Carol Burnett and Robin Williams -The Funeral

thank you very much thank you very much for coming thank you thank you very much for coming Susan we offer you my deepest condolences thank you it was Marcus Marcus yes thank you very much for coming well I will miss him yes it was a great loss oh well we are all going to miss him terribly yes you must feel terrible Well, I don't feel well, it was a terrible shock. Oh, death is always there, you're sitting at home doing nothing and suddenly, death appears and goes boom. for those last words of his, what boom boom, no, no, actually, he, he didn't have any last words, did he make any metal noise? no noise so well, you know, those kind of guttural noises that, uh, or maybe that kind of high-pitched tone that you were. lower than that for you I wouldn't wait I'm going to be here a while there you are oh talking Susan you have to cry to cry oh I always thought the Irish were right to do all that crying Jamie yeah, do you want to kill?

No thanks, no, yeah, how about seeing a spiritual black? I don't think so, it's very certain that he's coming, he's going to take me. Oh, there's not much to come, don't you want to see, no, no, no, no. I don't want to sing and I don't want to continue if you don't mind I would like to tend to the other mourners Susan Susan are you trying to avoid sadness and I can't let you do that oh please? Let me do that. It's been a terrible day. I have to bury my husband here. I'm going to miss you a lot.

How did you meet my husband? oh, we used to take the commuter train together oh well, he was the only person on that The whole damn train was nice to me, oh, the other people had that panicked look in their eyes when I approached him, they tried to walk away, oh , but not your husband, no, no, he was always kind to me, oh, not like my father. He would never return my phone calls even though I had the seance and all that good stuff, he's dead but I got a medium who gave me an 800 number that allows you to call the dead after 8 o'clock.

Thank you very much for coming, oh you. You're welcome, I just don't know what I'm going to do. I'm not trained without your husband. Well, why don't you read a book? Oh, how good, you don't listen to my favorite book about the elephant. Thank you so much for coming and bye oh why are you leaving no you're not leaving can't you take a hint making me hysterical for coming that's code or leave now I understand, obviously not? Sorry, I always thought men thank you. Much more to come there's something else you said that was in code I didn't understand I don't believe it just go away wait wait wait wait wait please wait.

I'm sorry, please accept my apology. Very sorry. allowing my anger to show up oh come on prisoner of war what are you crazy? Are you sure you don't want a Keane? I don't know and maybe another time please, there's no time now to try, but just no. I don't know if I could No, yeah, you can't come, it's a wonderful, wonderful sound, I've never heard it before, it's kind of like oh, okay, she's crying, no, it was a bit surprising. I don't know if I could. I've just never done anything like this, let it out like this you have to let it out could you help me?

I was a soft coach. Oh ha, thanks Marcus, have a good day. Chow just asked if we can do this one more time. Uh, I don't know, I have no idea what he's going to do, so I figure well, what the hell leave it? Well I don't know, so what are you praying for me? Thank you very much for coming, thank you, thank you, Randy, thank you. Thank you so much for coming Susie, let me offer you my deepest condolences. Thanks Morris as the cat. Thank you. Thank you very much for coming. We will all miss him terribly.

Yes, we will all miss him terribly. Oh, you must feel terrible. Well, me. don't feel good about the terrible shock Oh, death is always nature's way of saying, look please, there you are sitting at home and death comes over and says your tables are ready. I had a hamster named Tom that died and was spinning on the wheel. It wasn't a pretty picture, okay, so don't keep saying, oh, I'm Susan, it's so bad for you. I wouldn't wait. I'll be here for a while. There's some coffee in the embalming room, but it tastes good. I always thought the Irish would ride Keaney.

Do you want a king? Keaney, no, no, I don't think you know that well, how about you sing a black spiritual? No, I don't think so, so you jumped, you turned with your belly. Husband, he was kind to me. I got a medium who gave me an 800 number that allows you to call the dead after 8 o'clock, maybe I can give you the number and you can try to call your husband on the other side, maybe contact Elvis. What the hell try it? Thank you very much for coming. Well, you will come. I just think I don't know what I'm going to do on that train without your husband.

Well, that's a good idea. Do you have any suggestion. I don't mind. Well, what about Stephen King? I'm sorry for those zombies. I'm sorry for the good, forgive me. I think it's so special that you share this moment with me. I want to tell you more about myself from my hamster Tom. I died I pedestal these little claws at home like this thank you thank you very much for coming and goodbye wait wait where are you going? I think I'm just going anywhere you're the one going, can't you take a hint when? I'm telling you, thank you for coming, that's code for leaving now.

I don't want to hear about your little gangster anymore, too much coffee, Susan, I'm sorry, I always thought it was okay, thanks for coming, that's exactly what I wanted to say.