Victor Kuppers: "La actitud que tú tienes es la que tú quieres"

Passionate about life and what he does, with a degree in business administration and management and a doctor in humanities, he works as a trainer and lecturer. He says it is a fantastic job. He firmly believes that you can live and work with joy in an environment that is not helpful and that normal if you don't have a drama in your life it is to live with passion with desire with enthusiasm he is víctor coopers víctor thank you very much for being here with us in education talk conversations I am olga morelli responsible for the academic guidance service at the abat oliba ceu university and Today I would like to talk to you about various topics but above all we want to do it with enthusiasm of course for me it is a luxury because I love this way of approaching education so for me it is actually a luxury and with you thank you very much for the attitude we take When we want to make a decision that conditions our life it ends the experts positive ideology when it works on the attitude and that is the basic premise the years we have a capacity that is to choose our attitude in any situation and it is not a minor capacity it is an immense capacity because the attitude that you choose at every moment can help you much more or much less to face the situations you are experiencing and in the end we are going to change the situation in life what is impressive is not what happens to us because we do not control it what is important It is in how we face what happens to us and now we are seeing a time in which we have all gone from front to front, emotions, rage, anger, frustration that opens or does not cause anxiety, anxiety that we are human, otherwise we would be sociopaths we can no longer avoid what we feel but we can choose how We approach it aesthetically not always being happy is impossible positive psychology tells us that always being happy smiling happy first because it is impossible and second because it can be exhausting sometimes life is very fun but sometimes life is unbearable if there are times when it is not It comes out being happy and we have to allow ourselves to be angry, to be sad because of motorcycles in life, which is the only possible emotion, but there is one thing, it is the 3-1 ratio.

We only take a look at Dr. Barbara Fredriksson, who says that people who are emotionally healthy have the radius 31 for every negative emotion they have three positive ones but they don't have that because they were born that way or because they were lucky it is not something that can be worked on it is a habit that can be done and what you have is what you want it is a passion You think it's very hard, but it's your responsibility. You have the attitude that you choose to have at every moment. In life, it doesn't make sense.

It's immature. It's childish. It's childish to be waiting for everything to go well to have an attitude because life works exactly the other way around. We have to. choose our best attitude at all times as parents as teachers as professionals as couples as friends because by choosing the best attitude we influence we help we cause things to go as well as possible if there is a proxy someone gets into the habit of constantly thinking about what attitude I have and what the attitude may be. better at this moment, at first it costs like any habit but in the end it is part of your way of being if you focus on always choosing your best attitude and you take that habit it is another life it is another way to go through life living with joy is not a It's not a matter of luck, it's about making a decision.

That's what he tells us. It's true. We have to learn to know how to make those decisions from the uncertainty that has arisen from a topic that the great management of uncertainty is complicated. It's very easy to explain it, but then in The very simple day to day life, the theory is known to all of us, but what positive psychology says is that we have to walk towards serenity towards accepting things as they are because from then on you pass the screen because thinking about what we don't control is crazy for us. It blocks us it paralyzes us it makes us small it makes us suffer so we have to accept it breathe say stop and from there it's my hands what can I do what can I do what can I do what can I do what can I do what can I do because before September and the two positions: complaining, regretting, looking ahead, if we need to be brave, be brave in a moment of difficulties, uncertainty, worries, problems, be able to choose your best attitude, that is the definition of courage in very difficult moments, bring out the best version of yourself, do you think we can do it? the right questions, that is, this action, not asking oneself, is very powerful in the human being.

These will soon be very important to find the meaning of life. I believe that the non-personal weight. The first question is that when you go to sleep there is two very important scores the first is this today I tried to be the best person I could be today I tried to be the best person I could be because that's what life is about life has to be a good person positive psychology in that case Yes, it shows and when you are not a good person, you feel good, but that noisy or external joy does not feel good.

No, you are not going to sleep. You say that I feel happy. I feel good. So I think that is a very important question and the second important question. It is today that I have done to help and make life for others more pleasant today that I have done to help and make life for others more pleasant I believe that they are the two questions that give us meaning and when we force ourselves to repeat them and repeat them back and repeat, you have focused on them, they are too soon because we are in a world that is individualistic, that is selfish, sometimes hostile, sometimes aggressive, we must vindicate the importance of the human quality of being a good person and the importance of helping others, we are in this planet in the end to help each other it is not worth looking away the social force not the society we have also experienced with this pandemic not that we are sensitive resilient beings you have experienced it like this yes we have the capacity to adapt and accept things and to adapt to changes, which is one thing that we have learned and we have also learned that we are very supportive of when things get bad when we suffer if we are good it is that people are good in essence remember at the beginning when people left applaud than talk I do because we applauded the health workers because in a world of morons they reminded us that the essence of the human being is in altruism in camaraderie in helping others what happens is that we lack references I am sure if I will ask on the street what is the name of the president of the American Cancer Research Association who is elected by its 400,000 members 1,400 in 800,000 because he is a Spanish doctor from Barcelona, ​​Dr.

