The Complete Karl Pilkington's Inspirational Quotes & Sayings, with Ricky Gervais & Stephen Merchant

regarding Carl, I have never understood so little of what a man says before, practically everything Carl talked about was distant to me, what the hell was he ranting about flies and condoms, monkeys and pressing the left button, cavemen and dinosaurs, and that's just some of I mean, let's be honest, if you're in America, I mean a lot of the accent, it's probably a problem, but that's the best article we've ever had, yeah, flies and imagine if You're a new listener, flies and condoms, what does the earth do? I mean this is from Kent Plummer from Nova Scotia, Canada, says Karl, wondering if you have any personal mantras that you can pass on, for example, it reminds us of Ben Franklin's famous mantra.

Waste not, want not, who said Ben Franklin, what was he? What did he do for this job? Benjamin Franklin was a highly respected American politician of the 1800s. He was a deeply respected thinker, philosopher, and scientist. I was in an analytical figure. He appears on a dollar bill. Oh, a dollar bill or something. Yes, so he is. he is one of the great thinkers of the American Enlightenment and he came up with the mantra waste not want you must not know why it is not what I don't mean that's just you understand the phrase waste not want not know I really know what it means I never heard that I thought about that I think I heard it but I don't know I know I've never used it but when someone said it I don't know what it will be in context I mean everything What I'm going to do now is paraphrase that and put some prepositions and things like that in it .

I can't understand how you can't understand what that means, it's like not throwing things away because you might need them and therefore you won't want anything because you didn't throw it away so better ah then then he was a guy who doesn't waste food for example he was a little hoarder for God's sake no but I'm just saying you know he's a man in power is the best thing he ever said no I'm sure he came up with many, many deep deficiencies in electricity and in the conduction of electricity, all. Stein puts more pressure on me by inventing electricity than someone for whom he did not empty linearity. they'll put more into you than just I'm just saying waste I don't want to I don't think it's that good it's not even catchy what I don't understand this guy I was the first person to suggest look don't go throwing that away, save it, you might need it later, I wasn't the first person who, again, that's brilliant, that wasn't understood now, it's incredible, you came up with that, that's poetry, how would you say it?

I'm just saying more, no, don't throw it away, you might need it later, don't check it, you might need it later, Karl Pilkington, while it sounds like you waste, you don't want to, no, maybe it's a bit more concise. a little bit we should go over great

sayings

and phases and set and say feel free since you know what they mean and then secondly you can improve them that will be brilliant making the ones that like them die so uh um let's say okay , Winston Churchill, um, never. So few have done so much for so many, what to think about that, how would you do it?

Do you know what that means? It's so easy to say, well, it's in regards to the Battle of Britain and the pilots who gave their lives. was one of them who gave a lot for a few or whatever, he didn't give a lot for so many, you were yes, if you are one of those few who earn so much for something, that is, it means that these few good men what are their actions . they liberated the world from which they are free, they have an impact on all the people in the world and there were still few brave men and that's what he says, yes, but what I'm saying is that if I were one of those men who gave up. his life is correct.

I would like a name verification. I want to be wrong with everyone else who says that a lot of guys gave lives well done. See you later. That's brilliant. so you can ruin it you invented a word look that's what you see we've been looking for it that's original that's Karl Pilkington I don't want to be ruined but anyway we're talking about Saenz and that stitch in time saves nine, no you don't know , I will never use that, I think any tsunami will never fully understand it. I chose things that weren't fixed anyway, but what about the warning on greenhouses and that we live in glass houses?

You shouldn't throw stones, yes, what do you want? There's that computer that you never understood, no, that's much clearer and it's like saying, don't throw things if you're surrounded by glass and what about you, yes, but no. forget it's an analogy, it's a metaphor, it's not to be taken, it's not really just about talking to people who live in glass houses, I mean: I'm sorry before I say that Rick, I'm just curious to know if he's I

complete

ly faced this. You just give us your explanation again of what you understand to mean that we just won't reach for the canned stuff about Chris.

