Bill Burr being a savage for 10 minutes straight

I miss the generation of people who take off their socks and shoes on the plane, you have to look at their smelly feet and then they literally get up and walk into a commercial airline bathroom, yeah, wear it and then they walk and sit down. down again, that's not right, yes, if I were a dictator, those people would be eliminated. When did you start shaving your head? You can see it well. When did I start shaving? My wife shaved it for me. I have my first my first special. I shaved it. "No, yeah, when I saw you in New York, I'm glad you liked it.

I see you losing your roof back there, you'll be there, but we'll do a buddy cop show. Exactly, two bald old men exactly going after some." hairy criminal, you know, I feel bad for McDonald's right now, I feel bad for them, why would you feel that because they backed down they allowed the fat people to blame them and it's just that right by the time they made the salad it was gone, It's over, they said? You know it's our fault it's our fault it's our fault your fat isn't everyone knows he's fat Nick you don't order 50 sandwiches well but they're a deal if you ask for them they'll give them to you that's not their fault yeah Colorado He trains Rose and I'm a Eunice, yeah, do you love her?

I love her. I love her too. I love all the USC wrestlers. That's why I want my daughter to know how to know all those things. She would be great when she meets a creep like you, she could strangle you. You do not have children. No, no, I don't like the way you said you don't have children. No, I do not have. Any child I'm going to adopt I'm going to rescue a couple of kids who work until four in the morning to put this out, they make them catch it when it rains, it's fine and you have to stay there until it's full. family F is for family F is for family Jesus Christ, friend, friend, I'm low on the totem pole, that problem is your girlfriend or wife, you know, her friends pressure you like, what are you going to give her?

Yes, what are you going to give him? I don't know what he's going to give me, yes, he's going to give me a flat screen, oh yes, the pimping you have to do in a third world country is ridiculous. I have to buy a lot from the corrupt dictator here, like he's the deepest couch in sports entertainment. of people think they are uncomfortable with my elevation, do you feel uncomfortable with that? No, I just see all your insecurities. I don't know, man, the internet is too weird to give out all that information. Oh, you don't even know.

I mean how many because you're afraid it was yeah, optimize what you're talking about, it's either, you can delete this. I'm honest, dude, seriously, yeah, no, dude, yeah, these crazy people out there are fine, off the air, off the air, okay, I love how surprised it is, well, if you can name the number of people absolutely crazy, okay, yeah, and I always hated it when someone who didn't have a child says, you don't get it, man, you don't get it. you have and I was like you, I get it, it's like having a dog, but it's more intense, you know what I do?

Because the older kids, Robert Kelly and everyone, call you Billy. Colin calls you Billy, but I can tell. I immediately realize that it is not. I don't know about the chain, if it's thick enough to be that warm, that level of trust, yeah, well, but it's more of a necklace. Your Christian background is part of the program, yes, and I wanted to talk to you about Jesus after that. Well, I'm not the only reason I bring this up is because some people thought maybe you went too far, you know? Well, they thought maybe you were

being

disrespectful to the Christian religion.

I'm telling you you need to Google, oh my gosh, look around you, most people are weird looking, look at me, I'm a 100 white guy, I'm a weird looking guy, the best dogs are mixed dogs, they're the calmest dogs, I tell you, you're right. You're absolutely right about that, yeah, oh, that's why even though back in England, the royal family that's why they're all so strange looking, they're all banging in the same pool, they're like a bunch of Dalmatians that could talk. . right, you're whatever Incognito you're an enigma because I make a cake no, you know what it is you're not a good listener you've known me for 10 years you have no idea who I am it's about comedy with you and climbing the ladder and pushing people now are this, you're getting out of an existing house and uh, I got out of a one bedroom apartment and I thought I'd finally go out and buy a damn house and not have to? deal with, you know, some idiot that lives above or below me, okay, you know, yeah, do my own little thing, get my little 12 gauge, get a bunch of cans of tuna, get ready for the apocalypse, that's what I want to do, just ignore it, it's like three days, they go crazy for three days, they try to intimidate you so you have a chance, you can't ignore them when they're right in the audience and you're playing with them, they tell them to shut up, yeah, trust me , Trump is winning.

