20 Minutes for the NEXT 20 Years of Your LIFE | Oprah Winfrey

Practicing gratitude is my most important

life

practice, I must say, and I know that with the arrival of Thanksgiving many people think about being grateful, there is a lot to talk about thanksgiving and blessings, but that is how to go to church at Christmas and Easter. It counts but it's not consistent because for me gratitude is necessary and should be practiced every day because making space to appreciate what you have opens you up to a happier, more fulfilling existence, I guarantee it, while ensuring those blessings continue to flow. . The truth is that it is a law what you focus on in

your

life

, so focusing on what you are grateful for increases positive vibes and feelings of joy, only one good feeling is based on another good feeling and another, and if you actively appreciate everything you have in life. no matter how small what you notice is that you end up having more and when you focus on what you don't have you never have enough so being grateful for what I have learned allows us to fill the cracks and crevices between what we want and what we already have. we have with positivity so that we can pave the way for grace to appear and lead us to an even better life.

So how can you make gratitude a habit for me? The first thing I do in the morning is read some type of spiritual enlightenment that allows me to start the day with a positive state of mind that will only help generate even more positive energy and for me that is the daily word that is Christian based or the book of psalms, also the book of awakening by christian mark nepo. It's just spiritual, no religion, with a daily meditation and rumi or mary oliver, there's something called a sake bowl which I love too, it's spiritual sufi teachings that you can download for free in

your

inbox, but the best thing I've ever done is have a gratitude journal, so I started one over 20

years

ago and every day for

years

I write down five things I'm grateful for.

I think you should write them down because there is power, power, power in the written word and it can be anything big. or small, some days those things will be easy, you know, chatting with a close friend or taking a walk in Chris Fall's air, having a loved one cook you dinner or bring you a cup of tea, some days it can be hard to even think. of anything and that is completely normal and when things don't come to mind it easily comes back to your breath because if you breathe in you should be grateful, know that you have that and just open your eyes in the morning and have that breath is a gift, but every day I constantly write down five things I'm grateful for, sometimes it's more than five, but if I can't get to five, I just breathe, breathe, gratitude is a posture of your heart, a choice and a privilege, so I hope you make the decision to start a daily gratitude practice if you haven't already.

I've been saying it for years because I know it for a fact. Appreciating noticing the pleasures that appear in your life will ensure that there is more goodness. Coming here later like no one has ever experienced. I think the best thing we can do collectively is take care of our individual cells. Now I know that may seem oversimplified and even selfish to some people, but this is what I know for sure. You have to feed yourself with love and loving thoughts to show yourself more fortified and complete to give other people your love. We hear a lot about self-care these days, but what does it really mean to me?

It's about engaging in practices that fulfill you in every way—that means eating foods that are enjoyable and nutritious, giving your body the gift of some form of movement every day, and surrounding yourself with people whose energy lifts you up. This is so important, also create space in your day or at least just give yourself at least a minimum of five

minutes

of stillness, that alone time is so crucial when you can distance yourself from the voices of the world so that you can hear your own voice loud and clear, that's why I've dedicated Sundays as my time for recalibration. and renewal, so sometimes it's just a simple walk in nature or just sitting in the backyard, all that alone time helps me refocus and recharge for whatever the

next

week is and however shows up, that's what you should do.

For you, I love how Glennon Doyle put it in her book Love Warrior, she said I met me and I'm going to care for her fiercely, so I know that as women we have to remind ourselves to continually be a priority because when you truly value yourself, the world reflects that value for you, no one needs to be reminded of the importance of self-care, although more than moms, so we all know that in normal times, before there was a pandemic, moms had a lot on their plates managing the needs of children, spouses, households and in-laws and that is why I have so much respect for people who do it well and now the pandemic has taken its toll juggling increased child care demands with the ramifications of mental health and the economic strain of more than you know that five million women's jobs have been lost since February 2020.

So we know that mothers carry a heavy burden on their shoulders and that is just another indication that focusing on yourself It is so important. Is there someone you should forgive? It is one of the most difficult principles of life to practice, but it can also be one of the most rewarding. It is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself. You forgive and free yourself from the heavy burden of resentment that you have been carrying and that is weighing you down. When you go down, you become lighter, literally, and things in your life start to fall into place.

