*2 HOURS* Of Jeffy Marathon!

like nine, well, anyone who has Freddy? Krueger in it, it would be all of them, so yeah, I heard the dream of Freddy Krueger and Jeffy trying to kill him. Marvin, that's ridiculous, oh no, I believe you. Freddy is very real and, in fact, he kills people all the time, whenever we can. To solve a case we simply attribute it to Freddy. Well, Freddy is in Jeffy's dream trying to kill him. How do we stop Freddy? Well, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that stopping it is quite easy. I know a guy who does that.

All the time you're doing what's-his-name maybe you've heard of Jason Voorhees, he's my cousin, oh yeah, he kicks Freddie's ass all the time, so that's the good news, oh, the column, we'll see, That's the bad news, the bad news is that he lives. at the bottom of a lake and it only comes out on Friday the 13th and today is Saturday the 29th not even close well well maybe even maybe you can do yourself a favor and go out today instead of the 13th I mean it lives at the bottom of a lake so really I can't call him, but I guess I could send him an email, yeah, do what you have to do, hey, Cuzzo, it's me.

You know that thing you usually do on Friday the 13th? I need you to do it on Saturday the 29th, please, thank you very much, okay, let's see if he responds, oh, look everyone, he showed up. I know, Jason, I'm sorry, I know it's not his day, we really need his help, yeah, so, Mr. Voorhees, Jason, sir, um my. son Jeffy, has been having a lot of nightmares about this guy Freddy who is trying to kill him and we want to know how to stop him, so Jason says that Jeffy needs to go back to sleep and when he dreams about Freddy he needs to do it. steal Freddie's hat because Freddy hates that and that will bring Freddie to the real world and then Jason can kick his ass oh okay, okay Jeffy, let's go to sleep so you can take Freddy riding, okay, uh, Jason He also wants to know if you're going to finish that garlic sauce on the pizza because we're hungry, guys, you can eat it.

Jeffy, go to sleep and when you see Freddy, grab his hat, it's okay, dad, it's okay, I'm back on your street. Where is the? Oh, I've got your hat, Dad, I've got it, give it a Jessie, give it to Jason, hey, he did it, yeah, he killed Freddy, yeah, he does, but don't let him catch you on Friday the 13th, he won't be around. so friendly, that's when he kills everyone, so Jeffy, I hope you learned your lesson about not watching horror movies, I sure did Danny, so what are we going to do for the rest of the night?

Do you want to see the sequel? Yeah, okay, honey, what's next? Attracted to me Yes, of course, it's just that we don't spend time together anymore It's just that I've been very busy recently and I work long

hours

and I'm tired, okay, you don't even hold my hand, right? My hand goes back to sleep, okay, baby, I told you I'm not in the mood right now, oh, kill me, hey, dad, what happened to your eye? I don't know what I mean, you don't know you have a black eye, Jeffy. Did someone hit you Jeffy? I don't remember well, you mean you can't remember.

I would remember it whether someone punched me in the eye or not. I just don't know who did it. Marvin, we should call the police. Someone attacked Jeffy. Can? It doesn't mean no-ass assault Jeffy, did someone hit you or not? I don't know, we'll call the police, they'll find out who did it because they'll take the DNA out of your eye and check everyone's fist, Marvin. What if Jeffy is afraid to tell us because the person who hit him is threatening to hurt him more if he does? Jeffy is someone who is threatening you. I don't know if you say I don't know once again.

I'm going to hit you good. Now someone is threatening me. I'm going to call the police. Hey, someone call the police. Yes, officer, someone attacked my son. Apparently you can't spell assault without an ass. Bingo, this guy knows what I'm talking about. Look, we just want to press charges. about who did it well, well, who did it huh, we don't know what you mean, you don't know, you can't press charges against someone if you don't know who they are, Jeffy doesn't remember who did it, but wouldn't you like to scan his eye Looking for the fist print with the fist print?

What are you talking about? You could scan the fingerprints, yes. So you can't scan the fist print? And how to go to the fist print database and find out whose fist it is. It was a fingerprint database that doesn't exist, whether the fingerprint database and the fists are just curled fingers, so can't you get a fist out of the fingerprints? We find out who did it right the only way we're going to know is if he tells us or if the person who hit him hits someone else and they tell us who it was if he was like a serial hitter, well can't you put an alert on that? like there was someone punching people.

