Tom Segura Keeps It High and Tight While Eating Spicy Wings | Hot Ones

You with me, Tommy, that's worse than I remember. Hey, what's happening everyone? First we feast. I'm Sean Evans and you're seeing the hottest guys on the show with interesting questions and even hotter

wings

. Today we welcome our dear friend Tom. Segura, his latest pig ball special, is now available on Netflix and the man is a podcast Factory, Your Mother's House, Two Bears, a Cave, and Tom Segura and the Spaniard, wherever you get your podcast this season, included some of our favorite past guests along with some new

ones

. faces and who better to welcome to the table than my brother Gavin's all-time favorite hot

ones

episode my dear friend Tom Segura Tom welcome back to hot ones it's good to be back Shawn thank you for inviting me to this new normality and that's good to be with you are you in New York or are your knees buckling?

I'm in New York yeah I can tell for the NYPD that's the cop's son in the second round yeah let's do it let's beat him up yeah that's good so this pandemic hits me like a unique situation for comedians because on the one hand you have this singular universal theme that everyone can relate to, but on the other hand, it's this totally miserable experience that everyone wants to escape from and there have been a lot of PR fallout from it. celebrity singing with two famous people. Posting poolside photos saying: I'm bored, why are moments like these so difficult for celebrities to navigate?

Because for some reason we think that if you're famous you're smart or you're knowledgeable and you know what to do, and then we look like you know, hey, this actor is really hot right now, it's like, well, he's not a thinker, he is an actor. We should stop being surprised that actors or singers don't navigate the waters perfectly because you know, why would they? It's our own expectations. We deserve to be disappointed by this. I heard you put forward an interesting theory about two bears in a cave where you suggested that, despite being larger than life, Michael Jordan is a much more identifiable celebrity than, say, John Travolta because of his line of work when You're watching the interviews, specifically the interviews with him, and you're really thinking about the fact that this guy is as famous as probably no one on earth has ever been and you see what that means, that kind of fame.

It is, let's say, entertainment artists, artists like singers, Madonna, actors, Travolta, Garth Brooks, these people get really famous and they get a little weird, and my theory is that it's all because of sports, no matter what. You start in sports, that's what makes you. It's the same as any other man, so I think when you're surrounded by those kinds of people, you get depressed, whereas if you're an actor, you're a singer, you're surrounded by directors, PR people, red carpets, it's all about everything. . be like you're amazing you're amazing you're amazing and I think that bothers them a little because those three people like us are starting our strange overdose, but what I'm doing is for the people, man, look, that's nice.

So for people, it was actually a pretty poetic segue into the next question because maybe underneath this video are the most connected fans you've ever seen. I'm sure the comments are full of people telling us to keep our genes

high

and

tight

and begging Garth Brooks to bring closure to the family like someone who understands the art of humor what's the value of an inside joke for I don't know it's like what's the value of a secret it's almost like when you tell a secret to someone, you reveal something to them and you have that bond and with inside jokes it's like you're just extending that bond, it becomes like a secret handshake or as a wink when we did the self-service inside joke, people would record themselves doing it. and be more elaborate and you know, the self-service person said, yeah, what can I do for you? and it's like, hey gene, I was wondering if you could put in a hot bag of poutine and Hitler would wonder if you could give me some extra fries with that and the first bill was fine with that because they would never acknowledge that someone was telling them something crazy and that was definitely one of my favorites, how is this one still pretty light?

Let's see the big, the big down there, so when our friend Bert Kreischer was on the show last time we pulled back the curtain on your boys' legendary dance battle, one in which Bert seems to freely admit that you won, but Bert He seemed a little hurt by that post. Malone didn't like the video of him, how important it was to Missy Elliott. really get to you, come on dude, that was amazing, I mean Missy Elliott, it's hard to describe, you know what a genius this woman is and she pioneered the style of song she was making and of course the ones by Us Who Grew Up with her we know that she rewrote the books on music videos like she had the best video ever, I mean, on another level and I think it put me off.

She said: Who do you think she won? That was like her tweet when she retweeted it I like that you're speaking clearly it's me and then you also dressed up as Sensei Steven Seagal what is it about Steven Seagal that makes him such a prolific target comedy? I mean, there are several things, number one, he's the only person who In Mike, my limited experience in Hollywood is that people are willing and freely to talk immensely like people who never gossip, they're like that guy is a piece of rubbish and they will tell you stories to back it up, incredible stories.

