46 Times Chandler Bing Couldn't Control His Sarcasm

I'm not very good at giving advice. May I interest you in a sarcastic comment? A little bit of cheese. The ring is gone. Wake up with this ring. You are the worst godfather ever. I have decided that my godfather is my best friend. Gunther, which one is my? last name Central Perk, she's fine, my boss, Johanna, when you left, she started asking questions about you like what she saw, eh, Doug, my action, did she chicken out to change her name? Look, but I don't want to be single, okay, alone, alone, alone. I want to get married again and I just want a million dollars when you start an amazing tournament.

Chili. These people discover blank spelling games. There will be no one left in our port. I feel like someone has stuck their hand down my throat and grabbed my small intestine. I took it out of my mouth and tied it around my neck. Cookie. I saw Rachel kissing that jerk from her office on your balcony, our balcony. Seriously, that's so funny because I told Monica we should put lights on our balcony and she said no, no, too. It's cold, no one will go out there and I said maybe if we turn off some lights they'll come on okay.

I guess Joey went home. Oh, and look, there's still a box I have to unpack. Oh my god, you almost gave me a heart attack. very adorable I'd miss you if I broke up with you you're just trying to be supportive be supportive like a guy I broke up with you I'd miss you listen I appreciate you buying me the costume I love your kids favorites The book was Velveteen Rabbit. The Velveteen Rabbit was brown and white. Well, it was a pink bunny or no bunny at all. Nobody at all. Always no bunny. money, but this is a good game and I'm up for the role of this really cool international guy, smooth and affable, a real clotheshorse, so I imagine everyone at the audition will be wearing this kind of, you know, ultra modern things from couture and you're going to make everyone disappear yeah like you could find something as sophisticated as this 30 seconds all the questions you can answer I'm so good at shooting rounds I specialized in lightning rods okay we'll destroy you I wanna bet I'm so confused how to what we've been doing so far what... what pop no shake it's not shake shake that's what I did I can't do anything you guys the water is great you should really come in oh no, thank you.

I just had an M&M Joey told you about the leg, huh. Oh God, he scared me. Okay, I know I shouldn't have done it, but I did. I mean, I like it. I don't want to stop watching it, but every once in a while it's like, "Hey, you." you know why he is good the hard thing is she really wants to have sex with me crazy hey guys what should I wear to a Knicks game? a t-shirt that says I don't belong here. shameless you are, uh, you are You're going to leave me like this knowing that you're here waiting for me, okay, but if you don't come back soon there's practically nothing I can do about it.

It looks like she didn't beep at all. After all, she is in a hurry. Oh, I think this is the time. episode of Three's Company where there is some kind of misunderstanding of who this little piece of paper is, oh, that would be mine. Look, I wrote myself a note and then I realized I didn't need the notes, so I balled it up and now I wish I was dead. It's dr. Seuss, that book helped me get through some tough

times

. There is a little child inside this man. Yes, the doctors say that if they remove it he will die.

Okay, I can't believe you two had sex in your dream. I'm sorry, that's how it was. one time thing i was very drunk and it was someone else's subconscious orange juice looks like cider try it yes it's fat i drank it yes i know i did it two minutes ago could you start over after chewing all that gum to stop of smoking? Telling you this is like my parents' divorce, which is when I started smoking in the first place, wasn't that you, nine? Yeah, I'm telling you something he smoked for the first time after nap time, hey, who is this, this Casey?

Oh, some guy he met at the movies. Oh, really, what does he want with her? Well, I guess she wants to dance a little. You know, I'll make some love. I'll be depressed if you ask me, as long as you have this job. nothing pushes you to get another one, you need the fear, the fear, he is right, if you leave this job then you have motivation to look for a job you really want, so how come you are still in a job you hate? I mean, why not? Don't give up and freak out because I'm too scared, relax, okay, I can open this.

Anybody have a hanger, oh yeah, oh no, wait a minute. I took it out of my shirt when I put it on this morning. I'm really cool, you're smoking, so I brought something that will help you quit smoking, no, that patch doesn't work with fringes all over it, people, you know this, you know strange things, what's the boiling point of the brain, Dear God, this. This parachute is a backpack, I'm safe, I could get hit by a bus or catch on fire, sorry man, it's never a good time to stop catching fire, there's only one banana nut muffin left, so what am I?

First, yes, but I'm much faster, give it to me, no, give it to me, okay, go enjoy the coffee that was there when I arrived. So, what do you say? No, just do it, oh, I'm convinced, no. Hey Chandler, when you see Frankie, tell Joey, Tribbiani says hey, I don't know what that means, are you sure he can crack that code, it was ridiculous, you know, these guys were bullies, real bullies, you know, we're adults this type. A lot of things are not supposed to happen anymore oh no, wait a minute. I have no one. Do something?

You know it's special. Yes. Ross pressing my third nipple opens the delivery entrance to the magical land of Narnia. A girl ate Monica. She closes the camera. she adds 10 pounds so how many cameras are really on? And he was my best student, yes, she was my best teacher. If that doesn't keep the kids in school, what will I do? Sorry, we don't have your sheep now, there won't be any. Feel what, hey Shaymin, there's no anger, wait, there's something different. I went to that tanning place your wife suggested. It was that place where The Sun my family has been going to forever.

He made me my first suit when I was 15 years old. No wait 16. Don't excuse me 15. just when it was 1990, okay you have to stop the swab when there is resistance, you know what's sadder than this Bambi. I cried for three days with that movie, no wait, because on the third day my mother killed it, so part of the reason I was crying is that I see now that I can see crying but Bambi is a cartoon you didn't cry when Bambi's mother died yes it was very sad when the boys stopped drawing the deer hello Yoko I have scared you I have said too much I am desperate, uncomfortable and desperate for love.

Australopithecus isn't supposed to be in that exhibit. No no no. Homo habilis was erect. Australopithecus was never fully erect, perhaps he was nervous.