Raising A Child With Selective Mutism | MY CHILD WON'T TALK | Full Documentary | Origin

These three girls seem perfectly normal, they do things perfectly, but there is something very disconcerting about them. I don't think she can explain what's going on, people really ask, well, where did it come from? Well, who knows, who knows, we certainly don't. They have

selective

mutism

. They can

talk

, but not with most people. I think there's something wrong with me. It's heartbreaking. They can't go on without

talk

ing. How can you have a relationship with a

child

who doesn't talk to you? And she wants to do it, she wants to be just like everyone else, but speaking a single word to her loved ones may seem impossible.

You're ready to talk now. Your

selective

mutism

is not easy to understand. Red is 8. Most people never. I hear her talk but she has found other ways to express her point of view. I don't think I can explain what's really going on. Like all good parents, we have tried bribery and corruption. We'll take you to the park if you talk at school today. If you answer the registration she will buy your chocolate bar she has a set of rules about who she can and cannot talk to these rules are different for each selectively mute

child

she reads talks normally with her mother and father, but many of her relatives never They have done it I heard her, she has a best friend who she chats happily with, but she never talks at school.

Selective mutism. The formal definition is the constant failure to speak in certain social situations. Most of them are fine with the immediate family, but each of these children has their own pattern of who they can talk to and who they can't, but the pattern is disconcerting. There is no rhyme or reason to his silence. Ten year old Megan goes to cheer every Thursday but she never cheers the only place Megan really talks openly is at home with her family but not when anyone else is there especially it's not a loud

documentary

I'm very loud and if not If you were here now she would be saying look, they are a little bit bigger than me or they could I make you talk, if I try hard enough, it often turns out that these kids just do it deliberately, they just put it on, but they couldn't really keep it up. because of its intensity or its persistence, there are children who have broken limbs and I have not cried it may be a silent tear but there is no movement no there is no cry for help they simply could not keep it up for so long if this was deliberate you can talk you can talk but no you speak why you don't speak read It's difficult to explain, but even more difficult for those who read.

He doesn't talk to the Reds. Grandpa John and her partner Eileen loved having her granddaughter stay, but in the eight years since she was born to her they haven't heard her utter a word, obviously her. cries, the baby is with some parents and grandparents day, but when it comes to talking nothing, that's it, grandpa may not hear much of the reading, but he still sees her regularly, she hopes to visit her house in Yorkshire, they are different. I have no explanation for this as such, it's nothing we've done to her mentally, physically or anything else or ever shown, it's a love and affection in front of the big silent rooms here, you'd want to go far away and you'd be gone.

You, John, haven't stopped talking, serve as a gunner and talk, what is a swamp? And speaking was about to shine a lot easier than this, right? But after eight years of constant chatter, she's getting a little tired. and you put any effort into this shoe, no toe or you shake your head, you know you don't, I don't want this thing from yesterday you want to make me angry, I should communicate in everything, apart from talking, how are you doing in school, you are the best in the class What is your favorite thing? you do it it's hard frustrating you know you want to pick her up and strangle us I talk to me hey but you know you can't because that wouldn't do anything although she seems like a confident and happy little soul surprisingly well read finds the idea of ​​talking For grandpa and for most of the people is strangely scary and stressful.

Well, I think the best way to understand selective mutism is to think of it as a phobia, this intense and very real fear of talking to someone or having someone hear your voice. All those kids are doing is controlling their own anxiety by not talking they are relieving themselves of stress, but dealing with a girl who can talk but doesn't is painful, especially when she is your only granddaughter. I think well, it's something wrong with corn, it might be, you know. heartbreaking is not that strong the word used is heartbreaking the family has decided they need help reading talking to their grandfather how can you have a relationship with a child who doesn't talk to you so I think the older he gets the harder it will just be.

Hope and pray that one day he will overcome this condition, he will speak freely like a normal child, but starting to speak is not easy when you have avoided it for as long as you can remember. Mutism usually begins very early in life. Megan's parents believe her problem began on a vacation swimming trip when Megan was just four years old. She talked to someone in the water thinking she was me. She got so angry. She had never seen anyone so angry. She was like. she was sobbing and she was very upset and she was very strange on those holidays if she got out of my sight she panicked it was like a real panic attack her heart beat faster if she sat on your lap you could feel her heart I loved them selective The muteness often It seems to be triggered by everyday incidents, these are simply normal life events that most of us would deal with, but if you have an anxious disposition in the office anyway, it is much worse and at the height of this anxiety they come to associate it with talking.