Oh, well, if that were all, they just say no, no, but the stains have existed. much longer than we think, that was when people probably lived in basic glass houses and things that no one ever went into like a house, so cavemen went from rock to a nice glass structure today , what are we talking about? they were living gonzo now when that sounds used now they mean more or less you know telly plasma ornaments now they don't say don't cut things on glue no it's not about damaging your own property they don't mean you're inside the house of glass throwing stones into your own glass, so metaphor means don't try to attack people if you yourself have more to lose, I mean, it means it could be, it could be anything, no, don't start. a war that could also go wrong is about how fragile your situation is if you live in a glass house metaphorically don't throw stones at someone else because when he throws them back at you your house is damaged more easily than his Again the metaphor if that doesn't mean that if you live in a glass house or a house with other precious objects you don't throw bricks at your own house because that would be a very specific audience that we're trying to reach. that phrase I mean, let's be honest, what kind of mentally knowing what I think we have the crux of the matter today, so I think I'm going to answer, but right, Karl, what is an analogy?

Ah, it's like a little story told quickly. It's a little story told quickly to what end well, it depends on what the story is well give me one give me an analogy well for me I thought I had won with the green house yes um no it's no, it's a green house it's a glass space yes yes everything at that moment a glass house is fine, right, you did it, what I mean is that the glass house is metaphorical, it's about the fragility of your situation compared to your aggression or you see, I just prefer you know what you say is what you mean, so people If you live in a glass house, you have to open the door.

I do not know what that means. I do not know what that means. I mean because you can be a genius because I don't understand how people live in glass houses after answering. the door is fine, let's listen to his explanation because the people who knock on the door let's see if it's a glass house, but what do you mean literally? There really is no analogy. There are metaphors for you. You literally mean if you live in a glass house and someone doesn't. there is no there is no hidden meaning there is good normal but you don't divide either you have to add a thicker amount another another cover but surely if you live in a glass house don't walk around naked yes if you live in If they are literal, see if you know they could know you , you could actually turn that into a pretty nice saying, because if that meant someone told me that and it wasn't a shaved chimpanzee, right, they said people live in glass houses afterwards.

Answer the door, I think that means at all, yes, it means that there are no secrets that you can't hide behind anything if you are very open, if you have chosen to be wide open as long as you can. Don't do it again, so people, if you use everything, just leave, if you scream and tell the truth and you can't go back, they can see, they can see through you, you can also say that, yeah, that's helpful. but I just have the idea that in your head you need to have

sayings

for people who live in glass houses, who lives in a glass?

Although I'm NOT talking about making sure you're stuck if everyone else runs out of these people. who live in glass houses, let's get to the real problems we have, don't take over the world's idea, because similar people who live in glass houses should live near Church, well, there is another saying right now that I I recently learned overnight what an elephant in the room is. Okay, I don't know, but explain it to me. It's like when something happens in a room, right?, but no one mentions it because everyone is a little... but in a way it's better that it comes out, it's like you know each other every time we go out to eat or drink or something well, it's usually after about five minutes, the topic takes the shape of my head, yeah, yeah, well.

This is the correct shape of your head, so your appetite, although it is the state that I am tightly bound, but I mean, it is a fascinating little object, perfectly round, it has no hair where it should have it and it is in the gap the features are too small for the face, yeah, I don't believe it, but what I'm saying is that now it's interesting, like it's the elephant in the room, right, no one talks about it, you mention it once, suddenly it's a chat. of the city is what I mean, everyone starts to come together, well, yes, it's round, but it fits, yes, and these are people who sometimes don't even know it and they all dive in and that's an elephant in a room, so I don't want people to talk about the shape of your head, even though the lack of hair would make you feel better, you would be happy if they didn't mention that.

Sometimes I think it's better that he's out there, although it has made me a stronger person. in the same way that you know we are talking about religion in that Samson Delilah, yes, he became weak without breath mmm, while with me I think it made me stronger because you know it's almost like they treat it like a disability, everyone mention and speak. About that, what is a dead ball like? And yeah, I mean, it's made me stronger, but would you ever wear a wig and not always a long wig like Samson? Well, the only time I wanted a wig was when I made one with George, okay?

Okay, and it was annoying that I was sitting on the jury in front of these criminals, right, everyone else has costumes, the judges have wigs, right, it's not this guy, he has a lot of costumes, that's why the judges wear them well, so we. put his name in the steam another photo what you mean is that this guy to disguise himself knows if he was disguised they would come in with one of those glasses with the nose and beard attached if it was this guy all the judges would be Groucho Marx, if it was a disguise, well, I'm just saying that's what bothered me when I was sitting in the front row, on the right, I couldn't have been closer to the criminals, no, or sitting there, and I thought why not?

