Give Your Inner Child Permission to Heal | Kristin Folts | TEDxOcala

September 11, 2001, where did you

give

your

self

permission

to go back to that day and feel

your

emotions, your shock, your anger, your sadness? I remember that day vividly. I was nervous about my first humanities exam of the new semester as I jumped out of my fire truck. Camaro in a red t-shirt thinking it was cool It would be 20 short minutes from that moment that my world would change forever when strangers stole the security I felt and in my memory there is a clear line between before 9/11 and After 9/11. September, sometimes our minds miss the details of our lives, while other moments in our lives are as if they happened yesterday.

This is what trauma in its rawest form does, whether you are 5, 15, 25 or 75, it influences how we see life and create. Visible and invisible emotional wounds of equivocal proportions, fast forward almost 20 years and my life's work has revolved around helping

child

ren and families

heal

from their traumas. My heart is working with foster parents who love

child

ren with complex trauma. Hello, my name is Kristin Foltz and I am your

inner

child

heal

ing guide and right now I am giving you

permission

to begin your healing journey to wholeness. We must first put on our

inner

child's trauma glasses, looking at trauma from a different lens, it creates space to heal our own childhood pain points and helps us show compassion towards others who may be using their traumas as a Badge of Unspoken courage.

I find that when I view trauma as an unspoken or unmet need for healing, it brings empathy and understanding to the emotions, feelings, and behaviors due to the present and unconscious wounds of the inner child. These wounds can be major or minor experiences in your life that I like to call big T traumas and small T traumas. They can be multi-layered and even multi-generational due to the wounds of your inner child that block part of your life. Authentic self that you want to protect, although this is for good reason, it is more beneficial for you to

give

yourself permission to heal.

The sad truth of the matter is that whether you remember your traumatic events, your body and mind remember, your subconscious mind remembers. I must say and keep track of every moment of fear, abandonment, rejection, shame and helplessness you have experienced. Trauma knows no race or religion, it is not selective or predestined to occur, and no one is exempt from possibly being on the receiving end of a traumatic event. So what does the person with trauma look like? It could be anyone you know. Is he a veteran fresh off the battlefield? Is it the professional who doesn't remember that fateful night?

The names and faces are blurred, but the nightmares and counseling sessions remind them that something happened, but there is not much hope for closure or justice, or are the countless immigrant children who have been separated from their Parents looking for a better life here in the United States? third grade class of a boy who clings to the hope that he will be reunited with his parents and her siblings. I knew this kid and he would hang in there every day and ask me if I can go home today. I really miss my little one. red racing car, last but not least, are children shocked in the classroom at the supermarket by anonymous strangers by a nosy neighbor or are you at a community event where everyone becomes a victim when another human being decides to end them? your life in the name of religion now that we have a definite hypothetical idea of ​​what a person with trauma can be like, let's talk about what your inner child tells you as an adult here you are in your thirties or forties and your inner child becomes emotionally activated now you are a scared and broken version of your seven year old self a long time ago you were up to this point living life with your two kids and a half white picket fence money in the bank you're in a job that stresses you out but you stay because it pays the bills and your child interior knocks on your door on a dark and stormy night, what do you do?

You turn off the house, close the blinds, and hope your inner child thinks you're not home, or you acknowledge it and give yourself permission. to review your weak points from your childhood so that you can move on and be a new and improved version of your adult self just for fun, let's invite your inner child for a cup of tea, this allows you to recognize your experiences, gives you permission. Receiving guidance opens you up to healing your secret pain points and allows you to grow as you walk your healing journey. By doing this you are guiding your inner child to heal and create space to declare and have a mindset and free yourself from a me too mentality I am an overcomer I am resilient I am a voice and my story matters and the next step of your journey of healing there are five things I want you to say to your inner child when you knock on your own door one I I give you permission to heal - I give you permission to forgive yourself and others three I honor our journey together four I love you five thank you wow, Isn't it so powerful to give ourselves permission to heal?

Every person in this room has a story of triumph and tragedy. They have scars and what ifs, desires and dreams. I would be setting you up for possible failure if I didn't tell you that the healing journey is not always one of glitz and glamour, sometimes it is the ugly crying that turns angry, the kind of healing experience that requires walking towards wholeness. The other day I was reminded of a profound insight into healing that I would like to share when I was 32 weeks pregnant, a close relative of mine gave birth to a beautiful stillborn baby boy and she was 29 weeks there.

There was no medical reason for this to happen and my family was devastated that same day. I was diagnosed with late gestational diabetes and my doctors were worried about my own son. My dreams of a peaceful home birth with my favorite midwife were shattered. My courage was shattered. I was tattered and broken and mourning my family hundreds of miles away as I felt my daughter move inside me. I was transported to a moment in time where I was once again scared and helpless and I was only four years old and locked away. I have been a part of these emotions and feelings for many years and I had two options: Option A was to keep my emotions and feelings in a corner of my soul and pretend that everything was okay.

Option B was to make a conscious decision to process what had happened. A long time ago, I'm happy to say, I chose healing that day. A few weeks later, I had a heart-to-heart conversation with my grieving relative and she had something very profound to tell me. Kristin said, you have to go through the pain, not around it, no. Above or below you have to walk through it and on the other side wait patiently and lovingly for as long as it takes for healing and wholeness, otherwise it will keep knocking on your door, so today is the time to give yourself permission. to heal your childhood pain points honor your memories and emotions and then release them so that you too can walk your healing journey toward wholeness.

Thank you.