I spent a day with TRANS WOMEN: "Controversial to be a Woman"

I'm Anthony Padilla and I'm curious what you would do if someone looked at your body when you were born and demanded that you behave and present exactly how the general population deems appropriate, even though deep down you always knew it was a lie. I

spent

a day with

trans

women

who came to that same conclusion, we will discover the truth about the reality of

trans

ition and the deeply polarizing topics of surgery, detransition and the trans agenda. Hi Dylan, nice to meet you, nice to meet you, Vicky, nice to meet you. By the way, this episode is sponsored by Better Help Online Therapy, visit Betterhelp.com Padilla because sometimes existing right now is exhausting and I just want to say that you are serving very well, yes, as a cisgender man, I can definitely say that, yes, maybe ask when Say it but don't believe it when I say it, can you define what trans means when you are assigned a specific gender at birth and then feel different from the gender you were signed as?

There is no one way to be trans, basically if you identify with a different gender you are under the trans category. Can you define trans

women

specifically? We were assigned male at birth and now we are female. Is there an age range at which people typically begin to feel different from what they have been assigned in almost all cases? we felt that right away as a child, right from the womb, you say this is wrong, excuse me, don't put "I'm on my birth certificate", when did you realize that you felt different from what you were assigned around the six years?

I always loved girly things and was told to suppress them. I wanted to grow my hair and I liked playing with Barbies and being with girls. I'd always like to think like, "Oh, I wish there was a button or I wish there was." I woke up one day and I was the

woman

I was constantly thinking about. I went to my mom when she was four years old and I told her mom, God made a mistake, he put a girl in a boy's body and she was like baby, you know God? you don't make mistakes you're perfect and from that point on I just put it aside, it wasn't until I was in my early 20s that I realized I was trans when I first found out that It was like no, oh no, for Please, no, you were still trying to be like, oh, I should suppress this feeling more.

I thought maybe a little further down, the first time I saw a trans person was on Jerry Springer, they called them men. Then they called them ladyboys and said, "Oh, I cheated on my boyfriend, guess what I'm a man." Those kinds of conversations hurt society and we think it's okay to treat trans people this way. I myself, by society's norms, felt uncomfortable about it. but now looking back, I felt uncomfortable because I was afraid to open up and be my true self. Was it more difficult to come out to yourself or to others? It was very difficult to realize that not only did I have similarities with the people I was most afraid of but that I could also be like them.

There are people who I feel pushed me to repress and I feel like I have more internalized that it was like repressing myself more and more like transphobic towards myself I thought oh, trans people are weird before I transitioned, I feel like it was like a deep insecurity because I was low key, you know? I knew I was trans when I was 18 years old. I always like to put it straight. and it was like stopping having those thoughts you shouldn't think like that you shouldn't be feminine that's what I regret most is like not loving myself more or listening to myself and the times I was like screaming on my 21st birthday I finally confessed to my mom , we had a long two-hour talk crying about how I felt, talking to my dad, although it has been very difficult and I remember him coming to my apartment and I had all my hormone pills on the table. counter and asked me, hey, what are these pills for?

Why are you taking all these pills? You thought I had HIV and I was like, no, no, I don't have HIV, I'm transitioning, that didn't go well for him and because it's like we don't have a relationship now, it's unfortunate, but it's more unfortunate for them, um, difficult, after nine months of kind of dipping my toes in, I confessed to my girlfriend at the time that it was the hardest part to get through. Just say it out loud, I even had to say it like in the mirror over and over again, even before I said it to a person, then I had to tell my parents.

My mom cried, she was very confused and so was my dad, they thought. It was a trend, uh, that I was just getting on board with. I think everyone thought I was joking or something like no one really took me seriously. How do you think being trans has affected your life the most? It's been a crazy ride just because I'm going viral at the same time I'm trying to transition. Does it feel like the whole world is watching you as you go through these very personal, vulnerable experiences? Yeah, yeah, I never expected to be an influencer or a content creator and it's scary to be. putting all your most vulnerable parts online for people to pick apart, but now I realize that what I'm doing can help a lot of people, so I'm just trying to have a good time. idea of ​​how to become the

woman

I wanted to be and that's what I'm trying to get people into because there were so many times as a child that I lashed out or did things that were a little reckless just because I was so unhappy with who I was and now when I look at myself in front of the camera or even in the mirror, I think oh yeah, that feels good, I'm just trying to be happy like a meteor could hit a girl at any moment and if I die as a girl, that's a beautiful thing.

