Joe Rogan tells Funny Stories from Growing Up

He started losing his mind and we calmed him down enough to put him on a leash and took him to a vet and the vet said he had distemper. I had to leave him, so that's happened before, but I've never seen a dog die in front of me so sad, yeah, so I tell Kenny it's like we're fighting, that's it, come on, we're fighting. Fighting without excuses tonight and we drove and he wanted me to fight with people. I'm like a friend, I'm not going to fight with anyone because that's the way he would deal with his emotions.

MH, yeah, pretty sure. sadness fight anger fight looking for excitement fight is and then there's also this thing about young guys where young guys always want to be the crazy one like oh Mike is the craziest Mike is crazy, don't you It matters and becomes a social status among young people, especially, we were talking about this before the podcast. Everyone our age was like kids with a key. Everyone our age had a mom and dad who worked and answered the door in the morning and you were at the races, yes, you went to school. after school they weren't home for hours right, you did it alone and most of the time we're with other Savages our age, so it's the abstract influence of the parents on the kids that's really like give you your experience.

Who you are when you were young, yes, you are, you are, you are experiencing how these people taught their children and what the result was, because you are around the children all the time, you are not around your parents, no, they say. that you were raised by your peers after the age of 12, basically, your parents are away, yes, you were raised by your peers, yes, you are constantly with your friends at school, you are constantly with your friends in any activity. You have, you're looking for their validation instead of your parents' validation exactly and with my friends it was always who's sick, since oh Mike is sick, you know, oh Steve is the sickest, he doesn't care, he's crazy and there was as a value in that because everyone was scared, that was really the bottom line: we are all young men and we are on our way to becoming adults and no one knows what they are going to do, we have some friends who graduated from high school and now they are some losers and that could be me, that was the big cloud that was always floating over everyone's head.

What are you doing after high school? What are you doing after high school? And it was like this impending date. of Doom that was coming, so everyone was scared all the time, yeah, and everyone wanted to be, wanted to be a man, every time they wanted to prove themselves, they wanted to be something special and no one felt special, you know, everyone felt like a loser. I know we're all waiting to become adults so we can get a job like all those other people you knew that were around you or escape or find a way to escape, yeah, and then there's always Community College, like people are fine . you know, I'll probably finish when you hear I'll probably finish at community college, that'll be a semester and I did.

I went to Mass Bay Mass Bay Community College. I did it after a whole year I took it. a year off and I only went back to school because I didn't want people to think I was a loser, so I liked maybe a semester at Mass Pay. I don't even think I finished the semester and then I left and I went to UMass UMass Boston had this adult education program where you didn't have to have a GED or a um no Gad sat CU. I never took my SATs, so when I graduated high school I thought I would never go to school. again like that, but I got so tired of feeling like a loser like when I tell people I was drinking, I always said I was taking a year off, but really I just had no direction, everything I was doing was like do. martial arts and competing and I was so terrified of what the future would be, so I went to UMass for about three years, but not a full three years, it's like there were still a lot of credits to be acquired if I was going to go. graduate and I was just wasting my time, I was barely paying attention, I wasn't doing, I was completely half-assed on whatever project we had and then I realized what am I, why am I wasting my time, yeah, and then, uh, I got a letter that said I couldn't come back with the grades I had unless I came up with a very compelling reason, so they wanted me to explain why they should put me back in the class and I wrote it by hand. because back then no one had a typewriter, this total letter, so ridiculous like, uh, persuasive nonsense, better about how important education is to me and how important it means and then I realized how much effort it took.

I put into writing this letter to keep these people kicking me out of their school that I wasn't paying attention to far exceeds any effort I've ever put into any project in class, yeah, and then I realized, okay, whatever. What I'm going to do with my life is not going to work. imply doing this is not going to involve someone else dictating my schedule for whatever reason and you say clearly, I can write clearly, I can think maybe comedy, yeah, well, I had a conversation with a science teacher, this science teacher, um and that. It was the same kind of thing.

I made fun of him in class, I didn't necessarily make fun of him, but I mentioned something that was contrary to what he was teaching. He was talking about Lake being a dead Lake and I said, listen, they had a documentary on PBS. last night about Lake Eie doing a Resurgence and these scientists have discovered these new ways to minimize water pollution and all this and how other kids look at me like that and he got mad at me, he got really mad and he said, "You're undermining my class and this and that. I go, hey man, you're teaching old man, yeah, you're teaching old man, this is on TV, man, this is on TV like yesterday, yeah, and um, I had a conversation with him afterwards and um, because I had to talk to him to get back to class.

He kicked me out of class and said two things. He said one. He said first of all. I don't know if that was the case or not, whether it's true or not. and if you I allow you to interrupt my class and say something like that and it's not true, I haven't checked it, you're telling the whole class and I don't know if you're right or not. Or you're making things up but you're interrupting my class, that's the point, yeah Do you have something to tell me about it, maybe tell me after class and then I can go find it and then maybe I can correct it. the class that only two go to by interrupting class you proved to be more eloquent and smarter than you ever showed all semester, so you're half questioning everything you do as if you were writing down the entire paper you turn in every test you do every time I call you with a question, I should have done that, but when you wanted to correct me on something, suddenly you knew all the words, you knew how to form the sentence correctly, you knew how to say it. with the right impact, he's like you, just you, your focus is off.

I was like, damn, that guy has the money and I realized I was like, yeah, so I'm not stupid, right? I just can't, I can't listen. I can't do it your way I have to do it my way but I could I just didn't I grew up not having any direction so someone doesn't tell you what to do your whole life like you were essentially free I would go fishing, I would go out with my friends in the woods, we're just going to look for something to do and suddenly you're at school and they tell you everything you have to do all day like you're not ready for it.

I'm not just that like you're sitting there. It surprises me when my son

tells

me about it. Come on, what was your schedule today? Well you know, at 8:15 we sit for 15 minutes for the living room and then at 8:30 I go to my first class which lasts an hour and 15 minutes, then we have 5 minutes free and we go to another class which lasts 2 hours. They have these long classes and until 3:00 they get as they get. Like 25 minutes until lunch and they're sitting there being boys with chemicals coursing through their bodies and girls at the next desk with shorts and cleavage and little brown tits sticking out, you know, when the breeze hits them and they get goosebumps. . on the inside of the neckline and that cross Jesus is wedged right between those two brown the Italian horn the Italian horn and it's shiny you remember the people who wore the Italian horn oh my gosh, how about charm bracelets, charm bracelets, Yeah? the flip flops her little toes she just painted them oo very important toes a girl doesn't take care of her toes you can't trust her oh yeah show me sorry ladies I hate doing this on the same days