than mere abstinence and avoidance of problems.

I want three things. I want peace of mind despite the ants or problems. Happy and neutral relationships. I want spontaneity, creativity and enthusiasm when my wife meg. I died after 51 years of being together and three weeks after emerging from bankruptcy as a result of fraud, I did not return to my old addictive behavior and I did not use wood or take pharmaceutical drugs to make the lights go out. but there was no one at home. I wanted a lot more than anything, like eyelashes. I wanted to keep my neurotransmitter disease in remission, where it belonged. I have better things to do.

I have a life to live.