TOP 10 Funniest Comedians EVER on Britain's Got Talent | Got Talent

With Fairy Tale of Love. Thanks This is a story about love when a boy and a girl in a bar. He sees a girl. I mean that's a big greeting. The dress looked lovely that night. She was wearing. He wasn't looking at him. Then he showed her the best dance of hers. Hey, you want to drink what

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you want, okay? Because? fair enough. The girl looks at the boy crying. I'm sorry. I've gotten a little taller. Don't go he says please don't go I love it The girl comes back. Sorry, let's go back to my coffee.

The boy says, "Hey, God." The boy got the girl and now they would be together for 45 years. It's a fairy tale. Thank you Dear 25 8:48 a.m. And the new famous maid arrived in her older brother's car. Did anyone mention the car? Yeah? Oh? Hi Simon, or can I call you dad? in 49, the housemates are having donuts for breakfast, and it's Emily Nature donut oh No news, is there anything they can't do mmm, Marge? You're talking about friend giver the Harpy She'll be back after Arthur Bridge the night she said Nothing's harder to do so pay attention 949 Am Trying to figure out if you've got the x factor You left like a pop star.

He sounds like a pop star. cut your food but Gara Gara Jar Jar Jar jar oh Garth Garth We need to find ice the thought once final judge Simon Hey Okay, let me stop you there Like you Thank you very much. Yes, be careful, you will lose your voice. Oh, I have a loyal car. After the heat, we got the wild card. What's the boy's deal? You make me talk. I did the best to you, I'm a look with that girl on the right ear, China, the little ticket once again sticking

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ything, move away, no, I took it from you, no, God, a little strange.

No, now the hypnotist puts people to sleep. Okay, so you're missing this week's Manda? Yeah? I didn't think I'd see you again. You know she didn't call me this week. Impressive, and I've been calling you doughy. Hey, that's because we're in , and you're in high definition. notices on a hot dolly who? Okay, let me out, not Mandarin Simon. not you. I thought she sent you home. Finish my number and you will see that you are a sensation among ladies all over the world. Yes I am. Just tell me. Can you let me share in your little one?

Secret where I speak this, can you really speak Spanish? Do you know how I'm going to do it then? I'm going to count to ten in English and then you translate well. Let's see what you've got One Luenell: 3 hope this isn't going to work? Why don't you go count to 10? Yeah, how do I know when you get to 6? Is it going to hurt? , Amanda Amanda. Shut up, Luis. That's not Louie. It seems that in no time Amanda, are you all ready? It's okay, it's okay. Hello, Sunita. Oh listen to me yes, you two always together masters.

We go great together We go together Saga, we stayed together forever, sorry, moody, I love television. Man. Does anyone here remember the blind date, ladies and gentlemen? Today you are flying, and here is your host, Miss Bella Black. We have three bonnie boys behind that screen, family applauding. How are you? And the beautiful girl is going to meet him and her name is Amanda. Enter Amanda. You know, I'd love to see the screen come back. She doesn't like to look at the boy. She makes it clear: "It's Gonna Do Pray", ladies, why do you always come to the club with a friend who doesn't look as pretty as you?

Yeah, and guys, just when you're about to get the cute number, a friend shows up and completely ruins it. Yes, let me set the scene, Alicia. Hello. You are kind of cute. Oh, you're cute too. Here comes the friend Who are you? are you? you? Then they turn to his friend, who hates him, hates Harry Payne. Are you enough? Hey? You look like an ass, couldn't you be someone else exactly? Are ? If I don't get the man, no one will understand the man. Total Recall Predator, commando action movies. I love them. Favorite action hero. Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Yes, because Swats always asks, huh? Hey, what the hell is going on me? do wrong And he's always trying to explain his drama to other people who don't care, so some men just try to kill me. They think they should fight or something. Harry from work. He was the boss. He organized a lot in my hands. He bleeds on my knives. He tried to take my life and knock me down. So you know now. It's after a few cold days. It's hot outside and I like warm weather because it warms me up. That's my way of joking.

When my chicken has a birthday, I don't tell him because he wouldn't understand. So I have another one. animal joke woof woof woof woof That's a joke you can take home for your dog ha ha Simon, do you have a dog? Will you tell my joke to your dogs? I was thinking about that when you said it. Yes, let me hear it. Work, work, work, work. I'm not. They will understand. Can you both try this my accent? Thanks for making me sound so sexy. Does anyone like seeing couples kissing in public? Not now? What will I do? and every time I do it, I always walk up to them and look directly at them and they usually stop and then ask me if you mind.

I tell them I don't care. My name is Candace, and in case you want. follow me This is what I look like from behind, oh septic. Don't worry. I know what you're thinking about Harry Potter, the nasty quidditch accident. Do you know I can't stand I'm sorry, I'm sorry, let me emphasize? Do you know what I can't stand? Well, look on the bright side, never at Disney. Now I'm just going to throw out a disclaimer if I get too forceful, please stop me. I want to keep my profit. Otherwise, how would I hate the jacuzzi? I'm kidding, I'm kidding, it's a pool.

