Crazy Substitute Teachers

Hey, what's up FRIENDS? Today I'm going to talk about

substitute

teachers

. I mean, for the most part, we all love having

substitute

s. You like it, you walk into the classroom, you expect it to be a normal day and then you look in the teacher's direction and BOOM, he's a substitute! THAT! I don't have to work hard today! Most of the alternatives are great, they don't care too much and everyone ends up having a nice day off, Miley Cyrus, and you don't poke a kid's eye out with eyeliner. But sometimes they don't care too much and then it gets a little weird...

Like one time, I had a sub in math, where we were all doing paperwork or something, and this girl behind me was eating carrots. But suddenly, she started choking on one of her carrots and started gasping and vomiting. And they all turned and were amazed. that. What should we do!? We all turn to the MP for help and guidance or… something, because of all people, he should have a plan. And he just...he looked at her and did nothing. I'm sure if the girl could talk at that moment, she would say, "YOU, I'M CHOKING ON CARROTS HERE!" "WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?!" "DO SOMETHING MONKEYS!

AAGH!" For a short period of time, everyone watched helplessly as this poor girl choked on a carrot. Nobody knew what to do! FINALLY, a guy got up and did the Heimlich asphyxiation procedure they taught us. It was so readable! He even asked the question “are you drowning?”, like they said you should. If you haven't heard that technique or... if for some reason they changed it The steps are: (pay attention, someone could die) Approach the person and ask "are you drowning?" Don't do anything if he's not drowning. He really says that *laughs* Walk up behind the person and wrap your arms around his waist.

Be prepared to support him if he faints. Take your fist and place it next to your thumb around his belly, just above his belly button. Make a fist with your other hand and move it away from your stomach. And the last step is: you repeat pushing until the object comes out or until the person faints. Well... the girl didn't faint, she actually managed to pull the carrot out of her throat. And everyone felt... relieved. And after that circus, we all looked at the deputy to see what he had to say about the situation, and... nothing! He just looked at the situation with a blank expression on his face!

What the hell! What are you going to? I have never seen such a minor reaction to such a big situation from anyone in my entire life. (Hello? Anyone home?) I should create a reaction channel, now that I think about it... It would fit in with most of the people on Youtube who already do it. Anyway, enough of Mr. Blank-Expression. I remember when I was in high school, we all had a core group of substitutes that we often had when a teacher got sick or something. And there was this old man that everyone knew (yes, he wore pants that high) and absolutely HATED.

And before you say something like, "Oh, Jayden, that's a rude thing to say." In our defense, he hated us too. Every time someone came in and saw him sitting behind the teacher's desk, the first mass would say, "oh shit, today is going to be a hard day." Nobody had to say it... but we all thought it. "Okay, Jayden, what was he like?" Oh, get up so you can sit down again because I'm... because I'm just getting ready. Take the toughest person you know... ...and throw them out the window because this character is that person now. I think he sees himself as an army instructor leading young delinquents because he wanted all the kids to behave PERFECTLY, WITHOUT KILLING.

And...yeah, that's not going to happen in high school, so that's problem number one. He would begin each class with the same lecture: "Okay, sit down and shut up because we're talking about attendance. If I overhear any conversations, you'll get written up. I don't tolerate clowns in my classroom." "I'll say your last name, then your first name (mimes). And if I don't hear you say "I'm here," I'll mark you as "absent." You have to pay attention because you only have one chance and I won't insult you twice. If I say your name wrong , CORRECT ME. Okay, here we go..." He says the same paragraph every time class starts, and I know because he does it.

He told us enough times to memorize it in my head. I'd like to believe he has it written in a frame somewhere in his house, so he can look at it proudly before going to bed every night. *kiss* And he gets really angry if you don't correct him when he mispronounces your name. *laughs* I know this from experience. I don't care when people mispronounce my name, it happens all the time. I'm used to it. So I thought he wouldn't make a big deal out of it. "A-Animations... Dja-Djaiden." "Here." "I said well?" "He's close enough." "FIX ME NEXT TIME!" Excuse me? *lol xd laugh" It reminds me, for example, of Oscar Grauč if he had a lemon as a pet, but the lemon expires in 2 months and he forgets to throw it away.

Like, "Oh shit, lemon!" "ah, I'll do it tomorrow and then don't do it tomorrow... Well... I'll call him Mr. Lemon, he will soon be expelled just for simplicity. I really don't know why the soon-to-be expelled Mr. Lemon worked as a substitute teacher. Because you could SEE the hatred towards children in his eyes. Somehow, he made everyone in the class uncomfortable just because he exists. Well, I'm going to tell the STORY of Mr. Lemon. He will soon be expelled. We had him in biology class once and...we wanted to work on a paper he was supposed to give. "Okay, today we're going to do paperwork.

If I hear anyone talking, IT WILL BE RECORDED. This is individual paperwork, so there is absolutely no reason to talk to ANYONE during this class." "Go to the front of the room now and grab the newspaper." "Umm, Mrs. Grapes works so that each person at the table has a number and she calls out a number, and that person just gets up and takes the paper for the rest of the table to make it easier-" "DON'T I WILL HAVE SLAVES IN MY CLASSROOM!" WHAT DID HE JUST SAY?! *laughs* This man just compared taking jobs for other students to SLAVERY.

SLAVERY!!! Dear God! I nee-aHHH We worked his way, all 34 of us stood up at the same time, and pushed ourselves to the front of the room, crowded together awkwardly, to take the paper from the pile he made for us. You are a fruitcake. (or some other insult) He's done other weird and over-the-top things, but so far this is the best I've seen from him. Oh, Mr. Lemon, you'll be fired soon. You are truly a part of the job. "Without speaking." "I'm going to call your last name and then BLUEEGH BLUEEGHP" "This is an individual document for s-buffa vullafins reasons." "I will not have a skiffle in my classroom" I don't know what that is. "This is an individual procedure to skip the LA TE ERF paperwork." *cough* HA HAUGH RAAAARRR METAL GEAARRR "Jayden, is Jayden here...Jay-aiden...Jayden?" "An...Animac...

Đejden animations. Are there ĐEJDEN ANIMATIONS? ĐA-ĐAJDEN. WHAT KKUU-