Antonio Rivas, if I am sure about Dr. Antonio Rivas, he is passing by. here on the street and no one says anything and we have to do it in the wave and a guy does three stupid things on television and we are now look martin luther king had a phrase that was very hard in this generation we do not have to repent of the evils of the evil people but we have to repent of the horrible silence of good people if the good people throw in the towel the bad ones win and this pandemic helped us understand that we are good by nature and that the good ones win but sometimes we are very submissive or we settle or we keep quiet, I mean, I'm saying that a revolution of good people, a revolution of good people, that it's not cheesy to be good, that doesn't grant this thing of being good to three occasions of cheesiness, as they say, no, no, I don't believe it, but no.

It is the usual and I know what explains my students, forgive the usual and the normal are different concepts, the usual does not have to be the normal before thinking about what is usual, what is normal, what is correct, what is correct in the end, now As people we have to be dignified people be honest be upright be polite help others be kind I don't know how to smile be tolerant listen be respectful that is the right thing to do forget what people do forget what is usual because then the phase of ahead is almost the good throw in the towel win bad and we need to aspire we all want to make a better society as Kant said and public for you start with your world it is already a lot what are the vital aspects to help our children because it is also true that we live Sometimes that duality means that at home we mark those attitudes very well, those values, those values, but then when we go out on the street, they occur or the situation is different.

In my house, always with my house, this is not a dictatorship, this is a democracy, but Of course, democracy has a constitution and I do and the constitution was written by Mom and I, not intervening in the limits, it is not a democracy, yes, yes, there are limits that are not counted, and then there is a lot of dialogue, a lot of dialogue, a lot of dialogue, I have learned the hard way. to read it, to recommend to me the importance of dialogue, we are stressed, we are discouraged, we are lacking desire and that is how we have to dedicate and nationally, the biggest project we have in this life, let it become our family, that is our biggest project, it is our giant project.

Then we can give up our lives because we sell fried tomato and we spend all day thinking about fried tomato. No, you are not going to worry about the project, ensuring that you believe it is your family, because a very important family. Dialogue, because dialogue and accompanying and example. because the words convince but the example drags the example drags so we need dialogue but what not to say is just talk who wants to listen we need to have empathy let's say I have teenage children we have to understand them we have to listen to them we have to have empathy and you can't lose the forms at home I believe a lot in dialogue and affection, well, as you well know, in my day-to-day work I have adolescents and families and I am in that moment of accompaniment when they are going to choose their studies. university education for the future but I see a lot of enthusiasm in those faces but I also see doubts about that decision what advice would you give them company viewpoints for the answer but it is as if I were entering a tunnel it is as if both of mine are entering from what I have experienced entering a tunnel and there is one in the tunnel they no longer listen to you and finding you can say but it is part of their way of maturing is to separate themselves from their parents how important they enter the tunnel well equipped that the work before disposed of it very well and the second thing is no burden the relationship while they are in the tunnel because three houses go out.

I think that 18 years old is an age where it is difficult to be clear about what you want to do in life. In the end, the first important decision we make in life is probably that because in the In life we ​​make 17,000 decisions but important important don't get 67 crazy at 18 years old the son no no no no I don't know I really like to give advice but if it were my son I would say first ask for a lot of information talk to a lot of people the more information you have the more criterion you have to decide the second thing I would say is that you have to look for your vocation, well that is your topic, what you have to look for, it seemed to me that we have to look for them, yes, it is looking for your vocation if it is very difficult to find the vocation because the vocation, you are the expert but I, who am not the expert, would tell you that the vocation has to bring together five things.

You have one thing that you know how to do very well. Yes, it is something. We all have abilities. Gifts. Apart from doing very well, there are also people who had some things that they are not passionate about or there are people who are passionate about something but do not do well. I don't know. I am passionate about drawing but I am terrible at it. That is not a person, whether or not it is a vocation. It is a hobby, it is a catalog and it has a passion. You have to earn a living from it.

You have some activity that contributes something to others. It improves the lives of others in society. It helps other people. And the fifth is that it has to be consistent with its goals. principles with your values ​​because when you tell all that the second your vocation is that it is very difficult. Another piece of advice that I will not give to my students is that you two are obsessed, that is, I am going to work, do not be obsessed, let yourself go because many times life enjoys the process and life is taking you how many students are there are you better than me what they say I'm going to do this degree and in the second year of the degree they tell you I was in the wrong career then change it's too late too late if you're 20 years old if you're not 20 years old you're sorry You haven't seen it anymore, you better be a teacher at 26, yes, it means doing fantastic teaching, it will be at 24 or I don't know yet, I don't know what to see, unfortunate, I say, I don't know what parameter, no profession, but find meaning, find the purpose of your life now.

