Steve Irwin Introduces Conan To A Crocodile | Late Night with Conan O’Brien

Alright, Steve, tell us what's going to happen first. Well buddy, we'll start with a couple of smaller animals and work our way up to some legendary animals. You really are Australian, aren't you? (Audience laughs) I don't know, man. I can't help it. I was born there. You guys really did it... Just say "Barbie shrimp" just once. Throw a shrimp on the Barbie. Thank you. Well. (Audience applauds) I mean, in Australia, we call them shrimp. Oh, all good. Well, let's get into this. Let's look at the first animal. We have to get going here. I want to see some animals.

Well. Hi Terry! First I have to introduce you to my wife. My wife, she's fine. Hello. Hi how are things? She is his wife. How are you? I'm glad to see you. Terry, is it Terry? That's me. Well. So I'm going to fight some bugs. You're going to get... My beautiful and brave wife. That's me. Yes. Does she always wear shorts wherever she wants to go? She wears them in winter. It's the most fun. Women like it, but... Interesting. Alright, let's do the first animal here. I'm curious to know what it is. Okay, let me do something.

Maybe they want to take a step back. (Audience laughs) Okay. What is this animal here? Let's put it on the desk so people can see what it's about. Well, this is a bearded dragon, Conan, and they are found all over Australia. And we've been doing some documentaries with Animal Planet. And we're at the Dingo Fence, which is this fence that divides Australia and keeps the dingoes off the sheep land. Is there a fence that runs through all of Australia? Dude, it's the longest fence in the world. And we do this documentary monitoring. And then, this little bearded dragon runs through the Simpson Desert.

And let's face it this way. And what they do is they puff out their necks, and that's a sign of aggression, you know, stay away from me. OK, it's OK. And I came down and I was talking to this little lizard. And he looked at me like that and bit my nose. Oh really? Yes. Can you get them to do that now? I would love to see that. (Audience laughs) Try it. (laughter and applause) Come on, bring in Eisenhower. (makes mocking noises) Watch out, Eisenhower. Well. They are not cute? He's afraid of Eisenhower. He says, "That guy beat Hitler.

I'm not going to pick a fight with him." Okay, what else do you have? We have to move. Yes. You bet. We need animals here. Exchange you. Will that thing bite? Yes, they will bite, yes. Take a look at this little beauty. Isn't she cute? I'll approach it this way because they actually urinate like projectiles and... (audience laughs) We've had several guests do that. (laughs) You'd be surprised how many. And this is a snake-necked turtle from Australia. They are found in fresh water and... And they shoot their urine? As far as it goes? Oh, from here to your tie, I guess. (Audience laughs) Interesting.

And also a large amount. A lot of urine? A lot of urine. Could you point that thing in that direction, please? What about when they are older? (laughing) I'm not going to get into that. When they grow up, it doesn't go that far, that's fine. Can they write their name in the snow? (Audience laughs) And the reason I have this little bastard on the show is because I do scientific research and we're in this

crocodile

-infested river. And I dove in and caught this turtle. I had never seen this turtle before. I grabbed it and it was an undescribed species.

Now I have a turtle named after me. It's called... This turtle? Well, what is that? What turtle? Elseya

irwin

i. Because your name is Irwin. Yeah, so they, you know, the old Latin name

irwin

i. Well. Very cool. Yes. Cute, right? Yes. I like this ending better. (laughing) Okay. Let's see another one. Let's put it this way. Okay, I got it. What else do we have? We have to get to the

crocodile

at the end and release it into the crowd. (Audience laughs) Here you have the entire chain. Well. Now we are talking about real animals. Alright. Alright. (audience exclaims and ahhs) My agent showed up.

Well well. Isn't my wife a legend? Yes. My wife is a legend. That is incredible. Alright, that's great. That is incredible. This is a Burmese python. Well. Hello. Which has been a star in one of our shows. Well well. Why is she coming here? What's the point of that? Well, yeah, she's a woman and she's probably attracted to you, Conan, you know, like... Great, I always get the snake. (laughs) Okay, it's wrapping around my ribcage. Yeah, well these... Oh God! (laughs) Oh God! Oh God! (Audience applauds) These are pythons and they can be stripped naked (audience applause drowns out the speech). (laughs) The thing about Python is that I owe this Python 50 dollars. (laughter and applause) Is it starting to harden?

Yes. Well, we have to... Wait, buddy. Yes, I have this one. Don't worry. (audience laughs) I'll leave it there. Terry and I are going to get this done. Alright. Well, we're out of time. We have to show the crocodile. Go find the crocodile and let's watch them fight or something. You might want to be careful with your legs, buddy. Crocodile coming out this way. Should I get wrapped up in a snake when a live crocodile comes out? Isn't that really silly? Wouldn't the snake panic and... You know, I'll be available for a reservation next week. Well.

Brilliant. (Audience laughs lightly) Guys, you forgot... You forgot to take this. Oh ah. Oh Lord. What if the snake panics and... Wait, wait, wait. You're okay, honey. Are you OK. (audience chatter) This girl is a little grumpy. Do you know that she? You have surprisingly little control over that animal. Yes. (laughs) Actually, this animal has the ability to- You're an idiot! (laughing) Thank you, thank you. I can't help it. Take a look at that to see the tooth structure. It has the ability to destroy your legs, Conan. Yes Yes. Well, I think you're in the worst situation right now.

Although she is very cute. Look, she has big Bette Davis eyes and a nice butt. And she's hissing. That is a sign of aggression. That's like, "Don't play with me." Okay, good, good. And you're the one who irritates him on national television. Absolutely. Okay, well... Isn't she cute? She is so beautiful. We're going to have to take a break right now. And then in the commercial, we'll see them try to get that thing out of here without getting killed (laughs), which I think will be a lot of fun. Very good, Steve Irwin. Thank you very much for being with us.

Give everyone a hand. We will go to rest. Thank you. (The audience applauds)