Eddie Murphy Chased Down An Ice Cream Truck | Netflix Is A Joke

The ice

cream

man is coming! The ice

cream

man is coming! (audience laughing) Mom! (audience applauding) Mom, throw some money! (Audience laughs) The ice cream man is coming. (Audience applauds) Then your mother would go up to the window and throw coins and say, "Go get your father a bar of roasted almonds," and your brother an Icee, "and yourself a vanilla cone," and bring to me. Give me the change." And you'd catch all that shit and run down the street, full speed. (Audience laughs) Chasing the ice cream

truck

and he'd say, "Ice cream!" (Audience laughs) The ice cream man always drove a block more.

And I know he saw us and shit. (Audience laughs.) But I think he was just in the car with his friend saying, "Look at me speeding up these motherfuckers) And you'd be right behind him." doing 50, saying, "Ice cream!" (audience laughing) He'd stop, you'd be out of breath, saying, (gasping) "Ice cream man, ice cream man," can I have this, "I want this here" and a bar of toasted almonds for my father. "And give me this Icee here and a vanilla cone. "Thank you, ice cream man, thank you. "Thank you ice cream man, thank you." And you would have your ice cream, I would have my ice cream, and I remember it all, I would have my ice cream, and I didn't eat it, I would sing for a while, you know. (public laughing) You know how kids are, I would go... (audience laughing) ♪ I have some ice cream ♪ (audience laughing) ♪ I have some ice cream ♪ ♪ I have some ice cream ♪ ♪ and I'll eat it all ♪ ♪ I'll eat it all ♪ (audience applauding) And the ice cream would run all over your arm and shit And you'd be like, ♪ Ice cream ♪ ♪ I'm going to eat all my ice cream ♪ (audience laughing) ♪ Ice cream, ice cream ♪ And there would always be. a kid on the side that didn't, you don't get any ice cream, and the kids don't care, they'd say, ♪ You don't get any ice cream ♪ (audience laughing) ♪ You didn't get any ♪ ♪ You didn't get any ♪ ♪ You didn't get any You don't get any ♪ ♪ You didn't get anything ♪ ♪ Because you're on welfare ♪ (audience cheering) ♪ And you can't afford it ♪ ♪ You can't afford it ♪ ♪ You can't afford it ♪ (audience cheering) Other kids join in, ♪ You can't afford it ♪ ♪ You can't afford it ♪ ♪ And his father is an alcoholic ♪ (audience applauds) ♪ Do you want ice cream ♪ ♪ Does he want to eat? some of my ice cream but ♪ Do you want a lick?

Psychoanalyze! (audience applauding) ♪ Do you want some ice cream ♪ ♪ Do you want some ice cream ♪ ♪ I'm going to eat all my ice cream ♪ ♪ You can't eat some ♪ ♪ You can't-- ♪ (microphone taps) (audience applauding) ♪ Se You dropped your ice cream ♪ (audience applauding) ♪ You dropped your ice cream ♪ (smack your lips) (audience applauding) ♪ I have ice cream ♪ ♪ I kissed it to God ♪ (audience laughing) Eat it, I could throw my ice cream into a pile of shit and eat it. (Audience laughs) I would say, "It's just sparks, it's like sparks." But don't let your mom catch you doing that nasty shit. My mother would catch me doing that and she would make you stop.

One second and "Put-that-back-on-the-floor!" And you'd put that shit down quickly and say, "I wasn't going to eat that." (Audience laughs) My mother caught me doing that, did anyone get mothers who would hit you with a shoe? (Audience applauds) I had a mother who would throw a shoe at you, in the blink of an eye. And fuck you where she was pointing. (Audience laughs) Her shoe fit badly, she would like to carry that shit like it was a weapon. When she was 10, my mother was like Clint Eastwood with a shoe. (audience laughs) And you screwed up, my mom walked into the room and was like, (whistling "The Good, the Bad and the Ugly") (audience applauds) Why did you eat the ice cream off the floor? (Audience laughs) I didn't eat ice cream (imitates gunshots) (audience applauds) (whistle "The Good, the Bad and the Ugly") Bad, exactly.

You'd be in a grocery store and shit, you'd grab cereal off the counter and be like, "Mom, can we get this?" She was like (imitates gun blows). (air whistle) I guess not. (Audience laughs) And I can do three different things. Being on the phone with my grandmother and cooking with this hand, holding the phone like this and saying, "Yes, mom, wait a second." (imitates weapon blows) Bad. (Audience laughs) Fuck you, and God forbid my mother is dressed up and has those high-heeled dress shoes. (Audience laughs) They pump. Because then she'll have boomerang action on your butt. (audience laughs) And fuck you in the room, you won't even know what the fuck happened. (Audience laughs) They can hear you when they're getting ready to walk out the door, and hear you in the bunks fucking.

They got that mother hearing. They hear that shit and they're like, "Wait a minute, baby." (audience laughs) (imitates radar beep) (audience laughs) (imitates boomerang whistle) (imitates boomerang thud) Ah! (imitates boomerang whistle) Let's go. (audience applauding) (upbeat music)