Everything Wrong With Independence Day Resurgence

mom logo overload when she thinks this trip through CGI space will get me excited about interstellar travel when in fact all my future astronaut sperm tragically died of disinterest, it's remarkable to see the president with more speech because this future technology alien knows it was We didn't film him well sitting on the bed after a nightmare cliché, okay, let's unpack this super expository nightstand. First, he's reading about the German air force and he also has a cane, so he's clearly old and lame. Now, thirdly, we have the repeated scribblings of a circle and his radio fancy pen fancy watch dell remote control and a phone with more buttons than the Starship Enterprise I guess we're supposed to deduce that this former president is still haunted and tormented by visions of a circle with a line, but What worries me most is that the Dell remote is upside down, so you have to strain to see the logo, which you think would make Dell less likely to pay for this placement and, however, here it is disconcerting.

I didn't even know Dell. made remote control devices for 20 years the world will see no armed conflict nations have put aside their petty differences these Jumbotron screens are floating Will Smith has better things to do on the scene you're the one trapped in the White House it's It's a shame Mae Whitman died and couldn't repeat her role as Oh, she's still alive and still actively working in Hollywood. Wow, how awkward that Liam Hemsworth is in the moon rover, which could explain the break he and Miley took in real life, although you could also easily blame that pink armpit hair phase he went through around the time of the events of this film.

I mean the filming. I was the best student in the history of the Academy. I'm exposing Austin in case you confuse it with one of Jupiter's moons. Rather, there are only 36 women. This moon base, well that number is worthless unless or until you tell me how many men there are, but the movie doesn't care about that, it just wants to slide around and I've been away a long time and I'm the one making the joke. You're expected to believe that this little ship will keep this big thing from falling, and commanded by an inferior Hemsworth, no less engines are overheating, but the movie, despite personally giving us that information, will ignore the consequences.

You are grounded until later. Notice what you mean is that you are grounded until the aliens attack again and we need an innovative thinker like you, bring me Director Levinson, you mean that guy who made dinner, you think he would make this better. I am totally in favor. He is an original sign despite having mastered alien technology for the past 20 years. Cell service remains spotty. You really need me. I've been chasing you around the planet for three weeks. Sorry, who are you? Did this guy just start yelling? David right now halfway to his destination without David even knowing who he is or why he is here.

I mean this movie, how holy did they drag him as a maniac into this movie. Doesn't she look more uncomfortable in this than the Antichrist? that film involved a scene in which scissors were used in a way that violated its Terms of Use. Oh, look at the same basic circle with a linear squiggle that the former president has been drawing a lot. I bet that means something despite the simplicity of the doodles. It's people for a war with aliens for ten years a premise is much better than this whole movie, but of course, let's film this one instead, it happened by itself two days ago and now we have Winnie who starts the movie, the ship turned on their own lights.

The call comes from inside the house of course your wrath is the only ship that landed on 96 bulls in total of course the first movie made it look like every ship crashed and burned after they destroyed the ship nurse, but surely this one did it. it landed on its own and no one said about it that they were drilling I don't know case closed so I guess visa we don't know so it must be impossible to break it 20 years ago and we destroyed the mother ship we detected an explosion an X-band frequency directed towards space deep.

Funny how we're only now hearing about Del paying good money to have his laptops slammed shut in frustration and a remote control shot backwards at the late night seal. You are a pilot. one pilot the other is a pilot I'm giving wings to the international legacy squadron plus this movie went a lot stealthier than I think Captain Hillier intended considering he died during a test flight how do you feel taking off to the moon man? The reporter is the worst and the writers decided that Will Smith's character died during a test flight instead of dating a stripper.

China has been an integral part of the Earth's space defense program. It's amazing how useful China and all the movies released in the last few years suddenly became. took the later career path from exotic dancer to respected doctor in recent years and also, of course, she's a doctor because we're in an Emmerich movie, so they're sending an elite squadron of eight pilots to the moon and they're supposed to That's what I'm a guy, I like pretty girls, but even I'm not comfortable with how sexualized this girl's deep lane ritual is. This is the very definition of the male gaze for a sexy pilot to suddenly overcome the need to excrete pheromones while he's standing inside. a jet um can't they just not be related why is everyone someone something in this movie milk and the last thing I said was my parents were.

