Bill Burr Replies to Fans Online | Actually Me | GQ

that's what I see on social media like it's just I'm chasing the same people to try to act like you're still on Instagram it's like you were on Instagram you had a man bun you listened to emo you skated can you Just keep going back of course you had a hula hoop Hey what's up? GQ. I'm Bill Burr and I'm going incognito on the Internet. Uh oh, is it really me? Don't you like that it's

actually

me? Sounds like the end of one of the shows. your wife is watching, well here we go, can someone help me identify what type of Adidas sneakers Bill Burr is wearing?

Good question, those are like the bo boots, the Kem Abdul Jabar, which are like a long time ago, somewhere around the first Shack shoe that looked like. like an eye exam or some kind of weather forecast. I was like, "I don't understand what sneakers are anymore, you know what I mean, and then a few years later the first Kobe came out that was all checkered and looked like uh like." the robot feet, you know, I think it was supposed to be like RoboCop, so I've always liked the old ones, the Dr. J ones, the Kareem ones, you know, Jesus Christ, look at this, what do you think would make me so angry?

Bill like to cut him? out of his ear like Van Go, first of all, that painting is amazing and I'm not just saying that because it's me, maybe it's because I

actually

look, uh, I look pretty wild in that, like whoever did this, You're incredibly talented, maybe I'll have to do it. steal that look, what would you make me angry enough to cut off my ear? Nothing, I mean, I'm a but I'm not that crazy, what's the preemptive defense? It's not American after googling it, I still don't get it hey after looking. for almost 40 years I don't understand it, can someone explain it to me?

Like I'm five years old, preventive defense is fine on paper, you're winning the game, there's a little bit of time left, so instead of standing up and covering your receivers, the receiver is the person you throw the ball to. ball, what they do is give them a big cushion and supposedly protect the sidelines, if you go out of bounds the clock stops, so basically you just give them a 20 yard cushion. I can't do metrics, I don't know what's supposed to happen: you tackle them and before they go down the field and score, time runs out, that never happens, what happens is they just complete 20 yards and get out of limits and then every quarterback in the league suddenly looks like Joe Montana, okay, Star Wars, Star Wars, man, no one says Wicked, awesome, they can't, you can buy them.

I don't think you can, I have no idea, but yes, can I know that I don't make money now? Quora Quora sounds like some kind of chant you do in a yoga class you shouldn't have gone to. Bill is a psychopath. Well, I mean, if I were, I can't. Answer that you would have to analyze me, what would you estimate of Bill Bur's IQ? I would take the next question why Bill Burr is known as a comedian's comedian. You know why because I do my sentence, I don't burn the light. Why else am I supposed to do 15 minutes?

I do 15 minutes if I go in. I'm not going to walk in and turn on the light and lean on the microphone stand and say yeah, what else is going on and just stand there? I'm a good guy try to be you know people would debate that but you know what the life of a Boston sports fan is like um um it's amazing it's always been amazing winning or losing it's always been amazing because it's bigger than religion in Massachusetts people watch every game like when I lived there, you know, and had someone to talk to, like when the Bruins had a season, you just watched every game and then the Celtics were always great, the Patriots were fun, the Patriots were hilarious.

It was like we weren't even in the league, you know, we had this little one on the side of our helmet, we were playing in what looked like a high school football stadium, none of it made sense, we were always getting close and then I screwed it up and then a guy named Bob Craft bought the team and made three of the best coaching hires in a row, Bill Parcels, Pete Carol and then Bill Bich, which is crazy, so I have complete faith in whatever he hired. Me, suddenly, it's a sports program. That's when the next Bill Bur special comes out.

Are there enough? There are enough stand-up specials. Jesus Christ, they release one a week. That's classic. For me. This person is like a fan. They want to know when. my next job and I take it like you know, come on, come on, that's how I heard it. I'm learning when my next special is coming out. I don't know, but I'm filming it this year and I'm not going. to lie to you I'm having some of the best shows on My Career Instagram it's me I don't have enough money for a double voucher how come John Litz looks exactly the same as he did in 1993?

Oh that's because his dad is a Basset Hound, he comes from a long line of sad people and he's funny from a distance but if you get too close to him the sadness washes over you, he's a horrible human being, no actually He's one of my favorite people in this business, it's not a good photo of him, but don't say he looks bad. He did all that, didn't he? Sorry, John, they're saying you haven't aged. Oh, okay, Dr. Phil, live, Adam Ray, incredibly talented comedian. Okay, is this really Dr. Phil? I think he captures the essence of it.

Dr. Phil, you know, has to act a little more humble on his actual show. Which I liked the way Adam Ray does it. You have more of Dr. Phil in the house, where maybe you know that every two hours he. reminds his wife how much money he's making and how well she's being taken care of, so whatever he's doing that she doesn't like, she might want to think about bringing it up next time, what's this ? How much football do you watch? a week, oh yeah, yeah, that was before I had kids. He still had some hair.