Transitioning for everyone is a little different. We all have to go through a psychiatric evaluation. Many of us start with HRT. That's like the first step. Some people just take blockers. Everyone wants to know. about trans surgeries and honestly, yes, a lot of trans people have surgeries, but we do it to conform to social norms. For me, the transition was starting to take hormones. Your skin becomes much softer. You lose a lot of body hair. Your fat completely redistributes your hair. it gets softer, you just get here, you felt a lot less anger since the testosterone went away, it's just not like that anymore.

The funny thing is that all the hormones we take are actually prescribed to cis people in other ways in the testosterone blockers used to prevent hair loss. Men and women, Spironolactone is the other testosterone blocker that is just an acne medication. I feel like people consider it scarier, but all these things that people normally take. I had actually started taking hormones as a non-binary person before I had it. Even coming out as a trans woman, I know there are surgeries that I'm researching a lot and since I'm so new to my transness, there are actually some wait times that I have to wait for, so I will potentially and probably look very different in a couple of years you will have this to remember it strange why past Dylan when people hear transition they assume it means physical it's more than physical I absolutely believe I believe it's a way of thinking I think it's how you see yourself I Think that's how he sees you world if you want to see it from a more old school transsexual ideology.

Transitioning means doing the surgeries, getting your medications, but I would say the new progressive way of thinking is to transition however you want. Do you think it's appropriate for people to ask about surgery as if I'm not asking you right now? Okay, let's talk about what's in your pants. I mean, I'm willing and ready, that's after we shoot. You wouldn't ask anyone. about their private parts and then all of a sudden, because they're trans, you feel like you can't, my parents have said that when they tell their friends, the first question they'll ask is like, oh, will Dylan have the surgery? talk to my parents about my private parts you nasty pervert and I feel bad because I'm like oh my god like my family shouldn't have to answer that question why do you think it's become synonymous with trans peacock like this What in your minds do you want? to label me as a girl with a penis or a girl with a vagina that's how their heads work and they say okay, we just need to know what box to put Dylan in.

I can't wait until we get to a place where someone says they're a woman, we think they're a woman because they said so, everyone is obsessed with butt surgery, a lot of cis people are really obsessed with it, like it's a requirement, some People believe that most trans people, men and women, do not undergo butt surgery. I personally don't necessarily feel like I need it. I am very happy with Girl Deck. I think it's beautiful. You have a tattoo here of an angel showing the girl I love. dick girl is very beautiful it's delicious this is invasive that's the other aspect it's cute and it's expensive you literally have your genitals upside down you're bedridden for like a month I know girls who are like they can't go out because they have to dilate, which It's just sticking dildos into your new vagina and expanding it and making sure it's really big, giving it a lot of dove.

I feel like I'm more motivated by the dysphoria of feeling masculine than by feeling specifically feminine. The most unexpected part about the transitioning women, whether trans or cis, who let me into the club, especially the women I met before I transitioned, who were like, oh yeah, come on, here are our secrets, wait, what What kind of secrets are they telling you? Well, I'm sorry, thank you to the women who initially, right at the beginning of my journey, accepted me from the beginning because that pushed me to continue. Can you define a dead name? The name you were assigned at birth and why we call it. his dead name is specifically because we want him dead, you want that name, yeah, I say, don't talk about it, we don't know them, I'm sorry, you had your time, it's all about the president, are you living, okay?

I'm dead, it really bothers me that people think I have to change my name to be a woman. The top comment says that each of my videos is fine, but what would your girl's name be? My girl name is Dylan Do. do you think it's appropriate to ask what the dead people's names were oh no no that's what I mean no basically no how many times can you say no in six seconds how important pronouns are to you is one of those things that people don't I mean they should start respecting it, but they need to start respecting it because if someone says their pronouns are she, her, that's not up for debate, that's how they identify, period, I'm she, their girl, I hate being called something else. manner. pronoun if someone calls me he, that's literally the worst, it's less like I'm attacking whoever said it and more like oh well, what's not feminine?

Am I not being acceptable enough to all those people who really mean well, but are really nervous about what might happen if I accidentally offend this person, if they accidentally mix up the gender, something that is immediately offensive to you is the best thing to do? can you do. I highly recommend people ask people's pronouns if they don't know and I'm really not sure it's okay to ask my best advice to anyone who accidentally confuses someone: just move on, if you make a mistake, correct yourself and move on, don't It's like a death sentence for that relationship, yes, no, unfortunately it is.