There are two very dangerous things, there are people who say that you have to do what comes from your heart, what a danger, what a danger, since what the heart comes from, if it exists, is to do what the heart has, since the pp now we are not rational beings too. We are not only emotional beings so it is a norm to say to the heart it is nonsense that is very dangerous so you have to combine the heart and head and then there are people who say no but never never never never in your dreams never threw in the towel never never never never You never have another very dangerous phrase at your disposal, not that phrase that has done a lot of damage.

The time comes when you decide, it's not my thing. I don't have the ability or no, so throw in the towel, nothing happens, you're not a failure, you've tried it, it hasn't worked well, I never threw it. the very dangerous towel when they have already chosen we have them at the university where he advises them is now where they have to put the focus but I think that we all remember university life in a fabulous fantastic time because it is the first step towards adult life you begin to have a lot of decision-making power until you get to college because surely most decisions are made by your parents and you go to a school schedulecrazy I pick you up I take you all week the weekend is cheap whatever I tell you then when I started having 1718 of the company you have to make tough decisions and you discover that being self-employed is not only about acquiring knowledge that is important but you have to acquire skills attitudes capabilities discovering the richness of interacting with different people learning about diversity being curious paying it forward you are the rest of us awakening curiosity working as a team university life on a social level on a sports level on a cultural level on a level you have to enjoy it you have to take advantage of it but to train yourself as a person not only as a professional but as a person as a human being if just now you made me think about that preparation of competencies and skills in a transversal way that accompanies the student and when we already have the student the halfway point has almost passed in that first to those first internship or their first job what would you like to advise them in your first job in your internship the least important thing is the money except I live I don't have parents I don't have a family I have to support and with Jon then but generally it's not the basic priority the basic piety when you are doing the internship is to learn is to grow is to develop yourself in your first job is very important your first boss do you like your boss you don't like leave every time you work the company but it is a personal life The boss is very important and then I always say you have to be obsessed with being extraordinary with being extraordinary.

When he calls you I had a teacher who always told us Coopers. In life it is not about doing extraordinary things, it is about doing the small ordinary things. In an absolutely extraordinary way, the trick is not to do extraordinary things. You are not going to invent the ship that is going to take us to Pluto and back on a Saturday morning and return in the afternoon. No, no, don't get obsessed with it. human greatness and professional greatness is in doing small ordinary things in an absolutely extraordinary way a few times ago in the dishwasher at home I live in the first mountain far away it is difficult to get to but there is a video that knocks on the door now the door appears Bill sir, I'm going to be manel, I'm coming to fix the decoration of the fantastic man, pass, pass, I say it, pass, pass, and I turn around, he didn't follow me, and I notice, and he was cleaning his shoes on Olga's entrance mat to a place with Carona and asphalt. on all dirt roads this cost more in the world between Manche and I I remembered I told myself how long it has been since someone cleaned their shoes on the entrance mat I could invent a spectacular story and leave you amazed but it would be a lie this is real not this spectacular but real and it has a message the man comes into my house and sees my family's shoes placed there and tells me I want him to take off my shoes I say I wouldn't like to work I would just need to pass pass each like my case is far from everything I anyone who Come on, we live on water, here you have a glass of water, even if I don't ask for it, I'm going to do my things to work and it's over for, I don't know, 15 20 minutes, she tells me, I'm finishing, I come over and the first thing I saw, Olga, is that the glass of water water that I had given him to drink, I had washed the glass and I had put it and the other way around next to the faucet the video that makes him leave it was with a liquid like glass helping the dishwasher and this is huge because I had to move it and of course how I have not to leave a single mark, what I have to leave impeccable like when a new one, if the man leaves, he gives me his hand, please call me if it doesn't work well and I the image of Manuel leaving along the path of my house, I think he attended to her at all. to a lifetime because this man was leaving I thought it was olé olé and I was great for him but how great not because of his studies that he wanted to study nor for his abilities not how great because he was a perfect example of how to do ordinary things in an absolutely way extraordinary and then so that they don't fall into the trap we always treat the companies that you come in one day and they say well you are called junior first year and only the very good first year juniors will become junior 210 year you give your life the skin to be a junior 2 and here you stop us from eating at home than your peers on Sundays because this is what it is clear for when you arrive there are about two describe senior exists only for those chosen with their own printer and it is years of leaving the life of the skin to be a senior and you stop playing tennis because you don't have tea for your friends manager and give up life the passion manager when you become manager he discovered that there is a territorial manager of the authorities manager speeches that there is country manager he dispatched the top floor or you leave life the earth is the country manager when you get to country manager it exists contain manager every age is divorced because you don't have time for ashes candles and nonsense and with say content the manager there is a global walk away manager and when you get to global world wade manabí you think that don galaxy manager is over and at 83 you retire and life stretches out you have missed everything good you have missed the most important thing in your life and that is what happens in some companies because of the company but also of oneself that enters into that game of boateng or leave life or not life you have to leave with your family with your friends with being not only with work is not everything about education and about the professional teachers of education who These teachers of education are accompanying the primary school students, secondary school students, and even the university students.

