Trump Wants Mental Competency Tests, MTG Lashes Out Over Biden in Ukraine & Santos the Terrible Liar

looking at them I hope you had a good long weekend. Oh, I did. I feel rested. I feel red. I feel more alive than one of them being AI Chat Bots right now. Joe Biden did not have President's Day off. He made a surprise visit to Ukraine, instead, and while he usually surprises and 80-year-olds aren't a great match, this will work. President Zielinski was very happy to see it, you can see it was emotional and they must have been working on this for a while because Take a look at the video here and you will see that they are walking down the street which is not something we normally see with Zelensky and the honorable Biden with a plaque on what they call the Walk of the Brave, which is just a very prestigious distinction.

Another American has been enshrined on that street, which Weird Al Yankovic is very, very big, huge, actually, and then Biden hopped on a train for a 10-hour trip to Warsaw, no joke, where he greeted another surprised and enthusiastic group. I don't know why he's funny, but it'll be even funnier when he says it in Cleveland, but for now, Biden's appearance in Ukraine was pretty badass. I mean, if Trump had done this, Tucker Carlson would be fucking Hannity's leg. now he had been making those little laughing noises while doing it, but these guys can even take Biden's side on Russia Matt Gates Ron DeSantis Josh Hawley and of course Donald Trump, they all had something to say Trump was bragging about Putin I would never have entered Ukraine, if I were president I would actually have a very good relationship, yes, you had the kind of very good relationship that a ventriloquist has with his dummy, but of all the hot takes, none produced more residual vomit than Marjorie Soylent Green, who tweeted that this is incredibly insulting today. on our President's Day, Joe Biden, the president of the United States chose Ukraine over the United States, while forcing the American people to pay for the government of Ukraine and where I can't express how much Americans hate Joe Biden, well , it would be fair if nothing could really be expressed.

You're not from the Clan, Mom also said it was insulting that Zielinski wore a t-shirt during a meeting, but everyone knows that the respectful way to greet a president is to boo him on National Television during his speech, but the Russians are not happy with this. Putin announced today that they will suspend his participation in the nuclear weapons treaty. Until now we had an agreement with Russia that was basically: "show me your missile, I'll show you mine", the flagship treaty that limited the number of nuclear warheads. In 2010, the US and Russia decided it didn't make sense to spend more money on nuclear weapons, so we agreed that each of us would have and keep just enough nuclear weapons to blow up the other like 10 times, which seemed reasonable. , but now it's like Putin

wants

to do it. blow you up 11 times and of course we have no choice but to say then we're going to blow you up 12 times and that's how Jesus spoke in the Bible and as if we didn't already have enough to worry about what the possible nuclear war or UFOs Megan Fox and Machine Gun Kelly have been keeping me up late at night now we have a new existential threat which is the Canadian Super Pigs, have you heard about this in what they now call the Super Pig?

In the 1980s, when pig farmers bred a domestic pig with a wild boar, the idea was to breed an animal with more meat. I guess it worked because these pigs can weigh close to 700 pounds, of course, they have escaped from captivity and they are now wreaking havoc on everything in their path and they are heading towards the United States and the only way to stop them is Guy Fieri with a truck tanker full of donkey sauce, but this is, I mean, it's funny, but it's dangerous the latter. The time Americans were threatened by a Super Pig we elected him President Trump actually had a good idea this weekend it was Nick, it was actually Nikki Haley's idea, but he took it to make it look like it wasn't about him, he wrote to him Anyone running for the office of the President of the United States should agree to undergo a full

mental

competency

test, blah blah blah, and likewise, but to a lesser extent, agree to a test that would show that you is physically capable of doing the job of being an outstanding president.

It requires great

mental

acuity and physical stamina, or so you've heard anyway, but I hope, I really hope they do it. I'd pay $50,000 to watch him try to do sit-ups. Actually, Hulk Hogi spent his President's Day with a question at Hilton Airport. in Palm Beach, the truth is that Trump spoke to a group of supporters known as Club 45. Is this some kind of Trump fan club? Tickets to the event I attended on one website included a royal discount on ribs from Tony Roma, the Lord of Mar-A-Lago. "I got questions from the crowd, including a five-year-old girl who asked a question about inflation and keep in mind that this five-year-old girl is also there when the issue revolves around our borders and when she

wants

to make something very clear: Eventually we are going to legalize everyone, you know if that includes the criminals that are coming, which are many.