It happens, but because we're also human, we make mistakes sometimes, sometimes I get a little overwhelmed when someone makes a big deal of it and says, oh my God, I'm so sorry, I totally see you as a girl because then, especially if there are other people around you, it becomes like this like it's like pointing fingers, like we're all talking about Dylan, it becomes an event, yes, it's an event and it doesn't have to be. I feel like a lot of people are very, very afraid of saying the wrong thing to see something offensive, I would say that we are very resilient, we have been through a lot and, uh, we are not going to like to fall apart after being misgendered once, it's better for you to just make some mistakes and meet trans people than to be so afraid of not making a mistake and never ever try to talk to a trans person considering there are so many ideas about what the trans label means, how important you think trans labels are. identity, I mean, I wish they weren't so important, at least the label of being a trans woman is useful to me because now I find a lot of happiness and euphoria through that, but I think the labels really did what they do is separate our souls by gender.

I don't necessarily think so. I think there's more to this than gender. I think it would be a disservice to try to whitewash statements about someone's gender because it's such a small box. When you break it down, you are consciousness. observe reality observe your thoughts observe your emotions your inner consciousness is still your guide and still knows things about you that the external cannot even tell you I don't think labels are necessary if you like them and want to use them as you have then use them yes, I'm trans, I'm not going to deny it, yes, but that doesn't mean I want to be labeled.everywhere I go with a sticker on my forehead trans woman I just want to be normal like I want to feel normal as much as labels are a shorthand for understanding someone it could also be a shortcut for someone to judge you it's a one word summary for someone for a person when in reality there are millions and millions of pages that would really describe someone's life full life story yeah if you don't like labels don't use them if you like labels use them for yourself don't put them on to other people, can you tell me about the trans agenda?

Oh, and if you were sitting there wondering where the trans men were, no worries, I passed. today with trans men will be out next month, don't worry and you know I can't leave without thanking dipsy for sponsoring this episode dipsy is an app full of short audio stories designed by women for women, women absolutely right, they bring scenarios . They come to life with immersive soundscapes and characters and new content is released every week, so between listening to your favorite stories over and over again you can always find something new to explore Dipsy also has sleep story wellness sessions and now they offer stories too written, so no matter how you want to enjoy those sweet sensations you're ready and four I

spent

a day with viewers and listeners of the uncensored podcast dipsy offers an extended 30-day free trial when you visit dipsystories.com padilla, that's 30 days of access for free when you go to d-i-p-s-e-a stories.com p-a-d-i-l-l-a now back to the world of trans women can you tell me about the trans agenda?

Yes, the trans agenda. We're all in a group chat and we all talk and send cute gifts and stickers there. There is no specific trans agenda if there was a trans agenda our agenda is we want to be loved we want to have equal rights we want to feel normal we just want to exist I heard that in some way it is what is called a wedge issue being something that divides people even more parties to indoctrinate people who are undecided about which party they should lean towards saying oh no we got you, a lot of people think that trans people are so openly and proud of specifically getting kids to transition.

It's not funny, I don't know where it comes from that people think that trans people always want everyone to suffer as much as they do, that's not the case, that's a big issue: letting trans people use the appropriate bathroom they want and here is the reality a trans person will not attack you in the bathroom if a man wanted to attack a woman who is using the bathroom he can simply enter the bathroom he does not need to put on a dress and long hair to do it there is something It is very toxic to look at trans people as predators or looking at them as violent people because sometimes we are more afraid of you than you are of us, but the narrative is that it is all these people who are really afraid of us, that argument.

It's very revealing of where we are when it comes to trans people. I'm not trying to invade your space, I'm just trying to go to the bathroom. How do you feel about the teenage transition? There is a lot of debate about whether a teen feels like they are trans or not the gender they were assigned at birth, that they shouldn't be able to transition or take puberty blockers, how do you feel about all that to start hrt you have to Have a medical diagnosis very frequently? people have to go through psychiatric analysis and go to a primary care provider and be evaluated by both, it takes a lot of guts to come out as trans and if a child has those thoughts and comes to you, that's really hard to do for adults, but it's even harder for kids, since they want to be honest with themselves about it.