Don't I wear a little wig in the front row of the Crown Court? No, because in this country you are not allowed to show photographs of jurors, you cannot take photographs in a courtroom, so there are always cartoonists who draw pictures and there is this idea in the news that we look like eleven people and kind of a Krusty the Clown figure whatever surprises yeah I would love to see the artists do interviews because it would be like complicated people or hanussen in accountants and then just a little round Charlie Brown grabs it oh yeah again I don't remember what show was this we were discussing this but we talked about one and phrases and

quotes

from the past we talked about Benjamin Franklin people have this is an email I said Carl, what do you think of the well-known saying a stitch in time saves nine a stitch a time saves nine or a stitch in time saves nine yes, see you, it's another one that doesn't, I don't think I have noticed many of these signs that I have been told about, whether I want it or not, whether I want it or not, whether I want it or not , yes, but again it's one of them like last week.

I heard they bought it, but the holders want it. -it doesn't mean anything, it's like throwing around what you would mean, but what I said what does it mean what is the term whether you want it or not it just means you know carefree, that's true, yes, that's fine, but what does a stitch mean? ? Time saves whether you want it or not, so you used a phrase, I mean, you used it, you said it, whether you want it or not, but you got the gist of it, so what does one stitch in time, save nine, mean no?

I know what you do. I don't know, think about it, a stitch in time saves nine, does it have to do with sewing? Well, yes, more or less, if it's not so clear, if you have a tube, you have a jacket, yes, and the seam starts to come apart, oh, there's a A little seam that I'll leave will always get worse than dry, soon your manga will fall off so I only need one stitch there, I would if you do it now, you'll need nine stitches and that of course is an analogy. to other things, if you leave something that needs attention or repair, it will get worse, so do it now, do it on time, well, you might as well have said that a chip in saves nine in theXX has happened, they just don't want to be a part of it, they look up and they see planes and they know what they are and they go into town and they see it in their window, Dickson's or telly they just just don't want to be a part of it now they're still living They're still living like yeah, yeah, I mean, yeah, but they don't know it, they know about everything else. they just don't want to be part of it because they think the revolution was a bad thing, they think society became more and more dispossessed and they wanted to get away from it and they want to go back to the old values ​​and they think I don't need television and jets in that way of life , they can, they can survive the old fashioned way because it was always better to miss Live 8, yeah, yeah, but they didn't add band-aids, yeah, yeah.

I think this is the problem that car had in his mind they were a little behind, so now in his head they were slowly moving towards that, I could see most of these bands, all their electric guitars, they could be allow us to see Tracy Chapman, yes, taking a hit. set of sticks, yeah, between the bands, yeah, that'll be fine, they're doing it because it matters, it's like he, even though they don't like the fast car, they don't like to think about it. I'm going to the noise talking about just trap, you have a pony. in the talk, that would be nice, but do they still do it?

They still get some kind of trash post about it saying we need your money for this or you know, giving it away. It's like a community, they see each other, they are farmers, right? We are farmers, it is an agricultural community and they are obviously very religious. In fact, it would suit you very well because you hate crowds, you hate groups of people. You don't like the modern world. What you'd love there would be I wouldn't want to get up at 4 o'clock to milk a cow, it would be fine, no, but it gives you, get out of bed, well, yeah, I'm probably out, I mean, if they have anything to do with it with Lyari Krishna's people, no, no, nothing. not at all because of all the religions that's you know I'm not a religious person oh no I don't understand anything about you our Krishna because you have the advantage that's it if you get halfway there yeah well the thing it's out of everything you, what's our money, it'll just come out of my pocket, well I'm actually lying down, that's the danger of wearing sweatpants everywhere you go, I almost never lie down in the chair.

I've never been the religious type, you know, think what I do, I let it do it, whatever suits you, but of all of them I want one that doesn't take over your life. I don't want to in any way. you have to get up three times a day and you have a gun praying that you have to get up early forget that getting in the way I thought if it's something like I was walking to work the other day I crossed Oxford Street on the right, man there's a Un mate Krishna from the small area there and it's about getting a brochure and stuff and he said you know you're interested and I said what do you do and he said well you know we're against stressing out what do you have and did you give me? a plum and food for some reason because I kind of asked some questions, let's do these two bold people wearing an orange holding a plan with me and silver the plot put lime it's almost like you can imagine some kind of religious painting exactly, yeah, yeah , you know what her main interest is, because she didn't really tell me that when she was Japanese, so I didn't know what you were saying, not much, why she didn't speak.