He used to watch, you know, a 1:00 game, a 4:00 game and then a late game and then he'd be with the pack. I was recording other games and then you already had a Monday night game, you had a Thursday night game, so I would have a Tuesday game, a Wednesday game and a Friday game to watch during the week that I had recorded and then on Saturday I would see the university. football now I have kids and I don't know, I'm always watching Bluey, which is strange, you know very well what we are doing here. Misty is watching me watching a cartoon, okay, Twitter.

I love that we're still calling Twitter okay and that laminate is going to have to deal with it. I like the letter X, can you give it a? I know he was added to the show ironically, but someone give Bill Burren an Oscar for that performance in The Mandalorian Chapter 15. Well, first. everything is television so you can't win an Oscar it's an Emmy we wanted you to say that so much you know something what I mean so bad someone always says every time I do something stupid they say oh your friend my friend who died they say oh he would be wallowing in his grave right now and I always want to be like he was cremated, who brings up someone's dead friend, thanks for watching Star Wars, okay, let me read this here.

Donald Trump entered. a 20,000 capacity stadium and 19,999 people were very happy and then there was Bill Burr's wife, yeah, and I love how people like oh how can you do that? He's nice, he's racist, he likes to plagiarize some things from Hitler from time to time. while what is surprising is that a black woman doesn't like it. I don't like the guy my wife points the finger at. That's what I love about my wife. You know where you stand with her and you can't say that about a lot of people when I say something in the house, if she laughs, I know it's funny and I also know that if it bothers her, I tell her I'm going to put that in. my act and she says, don't put that. your act I go, I'm absolutely if you say don't act, it goes in the act, okay, let's go to YouTube and see what the animals said.

I would pay money to see Bill at a parent-teacher conference or school function. not at all buddy I don't act like I do on stage although I had an incident we're with friends now Wikipedia The Poor Man's Encyclopedia August 21, 2022 Burr became the first comedian to perform at Fenway Park in front of A sold-out crowd of around 35,000, it was also the largest comedy show in Boston history. Well I didn't count everyone, yeah it was amazing and then once I got out they liked it so they noticed the sound and The big screens were like this giant Comedy Club that everyone always goes to just make sure to take it in, you can't take it in when you're doing stand-up, it's like telling a joke, bam, and then they're waiting for the next one. one, so I can't, you know, you know, when Taylor Swift just draws her audience, yeah, you can't do that in stand-up, but she first performed stand-up comedy at the age of 23 on the 2 March 19992, that's true, there was a Find the Funniest College Student Contest in Boston at the Nicks Comedy Stop, which is still there.

All I remember about the first night is that I walked on stage and forgot everything I was going to say, but I remember going to grab the microphone and it felt like an outside body. experience and at that moment I knew I finally found what I wanted to do. 23 doesn't sound old to me now, but 23 shaking when you're 23 you feel a little behind and had tried construction. Landscaping, storage sales. I tried all of this. I was working in a dental office with my father at the time. But none of that was that I should get my license to sell health insurance.

That's how far I was going down the wrong path if I may tell you. Do you know any advice? Because many people have traumatic childhoods. One of the hardest things to learn in life is to listen to the voice inside you because everyone else has been yelling at you and you don't say what you're thinking. so that and that will really take you away from what you want in life, you must really like listening, but he's a licensed helicopter pilot and he likes to play the drums. I love playing drums and I love flying helicopters. I absolutely love them and got involved in them.

Because of conspiracy theory, everyone thinks conspiracy theory is bad. I was reading about the dollar and how there was nothing behind it and I was thinking, what if it collapsed? How to get out of La? You can't even get out of it. when everyone thinks there will be food tomorrow and it just made sense to go up and down helicopter Tik Tok I I I'm not on Tik Tok I drew on Instagram I like that is, can we get you to read books in schools and teach kids something real? life lessons and telling the hard truth about life haha, they need it.

I've done this. Did I really read books? No, it was like Jimmy Hendrick Day or something like that Black History Month, so they were doing something for Jimmi Hendricks, which is really stupid. what you're only going to appreciate Jimmi Hendricks in February is that he's no good in April let's move on here there's no way you're going to lose when you're chasing a dream no you don't because it takes you to a better place and the lessons you learn sometimes , when you go after a dream, you find out that that's not even what you wanted, that's not going to be this phantom itch that you can never scratch because you tried and you're like, hey, you know?

What this is not for me, your dream also changes. I started in '92 and I was a comedian and I was famous. What that was in 1992, before you knew the Internet and cell phones and all that stuff, went from being something that seemed cool and that I liked. maybe you don't know it became like truffle oil, remember it was like a big deal, they just put that in and it was all like it was too much. Prosperity is never guaranteed, so why not fail at what you love instead of failing? on something you don't care about, okay, I don't understand why they had to jump on what I said, that's like something as big as Instagram, like someone is doing something and all of a sudden your head is sitting there and like like this person is playing an amazing guitar solo.

I can't enjoy it unless I see what your reaction is. That's a major red flag for a narcissist, which is something you need to learn to recognize. Okay, that's all. I am disconnecting the Internet and closing the laptop. Thank you all for taking the time to write. I had a good time. I hope you do too.