I hated you ladies and gentlemen roland emmerich indulging the cheapest human emotions in the most sordid of ways once again please applaud jake decides to watch the training video where he almost killed dylan possibly realizing that an invisible audience needs a story of brackish bottom makes up for the loss of the coma after

everything

alien related in this movie woke up from the coma two days ago this just arrived Hubble still uses Hubble after mastering all that alien technology huh I didn't want to give the telescope a chance James Webb, sure it's not an operation yet, but this is a movie, damn it, raise the alert level to red alert to red alert, then I.

I'm calling you Star Trek, listen, I want you to pack your things and go to your sisters. This guy just received evidence that there may be an alien attack and he's the commander of the moon base and his first move is to selfishly call his own wife before. Notify any type of government and also how a lunar base detects the Saturn oddity before Earth. It's not much further away that it's considerably closer to Saturn. I feel like this whole moon base is too James Bond II and stupid. I know we're not on good terms with aliens, but that's racist, how did you suffer so much from their language?

How did you determine that he figured out anything with a second's glance at this Wingdings board? You must be the pilot that China sent, that's your first line, besides being pathetic and obvious, it's also a little racist. I was wondering if you guys wanted to have a drink, maybe fall in love. I think the sync counter just died from that pickup line. We may need to count the sins manually with an abacus after this, take them outside commander. the peace sphere that just flew to our moon to warn us about the aliens decided to do so without trying to communicate with us first or send images of Hitler simply flew into our airspace and hoped for the best, so sudden, the alien ship with hole worm stinks moon dust and everyone wants to photograph it except Goldblum and in this case I have to be on everyone's side except golden blue shoot that bat out of the sky now I don't care that the movie goes on to show that Goldblum probably made the right use Logic Damn it, they're coming back and this time we won't be able to stop it.

This isn't Bill Pullman playing the president from the last movie who went crazy. This is Bill Pullman the actor talking about Emmerich and his production team. I will avenge. brother, I guess your brother died during the invasion from the first movie, but it's much more interesting to think that that cheetah killed your brother and that's why you killed him and stuffed him because any other explanation for that, the cheetah makes you 100%. I cannot support your information. Well, how do you think you're going to hear John Oliver's discount? Clearly he's going to space with that spaceship over there and your question is unnecessary or at least

wrong

.

Why is everyone else on Georgia's Floyd amazing? This character is so funny with the constant screaming. exasperated, I'm glad David decided to let him go on this trip on Independence Day. I'd like to remind you how much David hates flying and how much 2016 Jeff Goldblum hates acting. In fact, I'm glad no one is buying this guy's book. He puts him in his place. you're the guy's dad, not the guy, you should have written a book about being the guy's dad, but no, you wrote this and now you're suffering that a former president with all the Secret Service details has escaped using the fake body method on the bed because Of course yes, that is the place of the accident.

Thanks David to all these people, but where is the humanity in this shot? The current president, every alien invasion movie these days makes it seem like the Moon is always in some fixed positions that the aliens can visit just before reaching Earth. Ships over 3,000 miles in Guyana, that seems excessive. I like a space computer that repeats

everything

you say. It's useful in case anyone missed the first broadcast. It's like that, yes, yes, an entertaining and useful sci-fi movie that replaces the original films with historical destruction scenes with moon-based destruction scenes and I'm sorry, but if I'm honest, I'm sorry, it doesn't have the impact.

