Prince on Muppets Tonight |

voters shoot, you'll excuse me, excuse me, excuse me, no, what can I do for you? I'm starting the show

tonight

, uh-huh, and name it, I'm sure this will be fun. I am the artist formerly known as Prince hmm and I am currently the bear. Nona doesn't like my name, it doesn't have a sound, it's unpronounceable. What's in this kind of monkey business might have kept you out of the draft, but Jake is going to take me out. No, how would your name appear on my list here like that? Oh, it's fine. Dr. Rorschach, I'll play along, I see my mother and a butterfly doing the Mambo on an orange check, the list could be growing for some nameless guy, okay, let's see, we have the railroad crossing, that yin-yang sign we have , thanks boy, security in this place sucks like a Muppet

tonight

with our very special guest began the artist formerly known as Plants Hello everyone, listen, the artist is going up the elevator, boy, this is it, guys, let's hit it a great Muppets tonight.

He's killing me. Oh thanks. Wow, oh, thanks to both of you, you managed to put another small fracture in my skull, oh yeah, just because of that mulch, our Carnival Cruise is canceled and the Three Stooges convention is looking mighty anyway, anyway, the main numbing feature of this night is even Kings. Town House of Wax by the way look for Leona Helmsley in apamea as Edwina the painting we have to go to the nurse mulch brother the movie here is to complete another great season of stories from the veterinarians our whoops whoops whoops and I just wanted to say that you are Best BBQ I've ever had, we're the only team, everyone be careful with this eggnog and I didn't sell any, surprise for Christmas time, and you just got me a videotape, Jamie Jamie.

You freeloaders, there, your mom, look at my mochi, come here, come on, well, I'm back from the nurses' station, how about that city, the House of Wax, pretty creepy, stop, hey, what are you playing, what? you play? Christmas Party '93 I have no idea what you're talking about, I wasn't even at the Christmas party in '93. I was young. It was the eggnog duct tape. I was just trying to fit in, so you're supposed to be ironing my pants. What are you doing here? I'm studying Johnny. studying aha since when do you need a book to be a pants irony this is the correspondence course I'm learning to be an osteopath you know well, bone doctor, that's great, but first of all, a bone doctor is called a bone Secondly, You know I support you in all your intellectual pursuits, but call me old-fashioned.

I need my pants to perform on stage. Thanks Johnny, first let me adjust your back. I don't think don't worry, just relax, take a deep breath, sure, no, hey, Johnny, uh, almost fine, just, oh, yeah, and it feels pretty good, so hey everyone, here's some trivia before he was known as Prince, but before he was known as Prince, he was unknown and like so many other unknowns. He made his first appearance on television with us on a show we called it because it's easier than doing it. Look Jen, yeah man, you have the ugliest dog I've ever seen.

What do you call it? Well, the frontal pain and the brown and blue tears, we call them. alligators ha ha ha ha hey seed ban with old beaks and smiles for all of you bear tracks right yeah why let me know the name of the bear tracks no there are Gator tracks. Oh no, current, what's wrong with his neck? Oh, he's actually an old Muppet. ha, injury from that sketch, it looks like I have a stiff neck hey, hey, I heard you have a stiff neck, yes, I can cure it, you know, I have been trained in the fine art of osteopathy since when, since I bought this book , What happened? the book, oh I broke its spine anyway, let me show you how it works, wait a second, so I don't know, just relax and take it, no sir, sell this route, it's really not necessary, think of a butterfly , butterfly, butterfly, screaming, flying, can you?

Look at them well, yes, yes, yes, well, are they men? What happened? What did you do with the car? I mean, I made him feel better. Now excuse me. I'm going to go study the chapter on emerging pelvises. You will kick her. You know, the truth is that my neck really feels better. You may wonder what you are writing. They are beautiful. I mean, I'm writing song ideas. They really are great song ideas. I can get them anywhere, even here, yes, right here. commissary you must be in songs about food, you know songs like I want to hold your ham, another bites the rind, no, if I could kill you first.

I'm serious guys, what do you see most, what's on the menu, well, we have swordfish eggs. and coffee, just maple pancakes to see it and change it, yeah I could write a song about it here, oh I really can't. I just need a better set. Oh, and the nicest second chance, but sometimes there are different thoughts, I wonder, it makes a lunchbox, you know? Okay, so you made a breakfast menu song, but I bet you five dollars you can't do it again. I'll take that bet, Seymour, yeah, what's for dessert? Raspberry sorbet and you find it at a thrift store.

I don't think it's your good money stay tuned Muppets tonight we'll be right back Sal you're good thanks I think I think you forgot my left foot there nice forearm hatching time okay yeah you think thanks Sal that's the Better 50 cents I spent Danny you gotta kiss a bust give me a little push Oh hey hey so what's going on here? You have an iron in these pants. Uh oh, sorry, general, you know I'm up to here. No, that would be it. your collarbone Juan II I don't care what you are you're becoming a pain in the spine stalker okay okay look that's it no no Johnny this is listen to me you're a gentlemen's monkey mm-hmm and your job is to satisfy my needs and right now I need to get my pay siren right Johnny I'm sorry I guess I was just trying to be something I'm not yeah well that's right you you're not a bone specialist you're a pantser irony like that it's the pants are right Johnny I'm a pants irony that's how it is that's okay yes special delivery to sell Manila oh thanks you're welcome oh thank you very much thank you very much it's my dad acupuncture and embroidery book oh my the headache is gone but the chitin is killing me hello I'm a cow and bubbles come out of my head thanks hey everything nerf look the program is ten times bigger yeah what a shame it's 1/10 it's funny hey let's see what else is on hand, that remote control, wait a minute guys, my name has a very spiritual meaning, okay, so what do you want to do?

I just want to go out on stage, sit at the piano, do a nice little simple number with the help of a few angels and to turn you hard into a story of pure delight some loving adulation often better no one better sacrifice she gave her reach than Some don't move on They waited like an arrow moving She didn't hit me in June Look at the shooter She hit Peters, that's it, um, yeah, you made me feel warm and sticky inside like a nice breeze, Say, are you hungry? , yeah, yeah, can we make another sweet, tender song like that?

I have a better idea, right? overalls done right now ruined my pants here you know what now okay Bobo this is the last one you ready Happy uchi well that means it's working no I think it means you strung some fleas how long does it take you know take these Take these off things, take out what you want, get your needles, that book won't arrive until next week, so, great, this is my first day, although I don't know who you are. I agree with everything. Can you speed that up in editing? What's your back? I promise nothing like this will happen again