New Hampshire Hillary is winning, uh Virginia, really and there's a little boy here someone decided it was a good idea someone please take a picture of this last dinner the metoo movement has killed my wife she won't suck my dick again cock on your knees, it will never happen again because your stomach is pushing against your neck. I know you were laughing, you were yawning here, no, mushrooms, you're killing me, man, I knew it wasn't just weed, I was like that, no way I'm getting hit. there's something going on here mushrooms baby the mushrooms I'm using mushrooms there's no decision, he's wearing mushrooms and he's wearing pants like he went horse riding today like a saddle or something while people are talking about eating fake food, shut up, although I'm so glad I'm not in that kind of relationship because I can't imagine loving this child with all your heart, that half seems like someone you absolutely hate, that will be so strange, a constant reminder and just little gestures like the shape. the boy eats little hands eating toast, oh my God, that's that right there, yeah, I'm a lonely man.

I don't like people, so I just want to cut down that tree and watch it land on people while I walk on their heads. Now you are very afraid, you have the male feminist, where did that come from? The last few years I have been a male feminist. I have always defended women, no, no, no, this didn't come out and you are. scared, you did something, tits, what did you do, you have to correct that heart too much, what kind of man who still has his balls goes around saying that he is a feminist man. I totally understand the way you see the world that you can agree with. you can empathize, you can empathize, you can do all that, but you can't be it any more than I can stand here and be like I'm a black panther and then I walk out the door as a blue-eyed white guy and I. live that life right, it's South Side Steep and this is South Side Steve TV and this is Bill Burr that's your question I'm just saying who you are oh yeah, okay, I don't like you scaring me with that big microphone on that country shirt western oh no, this is not country western, it's like it's fashionable to wear it now, this is my nightclub look, yeah, come on, okay, this is, I guess this is the Internet, right?

Just throw it away. out there I just throw it out there I figure you're a funny guy and I'll go out there I'll throw it real good here's the deal Bill is a comedian he's in on the joke he's in town and you You're a funny guy you have these routines in your head, so I guess I'll throw you Mike and you go and stand up in front of nine people at a radio station. No, I'm not doing so well. You're taking the fun out of South Side Steve TV. What if I give you five dollars and I want to watch you line dance and you're racist?

They talk about Hollywood and behave like Hollywood. They create these images of impossible bodies, blah. blah, you know all that, the plus size actress, right, the fatties, that's a big thing, they're sick of

being

treated like fat people, I don't know what they're doing, they're going to be on the cover of the journals. now they just show how fat they are wearing some clothes and everyone promotes them like, oh my god, that's so brave, that's so brave, like what am I supposed to do if I ever see a firefighter run out of a building? carrying a baby and an old lady, am I going to sit there like, oh my god, you're like a fat actress taking off her shirt to do a magazine photo shoot to promote the movie?

She's in, you really are the whitest person I've ever met. Seen around, it did serve me well. I have never worked for anything. Yes, I was born on a yacht, everything has gone downhill. I don't even mean it and I don't mean it in a genetic way, I mean, like I do with you. I'm talking completely about White Privilege. I was stunned when I first heard about White Privilege. I had no idea what it was. I thought not everyone can do this. It seems as if the song is a job interview right when I leave. of the car you're higher, oh, see you tomorrow, so at the end of the hour they come to the logical conclusion, they say there's no reason to hit a woman, there's no reason to hit a woman and I was serious, I could give you like 17 from the top of my head, you can wake me up from a drunken stupor, I could still give you like nine, dude, there are plenty of reasons to hit a woman, you just don't do it, but to sit down. there and you suggest there's no reason, no, the level of ego behind that statement, all levitating above the rest of us, you're never annoying, wait a minute, how many times have you thought about slapping your guy in the face? head this week, do you do it there every day? you didn't do it right oh man it drives me crazy there's no reason there's no reason really there's no reason how about this? you marry a girl you fall in love you buy your house you go to work every day you pay for the house you come home one day she is fucking the next door neighbor he gives you divorce papers you have to move out, sleep on a futon and still pay for that house she will stay in with no reason to change