Bruno Mars Carpool Karaoke

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR HELPING ME GET TO WORK TODAY. THIS TRAFFIC HAS BEEN EXCELLENT. WHAT WE HAVE? ♪ TONIGHT I JUST WANT TO TAKE YOU HIGHER ♪ THROW YOUR HANDS TO THE SKY SING IT JAMES! James: SING, LET'S START THIS PARTY RIGHT ♪ PLAYERS, PUT YOUR PINKY RINGS TO THE MOON ♪ GIRLS, WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO? ♪ TWENTY-FOUR CARAT MAGIC IN THE AIR ♪ SOUL PLAYER FROM HEAD TO TOE ♪ CARE UH SECOND VERSE FOR THE HUSTLAS ♪ GANGSTAS, BAD BITCHES AND UGLY FRIENDS ♪ CAN I PREACH? Can I PREACH? ♪ I HAVE TO SHOW THEM HOW TO GET A NEXT JOIN ♪ FIRST, TAKE YOUR SIP MAKE YOUR DIP ♪ SPEND YOUR MONEY LIKE MONEY WE TOO COOL ♪ ​​WE HAVE TO BLAME JESUS ​​BLESSED HASHTAG ♪ THEY'RE NOT READY FOR ME ♪ I'M A BAD MAN GROSS WITH SOME MONEY IN MY POCKET ♪ SO MANY PRETTY GIRLS AROUND ME AND THEY WAKE UP THE ROCKET ♪ WHY DID YOU ANGRY TO FIX YOUR FACE ♪ IT'S NOT MY FAULT YOU'RE PLAYING ♪ PLAYERS, PUT YOUR PINKY RINGS TO THE MOON ♪ GIRLS, WHAT ARE YOU?

EVERYONE TRYING TO DO? James: IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE IN A GOOD MOOD. WHAT NOT TO LOVE? James: I WAS GOING TO SAY IF I USED THAT LEVEL OF SILK, I WOULD BE HAPPY TOO. IF I COULD LIKE THIS EVERY DAY I WOULD BE OVER THE MOON. THERE IS NO CHANCE, IF I WOULD USE IT I WOULD LIKE HOW I WAS HAVING A BREAKDOWN. I MEAN IT'S SO... IT'S A BREATHABLE FABRIC. DON'T YOU WANT THAT ON YOUR SKIN? James: OF COURSE I WANT IT ON MY SKIN, 2, 4, 7, 3, 45. THERE'S A HAT THAT COMES WITH IT. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH HIM.

James: IS THAT CORRECT? I HAVE SOME HATS HERE, IF I WEAR THIS HAT I LOOK LIKE AN Undertaker. OR MY DRIVER. James: LET'S WATCH THIS. IT'S ALMOST FLASH ALMOST FLASH. Wait, what's up with this guy? JAMES. James: I CAN'T USE THIS. THIS IS WHAT I FEEL LIKE A HAT YOU WOULD WEAR. SEE WHAT I MEAN? LOOK AT ME! I mean you are absolutely serious. IT'S CRAZY. WAIT, HERE'S THE ONE. I FEEL LIKE I'M JUST A GUY WHO IS CONSTANTLY WAITING FOR HIS ♪ I NEVER HAD MUCH FAITH IN LOVE OR MIRACLES, MIRACLES, UH! ♪ I NEVER WANT TO PUT MY HEART AT Stake, UH! ♪ STAY OFF YOUR CASE BECAUSE I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE THE LIGHT ♪ ♪ BUT I WANT TO STAY AYAY YOU TAKE BECAUSE YOUR SEX ♪ TAKES ME TO PARADISE YES YOUR SEX ♪ TAKES ME TO PARADISE AND SHOWS ♪ YES, YES, YES, BECAUSE YOU MAKE ME FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN OUT OF HEAVEN FOR TOO LONG, FOR TOO LONG ♪ YES, YOU MAKE ME FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN OUT OF HEAVEN ♪ FOR TOO LONG, TOO LONG (Applause and applause) I KNOW: I WANT TO ACT AND THIS IS WHAT WHAT I WANT TO DO?

FOUR YEARS. James: FOUR YEARS. DOING WHAT? I WAS DOING ELVIS PRESLEY. James: CLOSE THE FRONT DOOR. IN WAIKIKI. James: WHAT DID YOU DO? GOING TO A PARTY AT THE COUNTY JAIL ♪ ♪ HE STARTED SINGING ♪ ♪ YOU SHOULD HAVE HEARD THAT JAILBIRD SING ♪ ♪ WE'RE ALL GOING TO ROCK, WE'RE ALL GOING TO ROCK PHOTO♪ James: DON'T HAVE LIPS. WELL NO, WHICH IS VERY GOOD EVEN IN THIS CAR RIGHT NOW YOU'RE YOUNG ELVIS AND I'M FAT ELVIS. WILL WE EVER HAVE A FAT BRUNO, THAT'S WHAT I WANT TO KNOW, IS THERE A TIME WHEN YOU ARE JUDGES ARE GOING TO TOWN TON BURGERS AND THE FRIES?