English not not very well, it was not the best seller to send you what I am saying, yes, but what is that? Are you saying they look nothing alike? I think a green laser is kind of a branch of us or the Buddhist faith, it's whatever, but it's not like, and obviously what you see the most is kind of a trademark, so to speak, is that they have to say, I think they have to say Harry Herry Herry Krishna in a certain rhythm in a certain order a certain number of times a day, that's why you see the modern industry say Harry for the crucial stage because it's actually a religious chant that are forced to do, so even if you come into the Hare Krishna faith, you may find yourself, you know, in Tesco every time you are forced to say Hare Krishna Hare Hare Krishna, proud and wise thinking yes, no, no , like you could put it on an iPod and you might like what no, it doesn't come, no, you really said it.

I guess that eats up your social life a little bit and then there's the fact that we're in orange too, particularly the speculation if you're in a cinema or a library, a little awkward, you know, halfway through. or standing next to a guy called Harry Krishna, yeah, oh, he constantly thinks you call him, yeah, like that, probably, yeah, so that's innocent. I mean, I don't think we've done the Harry Krishna faith, it's a full service there, but it's very interesting. I mean they gave you a plum, they treated you well, yeah, well, but you couldn't, I just walked for a long time, I would take what are the benefits, you know, what can you do, what can I think about the benefits?

They probably don't get stressed, they probably have that kind of Zen, that genre about them where they try to interact and they're quite meditative, yeah, yeah, I've got some good trainers too, right? There, yes, orange, what are you looking for? So, in an auto-da-fe, you say, what are the benefits. I mean, obviously Catholicism you get communion wine and bread, so yeah, but I can afford that and I probably only like the crusaders. I was forced to join that when I was a kid because I kind of joined in and he socks, will you join her? In a way, I swore I am.

I said I won't do that. I knew he said he was right if you don't come. with me I'll tell you mom, you just got ah, so I won, so I went and they used to go on Friday when they played, you know, Cebu tio and stuff and then I went on a Sunday and it was was totally different, he wasn't Cebu tio, There wasn't any kind of, you know, table tennis, that thing where you hold a thing and throw things over the old bowling pins, there was a Friday that was Sunday, it was rubbish, he said, I'm sorry.

In this room he gave me a Bible. I thought this looks too heavy. This is too big. I'm not interested in this book and never went back. I even hid one Sunday when he came and that was the only thing like that. I said, Lee wise, the city turned out after Hide understood that when they came because they wouldn't, they wouldn't leave, they wouldn't leave, it was the adults, it was some kind of pit, he seemed capable of me at the time, but he probably has about 27 years old, oh that's not so boring, yeah, but I mean he looked a lot older when I was a kid, yeah, he came knocking on the door and that needs to tell me mom or just tell it or something and he swayed. around to see if I eventually come out to play with it and if I did I think he would have grabbed me and taken me there.

I don't think that ideally, for you, religion has to bring with it some kind of gift, it's like you. Join our faith and you will receive a lot of clock radios, it's like something, but I think religion brings a gift, usually it's a command to the Lord, well, the gift of eternal life, isn't it? And that's the problem, you know too much. people believe in it because they think, but the Wickfords are fine, their feeling is that it should be taken for granted, that's for sure, I will definitely go home to eternal life, but what else can I have?

I have to have a religion because obviously I don't have a religion, I don't miss it and I wouldn't want to have one. I'm an atheist and that's because that's our belief, that's out of logic and we don't get into the politics or morality of that. Because? You feel like you need a religion, well you just get a hobby. Well, I didn't want one, I don't want one, I was just saying you know, if I had one, which one would I choose, is what I'm saying. mmm I would like to see you maybe as a Jew I think Judaism would be good for you I think what they always like that's why it can be complicated that's what I mean I don't want any of that you know and they have a day when they don't eat and things to have company, eh, so they have days that they need too much, yes, but what happens, that day they will be angry like I said, I don't like change.