Jeanne Robertson "Don't send a man to the grocery store!"

What happened in our area of ​​the country? As you know, when someone we know gets sick or dies, that's how we do it, have you noticed if we hear the word pass, we, us, and then we move on? He was sitting next to a woman. On the plane not a month or two ago she was 70 years old and she went to see her sister. I had never met her and I told her how many siblings you have. Saidi has two sisters and then we had a third. She died. 1941 and we both said oh, I'm so sorry, you know what I think it is.

I think it's just a small show of respect to stop for a minute and do this and do it well in our area of ​​the country when someone gets sick, we know, or they've passed away, we take care of the food, have you noticed, we take care of it? charge for the food, you can buy that food, you can go to the deli and the supermarket, get something great, hire someone to bake it, but leave it on the big list of important things in life you get a lot more credit if you make it yourself you can put it on your grandmother's plate but the women in the kitchen will say I know where she got that chicken from I tell you that's how it works and I only make one thing and it's little seven pound biscuits.

I make them by the dozen. I'm out of town. Something happens. The left brain takes over and not long ago I woke up one morning and heard that a friend of ours was. I got sick and went to my freezer and my biscuits were sold out. I didn't realize he was out. He said he had been taking them to a lot of people. Many people were sick. I said, well, I didn't know they were gone. I have to make a cake before I leave town, honey, go to the supermarket and buy my ingredients, he said, I'm trying to get to the bottom of it.

Mitten, I said, well, it's just a few ingredients, he said, I'll tell you what I can get there. and I got it and I still got sick Mitten, but make sure he can get through that fast lane, no problem, we don't go to the

grocery

store

together anymore because, frankly, I don't care what things cost for a half ounce, so I made the list up and he left, well, we all waited, I waited, he didn't come back, I thought he had gone to bad Mitten and I didn't think where he could be. I was getting ready to call the supermarket and I heard the car.

He came in, walked up the stairs huffing, he had two bags and more bags hanging from his arms, he just stared at me, started putting things down and said, I'll get more out of the car. I looked in the first bag which was a pound of margarine and two giant bottles of vanilla flavoring making half a teaspoon of time it would take forever to get rid of these two giant bottles of vanilla flavoring and in the next bag with three dozen eggs I said that They had a special, I'll tell you, they had a special, I didn't need more than five eggs and I just said that a dozen in the new bag was a great thing, shorten two of them and in the next bag two more than 12 pounds of lard we could fry fish for everyone. here, but in that fourth capture I found my list and I would like to get out of the kitchen for just a minute to tell you something.

The left side of the brain is a smart man. He went to Duke University on a basketball scholarship, played basketball for four years and graduated in the same four years, then went to Carolina and earned a master's degree and a Ph.D. He overgraduated himself, but I don't care how many pieces of paper you frame and put on the wall, if you're left-brained, everything's fine. to attack you and it took effect on him in the third aisle of that

grocery

store

. I backed into the kitchen, found my list, and in my eagerness to make sure he could pass the express ring for probably the first time.

Once in my life I numbered the items number one a pound of butter no problem number two a big bottle of vanilla flavor and I had two of them number three a dozen eggs this man has a doctorate number four a big tub thing of butter pig I could hear him coming back I looked at number five, he said a 5B bag of sugar. I knew he came with 25 pounds of sugar and number six was a 5 pound bag of all-purpose flour. 30 Pounds of Flour Now I believe in accepting things I can't change but I also believe in bullying things at some point and then at some point I let it go and this time everyone would have been proud of me.

I let it go. I put that list behind my back. He came in again throwing sugar and flour everywhere Bam Bam Bam Bam he puts it down there and says one more trip I went back to my list and looked and number seven was a bottle of seven up I don't want that big bottle because if you're going to do a cake and you just use it, it will be stale when you come back. I told him I wanted a six-pack of those medium-sized ones, so I knew he'd come back with 42 seven-up bottles and within a minute he was there.

It was that I had just taken a spice from him right here, back up, pull everyone down and he turned to me before he left and said, well, obviously they didn't let me through the express line, but you know what he got to the end. in the hallway and I came back and she said for the record, I realized what I had done, but by then she was calling the seven and all these people behind me in line were laughing and I had to get to the bad glove , do not do it. Tell someone I said I won't three days later I went to the supermarket and a woman who was looking at me says I think I checked on your husband a few days ago I said I'm sure you could have said that. an interesting order, I said, let me explain and she was also from this area and this proves it because I said that every time a friend of ours gets sick or dies and we both went, I said: I make biscuits and we take care of it.

This woman told me there is an epidemic