As someone who has experienced abuse as a child, I know very well that the struggle to forgive the people in your life who have hurt you is real and it is painful, but know. This isn't about forgiving whatever that person did to mistreat you, it's about allowing what they did to affect the way you live your life now. Dr. Joel Jampolsky told me this way years ago on the Oprah show. It's a great moment, aha, aha. that I have now accepted as a spiritual law when he said that forgiveness is giving up the hope that the past could have been different, I repeat that forgiveness is giving up the hope that what could have happened to a quarter, in reality not It was like this. to happen is to accept the reality of what happened and moving forward with this truth has been instrumental in allowing me to live my best life, it was transformative, you have to come to realize that what could have been is not easy to hear, I know that and It's harder to do, you have to sit with the pain, feel it, it's uncomfortable, but when you can get up and face that pain face to face and then let it flow through you, only then can you let it go and get out of the pain of your history towards the possibility of the present I have carried this lesson from iyanla vanzant with me for some time.

I remember years ago on the show she said that you can accept or reject the way other people treat you, but until you heal the wounds from your past you will continue to bleed you can bandage the bleeding with food with alcohol with drugs with work with cigarettes with sex she said but eventually it will leak out and stain your life you must find the strength to open the wounds put your hands inside pull out the core of the pain that holds you in your past, the memories and make peace with them so here is the formula, Accept what happened, forgive others, forgive yourself, accept the now, that is the recipe to begin to heal and give up the hope that the past could have been anything different than what it really was, whatever. thing that happened helped make you you.

My hope is that you find the courage to give up all your grudges because what I do know for sure is that on the other side of forgiveness is freedom. live the life you were destined for and the one you truly deserve. There are so many feelings we've all experienced over the last year and a half as a collective, so we're all in this together. I know we've heard it. A lot of people didn't believe that before, but we're in this together feeling the same things whether we agree on what we feel or not, and one of the abiding feelings I know is the feeling of uncertainty without knowing for sure. what's

next

, so our lives have been shaken and changed, to say the least, leaving many of us unsure of what's on the horizon, when we'll get back to the office full time, what's next to require that, how long will we be wearing masks, how long will we be fighting over masks, when will all this end?

And it really is completely natural to not have all the answers, so one thing I do know for sure is that we all have to let go. knowing that we have complete control and being able to prepare ourselves to navigate the waves of change as they come, but how do we do it? That anxiety arises when we live in the unpredictable nuances of the future. All the what ifs, you know, I remember when I was in In the 1998 trial, we looked down on a hamburger and had to sit in a courtroom for six weeks in yellow.

Thank you very much and at the beginning of that trial I was very anxious to learn to focus only on that day and not on multiple ones. The days ahead are what really kept me sane, so I think we all need to practice becoming more comfortable taking a step into the unknown and when those uncertain and overwhelmed feelings take over, you need to make an effort to stay in the moment. present and just be still, breathe and say. For you, I am here now and now everything is okay, everything is okay, I will be okay and there is nothing I can't handle, so take some time to be calm enough to listen to your inner GPS, your truest self and let than the cry of the world. dissipate, listen to the whispers as I like to say and then let that guide you.

Sometimes just the fear of uncertainty can stop us from taking the next step toward a breakthrough, but we can't allow uncertainty to simply fester and transform and then turn into doubt. Doubt that your strength. your determination that your values ​​will not support you as you navigate what comes next, they have been there for you in the past, they are there for you now and they will be by your side as time goes by, so look where you come from what You've traveled so far to get to who you are now and you're still adapting by evolving into a better and better version of yourself, hopefully, that's what we're all trying to do who you are and what you believe in can stay strong. and rooted enough to face uncertainty.

There is so much going on in the world right now. Mass mandates are changing across the country as vaccination rates increase. Travel is coming back. You may return to work in the office. It will be for the foreseeable future for many of you and as we look to the next chapter after such a long and challenging period, I think it is time for us all to think about refreshing ourselves in a way that allows us to keep the most important thing in order. what we are ready to let go and make room for the new in our world in our lives, so I don't know about you, but all these months away from the hustle and bustle of the world have changed me forever and I will.