With everyone. nice and quiet for us to check in please Oliver when Megan started school the speech anxiety didn't go away mr. Lockerby is her class teacher and she never heard her say a word. Megan, well, sometimes she can become almost invisible in class. She never volunteers. She never raises her hand. It is very difficult to communicate with her and know what she is trying to communicate with. I really think she has a lot of gift. Leaves the page. It would be nice if it came out of her mouth. Do you think she won't talk to you?

I hope so. I really believe it, but I'm. She wasn't expecting it, so she didn't hold her breath. Megan will soon leave her elementary school shelter before she does. The staff and her parents will make one last attempt to get Megan to talk. People might think we're a little funny. I don't talk but I'm serious about only going to high school next year so I really wanted to talk before high school about what you do to get a job if you can't talk you can't communicate what you do how much you want to talk Megan I think she wants to talk a lot but he can not.

I think she bothers you, right? Do you think one day you will speak? When will it be tomorrow? Not Monday or Monday if selective mutism is not addressed from the beginning. so potentially there are serious consequences that we know of adults who did not receive adequate help as children and have become socially anxious, socially phobic or agoraphobic, completely isolated, dependent on family members and ultimately this will lead to depression. Reds I am firmly desperate for her to start talking to her grandfather. Tell me what kind of grandfather she is. You would like to be able to talk to your grandfather.

Do you think you will? But selective mutism is not common and can be difficult. For specialized advice, we put the family in touch with speech therapist Maggie Johnson, who has written the most comprehensive treatment guide, so if Carroll could ask you first to tell me a little about red in terms of our general character, well , she's an 8 year old girl, she's a very typical eight year old, very loud mm-hmm, well, a real chatterbox, yeah, and this hasn't been a situation for you, has it? John, thirdly, no. Shane feels so hard it's hard to put into words, but yes. it feels painful you know I can it must be very personal it does it it looks very very personal you know like I have done something wrong but I have not done anything wrong no no no absolutely it is very difficult for us to identify with a phobia of talking to friends, family and people who care about you are often the same people the child wants to talk to the most who find it hardest to talk to and, as a consolation, this is definitely the case, they might be afraid. that he's letting you down that he's letting you down that he's letting you down by not talking to your dad and there are all these thoughts running through your mind and in the end it's easy to say I'm too busy, it's just easier to avoid it Maggie suggests some new ideas that the family could try.

A good step is a talking book. These should help you read to take small steps to start speaking. He is having a conversation with you knowing that you are on the phone to reduce the Reds' anxiety. Grandpa is recommended. Telling Red that he knows how she feels is a reassurance for you to understand that speaking for her is actually quite scary right now and gives you this horrible feeling of panic, but you know she's not doing it deliberately, it's just about the general message that You'll get there and we don't have to talk right away, we can just communicate another way, sure, yeah, you don't know what happens when you read Ian exactly.

I still love you so much, something exactly if there is a selective thing. Mutism requires patience for the last five years. Megan has been babysat at school by a lady named Mrs. Johnson Megan doesn't talk at school so Mrs. Johnson Johnson has to find other ways for the silent student to communicate today. Her last help to talk about herself is a notebook which is good and worked. Good to hear two weeks before Mrs. Johnson's vacation she has never stopped asking her questions but to date she has never had an answer but today there is a plan ma'am.

Johnson comes to visit Megan at home. You're worried about the lady. Johnson realizes that Megan will try to talk in front of her depends on how Meghan feels, isn't that scary? I don't know, the operation will be carried out by Meghan's speech therapist, Miriam, after five months of work that she has now. I heard Megan speak. My goal for this session is to allow you to hear her voice and maybe towards the end feel comfortable, maybe answering some little questions of yours with just a yes or no, looking at you and talking to you, even if it's just one word.

Miriam is Using the same careful approach used to treat phobias, helping Megan manage her anxiety and slowly let new people hear her voice. The only people allowed in the room will be Miriam, Mom, and Megan, but we're going to do everything very, very slowly. Just like we did with me, everyone else has to wait outside behind closed doors, but Megan agreed to have two remotely controlled cameras in the room. Okay, I'll start one, three, five, seven, nine, the procedure moves on to stage two, opening the door. door and we're going to have this door ajar and you can go down the stairs, okay, January March, it's a little voice but you can hear it in the hallway Stage three ma'am.

