Kathy Griffin details struggle with pill addiction and suicide attempt | Nightline

kathy

griffin

has gone through a profound transformation but it wasn't easy, in fact she says it was unbearable. A little over a year ago, in June 2020, I tried to take my life and made a very serious

suicide

attempt

to lose all my work. overnight and having people in my own industry tell me it's over, leaving the country for five years, you've embarrassed our industry, you know, over and over again, um and it definitely affected me, so I got to the At which point he agreed that maybe it was time to go and I've had a great life and I don't think there's a next chapter for me and what I think really drove me to something so extreme was that I had become very addicted. to prescribed medications.

pill

s so I'm in recovery but I'm a drug addict Four years after the Trump mask photo scandal that nearly destroyed his career, a raw and honest conversation about

addiction

, mental health and now a shocking diagnosis Of cancer.

I laughed to stay alive and what I found was that I felt that if I couldn't make others laugh, then there was no purpose in living for decades as one of the few women in the male-dominated world of stand-up comedy. -up, bold, brash and unfiltered,

griffin

rarely throws punches and often pushes to the line, if not over it, one of the things that stands out to me is that you know this note in your routine where you said you know cool by Michelle Obama, go high if you can, I'm in the mud, Michelle, I love you, take the night off 'cause I'm in the mud with the pigs where I belong rolling rolling where I belong where I belong yeah why do you belong there um let's look at what's going on and in my case censorship and first amendment issues and we thought that I know sometimes taking the high road doesn't always work, but what is it about your background or even your spirit that makes you want to fight dirty or be down in the water? the mud?

Well, I think I'm a feisty girl and you know that's The way I was raised is the kind of family I come from and I think that's what people who see my work respond to, like an attitude, an attitude shaped by a childhood as colorful as it was traumatic. I mean, Irish Catholic family. Many of you know about alcoholism. Remember, it was a different time, so I was making mixed cocktails for my parents. You know, when I was a kid and I didn't drink, but I knew how to make Tom Collins out of powder. mix, you know, and you were a little kid so, I've never had a drink in my life, I think I just had this little voice in my head saying don't do it, I still think if I had had a drink I think I would have become He became an alcoholic very quickly.

His childhood was also marked by exposure to violence and sexual abuse. My late brother, the eldest in the family, was a sexual abuser, a pedophile, so that was very difficult and my family didn't really like that. I talked about that, I have to believe that it plays into your tough nature, it also plays into the idea of ​​wanting to be kind of a whistleblower in my comedy, you know, and saying things that you're not supposed to say. resorting to things you're not supposed to say in comedy put Griffin on the mat she toured the world performing stand-up comedy I've been very open about what I call my dental work you know I'm not going to lie to you about it I've got basic stuff in me head right now, but getting off the D list with her reality show about her life you know how to get to Carnegie Hall, but in 2017 many would say she crossed the line after tmz posted a photo of her holding a mask of the president Trump covered in ketchup indignation from all sides after that video of the comedian

kathy

griffin kathy griffin in that image no one wants to see this was not good it did not work the reaction was quick her tour canceled sponsorships withdrawn my friends left I think emotionally that was what more painful to have so many friends who to this day have not called me I would like to think that I would not behave that way I think it is sad that many Americans remained silent at a time like during my photo, when it probably would have been nice to take a position, you got a lot of death threats, oh I mean legit death threats, I mean people showed up at my husband's parents house and they located my sister when she was dying of cancer.

At the hospital and I called her and that was the intensity that I think I need people to know. It's not just that I had a couple of bad days in the press. You know these people are not playing, they will try to kill. your family, how many new cities are you announcing today, uh, 11 new cities today, it's a good running show a year after the photo went viral, we joined Kathy on part of her 2018 comeback tour, days before that he performed to sold out tickets. Carnegie Hall I'm doing a mini press conference, so I'll start at the view.

There will be two segments and we won't even do it. Maybe not too. Are you ready for a check? Give us a counter one, two, three, four. she caused enough roar and created some powerful enemies, please welcome back the fabulous Kathy Griffin. I'm here. I'm alive. I'm glad to be alive. I can't believe it's been a year since this. Oh, it's a year. month that photo was posted correctly and um we already did whatever it was yeah by the way I take back the apology it's just me y'all Kathy Griffin living legend I'm just a person that no one cares outside Radio City Music Hall, what is this sign? okay let's see how long it takes until someone realizes it's true, she didn't hold anything back, get it, it's me, take a picture, don't worry, and there was this exchange with what appeared to be a trump supporter , hello, oh, I don't believe you, oh, really.