I will always choose more carefully what should catch my attention and what should not, because I have learned many things that should not. When we press that little refresh button on our computers or phones, it updates everything so quickly and just that simple sometimes. It is even automated so you don't even have to think about it, thinking about it is an upgrade, although in real life as we know it takes effort, it takes time and patience, so be kind to yourself during these days, sign up and stay still until you can hear and feel the answers. you need to move forward and always feel blessed to have survived a pandemic and have another chance to do things right in our daily lives and I would say the best way to start discovering who you really are meant to be is to ask the god of the universe, that question God, how can I be used to serve myself first and how can I then use that service to serve the world?

Use your life to serve the world and you will discover that it also serves you. One of people's biggest mistakes. to do is think that they have to pay them a lot of money or even get paid for their call. You are here to honor your calling, whether you get paid or not, if you can get paid for it, that makes life exponentially better. But if you don't get paid for it, that's okay too because honoring the calling fuels everything else you do in your life, letting go of the energy that clouds your vision and holds you back.

It is a life practice that I learned a long time ago and that has freed me. For me, it is a fact that holding a grudge against someone who has wronged you or reliving painful situations in your head over and over again only weighs you down and prevents you from being who you are meant to be right now because you are still forcefully clinging to the past energy that you constantly rewind to resentment why they did that why they said that I didn't deserve to be treated that way all of that just keeps you goingstagnant will never change What happened?

You have to press stop and reject the temptation to keep playing so you can then fast forward to now. You know a lot of people think that holding on to things that took away their power will somehow magically change things. I said in my message a couple of weeks ago about forgiveness, you have to release the notion, give up the hope that the past could have been different and you also have to release the idea that people would do what you could do in any case. given. A big one that I had to learn and relearn before I understood it, expecting people to do what you would do in a situation only leads to your disappointment, not theirs, they move on with their lives so let people be who they are and you accept.

Whether you do it or you don't, not doing it keeps you stuck in a circumstance that actually costs you time, your energy, and I can guarantee that many times the person on the other side of the bitterness you're holding on to isn't even thinking about you, in fact. , he's probably just moved on, he's certainly not obsessed with the way you think. This is like letting go of any bad habit that simply does not serve your well-being, it is not an easy task, taking the path towards a more enlightened and healthy existence never is, so this is what I want to ask you to ask yourself why I'm holding on.

Let's get to this, what good is this for me? Really think about the answer, maybe it makes you feel validated, maybe it makes you feel fair or maybe taking on the pain is your way of acknowledging the injustice so that even if it isn't corrected, at least it can't be forgotten, so you will. I ask again, ask yourself if you want to be right or do you want peace. This was huge for me. The unfortunate fact is that having both may not be possible and you may also never have your moment of peace. Justice, so why wait?

Choose peace. What I know for sure is that in this world time is a movement and it is our most valuable asset. You can never get it back, so stay in that loop, play it over and over in your painful head. just amplify your pain let it go exhale make room in your heart for something that lifts you surround yourself with people who want the best for you you have the ability to change the dna of your spirit and control how you perceive life so why not lighten your charge up and let it go knowing that when you know better you do better we are ready to move on to what I believe is another powerful lesson that I began to learn when I was a very young girl, having been raised by my grandmother and then at six years old. years when I was separated from my grandmother, moved to Milwaukee and suddenly found myself in a strange environment for me.

I remember entering that new space and recognizing that in many ways I was alone, which is a terrible feeling when you're six years old, but I always had the deep understanding that if anything was going to move forward in my life, I would have to be responsible for it. make that happen and I know that to be true now and I can articulate it since you are responsible for your life. and if you are sitting around waiting for someone to save you, fix you and even help you, you are wasting your time because only you have the power to take responsibility for moving your life forward and the sooner you get it, the sooner your life will get. going on this is what I know from having done 25 years and thousands and thousands of interviews on the Oprah show no matter where you come from I have seen people come out of the desert walk through the desert born in the most dire circumstances no No matter what your mom did, whether she had a PhD or not, what matters now is this moment and your willingness to see this moment for what it is, accept it, forgive the past, take responsibility and move on.