UNHhhh ep 175 - Hoarding

If I want to think that every man in the neighborhood makes me a baby, then they will hand me my rattle before the pigs, anyway, that's when I invented shoes. Yes, seriously, they all had knobs instead of feet because recently I had inlaid feet and then I avoid shoes, like? 'I'm all doing it, I don't know how to ask this in a way that's not offensive, I'm just doing it because it's my way, how do I make the courses look fat?' No, no, I feel like you've put a lot of effort into your drag in the last few months.

Where does it come from? How is this? Hour 11. Seventh season. Bursts of time. It's never too late to make a good impression. No, you don't know what. Well, first of all, thank you very much. I've gotten lazier and you've gotten more ambitious we're doing this like that, oh mom, you want to talk about ambition, look at the poor floor in the mirror, look at that slutty

hoarding

, oh, let's talk about slutty, hello, shall we? TRUE? slutty I hate that word hey kids, I came home early trixie mattel now I have a special treat between these candy thighs, let's do it again disgusting, it makes me even more disgusted that you said candy between candy oh no, I can't understand it. on those, okay, and welcome to the show where we talk about whatever we want because it's our show and not yours, that's right baby, the fan is back, I think we got it, oh hey, come on, sorry for the mess Have you ever accumulated? don't hoard makeup oh no, she collects

hoarding

is the compulsive collecting of items for which there is no practical purpose to the detriment of that person's living situation right, that's not me no, well, it was me the other day when I was at your house I slipped on a bag of um uh mascara and fell on empty packages of Tylenol I almost died half of that could have been true I actually have too many tubes of drugstore mascara sue me no one accuses you of anything except for For example, my Barbie doll collection, I would say it is less essential than my makeup collection, but no one criticizes that, but it is valuable, it is a collection when you walk into my house and see all the feet that you don't think about.

That's a hoarder who is a collector. What do you mean when I see severed feet and 14 scented candles? I think what hides the smell of the feet. I like the candle, but what if it's a scented foot candle because you want the foot to be? real you want to put on the real smell if everyone around you says you're a hoarder you probably are when you walk into my house don't think for a second that this person is a hoarder no, I've seen a hoarder, I've walked in hoarding houses and it is, first of all, it is hygienically, it is dangerous, you have the feeling that there is danger, the danger of limits, I love my mother, she does not see this, yes, I bought our house and I said: when? you move here if I come here and it seems like any of the houses we grew up in is wrapped up you're on a street hoarding well, like the traces of the landlord trade yeah, like we don't need things, but when they're gone when it's like a person new that goes to prison, they always have like a pillow, yes, a rolled up mat and they say, yes, this is how I told my mom to move into her house, yes, and there is surveillance, and there is surveillance, and me.

I will discover that my mother is the opposite of hoarding, she is, what's her name, an idiot? um, oh, she needs to hoard a little, she's the opposite, every time it's not spring cleaning, it's like every three weeks at home, she's like, I think I'm I'm going to throw everything in the trash if it's not pinned in the kitchen counter and not absolutely necessary, like the refrigerator, is gone. Well, you know, I drink and I love to get a little drunk and watch a YouTube video in the smallest apartment in Japan, yeah. when I see videos like that or tiny houses and sometimes you know I have a lot of things to do and yeah it's about the new boat and I'm looking at it and I go I always think I could live in that if I did.

No drag, I could live in that chat, it's the white person's ultimate fantasy. You have it all, so you want to scale it down a bit. That's not living in mommy, that's the Smurfs, that's Smurf Town, but it's all about how you use the space. you know people suspend their bikes I'm just suspended things I absolutely need I have to heat something in the microwave you have a situation up and down it's just a matter of pulleys please please sit on the couch let's go up dance party that would be really fierce it's all on a pulley and if you want to get really fierce, a garage button is fine, I'll have a screwdriver using pulpless orange juice and I go boop and it falls from the ceiling, there's no way you can have a jacuzzi jet inside. your bedroom, could you?

Yes, which one is your? What is your favorite style of interior decoration? Which is thinner, thinner, more minimalist. Yes, there are parts of my house that are, perhaps out of necessity, like a bookshelf with a few hundred dollars. I don't love that they are on display all the time with some but there is nowhere else to put them. They are old. They have to be on display. That's all. Yes, they look great. What would you call your place? Rustic cannibalism with an urban touch. Yes I hang, I talk, I hang heavy, heavy antlers right above my bed and it's just a matter of time, which way to go, I know, I wait, and they come off, the antlers come off and the head is very heavy altogether, although all three. set of pieces is I think she would decapitate me she died doing what she loved being decapitated enabling if you're going to hoard you need to enable fabric oh fabric hoarding those leftover costumes from two years ago became a ten thousand dollar job once we sold the dolls , yes, I believe it, that dead skin you have in the bathroom, put it in a little glass jar, your mom's corpse, you have big dreams about moving to the cemetery one day, so it's a vase, yes, too those farts you have.