You love Trump, let's talk about it how much you love Trump, why do you want to talk? Come up to me and talk about Trump, what do you like about him? His policies, you think he's going to give you a tax cut, ma'am. You're a woman, let me guess, you held your nose because you grabbed and that's fine with you, hey, hey, hey, relax, relax, look at this guy, start with me, she walks in my shoes, I love Trump, I'll kick his butt, thank you sir, you are. an angel from heaven we can get a quarter of a million let's do it sometime combative in public in private griffin was struggling painful moments like this captured by her husband for her documentary kathy griffin an incredible story i'm so scared to get off the plane it's going to be okay , you are welcome here why because no one cares about us, we will have your back, we have your back, I was really convinced that you knew someone was going to hurt me or all the things I had been reading would happen, I felt like there was impending doom. , I lost a ton of weight and I don't want to be cute like oh my gosh I can't believe it I'm still losing weight I meant I wasn't even aware of not being able to keep food down because I was dealing with so much it was a really hard time afterwards On your world tour the darkness became overwhelming at home in Los Angeles your

addiction

to prescription

pill

s got out of control how did that happen?

You know, the woman who never drank a drop of alcohol becomes addicted to painkillers and I think one of the reasons why she actually didn't recognize that she was a serious drug addict is because I thought she doesn't even drink, what? Does it matter? They take a couple of pills now and then, who doesn't and also my age was a big part of it, I mean who hits rock bottom and tries to kill themselves at 59 years old. It's almost a joke, right? I think it's very instructive for people to see. how did you let yourself become numb? how did you let yourself become numb?

I have to be honest, it really accelerated when the Trump thing happened before that. I'm going to say it was like playing with a pill addiction in a way that wasn't good, but after that happened I thought who cares and it's all the stories you've heard, I mean, the first time I they gave speed was from a doctor on set and he said, oh, I call this a 10 a.m. meeting. m. and I told him what that means and he said, well, if you have a show the night before and you're up late, but then at 10 a.m. m. the next day you have to be really focused, take this and it's your All good for your 10 a.m. meeting. and it's a very Hollywood story, right, and it got out of hand very quickly so take us into the dark night when you decide that's it.

I'm checking. I was thinking. I began to think more and more about

suicide

. When I became addicted to pills and it became almost an obsessive thought, I began to convince myself that it was a good decision. I got my revocable trust in order. I had all my ducks in a row. I wrote the whole note and I just thought I'd take a bunch of pills and I'll go to sleep and I took about 100 pills. I fell down two flights of stairs and you know, I'm not going to drizzle honey on chicken. 59 I don't remember anything about that.

Then I went back to bed, then I looked at my body and I could see I had lacerations and bruises and stuff and I thought, oh, I didn't do it enough, I took a bunch more pills and this time I fell again like, um, like . a marble floor and then when I came to I was like, "Okay, this is not good" and I had the phone number of one of my doctors and I texted him and told him clearly through a message of text that I said "look, I'm addicted." to the pills I have taken about 100 pills I tried to kill myself and I think all I did was hurt myself badly.

I can enter? That's when they put me in cycle 5150. What was her husband's cycle? reaction to what happened that day, I think my husband was actually a little heartbroken and I have to tell you that one of the things I remember was the doctor who helped save me in the hospital when I was still on day one and he kept saying something like Well, I guess I shouldn't have done this, but you know, I really think my husband should find someone who's not such a disaster and she said in front of him that there are a lot of studies about how detrimental it is to the loved one. one of the people who took his own life and I can see it on my husband's face, you know, and I can act like I'm thinking, oh, it'll be better for him, but it was really selfish because I know him well enough to know that.

It's kind of overwhelming to have to go from there Kathy started one of her biggest battles, the recovery, the detox was unpleasant, I mean it was months, I mean the shakes were like that and the flop was sweating and I was as unstable as when I brushed . my teeth my husband had to hold my hips so I wouldn't fall yeah it was crazy tell me the bright side when the sun when the clouds start to part how is that? I think what was really helpful was from day one. i got involved with aa i started doing that all via zoom the sober doctors came every day and tested me and every day my goal was to let them know that they have multi colored bars and my goal was like clean test kathy says she has She's been sober for over a year and still focuses on making people laugh, but now she's also focused on herself.

Do you feel that this brush with death has changed? That for you I feel is changing and I will always get the most pleasure. in the world for making people laugh and entertaining people for the way I get so much joy out of making my girls at my get together laugh out loud, by the way they think I'm a riot but I think I'm learning balance and it's about how how hard should you try and work and then when should you quit because in my case I have this nice simple issue that will get in the way of my recovery or not when we go back to the shocking diagnosis that the doctor said. picked up a mass in her lung kathy in the fight of her life again believe me the irony is not lost on me that a little over a year ago all I wanted to do was die and now all I want to do is live Hello everyone , George.

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