Johnson joins from stairs one, three, four, six, stage for the critical stage, Mrs. Johnson will now enter the room and see Megan from I K M coloring the Sun, which was a great step as she gave a good , yeah, well, you know, that's the most we've seen, you know, Megan is Megan danielle has also been trying to overcome selective mutism. Last year, at the age of 14, Danielle still only spoke to a small number of people, but then she made a breakthrough in brilliant, yes, to see how it comes, she is very professional, dad, I was in Felicity, it was fantastic to see the progress. which she did a year ago, Danielle was still answering questions with a whiteboard today, she can just open her mouth and talk, it's like if you're a singer and you want to go on stage the first time you get this incredible adrenaline rush. like this Wow, you know I'm doing it and no one will come back in, although it's amazing, it really felt like other children Danielle fell into the clutches of selective mutism when she was very little, you can tell I'm not comfortable.

I was almost there. This tight shirt her family tried everything but they couldn't get her only son to talk. I remember thinking I'm special, but as I got older I realized I wasn't special, I was just different in a bad way, why? When you started talking it was the mental block because it's not that you can't physically talk, not because it feels like you can't physically talk, that's what it feels like, it was a hard 11 years, you know, and it's a lot of stress. in everything family relationships you know you'll encounter because of the frustrations that Char has, they can become verbally and physically aggressive and we've had both when he got to high school.

Danielle still didn't talk to the staff or students, the stress became daily school she encountered a traumatic business she physically had symptoms of illness headaches sweating hands a little aggressively bubbly we used to have a little punching session sometimes it's just moral anxiety why scientists think it's spreading Danielle came up with our own drastic solutions asked to move to another school when no one knew about herproblem thought it would be possible to talk as long as I could start the moment I arrived I walked in the door I met the school secretary I told her this is Danielle and Danielle said hello and I was like I could believe it and I told my mom I had never felt so free and I was like, oh yeah, that was amazing and it was so natural.

Danielle is now much more confident in speaking, but after avoiding speaking for over a decade her behavior was deeply ingrained, she is still struggling to completely get rid of her fear, yes. It's not over yet, yes, there are quite a few things she still isn't I can do, like talk on the phone, all that kind of stuff, donut shops, restaurants, it's still part of my life, so what's your goal? Let everyone feel normal. normal gar be 1500 kill a spring move into summer everyone is working on the first small steps forward there are no shortcuts with selective mutism unless you start to dive into it from the roots between 2 and 4 years of age which you must be prepared for For a pretty slow but steady process, those kids have to work really hard to deal with this and really break this barrier, but their efforts are starting to show some results thanks to Maggie's suggestion.

Red has given Grandpa a gift with a magical surprise. Inside the built-in voice recorder means she can let him start listening to her voice. I love eating a salad, it may not be a conversation, but to Grandpa these are Red's first words were oh well, that's absolutely fantastic, isn't it? And you said it all. That's brilliant, you can be a little charlatan, can't you? You know how much I love You? That's a lot, isn't it? It doesn't matter that you don't talk to me, it's not important, really? because we still love you so much, but someday maybe in Dover the same slow, creeping progress will be underway, okay, yes, Megan's class teacher, mr.

Lockerby can now join the strange ritual of Megan's therapy sessions. I hope I don't mess it up when I get in. Do something stupid that disrupts the entire process. Let's start over. Three at 21:24 Megan What color is the sun? Fantastic, brilliant, really. very good we just sucked sweet voice it was justice wait amazing and you think this is something normal that everyone normally does and she doesn't do it when she did it it was normal and it felt good she missed it she said she liked it because she had never listened to Meghan before Yo, Megan, how do you feel about this?

It seems that some people are still off limits, although Danielle has come a long way in the last year, she is still working on completely freeing herself from selective mutism, even now she avoids everyday tasks. she likes to go shopping because she is worried about an unexpected conversation they just sweat a lot my heart races it will be another panic that may seem absurd but after years of not talking even buying a bar of chocolate still triggers an irrational fear but today Danielle is determined to get over it I want to try to get over the anxiety I want to try to prove to myself that I can do normal things I'm not just a kid who can't do anything How are you feeling I'm scared Danielle has decided that there is strength in numbers, she has brought her mother and a friend in case he has difficulties, you are ready first, just do it with his mind in the box and the talkative women behind, it seems difficult for Danielle to concentrate on the chocolate pantries, there Papac maintenance, just choose. as much as you can Thank you, she looks around and just walks to the wine line for service, it just adds to the stress people do, that makes it good, you made it this far.