Remember I used the word rape in my opening speech and I mentioned the word rape. Remember it was so

terrible

that I mentioned the word rape. and I got straight A's on the speech and then about two days later they called and said did you say rape? I said yeah I said grape make America rape again it's your new slogan what was that idea about mental

competency

test again because we're getting more information about the devious mind of George Santos of all people George Santos, the soon-to-be ex-congressman, inexplicably sat down for a long interview with Piers Morgan, who asked him why he counted so many lives during the campaign.

Well, I'll humor you. This I ran in 2020 for the exact same seat for Congress and I got my way then and I guess why, well, that's honestly stupid, so you thought they don't really know, they're not going to find out, No, I didn't think about it. see the reason the reason he lied is because he usually gets his way. I don't categorize these errors. I think it's part of his cathartic process of redemption, if you will, it will start from I've Been a Terrible Liar. I mean, would you be prepared to say that? Sure, like I said man, well, I've been a

terrible

liar

on those topics.

I disagree. I think you've been a pretty spectacular

liar

. I think you really haven't seen a lion like this in a long time. I mean, for a long time now, this guy lied about his education, his work history, his family history is campaign finance, they are charity workers, mothers, volleyball career, he supposedly wrote bad checks, he supposedly stole puppies and told to a group of Jewish voters that he was Jewish, you are not Jews, well. I never said I was, I always said you were and I always would, but my grandparents are Jewish on my mother's side so I'm Jewish, that was always a joke, everyone laughed.

He had put him in a room with a thousand people in November. They were hysterical and laughing, he was funny to them, they loved him. I don't think Jews find it funny, they were Jews, yeah, or maybe they were Jews, you don't really know, that's how, that's how George Santos. he came up with the idea for the blackish program, it came from working in those meetings now, this is what a real Jewish legislator looks like, huh, look who somehow wandered into the background of a tick tock video, that's Bernie Sanders Unfortunately, the video was cut just fine. before I lowered it, but it was uh and why not today's Mardi Gras, today is Fat Tuesday.

Mardi Gras You Don't Know is a celebration that began in the 17th century, when members of a Native American tribe in Louisiana met with British settlers and gave them beads. in exchange for seeing her breasts and a tradition was born in Salt Lake City, they had a little party if only they had the NBA All-Star Game this weekend, you know, there are a lot of activities around All-Star weekend, the Slam. The dunk contest, the three-point contest, and the Celebrity All-Star Game, headlined this year by our own Guillermo, was a lot of fun for you, fun, it was great and we practiced for it.

I know you're in the, you're in the shooting range in the parking lot Hoops practice a little, a little well Guillermo is a better athlete than you could imagine by looking at them, but it was with great excitement that we saw him fly through the air with the greatest of ease at the NBA Celebrity All-Star Game I may be the worst player here, but I'm the best dressed here. You know, this is from Steve Harvey's husky collection. Yes, he looks at the towel. I have some churros there in case you get hungry. What can we expect from you on that basketball? court well, a lot of sweating and maybe a heart attack he's our best chance for a silver dunk during tonight's ABC game she became alive foreign music star left it a little short I don't know he's moving his feet laterally really good right now I think Enrique likes this matchup against him oh boy Enrique walks away from Deep Rachel and died on that airball at The People's Choice back to Salt Lake City right after this can I ask you a trivia question?

Sure, okay, are you ready for this? It's a celebrity game and there are some celebrities down there, one of them is Guillermo Rodriguez, now what show is he on? Jimmy Kimmel Jimmy Fallon or Jimmy Buffett Jimmy Fallon Jimmy Fallon that's right, okay, leading by three as we get ready to start the third. quarter of play Mark Jones cutting it off On the court they are not here to play they take this seriously I think we are in for a very fun second half but this was great oh there you go, I love that you have to make it choose someone's side, Come on, that's illegal, come back again, how do you think you've been playing well so far?

I think I'm doing the best I can. I think I'm doing well. I've been scoring a basket yet, but eh. I really want to score a basket, so you're basically saying give you the rock, yes, give me the ball, please, yes, pass me the ball guys, okay, so let me talk to one of your assistant coaches. Fat Joe Garimo says he wants what he wants. to rock more, what do you think of that strategy? You know, he's my favorite, I started him, you know, but we want to win too, you want some pizza, he looks sad, right, he smells good, what is Guillermo doing?

Wait a minute, this is not the time for that kind of delivery that's bad right here oh well cool I'm tired of what you have there I have the Killer oh the bucket doesn't count and team Duane wins it one more look the ball was still in biz's hand as the clock expires right there you can see it listen we didn't win but at least I have my cylinders here you want to try my cereal here I give it to you it's for you thank you very much wow he took my cereal yes very fun I'm so tired I'm going to go Let's eat right now and I'm dying for a beer oh well done you're good here plus everyone