Trump Meets with His Probation Officer, Goes on Unhinged Shark Rant at Vegas Rally | Tonight Show
Jun 27, 2024-Welcome everyone. Welcome to
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'sshow
. Are you here. You did it. Thank you so much. Thanks for watching. Guys, I'm excited about this. Steve Carell is my guesttonight
. You may know Steve from a little TVshow
called "The Office." It was historic because it was the last NBC show not to take place in Chicago. Yes, between "The Office" reruns and all the "Despicable Me" movies, Steve is basically responsible for keeping the lights on at Peacock. Well, this is exciting. Olympian Noah Lyles is here tonight and... ...he's the fastest man in the world. Can we welcome you here right now?
Wow. Incredible. There he
goes
. That was Noah Lyles, everyone. That's how it is. Noah Lyles is the fastest man in the world. Stormy Daniels listened and said, "Oh, I disagree." And you say... ♪♪ Speaking of which, today, former President Trump had his first meeting with his New York City paroleofficer
. Things got off to a rocky start when Trump offered the paroleofficer
$130,000. "No, stop. Stop doing that." Yes, Trump met with hisprobation
officer over Zoom, which was great because Trump's lawyer could mute him whenever he started talking. "This is all a..." He loves the process. Yes.
More Interesting Facts About,
trump meets with his probation officer goes on unhinged shark rant at vegas rally tonight show...
Today, a New York City
probation
officer asked Trump a series of questions ahead of his sentencing. And Trump actually agreed to join us right now to answer some of those same questions on the record. Let's talk to him right now. Mr. Trump, thank you for speaking with us. He has been criminally convicted. Where do experts think you should serve your sentence? -Prisons, asylums and psychiatric institutions. -Well. Alright. Well. You now own several houses. If you are placed under house arrest, which house would you like to stay in? -Waffle House. -I understand. You also face a prison sentence.
Do you know someone who has gone to prison? -All my friends. -Well? Yes. Oh, okay. In prison, you may sleep in a bunk bed. What would it be like for you to climb to the top bunk? -Mount Everest. -Oh. It's interesting. Of course, some inmates get things by exchanging cigarettes, candy, or cash. What would you change in prison? -Don Jr. -Okay. Alright. Alright. Yes. -And Eric. -Boy, you will also include Eric, okay, I understand. Look, many inmates also spend time exercising. What would it be like for you to do some weight lifting in the backyard? - -"Ah." Well.
Okay, okay, take it easy. Take it easy. Just so we have it, what size handcuffs do you use? -Tiny. Tiny. -Last question. What do you think you'll do after a night behind bars? -Thumb in mouth, saying, "Mommy, take me home. Mommy." -Oh. Thank you. Thanks for your time. Thank you so much. Some more Trump news. Yesterday, in Las Vegas, he held an outdoor
rally
in over 100 degree heat. Trump spoke for an hour in extreme heat, and it was clear that the more the temperature rose, the more it affected him. See this. -It's not as bad as he thought.I thought I would weaken here. And by the way, isn't that breeze nice? Do you feel the breeze? I'm here sweating like a dog. If you start going down, we have people. They will pick you up immediately. They will throw water. By the way, there have been a lot of
shark
attacks lately. Do you notice that? I do not care about you. I just want your vote, I don't care. Do you know what I do? If there was ashark
or you got electrocuted, I'd get electrocuted every time. I won't go near the shark. -Hey? What are you talking about?As we get closer to the election,
Biden said. .. While Trump was saying... And there you have it. Well, they are good. They are both one word. Well, some business news. Kia is recalling 463,000 SUVs because the front seats can catch fire. Kia recalled the cars, then the Kia owners said, "Hey, why don't you come get them? I'm not going to burn on that bonfire." Guys, I saw that Cold Stone Creamery is being sued because their pistachio ice cream doesn't contain real pistachios. -Oooh. - Well, today some other restau
rant
chains intervened in the controversy. First, Panera Bread said... Then, Olive Garden said... Then Taco Bell said...Panda Express said... Then Subway said... And finally, Arby's said... We've got the meat. ♪♪ Well, I heard Martha's Vineyard is about to run out of marijuana. So if you want to know how worried Obama is about Biden winning the election, he has your answer. Finally, guys, sometimes I see an image on the news that captures one thing, but actually gives me a totally different feeling. I'm going to show you what I mean in a segment called "That Feeling When." Look at this. ♪♪ First, we have a photo of the British Prime Minister looking at a table of baked goods.
But it reminds me of... It's like, wait, is that one? Why did I do this? Here is a photo of one of China's presidents sitting in a session of Congress. Reminds me of... Here's another photo of President Biden where he's wearing a football helmet. Reminds me of... Here's the last one here. It's a photo of Donald Trump speaking at a campaign event. -Oh! Reminds me... That's all the time we have for "That Feeling When." We have a great show. Steve Carell is here tonight. Amandla Stenberg joins us. American Olympian Noah Lyles is here. And we got some good music from Carly Pearce.
Stay, we'll be back with Steve Carell, everyone, let's go back.
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