There I was in the cinema watching the new James Bond movie the other day and then it made me think, you know, maybe I would have liked to try, you know, being James Bond. But obviously. I'm a little inhibited. Mr Bond was waiting for you, Noli, but this isn't the first Britain's Got Talent event I've attended. In fact, funnily enough I was on a live tour in Manchester two years ago and the staff couldn't do it. Getting people out of the way to get us to a seat and then when we finally got there the view was just fantastic.

And we sat down and my sister touched me on the shoulder. I turned around and never forget it while I. live, Jack said. We are very lucky that you are disabled. You can't sectorize anywhere. Thank you so much. I've been to Malibu Ok excellent Well I'm that age now all my friends are married and the married ones forget How horrible it is to be single do they love to call me and complain about their relationship problems? I always understand, you are so lucky to be single. I come home, my wife starts nagging, nagging, nagging, as if she had to nag me myself.

I got home, what time do I call this? Why do I never wash the dishes? Sometimes I think I don't appreciate myself. I haven't always been a comedian. I did some weird jobs. I used to clean houses and I admit it. I was tempted to steal. I didn't steal because the Bible says you shall not steal, but nowhere does it say you shall not barter. I took a stereo walkman for laughs. I kicked a plasma screen to the left. I like it, if I'm from Africa. I moved here ten years ago, and as soon as I moved here I heard a lot of Brits talking about the financial crisis and the recession.

I'm from Africa. What are you maniacs talking about? You call that a crisis, if it is a crisis, where is UNICEF? Where is Bono? Hahahahaha I haven't seen anyone saying the concert in the UK. You can tell me it's a financial crisis when their planes fly over Birmingham throwing fish and chips out the window. It will be a financial crisis when your ads on TV see this guy having to walk five miles. one day to get a bottle of WKD blue And 100% you have a financial crisis when India starts opening centers here. Can you imagine some poor thing from Mumbai ending up speaking?

Thank you very much Alright, so guys, I'm a little nervous about introducing you to add because you talk too much and it gets me in trouble. But I want you to be nice to him. He's only 12 and he's been under my bed in a box for the last three months Covering the pigeon I read oh where have you taken me Jane through all these people I told you about this morning? We are auditioning. , I see that Alesha Dixon once actually came to dance at my house in Solomon. No, Alicia is at the Citycam dance day. I told you this morning on Simon Cowell's porch.

That's so, so, so outrageous, hey, stop joking. Come on. We need you with our rats or they will kill you, okay? Who is that at the end, not David Walliams? Know? David Walliams's pleasant walk made the Canals bas-relief, David William. No Williams Williams is like the greatest comedic genius of our time. Do you know that he fulfilled me? Will that coffee be with no sugar and no sweetener? Do we have to make a very hot fire? But the Lord decided that today would be the day we would not have water. So we have no choice but to close it.

But you already know it. , there is no Who is that watching David Hasselhoff return? Thanks from someone with a boot. Are you saying we're in the same room as Hammond Run? Oh, cheaper by the dozen. Why didn't you say who it is that seems funny at the end? That's Simon Cowell. Everyone knows Simon Cowell. like the king of england. He wears his pants up to here. If so, what is his

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? James, what is his

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? He cleans? What a wash, huh? Is it a washing machine? Does he ignore himself? No, he's a so you're telling me that he doesn't do anything, the guy doesn't do anything? laughing.

I don't want to get into the fucking dance. He drops the ball. This is executed. Call me bubbles, everyone does the Daily Pass today. I would say they will help us exercise. So anyone for your hands, again extended, squatting, Light baby or Martin Fowler, there's hot work, I'd be hitting oh. He's going to be here. Oh man. You're sure to get a fantastic guy. You know I'm going to meet her. Hello. Oh thanks. start oh my god. I mean I saw this one. That's even more one. Oh, wow. Oh oh my god. Have you seen that the bacteria here are horrible?

It's not my right, Kim. Oh, don't ask me a little, oh. Hey, can you say goodnight to me. You speak English? It's my knife, come on. Hey. Let's say something now: What, why not? It's fantastic, come on, gifts eat dirt. Yeah? Oh no, listen to it English Spanish for free, okay? Hey, Wendy, listen to me. You think I'm stupid. ? Well, you don't want to talk anymore. No, okay, and now oh yeah. I want you to know how to sing, you know what, yes, yes, yes. Well, we hear you. It's about wow and you get it, yeah.

Music please, we have to sing something for you. It's okay? Don't look, look at the audience as if you feel: Come on. No problem. You cry. Alright? All together well, no, please, come at this age. What's good talent, okay? Go get that? feeling three four amazing oh