I don't really care for the moment when a guy with headphones can't hear or feel the destruction around him, cliché, it's an Emmerich staple. This guy is actually surprised at how familiar this all is. Man of Steel, what can this ship be like with two main characters? being so close to mass destruction without being affected by it wait, nevermind, I think I answered my own question, what goes up must come down, while I admit that Jeff Goldblum is good at saying cheesy action lines like this, what is he talking about ? there is an alien ship that landed on Earth and it never came down but just descended to Earth so what the lazy screenwriter many months before the Brexit vote London gets good and hard something tells me this is only slightly more impossible than John Cusack's miraculous journey in 2012.

The scene could also be accidentally cut in 2012, but you wouldn't know the difference. I'd like to get the reference points even when the movie is self-aware it somehow ends up being

wrong

. This is clearly incidental damage to the other three. Come on, but let's laugh at how aliens are iconic racists, have your way, yeah, me too, the five screenwriters of this movie collectively high-fived the pee pants joke because it was righteous in its originality and humor. You better come and see this. You better come and see this, okay, here's Judd Hirsch, the author's character failed to cook a steak on a ship named after a Madonna song in the Atlantic, just in time to be in the center of the action because we all loved him so much in the first movie. it's sure to make us forget Will Smith turned down this shower of shit you take the initiative I have to take care of someone because that's how the army works Dylan flies back to the hospital just in time to witness what a failure he is, he's saving his mother and she's dead.

So the question is: Did Vivica Fox ask for too much money? Did the writers just get out of the characters' motivations? 101. Does Roland Emmerich hate strippers who become doctors? Yes, Judd Hirsch is basically Jesus on this ship. I'm no longer even remotely worried about his chances of survival he's untouchable fortunately for the brackish he decided to escape his room just as President Widmore arrived to open the alien prison the other all systems the depressed and deranged former president annulled his modern security system this movie is aggressively stupid well now apparently the pronoun game extends throughout the universe.

I feel like this is kind of a metaphor where analog kills digital. This is an independent state, so you probably won't shut up. Okay, that's enough. I feel like this movie almost certainly already showed me these underage driving melodramatic teenagers. and yet I still feel like it's the first time I've seen them and I hate them. I think they are after our molten core, yes, but maybe they are trying to save humanity and make itthe earth spins again like in the classic 2003 movie. core also i guess there are no other good sources of heat and nearby solar systems like the sun and totally after the melted core you did it buddy it's interesting that i'm looking at a photo family in which the child in the photo is not him and will be Smith. getting a 10 million dollar photo appearance fee for this movie couldn't save it too late I wasn't brazen enough this red mass on top of the ship that's your target it's exactly the same but it doesn't look anything like the Star of Death weakness: We're sending a fleet of drones to go ahead of you and disable their shields makes you think you have the technology to disable their shields on the 4th of July, wait, those aliens waited 20 years and then attacked Earth in the same calendar days before. stupid aliens Jesus she's happy because she's one of those pilots before they all took off and now that thing is gone after a few so now this plasma drill will take forever to cut to the core of the Earth even though that it clearly doesn't have any of the earthly limitations I had when I tried to shovel my way through it and we've only now seen how any ship avoids getting hit by these things seriously, there's so much junk on this screen it's like playing that old game of Genesis, aim for the land that was impossible unless you entered a cheat code and loaded the cartridge into a toaster.

Liam Hemsworth and Will Smith's son collaborate to take out a single alien ship and everyone leaves them alone to do it even though there are ten times as many alien ships in this airspace while Earth sends any cool movie moment watch it, to hell with Everyone, they should be dead is what I'm saying. I think we need to fly inside to be even more like Star Wars, sir, she knows she's coming, yes, because she looked out the front window. If you're going to give this guy a connection to aliens, can you at least have him spit out something that's not too obvious?

It is a trap. A trap. Why would you fly these pilots here just to disable their planes? Do they need live humans? for some reason I don't think they do, which makes this a pretty pointless trap scene, well there goes HBO again, she provoked us, yes she attacked you and you fight back, but she was ready for it, It's a normal Bobby Fischer, the aliens are attacking. the space and the doors are being forced open and yet no one has attempted to take madam president anywhere safe, she is basically closer to the doors than anyone else in the room, even everyone on the line of presidential succession are presumed dead and buried.

