No Creo en Ninguna Religión | Ibrahim Salem | Stand Up | Comedy Central México

well hello hello and Pedro has three apples and Juanito has stolen what color Juanito is but black black black black questions like this I ask myself all day no I'm I think faggots all day right I can't with Roman numerals does anyone know numbers Romans here who can help me there is a number that is appearing everywhere I don't know how much the boss is and can someone help me pass I get to Me

xico

so I entered the hotel and the bellboy greeted me it's someone it's the bellboy it's a person who has many buttons and they call her buttons because she has a lot of buttons, I don't think it's the stupidest thing in the milky way, they really call someone a button because she has a lot of buttons, I mean, I don't go to them and say hello, diseases because they have a lot of girlfriends. within my students yanira and I don't even get the cough right and that's it but well good evening nice to meet you I am

ibrahim

I come from Colombia but I was born in Palestine the country strip gaza war boom and there it is me and well my name is

ibrahim

salem

saharan jalil es I'm really not an Arab prostitute or anything, it's all my name and I discovered that Ibrahim Salem is a name that is not designed to be found on Google because Google has that option of maybe he meant correct one I'm going to nuclear Ibrahim and when I go on Google maybe he meant Iberia Iberian ibuprofen don't delete delete delete delete I put pound maybe he meant pound vibrates fiber don't delete delete delete delete I put my middle name they come out maybe he meant they come out they run they enjoy they mate they get pregnant they abort they cry do not delete delete delete delete a friend of mine way you will not find him write my name I put sandra rodríguez and google maybe he meant ibrahim

salem

be orange the pen has haunted me all my life of truths and applause so important if you don't want to applaud I applaud him I don't want to, I'm 20 years old, it doesn't seem like I don't look like I'm 28 but it's true I'm 20, I suffer from the curious case of Benjamin Button' but not to talk about that, come and tell me later that I'm 190 and I'm afraid of heights, no, it's stupid, it's true.

How to be black and be afraid of the dark I'm not a Muslim I want you to be clear I don't profess any

religi

on I'm afraid of

religi

ons because I remember that a while ago I read that rabbis circumcise Jewish children with their mouths I don't know If that's true or not, but if they do it, son of society, how are they going to do circumcision with the mouth or not? In other words, if they make me choose, I prefer Catholicism. The truth is, they're not going to take it from me with their mouth. More professionals are going to suck me, that's not the case.

It was sincere because you are a culé and I don't have to find the Jews. The truth is, they make me curious. The things that happen to them are strange. What I did recently was a few years ago, exactly the first Jewish minister named died. ariel sharon, I don't know if you saw the news, but it created a huge mystery for me, that is, how a Jewish father names his Jewish son Ariel, knowing that Hitler towards the Jews, soap, or, well, what happens to him today, does someone tell me? Can you say who is going to marry Ariel, no one, not the Rosita, suddenly another important character that the Jews have is Anne Frank, not a girl who died in the concentration camps that everyone and poor Franco, poor roe, that is, write a book. and he didn't have to go on tour to promote it, poor thing, I played myself to make them laugh with my real faggots and all this but it started with my dad, not me, well, more like Palestine, but my dad was the one who said that suit can't be born in Palestine, it's a very dangerous country and old Mary Decker takes me to Colombia from a virgin island or to Guyana, Colombia, sir, but hey, I am here thanks to him, not to Mr.

Sam Salem, Saharan, Musa is not my dad's name, she is not an Arab or anything like that. style is called sam salem sáhara moza and that name I remember caused a sensation when delivering grades because the teacher said the father's name then the student's name and gave him the grades as Andrés González, father of Camilo González and Claras Mariana Gutiérrez, mother of daniel gonzález and classical sams salem sahara musa and all the dads ibrahim salem saharan jalil's dad of course he passes the hallways and all the dads so he hasn't failed anything if he's fat and he fails something and we fly the way my dad always got angry When I approved of religion I under

stand

it but well that's how he is I don't have to love him because he is an Arab dad who was hit here with a strap for example a strap Latin dad good cable of the iron please cable good nettle in the eyes please those of nettles eyes well passed level 1 me cocoa and my dad was like brahimi you run the minefield bad ass and you don't know what it's like to dodge mines wearing 12 and a half generations but well I love him a lot no he's a great guy and Nobody takes the trouble to talk to him.

I love talking to him because he can't pronounce the letter p. The letter p, which is such an important letter for people who speak Spanish, my old man doesn't master it. He replaces it with be like a donkey he can't be the dog he says the dog the pants the bad husband he salchipapas give me peaks it's impossible and he makes jokes with that and it makes me feel good and it makes me angry that he does that because he's already grown up he sees me doing chores and I Brian says and I'm a dad. Did you read Alibaba and I'm a dad and mom?

She matures. The man has gray hair in his testicles. What happened to him? Ibrahim the paper tower. What paper was it made with? He took the bond and someone shut him up. For God's sake, Ibrahim went. to take out the pizza and they denied it, it was stupid mushrooms if a hand from Marc and every time I say no more please and that thing about pm has made me ask myself something because I think I will never find the answer to that question. My name is Ibrahim Ibrahim and my dad could never pronounce it, no, but seeing that yellow tomb and I remember that one day we had a pretty big problem with my dad and he had taken out some very important documents.

I keep them. I knew where I kept them and I hid them from him and It was very fun to see him all over the house brian witte my vaginas with my whales me dad my mom I haven't seen him all day really my daisy vaginas cost me 200 pesos each page I made him see the one in which he was old filthy and I think he did have a lot of fun with those because my dad has 14 children, not 14 children, that is, he gave me 13 half-brothers, it's true, my mother only gave me one, no, that says a lot about everyone, I have fourteen half-brothers, that is to say that in In total, I have seven full brothers, not because I learned mathematics at school thanks to my mother, who is her name, well, no one, I don't think it's cool that her name is already that, because not only do they bully me, but there too, so I don't feel alone in this, my friends. friends go to the house my mother gives them dinner she gives them juice she gives them because it is and they are cool what's your mother's name I want to say goodbye now like no one who hasn't see you later ma'am and people treat her like a different woman because she wears turban but she is not a different woman, she is more Latin American than Arab I discovered it because that's what any mother does, she calls me to tell me faggots that no one cares about raisins and she is going to take a super important exam that the university had and she calls me now emotionally It's okay and I yes it's okay I swear I do by God I swear which God we are now the I by Allah you have happened lady what happened tell me that a motorcycle crashed in front of the house well be careful but I mean if I don't have a vote then I worked hard and I bought the motorcycle, I no longer have it and I want to sell it because I put on the helmet and I discovered that I am claustrophobic and I love her very much.

She is a great woman. With my mother, we have to be honest and with all mothers, my mother. crying, last time he grabbed my hands and told me, Ibrahim, what are you going to do when I die and I wiped away my tears and I responded to bury it and rent the room and the husband came and hit me because I treated my mother badly but well he He does not have the right to hit less and more because of his name, his name is Ofelio, that is, sir, what is his name, happy, my mother has eggs, the others downloaded many of the lady, your name is Nacha, my name is Ibrahim Estevez, Ofelio, Ofelio, mature and fornicate on and Well, they have my half-brother who is five years old and is half country and half Arab.

I don't know if he is going to be a thief or a miser, but nevertheless I keep him locked the door. half-Arab imagine where a child would have been in half-country or half-Arab, they operate on mushrooms like Colombian ones and wrap them in a cloth like serious ones, all bushy, they subscribe subscribe subscribe subscribe subscribe to the

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