I enjoy that too. he's on this plan right now to release like seven action movies a year, he weighs like 350 pounds, he's fighting people sitting down and the premise of the movie is going to be like we're in Afghanistan, you're like that's Milwaukee. I could see that's where the Brewers play like they ain't even trying to hide where they are All that combined makes you go like man, this guy, oh damn, I've been dunking 'em all, dunking that man, it's still fun, We are still in that place. he still laughs with a weird vibe, you recently made national headlines for comments he made about professional wrestling fans calling them idiots and lumping them in with flat earthers and anti-vaxxers.

How was the reaction this time compared to some of your past controversies? I saw a bunch of active wrestlers threaten to beat your ass, yeah, yeah, yeah, well, we'd have to write a script, but yeah, that would be cool. The funny thing about this is that it was an improvised conversation on a podcast, but at the same time. I also like, you know, I don't care, I think it's cute that they play pretend, I think it's sweet that they have other friends that dress up with them and you know, I think the fans say hey man, you like what you like , do you know something.

People like fancier things, so people like to play pretend. I think it's nice that those people do it and I support them. No comedian Matt McCarthy once compared wrestling to wrestling, saying that they are both essentially about a single man seeking justice presented in the funniest way. possible, yes, and I respect the fact that he watches, it's fun, like I already told you. I love fragments. I love the inside jokes and I love that they're committed to these things and willing to do what they know. It's that form of entertainment I respect that they are athletes, so people were saying everything you're trying to say, these aren't, I think they're definitely athletes, they're not wrestlers, there's no champion, that's my favorite thing about wrestling. free it's like this guy is an eight-time world champion like, oh yeah, that's cute, well, there's the Tooth Fairy involved, I don't know what, like you're not a champion if there's no real competition, but that's not it matters.

I digress again, they're great, okay Tom, you're ready to move on to five. I almost accidentally grabbed ten dogs here when they didn't set the table for you, how is this one? Oh brah, that's a lot, that's a big house, okay, okay Tom, as you know, we have a recurring segment on our show called explains that Graham, where you do a deep dive on our Instagram guest, you take interesting photos that need more context. First things first, as a college football fan, do you have any favorite memories from the day of him doing long takes at Memorial Stadium in Lincoln, Nebraska, that was the best thank you, Jeremiah, sir.

I mean, I feel like it was a dream come true. I know there are a few things you can't believe are happening to you. That atmosphere is what's great about college football, specifically what they do at Nebraska, it was exciting. The other, which by the way, has been incredible, is arriving. I drive press cars so I thank Matt Phair the smoking tire who said yeah I'd love to be able to do that he was like you can and then there was a McLaren at my house the next day so I love it

while

we're at it.

On the topic, how has your experience with tik-tok been so far? Well, my experience with tick top is that I'm married to a tic tac addict, but she has a whole theory about how to experience tic tac the right way, she says. That tic tac wants you to see like people

eating

ice cream and playing in the sand, but there is a darker and deeper lane of tic tac that you have to find. Christina Pete injured. I'm tic tac, she's in the water championship, but she. she finds them like meth addicts, people who commit crimes, older people who are oversexed and they really are doing an amazing job.

I don't deserve any credit, she finds it all and shares it with me and she is truly remarkable. Tic tac is my favorite social network. media platform I just found out that my last post was removed because it violated the Community Guidelines, well wait until you see what I do next. Damn, I got it right. Oh, it smells young, yeah, mm-hmm, getting real here, yeah, if it's real, yeah. So I want to ask you about the Dave Chappelle 8:46 set that came out recently. It's interesting to me in many ways because Entertainment has really found itself caught off guard in these months of kovat and social unrest.

The music in particular seems to have dropped the ball completely. hasn't captured anything in the zeitgeist but if you look at what's breaking through it seems to be the voices of comedians, does that surprise you at all or are there people in the comedy world who say yes of course What would be like this? I don't think it's surprising, I mean, you really know there are incredibly prolific thinkers, Chappelle was one of them, he did something really cool, man. Dave, this whole thing has always been like, you're not being funny, be interesting, it's kind of like that. a masterclass on how to forget about the weather and see how when he's not laughing you're still so engaged, that's really one of the beautiful things about it, like a piece of art, you know it's that interesting, yeah, it's interesting .

You say it that way because there's a lot of talk about whether sets like the Chappelle or Hanna Gatsby specials are funny in the traditional stand-up back sense. Do you think that's just food for thought or do you see something broader changing? Yeah, I mean, I don't know if we're going to see a big change, that's an interesting point, like you can see more and more people doing it, but this is what you better be good at if you say I'm not going to. joke so much, I'm just going to share my thoughts on something that better be really interesting.