I swear. Sir, well, isn't it just as convenient for all members of the presidential line of succession? Fortunately, this character is being played by William Fichtner. Have a little faith. He wants to talk about faith. Scoping out Joey King and Judd Hirsch for using colloquialisms during an alien invasion is not. not even close to my list of things I want to see because I'm NOT going to ride ever, thank God, why is it that the two right lanes are so jammed, people are out of their vehicles, this left lane is so wide open? I live in America, damn it, and I know for a fact that this third lane would also be backed up and there would be ten makeshift lanes in the fields on either side.

It would also be supported. This planet has been unified in a way that John, precedent in a human history film, believes Bill Pullman is going to give is another moving moment in the speech, but he realizes that Bill Pullman will only be allowed to have one of those in their life. The guy is giving a motivational speech to a guy, but others notice and start coming closer to hear the rest. It's a cliché to me. our line, look if you're going to bring alien vs. predator into this, we've lowered the bar to the point where we're not even jumping high anymore, we're curving, this is where the movie had a great opportunity to be awesome alien.

Sci-fi movie that shows American pilots fighting in the alien ecosystem that is entirely on this huge ship, but instead the movie completely overlooks that this is something they need to get away from instead of bathing in. How long can earthlings hold their breath underwater in an alien? Damn, Space God, I'm not even going to finish that sentence, movie, can Daryl lick my balls too? Goblet of Fire from Independence Day, this idiot touches an alien sphere without anyone seeing it before it's too late and it turns out that's what opens this reservation. speeder, I mean, damn, my species was stripped of our biological existence for a virtual one thousands of years ago, so your species is a bunch of Lucy's, so I came to evacuate as many of you as possible, but instead of just speak to them in English right away and give them You have this amazing warning.

I needed to show up at your moon base like an idiot and get shot first. It is a molten core. They use them to refuel their ships and grow their technology. Don't ask how they do that with a core that is. mainly iron-nickel alloy, it's scary and super cool, the system has the key to superior technology, that's why you lost, right? I mean, they beat you up, you said you're the only survivor, why would I believe that your technology is superior and there's a hidden planet where I teach refugees from other fallen worlds how to build weapons that will defeat them, so there's a hidden planet that somehow magically appears to the refugees when they flee their planet and once they land on said planet they are told to go find a she-knows-what sphere. what to do next I mean there are many questions that will be answered by this movie because it thinks it will have another sequel, but now that I am activated, the Queen will detect my signature and hunt me down, maybe you should have sent an instruction manual first before.

Coming here, if we hide the real sphere inside the isolation chamber, the frequency of this sphere can be read from space, how much can an isolation chamber full of cold fusion bombs really do and attract it to the soft floors? Kuna ear movie, activate cold fusion bombs. You're going to kill everyone from here to Houston, not if we use this base's shield generators for containment. Series. Well, I checked it an hour ago, but this sounds suspiciously like we were both wrong. We don't have seven hours to Earth. central gap, we only have one, what a surprise, the professional estimators in a Roland Emmerich film were very wrong in their predictions and the danger is much more imminent.

I'll release it now, right? President Whitmore prepared for this recently. It's time to crush his daughter's dreams of being a hero. Julius finds a magical bus that the driver abandoned just as the van was about to run out of gas. Excuse me down here, here goes, this movie saw Guardians of the Galaxy loved Star-Lord, but I couldn't learn anything about the story or originality in the process, so we end up with this lightning bolt while Jake does this. Can I ask again what the point of this trap is? They basically let the ships in and everyone realized, oh no, it's a trap and that went off. like something really bad, to what end could they have just not caught these guys and taken them down outside easily?

The aliens didn't need anything from them, so this trap is totally useless, it's just that the technology hasn't changed at all. The interface sounds like it's a So, isn't it surprising that after the first movie the aliens didn't advocate locking technology for their ships or require a password or alien DNA or anything that would prevent humans from using a man? I just want you to know. I'll get out of here. This is a cliché, but I don't have the strength to write it all down. I just hope you feel me in this. These are radios. Okay, first of all, how do you know that the world's shortwave radio message board is still running during this super obvious alien invasion.