I want to get rid of the jar jar mom mom 3 thousand 38 pounds why don't you know what I'm not mad at her no, I'm out of society people who buy farts Maria are you buying jars of air yes, but hot sexy air I want to do it I want make an illicit confession tell me I subscribed and only fans a few months ago that's all no oh no better I want you to guess what the specialty of this person's only fan is what he specialized in I want you to guess, uh, they're farts because I said farts , so it sounds like they are farts, you are right, but not only that his other specialty was the following: inserting whipped cream into his anus and then farting with the most outrageously loud and messy splash that mimicked what one would assume they would be buckets and buckets of male semen freshly deposited in his giant ass and I watched him mostly without touching me to take notes, okay, hoarding yes I'm going to beat around the bush a little bit about it, his body is hoarding and they don't even know it, let me tell you why there are trillions of microbes on our skin and understand this, we all have mice on our faces, every one of you want to. you look to the left I want you to look to the right every person you just looked at could figure it out and it's true, I'm not and we're not saying they might have mites no, no, no, they might.

They have mice, everyone, everyone, you clean their asses, then you make us dirty every time. The skin microbiome is a festering field day of billions of microbes. The gut microbiome. Hello, it's wonderful. Know? If you take antibiotics, you find out how important your disgusting body parts really are because I don't know about you, if I walk into a CV that even has an antibiotic in stock, I get diarrhea and there are certain ways I live in the drag and I'm still like, oh, I'm Still, you don't need to behave like that. Sometimes I think: did you just throw away that pressed nail?

Here's what was set up and I don't even have the other nine. Thanks, what are you rich? This is the thing about dry, you know, as soon as you throw that fluorescent yellow sports bra back, uh, or whatever you've had for four years, you throw it in the trash, which happens two days Then you get a reservation when they say yes. You have to wear a yellow exactly and it's outdoors you probably want to wear a bra yeah I swear to God that's happened every time I'm like Katie Carr calls and says I need you to win a blue thong by Thursday we'll have many. free drag queen shirts, yeah, and then I don't wear them and finally I'm gone.

I've never worn this insert drag queen here shirt, if I throw it in the trash, it feels like I'm saying, but if I keep it, I'll never wear it, so I'm sorry, insert drag queen here. I'm donating as a fan gift. Gifts for fans. That was a problem at first. It had to be this way, but Bethany from Idaho made this for me. This toenail sculpture now. I'm like, oh, she turned to Jared like she couldn't hold on to everything. I can't hold on to everything. You have to know it. You have to know as a fan, the gesture definitely matters, but we can't keep everything we can.

I don't keep everything, oh my God, a priceless ancient relic, oh literally, I'm like, oh, a Faberge egg, like it has to disappear, this means a lot, but I can't keep it. I made a drawing of you. I'm like I know what I want. looks like french kissing you okay let's take some pictures don't hoard if you can but definitely clean it's so fabulous if someone you know or love is hoarding call me and I'll just prostitute myself just horse no well There are hoarders. horrors very much alive yet to be buried there you have it you know yes I would like to talk about I want to know I want to know what was in the safe deposit box I'm still dying we haven't called because it's on the east coast I always forget that it's a call, it's quite a business, what a safe deposit box.

I came back to Boston and I had a safe deposit box that I lost. I lost the keys. I'm serious. Oh, this is getting creepy, Mary, we really forgot what. we're serious about what you're talking about we should have to do some brain sharpening yes because either two things are possible and both are bad two alzheimers one we hate each other no and yes this is just like how things happen for the people who arrive into your life for a reason, a season or a life or yes, and maybe we were meant to be friends because we don't have that many good stories and we don't remember, so it's just me.

I mean, it's always good for me and you. Do you know what it is? We both sell chocolate bars and go. I'll buy you your chocolate bar. I eat a chocolate bar. Yes. I'll buy you one. We just passed the same dollar, that's true, exchanging snowballs, you want to exchange, God, I thought they'd never shut you up, ready to do something weird, I am, but what are you looking at, oh, the talking lamp, Hey, what happens after the human robot? wars, humans became extinct and we, robots, have to understand who they were. We've discovered these 200-year-old videos about their lives.

You were in a carpentry class wearing fishnet stockings. I'm sure I would have been completely intimidated. a car or something but anyway I got 7th place on season 2 of rupaul's drag race uk so I'm really pretty and you hate me because I'm pretty and smart and then I punched him in the face and I passed out tons of times when I was so high, this is how this is not good, it's definitely a 12 year old asking for a photo and I'm incredibly high, why is the first season of humans available now only on archive gifts and what the heck are awesome gifts?

I couldn't figure it out, it's probably a place that sells ham.