By the way, you are a teacher and passionate about this profession. What principles should accompany you to give the best to your students? I believe in society three. pillars the teachers the itary staff and the family pillars that are jobs that are sometimes vocational but they make you lose your vocation. When I saw it from the outside I think that they are going to make them lose their vocation and there are professions in which you cannot lose your vocation and enthusiasm and encouragement there are professions there are professions that do evidently because there are teachers who do not teachers cannot be discouraged because society changes with education so we need teachers towards work a teacher cannot transmit knowledge he is with teachers who inspire It is to influence, to motivate, to help, to accompany, and you can only do that if you maintain a base of vocation.

The work they have is so important. If we want good teachers, if we want good police officers, if we want good businessmen, we want good politicians, if we want. Not being good parents, we first need them to be good people and it starts with education because the response that parents and teachers have is immense because the future of society is in the hands of teachers and parents. It is so good, it is quite unfair. that make them lose their vocation and that is why it is to name the streets that despite all the circumstances and everything they have suffered are people who continue working with enthusiasm and enthusiasm.

Every time I do a session for teachers it is something pressured Well, now we are in a very important moment worldwide and precisely in the classrooms, in-person training has been transformed, now the universities, not the majority, everything is online training where that platform acts as communication and learning, what we have learned from all this, look, we have learned that things from reaching more people is when it has multiplied I had never worked with Argentina or Mexico because I like to travel so now it is true that it has its advantages, when I teach it has an advantage which is the open faculty but it is which must be very difficult because they don't see you, verbal language is lost, eye contact is lost, which is so important, eye contact is lost on a screen, always an advantage, the screen, the student, all the students see you perfectly, each faculty which is in row 17 because I'm already a little far away on the screen not everything is fine a little the face edited they look perfect I think the difference is not so much in the face-to-face relationship or the online relationship I think the difference is in the deep or superficial relationship and there are face-to-face relationships that can be very deep and there are face-to-face relationships and with being very superficial, there are also online relationships that can be very superficial but they can also be deep.

I believe that that is the that is the key that makes the relationships are deep using this channel but because there is no other because that is what there are images of the pandemic because there are none we are already lucky the agency must because the technology the screens is that if it were not for them we would not see that our parents If it weren't for them we wouldn't see our brothers, our friends with our children and I couldn't teach. Now I want to ask you for a message for those young people we have talked about who are the present and the future of our society so that they have strength and motivation. and contribute the most to their environment and also to society biagio young people I would tell them that they have to be aware that they are the last generation that can change the world 1% of the world's population has more resources than the remaining 99% that In those scenes we are all in sessions with the commit, there are many more people who are dying of hunger but how that happens in countries that worries us when you see the inequalities when you see that we are a world that is a savage capitalism because that is a savage capitalism that we are in hands of eight companies that everything is consumption that there is or when I was little my time there were kind people what is it that in Holland that Saint Nicholas on the 5th of the night of December 5 and now the days of kings but my children lived those kings to Nicholas now To the generations of now they have Saint Nicholas, well, those who are grown up have in it and kings have Santa Claus, they have Black Friday, they have the down and they have Single's Day, which in China is the day that is the most billed because everything is done to consume consume so much you have so much vouchers we have removed the person at the center of the center from life so I believe that it does not matter which side of the story you are on is no it does not matter and you have the responsibility to make a better world of fix many things that we have done wrong of those of us who have come before.

I believe that they have to aspire to make their life a useful life. I believe that there is nothing like aspiring to make your life useful, so whatever you have to do, take a flag. and fix the planet, no, but if what, as I said, is also what you want to see in the world, there is a phrase that summarizes all the concepts of personal development, positive psychology, and intelligence. Call it what you want, but all the concepts of how to live well are summarized for me. in a phrase and it is a freshness to discover in my early twenties, 25 or 26 years old and it is a spectacular phrase for my daughter and the phrase of Mother Teresa of Calcutta is my favorite phrase well my second favorite class my first favorite phrase is let's see if but the second favorite phrase is drama de tres a kakuta says that no one ever comes close to you without feeling a little better and happier when they leave, but that they have a full life a useful life feeling happy satisfied that no one chooses you more You without feeling better and happier after this life I don't know if with many you already make many fortunes or many mansions but you will have made a work of art which is what we are for thank you very much Victor we really got all that energy all that positivism and as you also say let's all be more aware thank you very much thank you very much and I really wish you the best because you do a fantastic job thank you very much