Secondly, why would you say this, even if it is true? Are you trying to tell aliens how to find your listeners or the language? I mean, I guess you'll win it. I don't speak English here otherwise good luck he collapsed yesterday, come with me quick, this dad is a Kurt and if you didn't realize that Bill Pullman was going to die in this movie, probably while sacrificing himself to save the planet, so you don't watch movies very. It's often good to see you fly again. Well, first of all say this instead of "Sorry for lying to you five minutes ago." It is placed in the air like you meet a terrible father, but the movie felt the need to recreate the flight of the sacrificial plane. in the alien ship scene from the first movie because Roland Emmerich only has two ideas at most and those two ideas maintain and produce inbred childish ideas that are somehow even worse if she said why the fighters even us, this girl would be great in theaters but terrible at screenwriting cliché there has to be a second hit duh yeah almighty aliens queens hold grudges like you and me someone's dogs in danger cliché feels like this alien should have easily reached the bus and destroy it now or already these ships that are trying to blow up the alien should have destroyed the bus now we are in six minutes, actually nine, but it is not possible to know the movie with the storage time that suits your needs, but a good watch narration, buddy, you can watch the movie.

How much do you expect me to swallow? I have a gag reflex. Know? Will these pilots ever realize they are shooting? Is working? Oh, what made the shield lose its maximum amount of hit points? Thank you. God, this video game has been boring and confusing, by the way, why is the alien queen so intent on destroying the school bus and Patricia not on a mission to find the sphere? Why does she care so much about these? This alien queen is so Motivated by flashes of anger, it's a wonder she ever got this far and our attempt to take over Earth.

How much you wanted Liam Hemsworth to save her ass like all the dollars she got. Alright, he just ruined my back. She leaves a second guitar in our system. This is where movies officially make you angry. They left the mothership 15 minutes ago, but the alien queen wanted to take control? So no, just let them fly, no problem. What happens when these ships were shooting at you a minute ago? No, just allow them time to save, not Mae Whitman, then control it, these guys don't have manual controls and the alien ships they stole, then turn on the fusion thrusters manually, look and wow balls, I have to get controls back, invent controls in Big Town, if this movie just steals from Independence Day and aliens while taking the name Close Encounters of the Third Kind in vain, a good joke, but your hands are on the wheel and these windshield wipers just turn on, like that which is a magical bull or has a child under the dashboard where we can't see that the windshield wipers just came on, which raises even more questions and none of these crashed alien ships landed on anything or anyone important.

At the end of the marriage, you try to shoot me. This joke is not funny. The worst thing is that it's actually kind of casually offensive. suggest that violence is common in marriages, but mostly it's not funny, yeah, let all the little kids at school get too close to the alien queen and her bodily fluids dripping, we think she's dead, but we don't we know for sure. Jesus, 10 years after this here in Brockovich take David and his father for all they are worth in a cruel but fair class action lawsuit on behalf of these children who developed Neptune's pneumonia.

You guys should stay with me for a while, but we'd really like to know what pink is. movie, this is some kind of prequel to Lovely Bones or something like that. I mean, some old guy walks up to four little kids and just adopts them on the spot with no checks or balances, why is the ship going flying? Sure they killed the Queen, but who owns it now? going back to space is something the sphere told us, I'm not sure I understand it, it wants us to lead its resistance, well you should have made a better movie then because that won't happen unless Fox wants to splash more money, we're still getting one of anyway oh I feel like you're court martialing me this is crazy hey I'm in Hawaii I can throw up on you B like in Furby like in Belize beautiful place just stay calm and don't get burned. this is not the time to panic this is the perfect time to panic Charlie look at those fields below there are fields endless fields full of cold fusion bombs and attract it to the southwest and put any action on this cold fusion Mambo Cambodia