Jon Richardson Call Out Audience Member! | Old Man Live | Universal Comedy

the applause from people who have had this in store for seven months. Sometimes you get so excited that I end up feeling like I have to worry about you on a sort of physical medical level. Sometimes you tweet me to say, "Oh, I have John." Richardson's entries why haven't I peed already? Isn't that right, Catherine, where is Katherine Glenn, she's here somewhere, where is she, up there, up there, there you are, Catherine, hi, how are you, you didn't think I'd read it? Did you think I hadn't read it? You probably didn't think I'd re

member

it for months.

Did you keep it in my head? Are you OK? Have you had a good day? Yes, you are sure because you got hurt this morning. Didn't you get some noodle juice in your eye? Read. I should probably point it out at this point. If you send me a message, I click on your page and read everything you've written. I can't help it. I help myself I'm bored you have noodle liquor in your eye I mean you're not eating them well Catherine not that, are you okay? So yes, yes, it was beef and chili, right? Yes, beef chili used to be. chicken and mushrooms, right?

It used to be chicken and mushrooms and then she had a beef chili one and said well that's it. I'm not going to come back. I'll also check your page, don't worry about that. I look, I look throughout your life, you were chicken and mushrooms, you were until June 23rd and then it was all beef and chili after that it was all beef and chili? Are you with Joe tonight? Yes, that's her boyfriend Joe. I will find your loved ones I will find your loved ones Joe sent me a little message Are you okay Joe? How do you feel about your girlfriend sending messages like that to men in their 30s?

Do you know the hashtag she used? Yes, awesome hashtag. Fanny fluts have you never heard anything like that have you never heard anything like that? The problem is true. I'm going to stop there so you can relax and enjoy the rest of the evening. The problem with this is that then you feel I like it because I L T and I like you and I wish you all the best for the next anniversary April 23 um it's like that it's not like that no no 16 16 I confuse it with your birthday because it's the 29th it's like that um I can't Help me you end up liking me because I know Joe wants to be a wildlife photographer and tweets a lot of wildlife videos.

I support you. I hope it comes true because it is a dream worth living, it is a wonderful job and I know many. You walk in, I know there's a woman named Annie Ear who's with her husband and it's her 20th wedding anniversary and this is her gift and that's not good enough, man, that's not good enough, 20 years is platinum, no tedium, get us something nice, someone tweeted me about a A week ago I said, Oh, I'm so excited to see John Richards and today I clicked on his page to see how excited I was that day.

Do you know what he tweeted today? I can't wait to see Dave Gorman in October. Awesome, so then go to the concerts and it's not like you're supposed to be a parade of blank faces but you're not your friends and I'll start to worry about you and it may go in another direction, you can message me, in the end it won't I like you. I look at your page and I think, oh, tonight a lot of men are going to tweet me like, oh, we're going to go see you tonight, you better not be like that's me normally.

I think well, tonight is full, I better pull. something out of the bag that I actually had and then sometimes because you can send me a message, you just waste my time, just send me this garbage. I'm driving to a gig in Newcastle. I'll stop for gas around 1:00. I'll check Twitter at the store, not at the pump. I'm not dangerous, I don't want to be scolded with that big microphone. They have bomb seven. I'm sorry, Jesus. I check my Twitter. I will receive a message from someone like you. to the concert that night and then they'll send me a little message saying okay, I'm looking forward to G until the concert later, what time does it start?

Only that for me, not for The Venue, not for his partner, he with him is simply sitting at his desk. I'm going to go to that concert, I know what time it starts, what I'm going to do about it. Well, I could Google it since I'm on my computer anyway, but that seems like a lot of work for me, so no, I'll just ask. I'm sure you're no better at doing it on Coast Day than Coral, your

audience

, one by one, telling us Coast times and where we can park nearby and where it's good for local Mexican food, that sort of thing. unless you think not.

I don't have to answer to myself, the man of the world who pays his damn mortgage. I've added a lot of details there to be honest, but I look at it and think no. I have better things to do and then I'll go back in. I keep driving my car, but then, when I saw the little photo of him, I start to feel sorry for him, it's him and his friends who are with the little hats on and I could have told him that he was as fast as I didn't. I could have gone at 8:00, he had gone at 8:00 like every concert I've been to, there's a quinky d just wants to start a conversation right?

I think maybe all the other comics are responding to people, maybe. That's why this relationship exists because John Bishop would just take the time to say oh, it starts at 8:00 B. John Bishop, don't say you weren't warned. I think I'm starting to feel bad. I think you know what it is. grown man, he can take care of himself, he can find out how the concert is going. The problem with Twitter is that all kinds of different people come to Comedy and some of you care a little more, so sometimes I'll be at the hotel afterwards to check it out.

On my Twitter I will receive a message from a teenager, right? And you can tell when you get a message from a teenager because her Twitter handle is never just a name, it's never like @Sarah Turner or something, it's all the colors and sparkles. in it it'll be like in Izzy wizzy and then a galloping unicorn and a beating love heart and a cupcake with a candle in it and it's all like why should I just tell you my name? There is much more about me. I love unicorns and cupcakes and candles and love the moment I say that I think, oh, don't come see me, you have so much love and hope in your heart, I'm not your guy, go see one of the other comedians , you will have a great time.

Don't come and sit for two hours. I was going to grab a plate. I decided to smash my head against the wall. It's not for that. I don't want to ruin your dreams, but you know they enjoy the work you get. a message later all in capital letters like oh amazing concert cheers for coming to Scarra Rule Mau GIF of a leprechaun eating a tobleron for no reason moving pictures is better and I mean just waiting for my dad to come pick us up LOL right and I read that in the hotel. I guess I'm wondering if his dad came to pick him up because then I won't hear from him again, right, and that goes for all of you, none of you Pricks tweet me when he gets home.

Like I'm not too worried about eating every single one of you, you disappear with these cryptic tweets like oh, cheers to the gig, I'm just going to have a few beers, I'm walking back down the canal, I think he's dead, I lost another one. , I need to be careful with my

audience

, I have to hold on to it, that opening scene is a fluke, when they leave, I'm just going to throw the fuses in that puddle in the basement. I start checking your page to see your tweet again and you're gone. tweeting I think what happened what happened I think what if these girls Dad forgot to pick them up, you know, what if his mom dropped them off and he picked them up and she just forgot he came in?

She came, what are you doing here? I just got home from work, she said you're supposed to pick up Ezy Wizzy Unicorn Cupcake Love Heart from that concert and he says what concert, she says, that little gay staring, how many times do I have to tell you? He says, he says, well, me. Now I know exactly who you mean, love. Yeah, I couldn't place him by name, but that's such a vivid description of his work that she's like, "oh, damn." I was in the pub after work and I can't tell him because I told him so.

I've been working late and I've been thinking about it for years I'll probably be fine, he says oh go find some love, so he starts driving under the influence, now he's dead and in a ditch somewhere place crushed against a tree. fixed on her, would he tell her about a tree? I love you, you want to take a taxi, so she's still outside the place, isn't she freezing? Scarra waterfront theater in mid-December. Oh, she'll be here in a minute. Oh, he'll be here in One minute and then I think, what if a Transit van shows up and starts driving?

Sometimes it comes in the factory truck, sometimes it comes back to the factory truck, they get in the back of this truck, and then they wake up two weeks later in the middle of the East. Europe surrounded by, as we know, the least entertaining rapist on the planet for a long time