Selective mutism is not always easy to escape. Danielle's failure is a painful setback, well, yeah, sure. give me five, it's horrible because I get angry because I can see what she's going through, you know, and it's hard. I really wish she could have done it, but I mean, I looked at her face and she couldn't. I just knew that she couldn't and I could. I felt quite upset seeing her so upset. I'm sorry and she wants to do it, she wants to be just like everyone else and we both want her to do that. You seemed pretty angry to me. and that was only because she couldn't buy anything else because she just couldn't do it, yeah, exactly in front of me and I'm exactly unkind at the best of times when it stops you from doing something you want to do, especially buying chocolate.

It just really bothers me. I don't want it, I don't need it. You know, things I want to do and I don't want anxiety hanging over me all the time since the first time Megan spoke in front of her. Class Teacher, things have gotten pretty quiet, it's been seven weeks now and despite regular therapy sessions Mr. Luckabee is having trouble engaging in conversation with Megan, he never responded, he told me directly to the face, even doing the registration. I looked at her and she is still looking at me and not moving for math. I think she will take more time. than I initially thought yes, it's a lot harder for her than I think.

I think we all think there's a lot more anxiety in an attempt to move things forward. Megan's speech therapist, Miriam, has come up with a bold plan that Megan is going to do. She reveals her fears about talking to her entire class and asks for her help. Okay, this is Megan in her own words, so this is what she really wants you to know about her and her struggles. her. She's not sure what reactions she might receive. Megan has decided to stay. outside Miriam reads her message out loud so she called this my story as you know my name is Megan and I'm 10 years old when I was very young I developed a fear of public speaking this worry got worse and worse until became a Habit over the years, the habit has stuck and I find that I can only talk to certain people, like all habits.

This one is very difficult to break. Every time I try to speak, I get the same worried feeling I felt all those years ago. I really want to get over this but I need your help I would like you to treat me the same as anyone else and talk to me like any of your friends if I don't say much at first please don't give up and it will become easier and easier for me thanks for listening and thanks for trying to understand okay how do you feel about Nathan Megan no she's not like a month she's talking about like saying he's bad things she's going to be she really wouldn't be a little bit quieter than the others and I have Megan's email address and now we like to chat online and she asked me questions and I quite enjoy it, it's really a lot of fun, have you ever tried to log in and know, yeah, bye bye?

I'm going to try, try that, I think hope

full

y I could, it's really nice, it's funny, Miriam, because I thought about Megan for a long time and I guess it's because the kids knew. I mean, we've gotten into the habit of not talking to Megan, so we need to change our habits somehow by just knowing how to say the strange words are here and there. Red's mother has her own cunning plan to put into action. The girl who barely talks to anyone is about to receive a very unlikely gift. Yes, thanks. Maggie Johnson has suggested that Red could use a mobile phone to start talking to Grandpa by leaving him a voicemail, yes, not to look at obviously, you can swipe it sometimes, yes, but the prospects are not very good, you never know has felt particularly comfortable with a phone, but Then I guess it's because the point is that you talk, can you listen?

Only once in a while I accidentally picked it up and then I couldn't speak and hung up. Grandpa has come from Yorkshire for a visit. Oh, he has come to put the mobile phone to work. Action If her plan works Grandpa and granddaughter would have the means to start communicating while they are away and well, that's fancy, isn't it with a slider? That means you could call me and leave me a message. Red is convinced to try it. She hangs up the phone as long as the grandfather is far, far away, but a grandfather must be willing to do everything possible to overcome this extraordinary condition.

I'll give you a couple of minutes to come back and then I'll call. you but don't answer me and I will leave you a message then you can listen to my message and then you confirm me and I can listen to your message that you live for me well Ready Steady Be careful here let's see if I can do this movement ringing hello red this is the message number one. I'm at the end of the garden and I would just like to say that I'm very happy to be here and see you again today, okay, bye, fingers crossed you'll let me. a message we have a message this is going to be fantastic first in words it's great to have you here that's absolutely brilliant that's a step she has never ever spoken to me lovingly on the phone she would never do that that's a great step it works, you got my message, Yes, it works, it's a brilliant idea, right?

Yeah, so now you'll be able to reassure me and then I think who calls me from time to time I look, I think oh, it's Ray Cheese, he left me a message. I really like that, okay, should we go and tell mom it worked? We try to let mom hear it. Okay, a lump is in my throat to be honest and at first I had to pull myself together. to keep you together but you know I was jumping up and down inside your voice you're eight almost nine years old for this you can't take it in you can't believe it's happening I'm looking forward to it Start with the phone calls now, that's what I'm looking forward to eagerly, still determined to get rid of selective mutism.