IF THAT HAPPENED THEN I DIDN'T MAKE IT ♪ I WOULD CATCH A GRENADE FOR YOU I WOULD THROW MY HEAD ON A LEAF FOR YOU ♪ I WOULD JUMP IN FRONT OF A TRAIN FOR YOU ♪ YOU KNOW I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR YOU ♪ OH OH, I WOULD GO THROUGH ALL THIS PAIN ♪ I WOULD TAKE A BULLET STRAIGHT THROUGH MY BRAIN ♪ YES, I WOULD DIE FOR YOU BABY BUT YOU WOULDN'T DO THE SAME James: ..IF THE PIN WAS ON THE GRENADE, I WOULD CATCH IT. BUT IF YOU TOOK IT AWAY I WOULD RUN. .♪ VERSACE ON THE FLOOR ♪ OH TAKE IT OFF FOR ME FOR ME, FOR ME NOW, GIRL ♪ VERSACE ON THE FLOOR OH, TAKE IT OFF FOR ME, FOR ME, ♪ FOR ME, FOR ME NOW, GIRL I OPEN MY BACK ♪ TO SEE HIM FALL James: NOW THIS LINE, I open the back zipper and WATCHING IT FALL OUT IS A VERY ROMANTIC WAY BUT WHEN I GET HOME TO MY WIFE AND SHE SAYS CAN YOU UNDO THIS?

IT TAKES ME ABOUT FOUR TO SIX MINUTES IN WHICH ALL THE ROMANCE IS GONE. BECAUSE THERE'S A SMALL ONE AT THE TOP, WHICH YOU CAN'T. IT'S A PUZZLE, BUT THEN YOU HAVE THE WHIPPING IN THE SONG. YOU ARE NOT BACKLESS. THAT'S FOR REMAKE. ♪ LET'S KISS UNTIL WE'RE NAKED ♪ OOH, VERSACE ON THE FLOOR ♪ TAKE IT OFF FOR ME, FOR ME, FOR ME, FOR ME NOW, GIRL ♪ VERSACE ON THE FLOOR LET THE SHOULDER DO THE TALKING. James: ..A WOMAN LIKE THIS WAS NOT EXCITED. LET THEM KNOW. James: I'M CONFUSED. IT'S DIFFERENT WHEN I DO IT. I'M SPRAYING. BEHIND THE SHOULDER, GO.

James: Okay. WELL. I AM IN THE SHOULDER AREA. YOU LICK YOUR LIPS. It won't be until you're licking your lips. DECELERATE. ♪ CAN YOU FEEL IT, IT'S GETTING WARM UP ♪ ♪ CAN YOU FEEL IT, IT'S GETTING WARM UP ♪ ♪ CAN YOU FEEL IT, BABY? IT'S WARMING UP ♪ OH, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE READY FOR MORE, MORE, MORE ♪ LET'S KISS UNTIL WE'RE NAKED ♪ OOH, VERSACE ON THE FLOOR James: YOU AND I ARE VERY DIFFERENT IN THE BEDROOM. If I did that kind of shoulder movement, I'd be living alone in E-with a roommate above a gas station. AND THE SNOB I LIVE WITH IS VERSACE.

WHAT DO THEY WEAR? James: GOAL. ♪ THE ONE YOU WANT TO LOVE AND ANOTHER PERSON'S ARMS ♪ ♪ AND ALL THE THINGS I'VE DONE ♪ YES I KNEW that one day you would come ♪ NOW BABY NOW BABY NOW BABY OH BABY PLEASE COME ON ♪ LEAVE THE PAST BEHIND SO WE CAN GO WHERE LOVE ♪ IT WILL FIND US YES, IT WILL FIND US ♪ I KNOW ONCE THE GIRLS WOULD LEAVE ME ♪ BUT I KNOW THEY BELIEVE ME (Applause and applause) James: SO WHAT'S YOUR RIDER? ? WHAT DO YOU ASK FOR IN YOUR DRESSING ROOM? WHAT DO I WANT IN MY DRESSING ROOM? SOME DRINK, SOME WATER, WET WIPES.