I'm not going to raise an alert for a vigilante with a fist, but she's punching people. He's on the loose right now. We don't even know what the guy looks like. So what are we supposed to do? Do it right, I'll tell you what you find out who it is and I'll arrest them. Okay, all I know is that I didn't do it right. I didn't ask you if you did. I know, but you're going to do it. I start asking questions about who did it and I just want to eliminate myself as a suspect because today I punched a kid in the face but it wasn't him, why did you punch him in the face?

Oh, he deserved it, believe me. I'll tell you earlier today I was patrolling in the park and it was a beautiful day so I was walking minding my own business and all of a sudden out of nowhere this kid runs up and pushes me and screams. I tag you and I wonder what the hell is this, some kind of game, so I start chasing him and I'm putting him on the burners because this kid is fast and he's running and he laughs and he never yells at you. Can you catch me and I'm like, oh, when he catches you, I'll smack your butt, so we run all over the park and then he trips and falls into a sandbox and I'm like, oh, I got it.

Now, you little bastard, and then he kicks sand in my face and I'm like, oh, you're not going to kick sand in my face, so I punch him in the face and I say, "Tag, it's you" and then he starts crying . and then his mother runs up and says, "You just punch my son in the face. I'm like, yeah, I did what you're going to do about it, so I throw her to the ground and start arresting her and then all these people runs". with their phones out and they start taking videos of me and I think that's not good so I start knocking out Haymakers, I start hitting everyone who has a phone and then I take away all their phones so there's no evidence of what I did and Run away, so yeah, that's why I hit that kid today.

Well, I guess if that's the only kid you hit, he waits a minute. I hit another kid today. What did you do? Why don't you worry? He wasn't your son, but you have to listen. This is even worse, so I run back to my house with all the phones I sold to people in the park and I throw them on the counter and say, honey, sell these phones on eBay because we're going to need the money for all the demands that we are about to receive, so he asked me where the phones came from and I told him that I had confiscated them from some criminals.

She says okay, I made you some pizza rolls for dinner, so I start jumping because I love me some pizza rolls, so I grab a handful of them and she says, "Careful, honey, those are hot and I I shut up, so I start stuffing those pizza rolls into my mouth and then my mouth is on fire, those pizza rolls are.” boiling hot, they're burning the shit out of my mouth, I mean, they're burning the roof of my mouth so much that I have a little piece of skin hanging off and I keep playing with it with my tongue, it stinks and then my wife, my wife. has the audacity to say I told you they were hot so I throw the plate at him I'm like I know I know what I did wrong you don't have to tell me I should have listened I know shut up so then I'm in a bad mood, right, and then I hear the doorbell ring.

I open the door and say, oh, this must be the angry crowd at the park, they want the phones back, but they don't, it's just some Girl Scouts selling Girl Scout cookies, so I open the door. At the door they say: Do you want some Girl Scout cookies? and I'm like hell, yeah, I want some Girl Scout cookies. Shut up, why am I here? Take my money, so I give it a right of 20 and then you won't believe this. Girl Scout says, "Okay, your cookies will be here in two or three weeks." What I say, wait, what the hell is it?

What type of Ponzi scheme is it? Are you really a Girl Scout? So I punch him in the face and take my money. About two or three weeks ago for cookies, what is this? The new iPhone of Girl Scout cookies. I'm looking to reserve cookies. That's ridiculous. I could order cookies on Amazon Prime and get them faster, so I go to the store and buy them. some Chips Ahoy and I'm happy so I sit on the couch and I'm like two or three weeks away from cookies, my butt, I say while I shove a cookie in my mouth in anger and then I hurt myself because I remember that I already burned my mouth with pizza rolls, so now my mouth hurts and I hate that stupid little piece of skin hanging off the roof of my mouth.

No, God, I hate him anyway, that was the second kid I hit, so you only hit two kids. Yeah, just two kids, I mean a bunch of adults in the park who had phones, but just two kids and neither of them was your kid, so how are we going to find out who hit Jeffy? I don't know, just ask around, but be quick. because they could fire me at the end of the day, Marvin, what are we going to do? Okay, so we have to go ask everyone we know if they saw who hit Jeffy or if Jeffy was hit, so let's split up so we can ask more people, okay, Marvin? thank you