You Decide How To Feel | Dr Gabor Maté

Every time you get shot, someone pulled the trigger maybe, but who is the one carrying the ammunition? How you handle people shooting at you, that's your decision, but at least know that you're the one who has all the explosive inside you and you get so much release. If you find out what that ammunition is and how you got it by knowing yourself and that's where freedom really lies, if no one had the power to activate you, not because you were closed off, shut down and isolated, but because you were totally self-aware, the The goal of compassion research is precisely to delve deeper into those core stories that people tell themselves, to get them to see what story they are unconsciously telling themselves, what those beliefs are, where they come from, and to show them how to guide them. to the possibility of letting go of those stories or letting go of the control that those stories have over them, it is simply a method of going deeper when I say drilling, I don't mean like a dentist, although pain may arise, but the difference between this method and the dentist is that the dentist necessarily causes pain in the course of his work and that is why most of the time he puts people to sleep before they do their job properly here it is the opposite, it is not that we cause pain but the pain can arise and we do not want to You must numb yourself if pain arises.

We want you to

feel

that pain. However, we're not supposed to cause it. It is already there and very often the stories we tell ourselves are attempts to distance ourselves from the pain. I'm talking about the conscious stories to get away from the pain or from someone to manage it and those efforts to manage the pain so as not to

feel

it then they are the basic cause of the disease, whether it is a physiological disease, well, all diseases are physiological, but if The obviously identified diseases such as autoimmune diseases, neurological diseases, from multiple sclerosis to chronic skin conditions, all of them have unresolved and unacknowledged emotional foundations and, in my opinion, those foundations are strongly rooted in the childhood of a person, not just in the sense of emotional dynamics and the stories we tell ourselves, but even very often in our physiology I gave a talk in Vancouver on addiction and a woman came up to me and said she said cancer three Sometimes she is the type who just can't say no, who is always succumbing to other people's demands and expectations, I write about that in my book when the body says no, this is the basis of many illnesses and Julie had today and during breakfast she said well she calls it tns, terminal agreeableness syndrome and this woman fits the type and she says I can't stop doing it I can't stop I can't say no I can't I can't say no for example to my boss's expectations he says I don't understand I have been singing two hours a day for 20 years he has been doing spiritual work without which his life could be much more difficult it could be much less balanced however he is still unable to pronounce the word no despite 20 years of singing well, that is a spiritual bypass, that is why you do the spiritual work and you will be able to achieve great states of even unity or peace, serenity, joy and it may be true for you that it has really transformed your life and even It may be true that it has transformed your life but not in certain areas and where the spiritual work has not transformed your life enough.

It could be for two reasons: maybe you haven't practiced well or enough or maybe there is an emotional side that you haven't dealt with. Maybe there is some truth that you have not yet glimpsed or known. what to do and that is what compassion research complements spiritual work there will be times when some heavy emotions may arise when I say heavy emotions I literally mean emotions that are hard to bear and you know they are hard to carry that It's fine actually. It's probably a sign of lack of depth on our part, if that doesn't happen to some of you, it's not that we intend to cause it, it's just going to happen, so let's talk right now about what happens and how to handle it .

If that happens to you, first of all, there's nothing wrong if something triggers you, that's the buzzword these days, it's perfectly fine, but on the other hand, for the person who gets triggered, you might want to Consider what a trigger really is, so metaphor. it comes in some way it comes from weaponry because some, you know, instruments of war and the trigger is actually a very small part of the mechanism of the pistol or the rifle or the pistol or the revolver machine gun. There is a complete mechanism to deliver the ammunition. the ammunition itself there is something explosive that will propel the ammunition towards its target, then there is a trigger that is this big every time you are shot, someone pulled that trigger maybe, but who is the one carrying the ammunition, who has the mechanism to deliver the ammunition, who is the one with the explosive

mate

rial inside them and where do you want to put your attention, do you want to put your attention solely on the trigger or are you curious about what ammunition, what explosive

mate

rial you have inside, so it's really cool to work with triggers if you want to know yourself and if you don't get to know yourself then what we usually do is just resent whoever caused the trigger and we believe that they did this to us how do you handle people who trigger you that is your decision, but at least the last thing you should know is that you are the one who has all the explosive inside you and you get as much release if you find out what those munitions are and how you got them and if you can really defuse them like the defuser bomb you can.

Actually, diffuse that ammunition within yourself by knowing yourself and that's where freedom really lies when no one has done it, if no one had the power to activate you, not because you were closed off, shut down and isolated, but because you are totally aware. of yourself. or that's where liberation really is and that's what I think all spiritual teachers want to educate people to do it in their own particular way here we do it differently here we do what I would call the archeology of the mind, you know, the oncologist has some very They're fine tools and they're very careful, you know, they don't just dig in there with their big shovel and you know they apply force, it's more like very gently dusting small objects and looking at them and looking at them, which is really. zoom in and see how they all fit together and maybe what were broken fragments really are a beautiful voice uh once the archaeologist has finished his work and in this case you are invited to be your own archaeologist of the mind.