The picture, yeah, yeah, it's up to me, okay, damn, Tom, I know your mouth is on. fire right now, but we have a gift that will hopefully bring you some comfort. We reached out to two of his friends in the comedy world and asked them for their burning questions for Tom Segura, so here they are and first up, he's hosting tacos with a fellow comedian hello Suz Trejo who has a hot question for you Tom Segura oh, it's the Pacers, hey Tom, you're probably shaking your butt right now. I feel for you, let me help you stop thinking about the pain.

You must be having it right now and I want to ask you what your favorite street joke was when you were a kid. Thanks Brandon, good luck. All the good ones are pretty racist, but I think, oh my God, what was Moby Dick? Dad's name, what Moby Dick's dad was called, an erection explodes. Next, we have your friend Bert Kreischer with a very important question. Tom Segura comedian Bert Kreischer, you know who I am, if you can replace an actor as a superhero in a superhero franchise. superhero, what actor would you replace and what would you bring to the role that you think that actor doesn't have?

I don't. He had so many questions within his question why do you allow them? I know who, why would you think what else you feel who brings to the party? What is your question? Man. I feel like I would be Batman. Which Batman would he replace? I mean, Val Kilmer is obviously and what would he break? I mean, a lot of it is just me. I'm more John Blaze than him, man, bye Tom, watch your eyes with the napkin and that was pretty lame. Are you OK. I have a lot of anxiety on this one.moment.

My mouth hurts and I remember telling your team. I remember how much this sucks. I remember the bomb was the one that made me change my life yes you and I both fine so like many I'm struggling with basic manners and etiquette during the pandemic so now it's one of the comedies with the most thoughtful minds in front of I thought it would be a great idea to get Tommy Buns' perspective on these new challenges of everyday life. There are reports that flushing the toilet releases a plume of potentially Kovat-infected particles up to one meter into the air.

Are you flushing public toilets or Is it better to let the sleeping blogs lie oh my god, oh my god? breaststroke, leave it, buffets are too big PR to fail a buffet, who's going to hit?, get on the feydau, put those animals that way, they don't clean that and then let me bounce off a hypothetical, you see an elderly woman limping towards the exit of a pharmacy at the same time you hit her in the neck, which is clearly over 70 years old and breathing problems, do you keep the door open or let it slam shut to fend for itself?

I mean, I'm a gentleman. I'm going to keep the door open, but I could tell him he should stay home more often, dude, that's worse than I remember, oh my god, dude, oh my god, can we just call it an end? You can always call it the end, Tommy, yeah, we. I have to go, my God, how is this one? Very attractive, quite attractive. Oh, do you have a Mount Rushmore of comedy specials for those of us who have already seen every episode of 90 Day Fiancé? How good is that program? It's the best, yes, yes, you have to do it. rave, pick your poison, whether it's bigger, blacker or brings the pain, it has to be there, oh my god, and then I feel like you have to give one to Carlin.

Are you all sick or playing in New York, it was the best thing he did I liked the style he did, he's also a great thinker, like we were talking, really thoughtful, it would be fascinating to have him now and the last one I probably chose him with killed softly, Dave Chappelle, okay my man, every time I do this. I feel like it really helps my sinuses, well there's a positive, okay I did a dab, okay, I put it in there too, cheers mate, cheers, okay Tom here we are at the end of our meal , Ten Blasi, Not Chicken Wings and There's Only One Obstacle Between You and Sauce Valhalla Last time you were on the show, we left it on a

high

note and this time we hope to leave fans with the same warm and fuzzy feeling with the that DJ dad tells them a message of hope. moms anxiously awaiting the return of live stand-up in 2025 sucks, but it's building up, it's building up tension and pressure, you know what happens when the pressure builds, I shoot, what happens, something explodes and then something goes blow.

We will be out there dancing, laughing, moving together again in big places, it will be fun, we will be able to cough again, people will spit in each other's faces, people will have sex in front of other people and everything will be fun. party, we will be together fighting the invisible virus, I don't even know why I said, I just hope everyone gets their citizenship, the streets have spoken and look at you Tom Segura, back for another round of hot and clearing the board for the second time. and now there's nothing left to do but roll out the red carpet for you Tom Segura, this camera or possibly a B camera, if you set one up, let people know what you're going through in your life, oh my gosh, well I'm doing many podcasts. your mom's house podcast two bears a cave Tom Segura in Spanish we are doing a lot of original content we are putting it on all our YouTube channels on Instagram I will try to get back to stand-up hopefully I will be on Coming soon on stage and on tour in a nearby city of you.