I think if a teenager is comfortable presenting as the opposite sex, then I would say the right course of action is puberty blockers, if that. What they want is for puberty to be something very, in a way, traumatic. Puberty is what makes it so difficult, the reason you have to have surgeries, like your bones form a certain way and it's permanent, no it can be reversed if a child starts on puberty blockers and then decides to stop the onset of puberty, so you will end up going through puberty. There aren't many cases of a child taking puberty blockers and then stopping them at like age 30 or something and then hitting puberty, what I do know is that if people stop and if they stop, it would probably be around that same young age or when they are in their early 20s, they will still go through puberty.

I hear a lot of conversations about trans people. People mention the amount. of people that detransitioning is a little painted since a lot of people regret transitioning, then they detransition and then still regret it because they ever transitioned in the first place, how often does that happen? And you know, I can't go without thanking honey for sponsoring this episode, honey, it's the easy way to save when you shop on your computer or your iPhone. It's a free browser extension that searches the internet for promo codes and applies the best one it finds to your cart so you don't have them anymore. stare that empty discount code box in the face when you're at checkout because if Honey finds a coupon that works, a little Honey button will appear, all you have to do is click Apply Coupon, it's that easy and Honey supports over 30,000 stores. online ranging from technology to popular fashion brands to food delivery, so there you go honey, it has personally saved me a disturbing amount of money on my online shopping escapades and if you're wondering, yes, I used honey to save some money on this deodorant today and Like I said before honey, not only does it work on your desktop, it also works on your iPhone, just activate it in Safari on your phone and save as you go, it's literally free and installs in just a few seconds, so if you want to do it yourself. a solid and also support this series get free honey at jointhoney.com padilla again it's free and if you go to joinhoney.com padilla you will directly support this series now back to the world of trans women the times when I see detransition people in the media that a person is criticized and published in all the media and how trans people are not valid because this person decided to detransition.

I know a lot of trans people and none of them have detransitioned. We are all happier. less suicidal, if suicidal, because we transitioned, it is an extremely rare case, the successful hrt rate of hormone replacement therapy is 98, half of the remaining percentage can detransition because they are not accepted by the family, by the work, they can't get their medications there. There are tons of reasons why people detransition and I'm sorry it's the least common, but that little fringe case of people is what anti-trans people or territories or conservatives will focus on and when this case is used marginal to limit all the Other 98 people are very happy about this and it saves their lives, that's where I start to wonder: why are you so obsessed with detransitionists?

People are so obsessed with this marginal case because they want to take us away from the beginning. At the end of the day and it's already happening in the southern states for trans kids who now no longer have access to hormones, there are trans kids who are literally being detransitioned because legally they can't transition anymore and that's what it really is. depressing and what about the violence? What trans women face happens all the time, last year alone, around 45 trans people were reported murdered. There aren't many trans people out there anyway, so killing 45 of us is a big percentage of us, a lot of poc uh trans people get the most violence.

Many times the violence that is committed against trans people is by people who love us as our lovers, people with whom we have sexual relations, that is the largest number of people who are killing trans people, if you could say so. A message to your younger self who felt these feelings but didn't want to fully face them because of the stigma surrounding them. What would you say to that younger self? Hi baby Dylan, we've always been pretty fragile and soft. and sometimes it goes against us, but sometimes it really has value and I think your vulnerability is your power, your femininity is your power.

I'm so happy that one moment you felt like your true self and then we lost it for a while. but we found it again and I'm here and I'm telling you it was worth it, in the end it will all be worth it because baby, you're wearing a crochet dress with your name on it and you know what. you learned how to put on false eyelashes and you get to talk to really interesting people and you have a lot of people who love you and that's a really beautiful thing. What is it about being trans that brings you the most joy? what it felt like to be trans is the trans community is the travel pants trans transistor honestly I think it's undeniable how happy I am I think it gives me a lot of joy to know that other people look at me in a way that says wow that person really knows who they are , joy comes from helping others and knowing that it feels so good to wear what I want, let me tell you, and it feels so good to hear people say that they accept, yes, and that is joy to me. day with trans women and one thing that really sits well with me is how the demands and shame placed on us by others can echo inside our heads and make us doubt or even hate ourselves, but that internalized limitation of who we believe that we should be to others, perhaps the biggest obstacle to allowing ourselves to truly enjoy happiness in the world and within ourselves, yeah, I remember I was watching Smosh like when I was a kid and there's an episode where you grow boobs.

I saw it and said, yes. I remember watching it and thinking, could it be more like this? Can I get a keyboard? Did that start you here? Yeah, like Anthony was onto something. I was there at the beginning of your journey. Yes, literally.