James: THAT'S IT, HOT WET WIPES? BECAUSE IF I GO HOME WITH ONLY A BOTTLE OF WINE AND SOME WET WIPES, IT'S A TRAGIC AFTERNOON FOR ME. THAT'S THE NEXT ALBUM. James: WINE AND WET WIPES? Exploit the court and clean. REMOVE THE CORK AND CLEAN REMOVE THE CORK AND CLEAN. WAIT A MINUTE! CLEAN MY FACE, PUT A LIQUOR WITH IT. James: HUGE FACT, ♪ THIS SUCCESS, THAT MICHELLE PFEIFFER ICE CREAM ♪ THAT WHITE GOLD THIS FOR THE GIRLS IN HOODS ♪ THE GOOD GIRLS STRAIGHT MASTERPIECES ♪ STYLE, WHILE, LIVING IN THE CITY ♪ I HAVE CHUCKS ON WITH SAINT LAURENT ♪ ME KISS I'M SO PRETTY ♪ I'M TOO HOT HOT DAMN ♪ I CALLED A POLICE AND A FIREFIGHTER I'M TOO HOT ♪ HOT DAMN MAKE A DRAGON WANT TO RETIRE MAN ♪ I'M TOO HOT HOT DAMN ♪ SAY MY NAME YOU KNOW WHO N AM ♪ I'M TOO HOT HOT DAMN ♪ AM I BAD FOR THAT MONEY SPLIT IT ♪ THE GIRLS HIT YOUR HALLELUJAH WHO THE GIRLS HIT YOUR HALLELUJAH WHO ♪ THE GIRLS HIT YOUR HALLELUJAH WHO BECAUSE UPTOWN FUNK ♪ GON' GIVE IT BECAUSE UPTOWN FUNK ♪ I GIVE IT TO YOU BECAUSE UPTOWN FUNK K ♪ HE GAVE IT TO YOU SATURDAY NIGHT ♪ AND WE AT THE PLACE DON'T BELIEVE ME ♪ JUST LOOK DON'T BELIEVE ME JUST LOOK ♪ UPTOWN FUNK YOU UP UPTOWN FUNK YOU UP ♪ UPTOWN FUNK YOU UP UPTOWN FUNK YOU UP ♪ UPTOWN FUNK YOU UP UPTOWN FUNK YOU UP ♪ UPTOWN FUNK YOU UP UPTOWN FUNK YOU UP ♪ UPTOWN FUNK YOU UP UPTOWN FUNK YOU UP ♪ UPTOWN FUNK YOU UP (Applause and applause) James: ONCE MORE?

UP TOWN FUNK YOU UP UPTOWN FUNK YOU UP (LAUGHTER) James: WHEN YOU MOVE TO L.A. IS IT TRUE THAT YOU MADE THE RENT PLAYING WITH CASH? GIVE ME THE FACE THAT SAYS I HAVE IT, EVEN THOUGH I KNOW THERE'S NOTHING HERE, READY? YOU MUST BE FAST. WORTHY OF AN OSCAR. James: PICK UP THE CARDS AND THEY ARE TERRIBLE. IF YOU WANT ME TO THINK -- James: YOU'RE KEEPING SEE, THAT SAYS HOW GOOD YOU ARE AT CARDS. I LIFT THEM UP. YOU WERE SO PROFESSIONAL THAT ♪ IT'S MY BIRTHDAY NO IT'S NOT ♪ BUT I STILL LOOK GOOD EVEN THOUGH THE COMB IS HIGH ♪ I BET YOU WANT AN AUTOGRAPH FOR YOU AND YOUR FRIENDS ♪ I HAVE TO DO IT IN THE ATTIC WHICH IS WHERE I STILL MY PEN ♪ YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO DANCE?

IT HAS NO RHYTHM? WHAT DO YOU HAVE A MAN? ♪ I DON'T SEE YOU WITH HIM PUT YOUR PHONE DOWN ♪ LET'S FORGET YOUR INSTAGRAM ♪ AND YOUR TWITTER MAKES ME LIKE WOAH, WAIT A MINUTE ♪ YOU NEED TO TAKE A MINUTE Loosen their shoulders ♪ SEE IT, GET TO WORK PUT SOME PERM IN YOUR ATTITUDE ♪ GIRL , YOU HAVE TO RELAX, OOH, LET ME SHOW YOU ♪ WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO, YOU HAVE TO LEAVE IT ♪ IN FACT? BAND, SHOW HOW TO ♪ PUT IT BACK! SHOW HIM HOW TO PUT IT BACK ♪ SHOW HIM HOW TO PUT IT BACK SHOW HIM HOW TO PUT IT BACK ♪ VERY GOOD!

James: I HAVE NEVER FELT MORE ALIVE! I TOLD YOU SO, I TOLD YOU SO! (Applause and applause)