How to Magically Connect with Anyone | Brian Miller | TEDxManchesterHighSchool

People because we feel it will be rude or they don't want to answer in some way, but we underestimate people's willingness to answer our questions. Before doing the trick, I asked Ed, "Have you always been blind?" He said yes, this was very important information for me. The person who couldn't see with his life. You will have a different perspective than someone who once had their sight and then lost it as a result of an accident or illness. With ED, I can't even use visual language. By asking questions, I can change the tone of my voice, my behavior, and even my language.

So that you feel that I understand you and we can establish communication. Now, if you are going to learn this, it is not only important that you ask the questions but that you listen to the answers, that you listen to understand. Don't listen to the answer just for the sake of answering, I told you that before. Here were my mistakes in life, I guess. You've heard this before, and we're all guilty of this from time to time. We often just listen to people with the intention of saying something clever as soon as their lips stop moving so we can quickly interrupt them and say it.

We attend. We've all done this, we're all guilty, but I was doing it in a very bad way and I think it damaged my relationships. Have you ever asked someone what their name was and then immediately forgotten? Do you know why we forget people's names? Because as they say his name, we think about how we are going to say our name: first name, last name, Mr. Miller Bryan. We don't listen, we just live on our side of the conversation. . Then you can start by learning this technique: Ask and listen to understand the answer. When you do that, I think you'll find that you can build better and deeper meaningful relationships with people, both personally and professionally.

You have radically changed my life and I truly believe it will change yours too, Ed. How did Ed, a blind man, see the leaves? The answer, like most great hoaxes, was very simple. I sat in front of him, while under the table, I gently placed my feet on top of his. And then I gave him these instructions: "If you think the paper is red," and I tapped his foot once, "then you say red." "And if you think it's black," he tapped his foot twice, "then it says black." I taught Ed the secret of our communication system, where he would tell him the color of the paper by pressing my foot, once for red and twice for black.

Then I repeated the instructions: "If you think the paper is red, say red." "If you think the paper is black, say black." Then I gently took his hands and asked, "Do you understand me?" He smiled and said, "Yes, I understand." Then I knew there was a

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ion between us. When we were done, I taught his wife how to do it, like I'm teaching you now, so they could do the trick in front of friends and family. (Ed) was so excited that he couldn't wait to see his grandchildren on vacation so he could, quote, "drive them completely crazy." (Laughter) Now you see, magic is not based on technical skills, tricks or secrets. !

Magic is based on

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ion. Life is based on connection. Communication is based on adopting other points of view. You see, our world is a shared experience, fragmented into individual perspectives. Imagine if we could all feel like someone understands us, thank you. (applause)