Danielle has set herself another challenge because she never spoke at her old school. Interestingly, Danielle's oldest friends have yet to hear her talk about a problem. She's now planning to address how important it will be to talk to your friends. I mean a lot, I mean a lot to them and I thought we could, you know, laugh without me being quiet. one, although I had a good offer, Dan would like to go out with his friends more and do things and I would like her to do it because that will also open up my social skills, but not being able to talk to the friend he wants to be with makes him difficult, but there is a friend from her old school that Danielle talks to, oh how nice.

Bethan is Danielle's oldest friend and she has always had to act as a translator with the rest of the group. she did it, which is pointing out to me: yes, you had to be like my spokesperson, flooding here, speak for me, it's this word, that strong, this rain clicks on justice. Bevins is going to host the friends' reunion, but after years of silence, what do you say? I don't know what this place is like, but it's a little embarrassing when you suddenly start talking to someone. I'm so scared that if I walk in and say everything you know, hello or something, something normal, but normal people would do it, yeah, they would do it.

It would be a party, wouldn't they be completely happy? The day dawns and Daniele is ready to try to take another step forward. She and Bethan await the arrival of their old friends Harriet and Nicole. It is not known. Oh, I don't think so. Hope

full

y now thanks to our A you would still be more mature and obviously wouldn't jump and see what I mean when you're out in the cold you can't guarantee they will that's what they see anywhere friends haven't seen. for months and the meeting is a joyful affair, but Daniel's mouth remains tightly shut during lunch.

She's still trapped in the old, familiar silence of hers. She continues on with the megaphone when her friends start talking about boys. Danielle's need to talk seems to have completely left her. He knows all my time by the way they come out, you know, going to the park with these poisons and then nagging me to take them out, but if I go out I'm not going to talk and these kids didn't think I was going to. do it so you know I can't do that and then the way they're together is like those three and then me.

Danielle's friends are making the most of teenage life, but when you don't talk to people it's hard to keep up. I'm losing my friends, so either I'm not normal or they're not and I feel great. For Megan, it's almost the end of the school year, she has spring in her step and it's not just the idea of ​​summer. The holidays ahead are fine, I see names please, after six months and 23 therapy sessions in Mr. Luckabee's classroom, something miraculous has begun to happen. Megan, have you seen any changes in the magnetism? I had no idea you'd end up speaking in front of the class.

What is your favorite type of candy? He's also greedy and Megan Miller, that hand lifts you up. I know it appeals to you because it's not something she's done before, so I think it's a really positive thing and she smiles a lot more. Have you talked to Megan? Yes, she has submitted many applications and you were surprised to hear her voice. Yes. So it will be easier for you to respond to people. Now do it for some people, maybe, but not for everyone yet, but Megan has one more test before she finishes the shade next year.

Megan will not be taking classes from Mr. Luckabee will already have to deal with a new class teacher and she's about to be introduced. Okay, you're here because you'll be in my class next year, but will Megan beat Mr. Cornell, she's going to do this, how are you? Ask me in another ten minutes and I'll let you know what we're going to do: we'll just walk around and say ournames first. t's two names okay, my name is Nicki Jones, my name is Millie and I say three quarter eleven in Wales. Danielle's social life is improving, she has made friends at her new school, but she talks to her, she won't give up.

She might just say oh, me. I will never get married, I will never have a boyfriend. I'll forget that I'll let everyone else have them and I'll just sit there and she'll do it, but do you know what she's putting into that? I think I'll always be anxious about certain situations, but I keep going, yeah, I hope to keep going and go further north, Red and his grandfather finally started an unconventional conversation through Red's voicemails. Leave a message and tell me what you're going to do today. I'm going out. With the brown color prediction, today you swam on the island, so you went in a canoe.yes, I have never been in a canoe, that's really good, you have added a new dimension to the relationship, it kind of opened up a new world , but hey, it works, happy birthday, friends, dead, you've never wished me happy birthday before, it was lovely. thanks everyone, grandparents probably understand that and don't think about it, but they know I waited until she was nine before she felt confident enough to say happy birthday grandpa and they know she could have bought me a Ferrari, but that didn't mean anything.

So yes we can move on, but we are finally moving forward and 12 months ago is absolutely fantastic, step by step, everyone is progressing, but it's always those first words that are the hardest, what's your name and how? How old are you Megan? Have you enjoyed the hangars filming yourself? You can see, I don't know if you don't know.