Executive Presence Isn't What You Think | Anitha Panicker | TEDxMahanagar

I am a first generation Indian immigrant residing in the United States, similar to many immigrant stories ridiculing systems of intimidation and oppression were nothing new. My parents worked two, three, often four jobs just to put food on the table for us and support their loved ones. at home, in the country they left. I was often ridiculed for my Indian accent, for the choice of clothes I wore in primary school and food choices because I didn't want to eat the American sandwiches so I took my CES and D. They made fun of me. They tripped me on the school bus until I fell.

I was excluded from team sports quite often because I just didn't fit in. One day, a group of mean girls even broke into my gym locker and stole my clothes. I had used it and flushed it down the toilet to find out it hurt. These were common occurrences, but I thought that one of these days they would simply no longer be my reality. A few years later, this immigrant girl was fluent in the English language and even managed to make a handful of friends who weren't pure evil. I have a bachelor's degree in psychology and a couple of MBAs and I'm in the middle of finishing my PhD so I am many things but uneducated is not one of them.

I have worked in one capacity or another since I was 12. I used to babysit my neighbors' children when I was 15. I was hired at a grocery store to bag food and push shopping carts, but I have made a living on my own. From a very young age and since my parents worked three and four jobs, a strong work ethic and the requirement to work very hard was ingrained in my brain from a very young age, so after my bachelor's degree I worked my tail off for four years. of a prison system until I proved myself to this man we'll call Steve.

Steve used to wear very casual jeans and cowboy boots and he smoked cigarettes like a chimney and I had the opportunity to be promoted to my first formal position. leadership role I was in my early 20s Steve gave me the opportunity and he looked at me and said Kiddo, you don't have the experience you need for this job, but I've seen

what

you've done with this last little job. that you had, you came early, you stayed late and you have great leadership potential, so Steve gave me the job, so for the next four years I would work hard to prove Steve right.

I surpassed all the objectives. I surpassed employee engagement. water patient satisfaction out of water every growth Objective they put in front of me. I got over it. I used innovation to grow every book of business I had in front of me, so four years later, I was naturally ready for a promotion and Steve thought I was ready. I applied for a job and killed the interview or so I thought. I didn't get the job, so the hiring manager said we went with someone else and when I asked him for feedback he said, "Well, you know you need it, you did great, but you lacked

executive

presence

executive

presence

what

is that?" I go to school for it because I love degrees, I'm going to get a degree in that, but no one really explained to me what it was, but I didn't have it, so it would be a few years later before I heard the same term again, but.

This time it was from a leading woman and she told me in confidence that a promising young man, a woman of color who had done great work and a strong artist, was going to apply for a promotion, so this lady came to see me. and he said, "You know, we're not really going to consider her because she doesn't really have the look that she needs, her hair needs a little work and her clothes are always a little baggy, she just doesn't have the look of a Me leader." I was amazed, this is what executive presences look like, that was the day I decided I needed to question my friendship with this leader and she was probably the president of the Mean Girls Club, the same club that threw my clothes in the toilet in fifth grade Needless to say, he didn't get the job because he didn't lack it.

He didn't have EX itive presence. around, I tried to define it and the best I could find is something like this, it is the special sauce, the X factor that organizations look for in their top leaders, it is something that cannot be explained, but it is like that. How you look, how you act, and how you talk, those are mainly the things that look good throughout the story, we see that executive presence may have gone wrong, so before we can figure out what it should be, we have to figure out what it shouldn't. should be, so that Already in the 19th century, Napoleon Bonaparte, who commanded armies and reshaped Europe, had a dynamic executive presence, looked the part, talked, acted, until his leftist power took control and led the European continent to unnecessary wars and left a trail of destruction behind him maybe that was executive presence what about former US President Richard Nixon, excellent executive presence?

He was catapulted to the presidency, but regardless of this, the deception and secrecy behind that presidency led to the Watergate scandal, if everyone knows it again, was that unchecked executive presence how about the 2008 financial crisis that occurred? the uncontrolled executive presence of United States government officials financial industry leaders uncontrolled executive presence and cost the world almost two trillion dollars in the global economy maybe that was executive presence modern psychology research presented us to something called the Dark Triad personality traits and when these traits are combined with leadership it is a dangerous mix melanism narcissism and psychopathy melanism is basically an intelligent but usually dishonest method of gaining the power to strategize against people who use people as pawns and situations as people to be used.

We are usually very confident, very charismatic, but underneath there is always something a little secretive that we see happening in organizations all the time and this has not just happened in the past or with big government officials, it is happening among us in boardrooms and in classrooms. Even in churches, narcissism I looked around to define is something like this: an unusually high regard for oneself, very high confidence, but with very little regard for other people, you can't tell them what to do, rarely They accept criticism or even constructive comments. from anyone because they know everything H narcissism or maybe it's just confidence or executive presence.

Now I'm not sure psychopathy is the most worrying of all. Well, when I

think

about psychopathy, the violent dictators of the world come to mind. They are generally quite impulsive. He can be very antisocial but usually quite charming and charismatic and knows exactly what to say and how to inspire others, but that could also be an executive presence gone wrong. So what is this? This is what I've been rejected for in the past. That's what I was missing. That's what was missing from that young leader that was emerging because she didn't have the right clothes or she didn't have the right hairstyle, how about we look at the executive presence that came out right?

What about Mother Teresa's Missionaries of Charity, did she found it? She could have had it. a life full of leisure, but instead she spent her life serving the homeless, the marginalized people, the needy, but she commanded respect and radically changed the trajectory of the world and the way you and I look at the world and to those in need, perhaps that was executive. The president has done well, how about the famous president of the United States, Abraham Lincoln? His leadership during the American Civil War constantly heard opposing views. His board of advisors around him were very diverse.

They didn't look like him. They didn't act like him. Don't talk like him. Look, he had a humble spirit. He was very cooperative. Who else can

think

of which leader comes to mind when I think of a positive executive presence? Nelson Mandela Nelson Mandela is another who he helped South Africa won democracy, he forgave his oppressors so we can say what we want about him, but he exuded executive presence, we can go on and on about this, but what was the point of me mentioning to Steve? Remember the guy who gave me my first chance. Because?

It's important that he wore jeans and cowboy boots and smoked cigarettes like a chimney, well it's because I never wore jeans and cowboy boots to work and I never smoke cigarettes or drink, he didn't look anything like me and I didn't look anything like him. nothing to him, but he gave me a chance anyway, that's the challenge here, we are pushing the limits, so I want us all to think about leaders today, leaders tomorrow. I want us to think about how we reframe executive presence and maybe what we mean is authentic presence, how about we start qualifying leaders? and people by how authentic they are, how humble they are, the way they present themselves, they are confident, they are concise, they are excellent communicators, they are active listers, they are empathetic and compassionate, what if we started rating people? through those glasses? from superficial oh what is she wearing she must be a leader look at her hair well look at how she walks she looks and walks like a leader but what if I'm like a dictator and the executive presence went wrong so I implore you all instead ? to stop at executive presence, rephrase it and say maybe I'm looking for authentic presence and if you present yourself authentically you're hired, thank you